starburstz91
02-07-2009, 11:25 PM
Yo, peeps. Brand new story for you guys, and yes there is quite a bit of my own emotions put into this story. Soo, unless you don't read every single word, you're probably won't understand it. But anyways, try to enjoy it. (: And yes, I know, it needs work.
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Our memories haunted me more than they would ever haunt him. I would spend days, sitting on the bathroom floor, just crying my eyes out. I always would wonder why at the end of any relationship, I would be the one who changed; the one who couldn't move on. Then there he was; happy and had a new chick as an accessory. Why can't I be that? Why did I have to be the one heartless and broken? No matter what, all my fragile strength would be gone, at that moment.
It's been days, but as I felt no surprise, I walked through my hallway as if it were another day. My eyes dreary with sorrow; I opened up the bathroom door. No more crying I would tell myself everyday, just to make myself seem strong. As any person could see, it wasn't working. I glanced to my left, at my own reflection. He entered my mind; raced right through. The hurt was growing stronger; the tears began to drip out like a leaky faucet. I rolled my green eyes as the daily routine was happening again.
Facing the mirror now, I whined in the thought of my lost one. I breathed heavily, tryng to cause myself to stop. Try to think of somethin fun, something nice; something that makes me smile. I finally clenched my eyes shut, facing my face down into the sink, spilling out shrieks and cries of helplessness. Bending over a little bit, I rested in that postition, thinking of him and how pathetic it was for me to start crying again.
Seconds went by; they soon turned into minutes. Minutes turned into bigger minutes, which grew into an hour. My body sunk onto the floor under me, my limp wrists wiping the leftover tears on my cheeks. I glanced in front on me, and then the rest of the white walls around the room. I took a sigh of relief, thanking God that the hurt was over for now. I sat there, thinking to myself about my life and where I've ended up. I had my own place, a job. Life couldn't be all bad. Loneliness can't be so painful.
And yet, the words I tell myself are just part of the routine. I'm sick, I cure myself. It's almost as if it were a common cold; it hits you in different ways, it's hard to treat with the same medicine.
I brushed off the heartbreak and slowly stood myself off from the ground. I rested my palms on the bathroom counter for a few minutes, dragging my head up. Suddenly... I heard something. A pound... a crash? It was so strange that a sudden noise was heard inside my apartment. I slowly took small steps to the bathroom entrance, softly grabbing the doorknob. The eerie of the squeak sound echoed throughout the hallway as I stuck my head out. My eyes were wide open; curiousity was seen clearly.
Bravely, I stepped out of the room, closing the door behind me. I bit my lower lip as I felt my heart pound with nervousness. I looked around my surroundings, catching nothing. It was soundless. I finally decided to walk into different rooms to find out where the sound came from. The first place I checked was the living room. It was common sense for me; certainly someone would rather use the front door than a window.
My eyes gazed upon the living room as I slid my body slowly in it. I look at the familiar sites in front of me. I saw nothing, and heard nothing. I rolled my eyes towards the ceiling, looking upon it. Maybe I wasn't hearing anything, reality wise. Maybe it was nothing, and maybe it was something. Whatever that something was, though, it wasn't here any longer.
Turning around, I suddenly shrieked in surprised. My jaw hung open in horror, my legs automatically walking backwards.
"D- Daniel..." I stuttered softly, almost whispering. "What... what are you doing here?"
My eyes laid across my ex- boyfriend, standing there, almost as surprised as I was. I coudn't believe he was here, in my apartment. It was almost as if the flush of memories came rushing back to me; the demons that were killing me in the first place. He was back, and I couldn't believe it.
"Christy, I really need to talk with you," Daniel said, staring at me. I could tell he was serious; he had that same look in his eyes when he broke up with me.
I took a moment to be in the moment, as I stood there, frozen. I suddenly straightened myself out a little bit, and blink a few times. "What is it?"
"I... I think I ended it too soon..."
"Oh? Now you think that? It's been almost a year, Daniel!"
"Look; I know it has been a very long... and difficult break- up for the both of us, but I've been doing a lot of thinking."
"Oh, well, so have I. Do you know how much hurt you've caused me, Daniel? Do you REALLY know?"
Daniel began to glow a soft shade of pink, glaring at me. "Will you just let me finish, Christy?"
I exhaled, looking angerly at him.
Daniel sighed, taking his eyes off of me and setting them on the ground. "Listen; Like I said before, I've been doing a lot of thinking, and I've realized that I shouldn't have let you go. All the other girls I have been with don't compare to you. There's a piece of me that is... gone ever since we departed. I just... I just think we should try it again. So, Christy, are you willing to take me back?"
My eyes have turned from hatred, to shock. I was surprised at his offer, and I felt as though all the times I've wept over him weren't even worth. We found ourselves just looking at each other, re- visiting the past. This was all I ever wanted, for us to be back together, for me to be happy again. How could I refuse that offer? I started to believe that dreams can possibly come true.
My mind drifted to the day we broke up. The angry outburst he had about my feelings for him, my worriedness of him cheating. He hurt me so badly, that I almost went mad. I know he has a temper, and he can be a real jerk. I told myself over and over again that it is worth getting back together with him. However, that terrible, dreadful day that I still looked upon haunted me, and I didn't want to go through that again. I sighed, drifting my eyes to the right of me. I couldn't look at him.
"Go home, Daniel," I told him, releasing the tension in my fists. "I want you to stay away from me. The past is the past; don't make a future out of it."
The silence was putting great tension in the room. I glanced at him. Daniel was just standing there, staring at me. He was frozen and had this blank expression on his face. Finally, Daniel loosened up a little, and sighed quietly to himself. I did the same, crossing my arms. I studied his eyes as I waited for him to leave. I remembered the same hazel color that used to bring me joy, and I noticed the piercing of loss in his eyes. I missed looking into them, and I knew this would be the last time.
Daniel inahled deeply; exhaled loudly. He stared at me, crossing his arms slowly. His angry expression said enough; he was definately pissed. However, the small smirk appearing on his face slowly and awkwardly opened my eyes a bit; made me think a little.
"I know you miss me. No- no. I know what you miss."
Daniel started to take small steps, walking slowly into my direction. I found myself instantely backing away, in fear of the anticipation. My heart was throbbing; pounding hard against my chest. We stared at each other, watching him becoming closer.. and closer...
The back of my hands touched the wall behind me. I backed my body against it, his face inches away from mine. Daniel's body was pushing up against mine, locking me into the small, yet opened, space. I had to look away from him, but his warm fingertips dug into my cheeks, his hand forcing my head to face his. I didn't even try to pull away; I wanted to hear what he was going to say to me. I want him to think what I have missed; have him look stupid for once. I would love to see his thoughts shattered, even if they were some of the smallest that didn't mean much.
As we stood there for a few seconds, looking at each other, trying to read our minds, he leaned his lips leaned his head into mine. I soon felt the soft touch of his lips against mine. Memories once again flashed into my mind, and I found myself kissing back. I remember how we kissed almost anywhere and everywhere, and I loved the way he tasted.
However, I knew this kiss wasn't for love, but for power. I pushed my head back, as far as it could go, to make Daniel stop. He did, and opened his eyes. He pushed his face against mine again, trying to kiss once more. I clenched my eyes shut. I moved my forearms to his chest, and pushed as hard as I could. To my surprise, he backed away. He was pushed away, by someone like me. I never thought I would touch Daniel like that, and be the least bit of aggressive.
The glare in his eye disturbed me as he started to fight with me, pushing me against the wall again. I started to protect myself, shrieking as I began to push him harder and found myself to be tougher than I actually knew.
"Don't you want to know what you miss, Christy? Don't you, Baby?" Daniel taunted me through his gritted teeth. His upperbody grinding against my left side, pushed up against the wall to hold me still.
I twisted around underneath Daniel, yelling at him to stop. I didn't even notice his voice or cared about what he was telling me. I knew he was wrong. Daniel is always wrong. He doesn't know me; nobody knows me.
"Remember this, Christy?"
The agression of his fingers dug deep into my stomach, right in the center. I felt him squeeze over and over again, causing small shocks and butterflies go through my body. My eyes widened, and my breathing became harder. I tried hard not to show signs of satisfaction, even though we used to do this before. My lower lip would tremble gently, a quick smile would form on my face; I would burst into instant giggles at the smallest touch from him. The ticklish tummy assualt started to erupt into my vocal cord, causing my face to blush softly. I didn't dare move my eyes away from him, to show him I'm not as weak. However, I soon found myself clenching my eyes shut, bending over just a bit, and gritting my teeth to cover the light giggles.
"You didn't think I would forget about how ticklish you are, now did you?" Daniel asked me, moving his hand quicker and stretching his fingers out.
It was hard to believe how vulnerable my stomach was to Daniel. In fact, my whole body was. Even though I thought my tummy was having a bad time already, I soon felt the fingers of Daniel reach onto the left side of my ribcage, that being squeezed and prodded as well. I let out a loud shriek, having myself being unbelievably ticklish. Daniel's index finger found its way in between two ribs, wiggling madly in the soft area. He did that to each one, going up and down, over and over again. The squeezing on my stomach moved to the side, now clawing his hand on my left side.
My giggling was getting harder, my struggling becoming tougher. I felt like a little girl: blushing, screaming, laughing and squirming like crazy. My back was arching more and more and my knees were moving closer together, getting a little weak. I was moving closer to the ground; well, at least trying to. Anything to get away from the tickling.
"I know you love this, Sweetie." The teases were already starting. False ones, but somehow made my skin more sensitive. It was mentally making me weak, making it almost impossible to escape the moment in my mind.
"I remember how I would just tickle you all the time... You could NEVER get away from me. Kind of like now, huh? Huh?"
By this time, I was already sitting on the floor, Daniel still tickling my ribs and stomach. For a minute he finally stop, giving me a few seconds to collect my breath. As I sat there, breathing heavily, Daniel made himself comfortable by spreading his legs apart and sitting on my inner thighs. I started to realize that I was in the steps of becoming helpless and extremely vulnerable. Daniel always did this to me. It was like he tried to force me to like tickling, but it never worked. I always felt weak and embarrassed, wishing I wouldn't have to relive the scene again. I knew for seven months that Daniel liked something about making me laugh physically, buy he never admitted it.
Daniel was moving his hands towards my ribs, slowly, causing the anticipation on my mind and body. I bent my knees softly, wiggling my upperbody from side to side, moving my hands to hug my ribs. I tried my best to keep from Daniel tickling me again.
"Now, sweetie, do I really have to keep those hands away from me?" The maddening nineteen year old asked me, as used his hands to grab both of my arms.
He started to pull them away from my body, carrying them in the air. My eyes shot open, biting my lower lip as I realized what he was going to do. I tried to yank my arms out of his grasp, struggling as much as I could possibly move.
"Noo, noo! Daniel, don't do this!" I screamed at him, as he slammed both of my arms against the wall, my arms now above my head.
Daniel agressively pulled both of my wrists together, and then using one of his huge hands to keep them together. His tightening fingers around both of my wrists completed his accomplishment in making me very vulnerable, and from me to keep my arms at my sides again. I strained the muscles in my arms to pull them down, but it was only tiring me. My eyes opened up, to see what Daniel's next move was. He smirked at me, chuckling softly at my helplessness. My lower lip began to uncontrollably tremble and my face began to blush lightly. I could feel it getting hot, just thinking of how embarassing I must look; just thinking about how helpless I make myself seem. He knew I wasn't strong.
From the corner of my eye, I saw his right hand coming toward me. I instantely watched it, my breathing beginning to heavy on my lungs. Daniel was going straight for my ribs; he knows it's one of my badly sensitive spots. I tried to back into the wall the best I can, kicking my legs behind Daniel. I squirmed my body as I could, hoping to get away from him and his tickles. It was almost impossible, though, for me to get out of my position.
Before I knew it, I began to feel the scratching of his fingertips along my ribcage. I shrieked, arching my back instantely. My eyes clenched tightly shut as the smile began to form on my face. Daniel was going a little rough on me, scratching and stroking along both sides of my rib cages. He was going back and forth, soon prodding at them. Daniel would spread out his fingers in one spot, and bring them all back in, letting me feel the soft touch along my skin, through my shirt. The cloth rubbing against me was terrible torture, and I bursted out laughing.
"Aww, I knooow how ticklish you are here!" Daniel was telling me as I continued to attack my ribs.
After a few tortureous minutes along my ribs, Daniel darted for my tummy again. My body begged to bend over, but the position my arms were in made in extremely difficult. I did, however, bend my head over, facing downwards as I clenched my eyes tightly shut and laughed harder, for there was nothing else I could possible do to escape his strength. The wise fingers were clenching a hold of my sensitive skin, digging deep into the stomach, and squeezing over and over again. The tickling was spreading all around my tummy, paying close attention to the sides and waist line. I was being squeezed over and over again, and each "ha" coming out of my mouth increased louder and harder.. and I couldn't stop it. I was being over- powered, my fragile strength not comparing to his strength.
"Do you know how ticklish your tummy is, Cristy?" The whipser flew through my ear; Daniel's warm breath blowing in my left ear. I moved a little to the right, not helping myself.
I couldn't form words; I was laughing to hard and the tickling was spreading over my brain like frosting on a cake. I couldn't stop anything. Helplessness was over- powering my brain; the swelling pounding in my head.
I stopped pulling on my arms and I stopped moving my body. It was lasting too long, and I barely had any physical strength to even try to make Daniel stop. Daniel, noticing this, reached behind himself and started to scribble on my knees. I didn't want to deal with this anymore. I couldn't handle it anymore. My laughter was becoming silent and my body was becoming more sensitive by the minute. His tickles never got old, and he was in control once again. He squeezed and scribbled and squeezed and scribbled, and just tortured my kneecaps, along with my brain. My anger was building up... my emotional weakness wanted to strengthen... I can feel myself want to explode in screams at the top of my lungs. I wanted to kill myself over the way he was.
Finally, I erupted. Tears were leaking out of my eyes and splashing puddles on my jeans. I wasn't laughing anymore, but whining and shrieking, crying myself out. I didn't even notice that Daniel stopped tickling me, and let my arms slide along the wall. I was sitting there, mad and upset, and fed up with his gravity that he surrounds me with, even when he's not around, and even if I don't want to be near him.
My wet eyes were looking straight ahead, staring at Daniel's chest as I cried. I could feel his eyes glaring at me, and I even heard his heart pound. He slowly moved his neck down, to level faces with me. We forcefullly stared at each other, looking into each other's thoughts. As I cried, he stared, and as I thought of nothing but what has happened to me, Daniel, for the first time, was the one confused.
Danioel stood up, and left after a few minutes of resting on my legs, and trying the think of what the hell I've been feeling. I knew he couldn't know, though. He never fell in love with me, but instead, only fragile strength. I thought I was strong... I thought I could over- power a heart break. But, I was kept, restrained, to him. I drowned in his love, and I didn't know how to sink up, but thankfully brought back to life. I understand how Daniel works; how love works. How my love works.
No more will I weep tears of loss, but will open my eyes to relationships I will encounter, and not be blinded by love.
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Our memories haunted me more than they would ever haunt him. I would spend days, sitting on the bathroom floor, just crying my eyes out. I always would wonder why at the end of any relationship, I would be the one who changed; the one who couldn't move on. Then there he was; happy and had a new chick as an accessory. Why can't I be that? Why did I have to be the one heartless and broken? No matter what, all my fragile strength would be gone, at that moment.
It's been days, but as I felt no surprise, I walked through my hallway as if it were another day. My eyes dreary with sorrow; I opened up the bathroom door. No more crying I would tell myself everyday, just to make myself seem strong. As any person could see, it wasn't working. I glanced to my left, at my own reflection. He entered my mind; raced right through. The hurt was growing stronger; the tears began to drip out like a leaky faucet. I rolled my green eyes as the daily routine was happening again.
Facing the mirror now, I whined in the thought of my lost one. I breathed heavily, tryng to cause myself to stop. Try to think of somethin fun, something nice; something that makes me smile. I finally clenched my eyes shut, facing my face down into the sink, spilling out shrieks and cries of helplessness. Bending over a little bit, I rested in that postition, thinking of him and how pathetic it was for me to start crying again.
Seconds went by; they soon turned into minutes. Minutes turned into bigger minutes, which grew into an hour. My body sunk onto the floor under me, my limp wrists wiping the leftover tears on my cheeks. I glanced in front on me, and then the rest of the white walls around the room. I took a sigh of relief, thanking God that the hurt was over for now. I sat there, thinking to myself about my life and where I've ended up. I had my own place, a job. Life couldn't be all bad. Loneliness can't be so painful.
And yet, the words I tell myself are just part of the routine. I'm sick, I cure myself. It's almost as if it were a common cold; it hits you in different ways, it's hard to treat with the same medicine.
I brushed off the heartbreak and slowly stood myself off from the ground. I rested my palms on the bathroom counter for a few minutes, dragging my head up. Suddenly... I heard something. A pound... a crash? It was so strange that a sudden noise was heard inside my apartment. I slowly took small steps to the bathroom entrance, softly grabbing the doorknob. The eerie of the squeak sound echoed throughout the hallway as I stuck my head out. My eyes were wide open; curiousity was seen clearly.
Bravely, I stepped out of the room, closing the door behind me. I bit my lower lip as I felt my heart pound with nervousness. I looked around my surroundings, catching nothing. It was soundless. I finally decided to walk into different rooms to find out where the sound came from. The first place I checked was the living room. It was common sense for me; certainly someone would rather use the front door than a window.
My eyes gazed upon the living room as I slid my body slowly in it. I look at the familiar sites in front of me. I saw nothing, and heard nothing. I rolled my eyes towards the ceiling, looking upon it. Maybe I wasn't hearing anything, reality wise. Maybe it was nothing, and maybe it was something. Whatever that something was, though, it wasn't here any longer.
Turning around, I suddenly shrieked in surprised. My jaw hung open in horror, my legs automatically walking backwards.
"D- Daniel..." I stuttered softly, almost whispering. "What... what are you doing here?"
My eyes laid across my ex- boyfriend, standing there, almost as surprised as I was. I coudn't believe he was here, in my apartment. It was almost as if the flush of memories came rushing back to me; the demons that were killing me in the first place. He was back, and I couldn't believe it.
"Christy, I really need to talk with you," Daniel said, staring at me. I could tell he was serious; he had that same look in his eyes when he broke up with me.
I took a moment to be in the moment, as I stood there, frozen. I suddenly straightened myself out a little bit, and blink a few times. "What is it?"
"I... I think I ended it too soon..."
"Oh? Now you think that? It's been almost a year, Daniel!"
"Look; I know it has been a very long... and difficult break- up for the both of us, but I've been doing a lot of thinking."
"Oh, well, so have I. Do you know how much hurt you've caused me, Daniel? Do you REALLY know?"
Daniel began to glow a soft shade of pink, glaring at me. "Will you just let me finish, Christy?"
I exhaled, looking angerly at him.
Daniel sighed, taking his eyes off of me and setting them on the ground. "Listen; Like I said before, I've been doing a lot of thinking, and I've realized that I shouldn't have let you go. All the other girls I have been with don't compare to you. There's a piece of me that is... gone ever since we departed. I just... I just think we should try it again. So, Christy, are you willing to take me back?"
My eyes have turned from hatred, to shock. I was surprised at his offer, and I felt as though all the times I've wept over him weren't even worth. We found ourselves just looking at each other, re- visiting the past. This was all I ever wanted, for us to be back together, for me to be happy again. How could I refuse that offer? I started to believe that dreams can possibly come true.
My mind drifted to the day we broke up. The angry outburst he had about my feelings for him, my worriedness of him cheating. He hurt me so badly, that I almost went mad. I know he has a temper, and he can be a real jerk. I told myself over and over again that it is worth getting back together with him. However, that terrible, dreadful day that I still looked upon haunted me, and I didn't want to go through that again. I sighed, drifting my eyes to the right of me. I couldn't look at him.
"Go home, Daniel," I told him, releasing the tension in my fists. "I want you to stay away from me. The past is the past; don't make a future out of it."
The silence was putting great tension in the room. I glanced at him. Daniel was just standing there, staring at me. He was frozen and had this blank expression on his face. Finally, Daniel loosened up a little, and sighed quietly to himself. I did the same, crossing my arms. I studied his eyes as I waited for him to leave. I remembered the same hazel color that used to bring me joy, and I noticed the piercing of loss in his eyes. I missed looking into them, and I knew this would be the last time.
Daniel inahled deeply; exhaled loudly. He stared at me, crossing his arms slowly. His angry expression said enough; he was definately pissed. However, the small smirk appearing on his face slowly and awkwardly opened my eyes a bit; made me think a little.
"I know you miss me. No- no. I know what you miss."
Daniel started to take small steps, walking slowly into my direction. I found myself instantely backing away, in fear of the anticipation. My heart was throbbing; pounding hard against my chest. We stared at each other, watching him becoming closer.. and closer...
The back of my hands touched the wall behind me. I backed my body against it, his face inches away from mine. Daniel's body was pushing up against mine, locking me into the small, yet opened, space. I had to look away from him, but his warm fingertips dug into my cheeks, his hand forcing my head to face his. I didn't even try to pull away; I wanted to hear what he was going to say to me. I want him to think what I have missed; have him look stupid for once. I would love to see his thoughts shattered, even if they were some of the smallest that didn't mean much.
As we stood there for a few seconds, looking at each other, trying to read our minds, he leaned his lips leaned his head into mine. I soon felt the soft touch of his lips against mine. Memories once again flashed into my mind, and I found myself kissing back. I remember how we kissed almost anywhere and everywhere, and I loved the way he tasted.
However, I knew this kiss wasn't for love, but for power. I pushed my head back, as far as it could go, to make Daniel stop. He did, and opened his eyes. He pushed his face against mine again, trying to kiss once more. I clenched my eyes shut. I moved my forearms to his chest, and pushed as hard as I could. To my surprise, he backed away. He was pushed away, by someone like me. I never thought I would touch Daniel like that, and be the least bit of aggressive.
The glare in his eye disturbed me as he started to fight with me, pushing me against the wall again. I started to protect myself, shrieking as I began to push him harder and found myself to be tougher than I actually knew.
"Don't you want to know what you miss, Christy? Don't you, Baby?" Daniel taunted me through his gritted teeth. His upperbody grinding against my left side, pushed up against the wall to hold me still.
I twisted around underneath Daniel, yelling at him to stop. I didn't even notice his voice or cared about what he was telling me. I knew he was wrong. Daniel is always wrong. He doesn't know me; nobody knows me.
"Remember this, Christy?"
The agression of his fingers dug deep into my stomach, right in the center. I felt him squeeze over and over again, causing small shocks and butterflies go through my body. My eyes widened, and my breathing became harder. I tried hard not to show signs of satisfaction, even though we used to do this before. My lower lip would tremble gently, a quick smile would form on my face; I would burst into instant giggles at the smallest touch from him. The ticklish tummy assualt started to erupt into my vocal cord, causing my face to blush softly. I didn't dare move my eyes away from him, to show him I'm not as weak. However, I soon found myself clenching my eyes shut, bending over just a bit, and gritting my teeth to cover the light giggles.
"You didn't think I would forget about how ticklish you are, now did you?" Daniel asked me, moving his hand quicker and stretching his fingers out.
It was hard to believe how vulnerable my stomach was to Daniel. In fact, my whole body was. Even though I thought my tummy was having a bad time already, I soon felt the fingers of Daniel reach onto the left side of my ribcage, that being squeezed and prodded as well. I let out a loud shriek, having myself being unbelievably ticklish. Daniel's index finger found its way in between two ribs, wiggling madly in the soft area. He did that to each one, going up and down, over and over again. The squeezing on my stomach moved to the side, now clawing his hand on my left side.
My giggling was getting harder, my struggling becoming tougher. I felt like a little girl: blushing, screaming, laughing and squirming like crazy. My back was arching more and more and my knees were moving closer together, getting a little weak. I was moving closer to the ground; well, at least trying to. Anything to get away from the tickling.
"I know you love this, Sweetie." The teases were already starting. False ones, but somehow made my skin more sensitive. It was mentally making me weak, making it almost impossible to escape the moment in my mind.
"I remember how I would just tickle you all the time... You could NEVER get away from me. Kind of like now, huh? Huh?"
By this time, I was already sitting on the floor, Daniel still tickling my ribs and stomach. For a minute he finally stop, giving me a few seconds to collect my breath. As I sat there, breathing heavily, Daniel made himself comfortable by spreading his legs apart and sitting on my inner thighs. I started to realize that I was in the steps of becoming helpless and extremely vulnerable. Daniel always did this to me. It was like he tried to force me to like tickling, but it never worked. I always felt weak and embarrassed, wishing I wouldn't have to relive the scene again. I knew for seven months that Daniel liked something about making me laugh physically, buy he never admitted it.
Daniel was moving his hands towards my ribs, slowly, causing the anticipation on my mind and body. I bent my knees softly, wiggling my upperbody from side to side, moving my hands to hug my ribs. I tried my best to keep from Daniel tickling me again.
"Now, sweetie, do I really have to keep those hands away from me?" The maddening nineteen year old asked me, as used his hands to grab both of my arms.
He started to pull them away from my body, carrying them in the air. My eyes shot open, biting my lower lip as I realized what he was going to do. I tried to yank my arms out of his grasp, struggling as much as I could possibly move.
"Noo, noo! Daniel, don't do this!" I screamed at him, as he slammed both of my arms against the wall, my arms now above my head.
Daniel agressively pulled both of my wrists together, and then using one of his huge hands to keep them together. His tightening fingers around both of my wrists completed his accomplishment in making me very vulnerable, and from me to keep my arms at my sides again. I strained the muscles in my arms to pull them down, but it was only tiring me. My eyes opened up, to see what Daniel's next move was. He smirked at me, chuckling softly at my helplessness. My lower lip began to uncontrollably tremble and my face began to blush lightly. I could feel it getting hot, just thinking of how embarassing I must look; just thinking about how helpless I make myself seem. He knew I wasn't strong.
From the corner of my eye, I saw his right hand coming toward me. I instantely watched it, my breathing beginning to heavy on my lungs. Daniel was going straight for my ribs; he knows it's one of my badly sensitive spots. I tried to back into the wall the best I can, kicking my legs behind Daniel. I squirmed my body as I could, hoping to get away from him and his tickles. It was almost impossible, though, for me to get out of my position.
Before I knew it, I began to feel the scratching of his fingertips along my ribcage. I shrieked, arching my back instantely. My eyes clenched tightly shut as the smile began to form on my face. Daniel was going a little rough on me, scratching and stroking along both sides of my rib cages. He was going back and forth, soon prodding at them. Daniel would spread out his fingers in one spot, and bring them all back in, letting me feel the soft touch along my skin, through my shirt. The cloth rubbing against me was terrible torture, and I bursted out laughing.
"Aww, I knooow how ticklish you are here!" Daniel was telling me as I continued to attack my ribs.
After a few tortureous minutes along my ribs, Daniel darted for my tummy again. My body begged to bend over, but the position my arms were in made in extremely difficult. I did, however, bend my head over, facing downwards as I clenched my eyes tightly shut and laughed harder, for there was nothing else I could possible do to escape his strength. The wise fingers were clenching a hold of my sensitive skin, digging deep into the stomach, and squeezing over and over again. The tickling was spreading all around my tummy, paying close attention to the sides and waist line. I was being squeezed over and over again, and each "ha" coming out of my mouth increased louder and harder.. and I couldn't stop it. I was being over- powered, my fragile strength not comparing to his strength.
"Do you know how ticklish your tummy is, Cristy?" The whipser flew through my ear; Daniel's warm breath blowing in my left ear. I moved a little to the right, not helping myself.
I couldn't form words; I was laughing to hard and the tickling was spreading over my brain like frosting on a cake. I couldn't stop anything. Helplessness was over- powering my brain; the swelling pounding in my head.
I stopped pulling on my arms and I stopped moving my body. It was lasting too long, and I barely had any physical strength to even try to make Daniel stop. Daniel, noticing this, reached behind himself and started to scribble on my knees. I didn't want to deal with this anymore. I couldn't handle it anymore. My laughter was becoming silent and my body was becoming more sensitive by the minute. His tickles never got old, and he was in control once again. He squeezed and scribbled and squeezed and scribbled, and just tortured my kneecaps, along with my brain. My anger was building up... my emotional weakness wanted to strengthen... I can feel myself want to explode in screams at the top of my lungs. I wanted to kill myself over the way he was.
Finally, I erupted. Tears were leaking out of my eyes and splashing puddles on my jeans. I wasn't laughing anymore, but whining and shrieking, crying myself out. I didn't even notice that Daniel stopped tickling me, and let my arms slide along the wall. I was sitting there, mad and upset, and fed up with his gravity that he surrounds me with, even when he's not around, and even if I don't want to be near him.
My wet eyes were looking straight ahead, staring at Daniel's chest as I cried. I could feel his eyes glaring at me, and I even heard his heart pound. He slowly moved his neck down, to level faces with me. We forcefullly stared at each other, looking into each other's thoughts. As I cried, he stared, and as I thought of nothing but what has happened to me, Daniel, for the first time, was the one confused.
Danioel stood up, and left after a few minutes of resting on my legs, and trying the think of what the hell I've been feeling. I knew he couldn't know, though. He never fell in love with me, but instead, only fragile strength. I thought I was strong... I thought I could over- power a heart break. But, I was kept, restrained, to him. I drowned in his love, and I didn't know how to sink up, but thankfully brought back to life. I understand how Daniel works; how love works. How my love works.
No more will I weep tears of loss, but will open my eyes to relationships I will encounter, and not be blinded by love.