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The Princess Who Never Laughed: A Scientific Fairy Tale

dig dug dog

3rd Level Red Feather
Joined
Jul 2, 2001
Messages
1,678
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Hello friends. The following narrative, first of probably two or three parts, was inspired by two different pieces of tickling material that go back many years. Number one is the classic fairy tale of a princess who couldn't or wouldn't smile or laugh. I think the story has taken various forms, usually not involving tickling, but it was always ripe for our favorite sort of treatment. The second inspiration is from a book about 25 years old called "The Hand Book" which has a short, but very sweet section on tickling. (Coming out well before the days of the Internet, it was a rare and wonderful find.) The part about tickling concludes with the following analysis:

"In both tickling and sex, with two people under the right circumstances there is the proper, wholehearted, unfaked response. But in tickling, unlike in sex, you can't please yourself, by yourself. Logically, then, in human evolution, we should reproduce not by enjoying sex but by tickling."

Have wiser words ever been penned?

This story may not be everyone's cup of tea (and it has been tough to write), but I hope you all find it interesting and stimulating. At first it is heavily a "head piece," but there will be more tickling pay-off to come. Feedback and suggestions for the continuation very much welcomed.

dig dug dog



The Princess Who Never Laughed: A Scientific Fairy Tale (Part One)


The beautiful and peaceful kingdom of Ritzinia had been ruled by a single royal family for more generations than anyone would care to remember. The current king, Palter the 43rd, was wise and good, always striving to govern his people justly and to the benefit of all. He surrounded himself with able advisors, men and women of the highest integrity who were dedicated to the welfare of Ritzinia. Although Palter had no male heir, he had one daughter, named for the homeland itself. And like the land, Ritzinia was extremely beautiful. Sadly, her mother died when the girl was only 13 years old, and since Ritzinian rulers may take but one spouse for life, Palter’s daughter was in line to become the queen interregna.

Even before her mother’s death, the girl had been of the most serious sort. She studied avidly, listened to classical music, grew exotic flowers in some of the royal gardens, and worked on behalf of Ritzinia’s very small class of impoverished. When her mother passed on, Ritzinia’s solemnity deepened. She did not engage in the high-spirited and rowdy ways of other young people. She was unfailingly polite and respectful, but always in a rather grim way. In fact, as the years went on, she gained a nickname among the populous. Ritzinia was known as “the princess who never laughed”. As with all famous individuals, rumors swirled around her. It was often said that the girl was born without the facial muscles needed to smile.

Recently, King Palter had grown more concerned about his daughter’s character. Now 27 years old, Ritzinia was nearing the traditional age when females married, two years after entering puberty. And, of course, since marriage and child-bearing are inherently linked with laughter, the king was understandably worried about whether Ritzinia would be able to produce a grandson-heir. If she, the king’s only daughter, could not have a son, then in accordance with ancient law, the kingship would finally pass out of Palter’s family and into the family of the first viceroyals. The latter, waiting in the wings, currently had four eligible males.

All Ritzinian twentagers received sex education as part of their post-graduate studies, and the few who didn’t pursue them were “home-schooled” on the facts of life. Ritzinian society was conservative about exposing the next generation to sexual knowledge, especially the method of reproduction. This is not to say that people didn’t hear about sex ‘on the streets’. But as a sheltered royal, Ritzinia learned of it at the proper age of 22 from palace tutors who transmitted the biological and emotional information the princess would need in married life. She learned that as intimate sexual passion grew between a male and female, well prior to ejaculation the male would be driven to tickle her intensively; she learned that the resulting female laughter, combined with physical stimulation of her ticklish body parts, were necessary to induce hormonal and other biochemical changes in the body which would allow sperm and egg to join. At the same time, chemical changes in the male endowed him with vastly increased muscle tone and agility in order to handle a ticklish female’s strongest responses. While the sexual act itself could take place without tickling (a common, though psychologically difficult method of birth control), it would remain a barren union.

Logically then, evolution had made most Ritzinian females very ticklish and, just as logically, premarital tickling in most parts of the land was discouraged, although it happened on occasion to most girls growing up. (But only abusive or disturbed parents would ever significantly tickle their own children.) But mother nature isn’t perfect, and those women who were insensitive to tickling (sometimes called ‘frozen’) usually could not conceive. Over the centuries mothers had taught daughters to ‘fake’ ticklishness, if necessary, in hopes that the body could be fooled, while young men were instructed in the most effective ways to tickle their wives. In recent decades Ritzinian scientists had tried to develop a drug (Gelatrin) which simulates the effects of ticklish laughter on the female anatomy—without much success.

While it was impossible to know for certain before actual sexual relations took place whether a young woman would be sufficiently ticklish to get pregnant, there were general indicators of a predisposition toward frozenness. This is why Palter was becoming more and more anxious as the time of Ritzinia’s mating drew close. The princess’s well-know seriousness and almost utter lack of any sense of humor did not bode well for her fertility. Ritzinia was not depressed or oblivious to life’s pleasures, it was simply that she seemed to find nothing funny about life. Recently, the king had begun to purchase for his daughter the most comical novels available. He would sit outside her bedchamber while she read. Hours would pass without so much as a snicker emerging from the girl’s room. The next day Palter would ask Ritzinia how she liked the last book he gave her. She would explain that it was ‘charming’ or ‘greatly entertaining’.

“But did it make you laugh?” the king once asked, a little desperately.

“Oh, Father, they were just silly stories! And can something really make you laugh?"

Now, normally, if a married couple was having problems conceiving a child they had a number of medical options, one of which was for the woman to be tested for ticklishness by her gynecologist. Frozenness was a much-feared diagnosis, though frequently it simply turned out that the man’s technique was the problem, and this could usually be resolved through a few sessions of sex therapy. In certain cases, however, the couple was just not tickleable; some psychological barrier prevented this particular woman from laughing at the hands of this particular man. In such instances, the couple sometimes divorced and often each was able to bear children with another partner.

Ritzinia would have no such recourse. ‘One ruler, one spouse.’ Royal families could not divorce. So one day the king decided to act preemptively. Although it violated conventional mores, Palter order a leading gynecologist to examine Ritzinia—an unmarried female—for potential fertility. The procedures were rather intimate, even uncomfortable when conducted by strangers, but the girl, obedient as always, made no objection. She understood what was at stake for her ancient and noble family.

In the absence of a husband, gynecologist Daffa Noan and her medical team of three woman and three men would serve in the stimulator role as a battery of tests was performed on the princess. First, while hooked up to brain wave and hormonal monitors, Ritzinia was very lightly stroked over the length of her body in order to obtain a baseline of tactile sensitivity. She wore the minimum amount of clothing necessary to preserve some measure of modesty. The subject's eyes and ears were also covered during this part of the procedure to prevent other input from affecting the results. The initial data was normal. If anything, Ritzinia’s touch patterns reflected greater than average sensitivity, including in critical hormonal areas such as abdomen, flank, underarms, and soles of the feet.

Before moving on to titillation proper, the physicians did their best to establish a light-hearted, relaxed mood between themselves and the princess. Obviously, general emotional atmosphere was crucial to the success of tickling. This was one of the medical reasons why NHB (non-husband-based) fertility testing was rarely done. When examining a tickle-resistant female, it was difficult in a clinical environment to produce the conditions necessary for exploring her authentic sensitivity. But was Ritzinia, in fact, tickle-resistant, as her father clearly feared? Like the rest of the community, the doctors knew of the girl’s reputation as one who “never laughed,” but they assumed this to be a wild exaggeration.

“My lady,” Dr. Noan began, “we are now going to touch you in a variety of ways. You may experience different sensations, including sexual feelings. Try to simply allow whatever happens to happen. Don’t fight your feelings and, on the other hand, don’t force yourself to respond in any particular way. I may give you certain instructions and information along the way about what is going to happen. Do you have any questions before we start?”

“No. I’m ready. I hope you can tickle me.”

“Don’t worry.” The gynecologist sounded calm and professional. “Just go with the flow.”

With a nod from Dr. Noan, one of the female assistants, a tall, blonde woman, began to lightly tickle the princess’s stomach and, at random moments, to pinch her waist. Dr. Noan intently watched the monitors attached by thin cords to Ritzinia’s body. She then switched on another device which recorded, measured and analyzed every sound produced in the room. The other physicians looked mainly at the girl’s face. There seemed to be no outward reaction to this stimulation. By increments, the tickling increased in speed and intensity. After two minutes had passed with the woman tickling Ritznia’s abdomen, a male physician took over the process. He began to press visibly harder into the girl’s flesh and also moved up into Ritzinia’s rib-cage and under her breasts. This continued for another two minutes.

“My lady, what are you feeling right now?” Dr. Noan asked.

“Well, I’m not sure…someone is pressing fingers into my skin and I can feel him rubbing on my ribs…he’s going back and forth, first slower and then sometimes faster. The other doctor was doing this as well, only down lower on my belly.”

“And how does this make you feel? How do you feel when your body is touched in this way?”

“It feels…fine…I think that I like it. Is this tickling?…Is this supposed to be funny?” The doctors glanced at one another with some apprehension.

Dr. Noan pressed a button and above the princess’s head a panel began to flash with the words, ‘Phase Two’.

“Ritzinia, listen very carefully now.” Noan signaled two other physicians to move into place. “Yes, Ritzinia, you are being tickled. A doctor is going to raise your arms above your head and pin down your wrists. Another one will hold down your lower legs. We are doing this because Dr. Theladzo is about to tickle your underarms. This is one of the most ticklish spots on our bodies.” The doctors began to do as the gynecologist described.

“He will keep tickling you there for a long time and you might start to laugh or even scream. You might feel like telling us to stop. But, Ritzinia, we won’t stop. We will just keep tickling you.” With that, Dr. Theladzo plunged his fingertips into the underarm area of the queen-heir interregna to the throne.
 
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Oh Thats Just Not Fair. . . .

Evil Tickle Author. . . . That is just cruel to stop where you did!
Excellent build up and background detail. I hate being left hanging, please post the next part. . . .

Great story so far

Nicole <<<<----
 
Awesome story. I can't wait until you post the rest. ^^
 
Yes, Neverlaff Beauty is one of the classic Russian fairytales also. But to make her a princess of whole Tickling Kingdom... oh my, you're really an Evil Tickle Author =))
 
Thank you, friends. Your words are most appreciated.

As for "evil," let's just say I like to tickle your fancies good and long.

ddd
 
:justlips:
DIG DUG DOG,
I HATE THAT YOU STOPPED THE STORY AT THAT PLACE. YOU ARE CRUEL, AND I MUST READ PART 2. PLEASE DON'T KEEP ME WAITING!! CAN I GET AN ADVANCED COPY? VERY NICE START!
 
Dear Helena,

I'm sorry if it feels like a tease, but sometimes it's hard to write a very long story without checking in and getting some feedback along the way. I would send you an advanced copy if it existed! I will try to record the rest of the tale ASAP, but I am waiting to observe what will happen. I can't quite make out yet how all the characters' actions fall into place. (Feel free to PM me with help.)

Thanks for your post!

dig dug
 
Update

The writing of this story is moving along. I anticipate that in another day or two I will be able to post the conclusion. Thanks for your patience and I'm still open to requests/suggestions....

dig dug
 
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