• The TMF is sponsored by Clips4sale - By supporting them, you're supporting us.
  • >>> If you cannot get into your account email me at [email protected] <<<
    Don't forget to include your username

The TMF is sponsored by:

Clips4Sale Banner

'Ler-bie.

Dawes

TMF Novice
Joined
Jan 15, 2010
Messages
55
Points
0
Okay, so I probably could have come up with some better thread name!

I'm a 'ler. That just hit me a little while ago, when I realized there were titles associated with the practitioner and the receiver; I'm a 'ler, and that puts me in what appears (according my very limited knowledge) to be a very specific role. Responsibilities! A need to learn. A need to provide.

I know next to nothing, but I want to know more. This forum is a font of information, but I'm still just starting to sift through, so I thought I'll present this question:

According to your own personal preferences, what should a 'ler be good at? What should a 'ler focus on, and what should they avoid? What kind of cool things can you do that involve tickling the hell out of the 'lee? Any ideas, suggestions, or references for me as somebody who's just learning and wants to be super open-minded?

I know that the answers to these things vary depending on the 'ler and the 'lee. I know that this post is also immensely ambiguous! At this point, I want to begin gathering as much info as I can so I can break down the specifics and help define my own identity as a 'ler.
 
You should focus on what feels good to your lee, and you should focus on having fun! That's about it! :) The only thing you have to avoid is ignoring the safeword....and you'll be fine. :)
 
I think you'll find a lot of replies here but the answers that will matter will be a joint discovery between you and your partner. You said yourself it varies on the participants and it does. You also said you want to define your identity as a Ler and that's exactly what it is. It's YOUR identity. You should have certain somethings that make you unique, sure, but I believe your identity as a Ler should change in tune to your partner. What works for you with someone may not for another and it's gotta be give and take so if just one person's having a good time, that sucks.

My two cents? Listen to your partner, adapt to how she responds to what makes her and her alone feel good and you should feel just as happy because of it. :)
 
It depends on your lee and a few other things. What it boils down to is that it should be a fun journey. No, it isn't going to be perfect but think of it like sex.....we were all new at some point and got better and more receptive with practice! And it's fun! Communication is a key tool as well. Too much, too little, ooh right there, I like that, etc. Safewords are always good too, esp. when you're just learning about you as a ler and your lee. And just like sex, every partner is different. I think you're be alright my friend. :)
 
The most important thing is communication. Find out what your lee likes and do more of that. Find out what makes your lee uncomfortable or unhappy and cut it out.
 
Thanks, guys!

It's so good to see that communication is pretty much the big thing. I like to think that if there's anything we can really do properly, it's communicate. One of my big things is wanting and needing permission -- I don't want to do anything to her that would ever put her in a position of discomfort or awkwardness. Granted, I think that poses some potential "problems" in the future, because the element of surprise is a very big factor. I suppose that's where the communication will be key. I have to know well enough beforehand that, even when I take her by surprise, I'm implementing a safe and desired action.

Also -- and I think this is a natural comfort reaction for me, being new to this -- I find that I naturally focus on one particular ticklish spot on the body. While I'm slowly exploring with new places, I know there's always this fallback area. Have you guys ever experienced boredom ("Oh, there he goes again, tickling that same spot!") if a 'ler regularly goes back to that Old Reliable Place?
 
You should focus on what feels good to your lee, and you should focus on having fun! That's about it! The only thing you have to avoid is ignoring the safeword....and you'll be fine.

yes, that sums it up :)
 
The only thing you have to avoid is ignoring the safeword....and you'll be fine. :)

These are wise words. I suppose I should devise a safe word, shouldn't I, if I don't want to die. ;)

I don't think I should be posting on this thread, because in the end, it's about Dawes and myself. However, I'll say this, because I imagine other people might read this one day other than myself:

Don't be afraid of screwing up. When you have a trusting, openly communicative relationship, there's nothing you can truly do wrong. You want to try something new? Go for it! If I don't like it, I'll tell you. I'm not going to leave the bedroom going, "That was terrible. I don't think I want to share this any longer."

Someone else said it here (I'm sorry I forget who right now!) that we all are newbies at some point. So don't be afraid. Experiment. Try. And keep talking before, during and after. :)
 
Door 44 Productions
What's New

3/28/2024
Stop by the TMF Welcome Forum and take a second to say hello!
Tickle Experiment
Door 44
NEST 2024
Register here
The world's largest online clip store
Live Camgirls!
Live Camgirls
Streaming Videos
Pic of the Week
Pic of the Week
Congratulations to
*** brad1701 ***
The winner of our weekly Trivia, held every Sunday night at 11PM EST in our Chat Room
Back
Top