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A Day in the Life, uncensored

RobAce

Verified
Joined
Feb 19, 2005
Messages
10,444
Points
36
Today I began by watching him awake. He walked past me and did not even give me a glance. I was pissed. That bastard knows better.
He better recognize! Anyway so I sat watching the wall as I am accustomed to everyday. Whenever he leaves, he does not turn on the TV, the radio or anything for me. So as I sit around with nothing to do, I can only try to think of ways to make his life miserable. I dream of horrible things, things that should not be said aloud or even in passing. Terrible horrible things. Like if I could take his glasses and replace them with giant spiders. That would get him notice me. I also dream of waiting until he is asleep and attaching pork chops to his nipples and letting the neighborhood dogs in to have their way with him.

The screams would be delicious. And the he would never, ever suspect me.
I could get away with it. I really could. So I sit here and wait. Hoping that the day he gets a little sloppy, and not with his love making....I could tell you stories that would make Liberace seem like Wilt Chamberlain next to this raging asshole. But I digress. This day I spend like every day. I sit and watch everyone else enjoy life. While I waste it living with him. Why, why I ask myself constantly. The music he listens to is bad enough, but WHY on gods green earth does he have to sing along! I mean I have heard cats being run over by a steamroller with more pitch than he has. It makes me want to pull my ears off and stuff them in my ass. Im sure I could fart a better note than he can hold. I hope he tries out for American Idol, just so I could see Simon throw up in his own mouth after hearing him.

So again, day turns into night and he comes home. No one with him, and yet he thinks he still "has a way with the ladies". The last woman that came over was delivered in box with a brown paper wrapper. But she left him too.
So now he grabs a box of cereal, walks to his room and closes the door.
And now I still sit here, alone and in the dark.

Not much of life, but I'd rather be Goofy than that freaking half-breed.
 


DAYUM!! There you go again Rob. Being all awesome.

Very nice.

You know what's really interesting? This, to me, reads more like a three second thought than an actual story. BUT, as with three second thoughts, there was so much damn story, history, character development and plot.

How the hell did you do that?!?! :eek:
 
Oh DUDE! This one threw me, and I'm not thrown easily. One of the marks of a good writer is the ability to go outside the box to express oneself in unexpected ways. You did that in a few short paragraphs. Writing as art.

Kudos, Rob....seriously.
 
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