If that was your first attempt at writing a story, it was a pretty good one! I've worked as a part time journalist and editor, and I can tell you that you definitely have potential as a writer. Keep writing!
nice story man featuring Indian names feels good and an Indian lady who is 5'6'' must'nt have complex at all the average height of Indian women is barely 5'
id write another story, but just dont have the motivation to use these characters. ill get down to it if youd like me to, but i was thinking of a college girl gang tickling story. i can do both though