TklDuo-Ann
2nd Level Black Feather
- Joined
- May 21, 2003
- Messages
- 8,393
- Points
- 0
I figured that I might as well take advantage of this. First, to explain the multiple handles. I have three different handles here...well four, actually.
When Drew & I first joined the forum back in 2001, we shared a single handle..."TicklingDuo". At that time, neither of us thought we'd get involved in posting things enough to bother with seperate handles. But, later on when I was asked to join the mod squad, we needed to each have our own individual handles. So, we shortened Tickling to Tkl, kept the Duo and added our first names so folks would know which was which.
Most of my posting since the split has been done under TklDuo-Ann. It's the one most folks know me by, both here and on other TK forums. It's also the one connected to my web site. TK-411 is my baby...as neglected as it is at times with life getting in the way of the very time-consuming work it takes. (Yes, I'm working on more updates and should have some up soon.)
I created the heyoka handle initially in order to post opinions that I didn't necessarily want connected to my mod status. I only used it a couple of times before deciding that it was a waste of time. The fact that I was a mod shouldn't interfere with my being a normal person with a variety of ideas and opinions. If I couldn't post what I honestly thought as myself, I shouldn't be posting it at all. So, I simply stopped using it. That is until recently.
The word "heyoka" is Lakota (Sioux). Literally translated, it means "contrary". There's more to it than this. But, basicly, it's used to indicate one who stands in contrast to the normally percieved reality in order to encourage others to look beyond to the bigger picture. In the intended context, it's also a person who brings hope. Since my even being here stands in contrast to what one might expect of a person who's survived what I have and proves that there's hope for survivors, I thought it fitting to use this as my handle for the support group we started here for sexual abuse survivors.
Why not just use the TklDuo-Ann handle? Simple. Drew & I share many friends here, some of whom will write one or the other of us, intending the PM to be for both of us. So, he is able to check my PMs if he wants on the Duo handle. Though I know he'd never read other people's PMs to me about abuse issues, I felt it best to use the other handle to avoid any possibility of confusion or perception of a lack of confidentiality. So, heyoka is my handle for the group. I've been using it for general posting as well lately just to make it more known and let folks see who it is...and see the info. about the group in case it's something they need.
As for theObsessed1... As some already know, I enjoy writing when I have the time to do so well. My old stories, posted under TicklingDuo, were pretty simple and not very well done. So, when I began to write again, I decided that I needed a handle that matched the stories I was working on. I also wasn't sure where I was going to end up taking these stories and if I wanted everyone knowing it was me doing them. Thus was born theObsessed1. While I've pulled the part-by-part posting of the stories that I originally had here for the sake of eliminating confusion with edits I made later on, the stories are still available on the web site I created for them. You can find them here if you're interested... TheObsessed1's Story Collection.
OK, so now you know the handles and their reasons for existing. What about the rest of who I am?
I'm 46 years old. I was born and raised in upstate NY. (They call it upstate even though we were only a few minutes from PA.) I've always been pretty much an introvert. Some of that is just the natural personality I was born with and some the result of abuse growing up. It takes me a good deal of time to get to know and be comfortable with people. At times, that has been perceived as being stuck up or things like that. But, I'm really not. If anything, It's the lack of confidence that keeps me quiet at times. I guess I'm just one of those shy sorts that needs time.
I (almost) always thought that I would enter the convent when I grew up. I actually persued it for some time before realizing that I wanted it for the wrong reasons and moved on. I've always been a very spiritual person...though not always religious. I've learned that I can find "God" in everything if I'm open to seeing Him there. I see Him most easily in nature. That probably explains why I love the outdoors so much and find refreshment in simply being alone in nature.
I was also interested in persuing various fields of science when I was in high school. I was most interested in geology, anthropology and archeology all of which still interest me. But, health issues (allergies to nearly everything I'd have to be around) prevented me from persuing them. I also considered a career in nursing. But, the same health issues forced me out of that as well. I spent lots of time taking care of elderly neighbors and family friends as a home health aide. But, I finally had to give that up as well when I could no longer safely move patients. Now, I just stay home and do things only as my body allows me to.
Most of the things I enjoy doing are things I can do alone and that don't necessarily involve a lot of physical activity....reading, writing, crafts, baking, gardening, etc. But, I also like being with close friends...mainly just hanging out and not doing anything in particular. Being in crowds or around noisy people is something I find particularly exhausting. So, even if it's folks I like, I tend to gravitate away from them for simple self-preservation. When I do push myself to be around groups or personalities that drain me, I find myself eager to go somewhere quiet where I can get my energy back.
I've had a variety of chronic health issues since childhood. Sometimes, they're simple nuisance level aches and pains. Other times, they prevent me from doing much of anything. Pain is a constant companion that has changed my entire life. I used to be very active...running, playing ball, hiking, etc. Now, there are few days when I feel up to doing a lot of physical activity. When I do, I pay for it after the fact. So, I find myself picking and choosing what I get involved in. This is one of the things that keeps me from being online as much as I'd like to be as well since there are days when I can't even sit at the computer for any length of time without being in pain. I accept it most days. Other days, when there's stuff I want to do and can't, I get really upset about it. Such is life.
Tickling is something that has drawn me since early childhood. I've neraly always loved it. Growing up, several of us in the neighborhood got into tickle fights and had tickling contests to see who could keep from laughing the longest, on a regular basis. Nearly everyone with whom I've become friends over the years has been at least somewhat into tickling. The first guy I dated seriously was very much a ler and used to tickle me senseless...that is, if I didn't send him flying across the room before he got me to the point of helplessness.
Helplessness is the hate side of things for me when it comes to tickling. Since tickling was used against me in some abuse situations, I tend to react with fear and panic if someone gets me to that point. For a few years, I couldn't even stand the thought of being tickled and would literally run and hide in terror if someone suggested it. I've overcome that for the most part. But, it's still there and a big part of why I'm sometimes hesitant to submit...esp. with folks I don't know really well. My being a part of this community actually started out as an effort to desensitize myself to that fear and reclaim the joy of tickling. I still have my moments and often flash at least somewhat during more intense tickle sessions. But, I'm now generally able to brush them off and still enjoy things.
Drew & I found one another through the community. He wrote me after finding my original Tickle Chamber site. We gabbed back and forth via e-mail, then IM, then on the phone for several weeks. Then he drove up for a weekend visit. We knew very quickly that we were meant for one another. So, when a case I was on ended and I found myself needing to find another job, I moved down here to be with him. A few months later, he proposed while we were on a retreat together. We were married in August of 2001. I still consider myself very blessed to have found him.
Tickling is a big part of our life together. We both love it and tickle one another at least a bit several times a day. It's really still a love/hate thing for me. I truly love it but have increasing difficulty in trying not to fight off the ler(s). Until fairly recently, I could hold back reacting pretty well...and enjoyed driving him (and other lers) nuts by doing so. But, it seems that the hormonal changes of perimenopaus is making me even more ticklish and less able to resist. That's cool aside from the fact that I get tired and start hurting much more quickly if I'm free to fight. Bondage is pretty much a must for us to keep Drew from getting hurt and now to keep me from wearing myself out as quickly so we can enjoy it more.
We've made several good friends here in the community. But, we're always open to making more. So, if we don't know you yet and you want to get to know us, feel free to drop us a note. We'd love to hear from you. Just remember that it takes us time to get to know folks. So, patience is appreciated.
I'm sure I've left out plenty here. But, I wrote it up piecemeal in between doing other things. (That's kinda how my online life is lately.) Anyway, if anyone has question or comments, fire away.
[For those who love all those networking sites... I do not accept requests to join new sites. I have a myspace page that I rarely use and will likely be dumping. I don't have time to join several different places. If you want to correspond with me, this is the place to do so.]
When Drew & I first joined the forum back in 2001, we shared a single handle..."TicklingDuo". At that time, neither of us thought we'd get involved in posting things enough to bother with seperate handles. But, later on when I was asked to join the mod squad, we needed to each have our own individual handles. So, we shortened Tickling to Tkl, kept the Duo and added our first names so folks would know which was which.
Most of my posting since the split has been done under TklDuo-Ann. It's the one most folks know me by, both here and on other TK forums. It's also the one connected to my web site. TK-411 is my baby...as neglected as it is at times with life getting in the way of the very time-consuming work it takes. (Yes, I'm working on more updates and should have some up soon.)
I created the heyoka handle initially in order to post opinions that I didn't necessarily want connected to my mod status. I only used it a couple of times before deciding that it was a waste of time. The fact that I was a mod shouldn't interfere with my being a normal person with a variety of ideas and opinions. If I couldn't post what I honestly thought as myself, I shouldn't be posting it at all. So, I simply stopped using it. That is until recently.
The word "heyoka" is Lakota (Sioux). Literally translated, it means "contrary". There's more to it than this. But, basicly, it's used to indicate one who stands in contrast to the normally percieved reality in order to encourage others to look beyond to the bigger picture. In the intended context, it's also a person who brings hope. Since my even being here stands in contrast to what one might expect of a person who's survived what I have and proves that there's hope for survivors, I thought it fitting to use this as my handle for the support group we started here for sexual abuse survivors.
Why not just use the TklDuo-Ann handle? Simple. Drew & I share many friends here, some of whom will write one or the other of us, intending the PM to be for both of us. So, he is able to check my PMs if he wants on the Duo handle. Though I know he'd never read other people's PMs to me about abuse issues, I felt it best to use the other handle to avoid any possibility of confusion or perception of a lack of confidentiality. So, heyoka is my handle for the group. I've been using it for general posting as well lately just to make it more known and let folks see who it is...and see the info. about the group in case it's something they need.
As for theObsessed1... As some already know, I enjoy writing when I have the time to do so well. My old stories, posted under TicklingDuo, were pretty simple and not very well done. So, when I began to write again, I decided that I needed a handle that matched the stories I was working on. I also wasn't sure where I was going to end up taking these stories and if I wanted everyone knowing it was me doing them. Thus was born theObsessed1. While I've pulled the part-by-part posting of the stories that I originally had here for the sake of eliminating confusion with edits I made later on, the stories are still available on the web site I created for them. You can find them here if you're interested... TheObsessed1's Story Collection.
OK, so now you know the handles and their reasons for existing. What about the rest of who I am?
I'm 46 years old. I was born and raised in upstate NY. (They call it upstate even though we were only a few minutes from PA.) I've always been pretty much an introvert. Some of that is just the natural personality I was born with and some the result of abuse growing up. It takes me a good deal of time to get to know and be comfortable with people. At times, that has been perceived as being stuck up or things like that. But, I'm really not. If anything, It's the lack of confidence that keeps me quiet at times. I guess I'm just one of those shy sorts that needs time.
I (almost) always thought that I would enter the convent when I grew up. I actually persued it for some time before realizing that I wanted it for the wrong reasons and moved on. I've always been a very spiritual person...though not always religious. I've learned that I can find "God" in everything if I'm open to seeing Him there. I see Him most easily in nature. That probably explains why I love the outdoors so much and find refreshment in simply being alone in nature.
I was also interested in persuing various fields of science when I was in high school. I was most interested in geology, anthropology and archeology all of which still interest me. But, health issues (allergies to nearly everything I'd have to be around) prevented me from persuing them. I also considered a career in nursing. But, the same health issues forced me out of that as well. I spent lots of time taking care of elderly neighbors and family friends as a home health aide. But, I finally had to give that up as well when I could no longer safely move patients. Now, I just stay home and do things only as my body allows me to.
Most of the things I enjoy doing are things I can do alone and that don't necessarily involve a lot of physical activity....reading, writing, crafts, baking, gardening, etc. But, I also like being with close friends...mainly just hanging out and not doing anything in particular. Being in crowds or around noisy people is something I find particularly exhausting. So, even if it's folks I like, I tend to gravitate away from them for simple self-preservation. When I do push myself to be around groups or personalities that drain me, I find myself eager to go somewhere quiet where I can get my energy back.
I've had a variety of chronic health issues since childhood. Sometimes, they're simple nuisance level aches and pains. Other times, they prevent me from doing much of anything. Pain is a constant companion that has changed my entire life. I used to be very active...running, playing ball, hiking, etc. Now, there are few days when I feel up to doing a lot of physical activity. When I do, I pay for it after the fact. So, I find myself picking and choosing what I get involved in. This is one of the things that keeps me from being online as much as I'd like to be as well since there are days when I can't even sit at the computer for any length of time without being in pain. I accept it most days. Other days, when there's stuff I want to do and can't, I get really upset about it. Such is life.
Tickling is something that has drawn me since early childhood. I've neraly always loved it. Growing up, several of us in the neighborhood got into tickle fights and had tickling contests to see who could keep from laughing the longest, on a regular basis. Nearly everyone with whom I've become friends over the years has been at least somewhat into tickling. The first guy I dated seriously was very much a ler and used to tickle me senseless...that is, if I didn't send him flying across the room before he got me to the point of helplessness.
Helplessness is the hate side of things for me when it comes to tickling. Since tickling was used against me in some abuse situations, I tend to react with fear and panic if someone gets me to that point. For a few years, I couldn't even stand the thought of being tickled and would literally run and hide in terror if someone suggested it. I've overcome that for the most part. But, it's still there and a big part of why I'm sometimes hesitant to submit...esp. with folks I don't know really well. My being a part of this community actually started out as an effort to desensitize myself to that fear and reclaim the joy of tickling. I still have my moments and often flash at least somewhat during more intense tickle sessions. But, I'm now generally able to brush them off and still enjoy things.
Drew & I found one another through the community. He wrote me after finding my original Tickle Chamber site. We gabbed back and forth via e-mail, then IM, then on the phone for several weeks. Then he drove up for a weekend visit. We knew very quickly that we were meant for one another. So, when a case I was on ended and I found myself needing to find another job, I moved down here to be with him. A few months later, he proposed while we were on a retreat together. We were married in August of 2001. I still consider myself very blessed to have found him.
Tickling is a big part of our life together. We both love it and tickle one another at least a bit several times a day. It's really still a love/hate thing for me. I truly love it but have increasing difficulty in trying not to fight off the ler(s). Until fairly recently, I could hold back reacting pretty well...and enjoyed driving him (and other lers) nuts by doing so. But, it seems that the hormonal changes of perimenopaus is making me even more ticklish and less able to resist. That's cool aside from the fact that I get tired and start hurting much more quickly if I'm free to fight. Bondage is pretty much a must for us to keep Drew from getting hurt and now to keep me from wearing myself out as quickly so we can enjoy it more.
We've made several good friends here in the community. But, we're always open to making more. So, if we don't know you yet and you want to get to know us, feel free to drop us a note. We'd love to hear from you. Just remember that it takes us time to get to know folks. So, patience is appreciated.
I'm sure I've left out plenty here. But, I wrote it up piecemeal in between doing other things. (That's kinda how my online life is lately.) Anyway, if anyone has question or comments, fire away.
[For those who love all those networking sites... I do not accept requests to join new sites. I have a myspace page that I rarely use and will likely be dumping. I don't have time to join several different places. If you want to correspond with me, this is the place to do so.]
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Thanks for the comment. I figure with all the newer folks around that haven't had a chance to get to know me yet, this would help.
Hope to see you at NEST one of these days. We have some unfinished business as I recall. 
