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Who the one person that knows about your fetish; but you can never have?

the wiz

2nd Level Red Feather
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Don't do it, unless you are OK with what may happen...

She's the only person with which you can discuss your fetish, and to whom you can vent about anything you like. If you tell her what you want to do, she may say that she can't see you anymore.

If you are comfortable with being able to switch therapists if she says no and declines to see you again, then maybe you could ask. However, it may just be not the best idea.

Use this forum to find someone in your area who shares your passion.
 
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Don't think she is doing it on purpose. It's just the way she sits! Not her fault that you are into feet!
 
You are reading your own desires/wants into another persons behavior. No therapist of any standing would play games of the nature you describe using info you provided. It's unethical.

You CAN tell her that the way she sits/dangles makes you uncomfortable and to please stop. She is probably unaware she is causing you issues.

Myriads
 
I want to tickle my therapist

I been seeing my therapist for the last 2 months, she already knows about my tickling and foot passion. She stated she had another client that is into tickling; so, I gave her the website URL. Since then I have notice she always cross her legs in my direction with her foot pointing or dangling toward me.

When I glaze at them she would turn away; just to point them back at me later on. I don’t think she’s into tickling because of how she looks when we talks about it. But, yet it seems (to me) she tempts me every chance she gets. I often wonder how ticklish her feet could be once she pulls off those sensible size 7 shoes she always wears.

How often to you think about tickling someone you know you can never have.



I was wondering what kind of shoes does she wear for you sessions?
Also how do you know she is a size 7?

I think about someone I can never have quite often, but it kind of makes me sad when I do.

Great topic by the way! :3poke:
 
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This thread is like getting a censored letter during a time of war. Sure, it's cool to get one at all, but it's fairly impossible to read.
 
She may be doing it on purpose. There are many forms of psychotherapy that use what's called "transference." That means you "transfer" your feelings for others (repressed or otherwise) onto your therapist. (Transference happens all the time outside the therapeutic setting, but therapists use it as a tool to understand you.) These transferred feelings can include anger, frustration, love, and sexual attraction. Thus, she may be deliberately trying to elicit a sexual response.

You can read more about it here. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Transference
 
She may be doing it on purpose. There are many forms of psychotherapy that use what's called "transference." That means you "transfer" your feelings for others (repressed or otherwise) onto your therapist. (Transference happens all the time outside the therapeutic setting, but therapists use it as a tool to understand you.) These transferred feelings can include anger, frustration, love, and sexual attraction. Thus, she may be deliberately trying to elicit a sexual response.

You can read more about it here. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Transference

The therapist would not be trying to cure the patient of something that he has said he enjoys (He revealed his like of it in answer to her question, "What makes you happy") so there is no reason for her to try and use transference to solve this issue, and even if it were true, a therapist works to NEVER encourage transference to themselves. It's just asking for bigger issues.

So no. Odds are the woman is acting without realizing the effect she is having upon her patient.

And the OP edited his posts there has been NO censorship of this thread by any TMF staff member.

Myriads
 
The therapist would not be trying to cure the patient of something that he has said he enjoys (He revealed his like of it in answer to her question, "What makes you happy") so there is no reason for her to try and use transference to solve this issue, and even if it were true, a therapist works to NEVER encourage transference to themselves. It's just asking for bigger issues.

So no. Odds are the woman is acting without realizing the effect she is having upon her patient.

And the OP edited his posts there has been NO censorship of this thread by any TMF staff member.

Myriads

Some therapists do engage in that practice. Yes, it's risky. But it's really common for people to become attracted to their therapists, or at least identify attributes in their therapists that they see in objects of affection and sexual desire. It happens whether they work toward it or not.

Maybe the dangling is subconscious countertransference!
 
Some therapists do engage in that practice. Yes, it's risky. But it's really common for people to become attracted to their therapists, or at least identify attributes in their therapists that they see in objects of affection and sexual desire. It happens whether they work toward it or not.

Maybe the dangling is subconscious countertransference!

Do you personally know therapists who admit to doing this?? :confused:
 
Yes Transference is common, but legitimate practitioners do not encourage it, and work against it. And once again, the OP was not seeing the person regarding their fetish, it was for unrelated matters. So there would be no reason for the therapist to poke here. It would not be unlike going to the garage for an oil change, and finding they decided to buff out that dent in the fender while they had the car.

When Therapists DO use transference it's something that is upfront in their discussions of how the 'cure' process will work, it's never done 'on the down low'.

I figure the woman's behavior is not purposeful and she is very unaware of how it causes her patient to feel. He'd be best served politely asking her to not do it, and telling her that it causes him distraction from his sessions.

Myriads
 
A co worker

A female co worker years back caught me me looking at her sandaled feet. I wiggled out of it by saying that I liked her toe nail polish. She started asking me once in awhile if I liked her toe nail polish that day. She brought her toes close enough to me that I reached out and touched her toes she pulled away and said she was real ticklish. She once told me where she saw something about men liking feet assuming that I was one of them. Once in the lunch room she took her shoes off and started flexing her bare feet, I almost fainted. Another time I touched her toes she said watch it it tickles , it appears she really had ticklish feet. I would even smell her high heels early in the morning during the winter because she left them there since she wore boots. She moved to another job I still dream of having her tied up me slowly removing her foot wear staring at my object of desire then tickling them non stop kitchy kitchy koo!
 
Do you personally know therapists who admit to doing this?? :confused:

I know one (took a seminar with her) that explained it happens a lot. I don't think she discourages it. It's not a method to "cure" a person of love or fetish or whatever, it's a way of understanding better what they're feeling, rather than have them try to describe it in words.

I told this psychoanalyst about my fetish. But a fetish is only gets "treated" if it's the only way you can experience sexual pleasure. Otherwise it's embraced now. (Like homosexuality, which therapists would-and some still do-try to "cure," but is now considered part of healthy sex life.)

I'm going to be writing a paper on my personal experiences using the texts we read in class. I will probably share most of it with you guys.
 
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Go Pacman!
 
I know one (took a seminar with her) that explained it happens a lot. I don't think she discourages it. It's not a method to "cure" a person of love or fetish or whatever, it's a way of understanding better what they're feeling, rather than have them try to describe it in words.

Why would you make your fetish a topic in therapy if that is not what your problem is? Why does the therapist need to know how you feel about it?

And yes, it happens that patients fall in love with their therapists, and if the therapist realizes that, he/she tells the patient to find another therapist!
 
Why would you make your fetish a topic in therapy if that is not what your problem is? Why does the therapist need to know how you feel about it?

And yes, it happens that patients fall in love with their therapists, and if the therapist realizes that, he/she tells the patient to find another therapist!

One of the purposes of therapy is to tie things together in your life that might seem separate. Sexuality is a big part of the human experience (Freud's contribution was that the sexual experience starts in early childhood. Most people become acquainted with tickling as little kids. It's certainly influenced our sexuality.) Attitudes from and towards one's own sexuality express themselves in other parts of our life. For example, anxiety about sexuality might manifest itself in ways you don't expect. If you're prone to anxiety (a chemical condition), resolving sexual anxieties can go a long way toward functioning better.

I didn't see this therapist as a patient per se, but she taught an academic seminar. I revealed this to her in confidence.

If a patient falls in love with a psychotherapist, the therapist has ways to deal with that. Transference isn't permanent (hopefully). Having a romantic or sexual relationship with a patient is strictly forbidden ethically. If a patient develops romantic and/or sexual feelings for his or her therapist, it's the therapist's job to understand and explain why.
 
IMHO, Freud probably needed a therapy himself more than he was a therapist. :)
 
Why would you make your fetish a topic in therapy if that is not what your problem is? Why does the therapist need to know how you feel about it?

Speaking as someone who's told his therapist about his fetishes, it was done to provide context to difficulties I'd been having in dating. Fetishes do add an additional level of complexity to the topic.
 
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