Miss Sassy
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Ticklopolis -Prologue-
- Thread starter Miss Sassy
- Start date
Marquis De Sade
1st Level Blue Feather
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Seems like a rather unique idea but...I really don't understand the need for the celebrities. Yet. Will this be cleared up later? I don't get it.
Unless you're inserting them in the story for personal reasons, as mentioned IN the story itself...
Also, if this is some alternate reality, perhaps mention why the Twin Towers still stand. Or if possible, change the location altogether. As a side note, the Twin Towers might be a touchy subject for some here (The General Discussion board you see here today is a result of that event), New Yorkers in particular, and it might take them out of the story and...someplace else. Someplace probably not very happy.
Just a suggestion.
As for the writing itself, I like your narrative. It's easy, conversational, lil' witty and fun.
Kudos for posting your first btw.
Unless you're inserting them in the story for personal reasons, as mentioned IN the story itself...
Also, if this is some alternate reality, perhaps mention why the Twin Towers still stand. Or if possible, change the location altogether. As a side note, the Twin Towers might be a touchy subject for some here (The General Discussion board you see here today is a result of that event), New Yorkers in particular, and it might take them out of the story and...someplace else. Someplace probably not very happy.
Just a suggestion.
As for the writing itself, I like your narrative. It's easy, conversational, lil' witty and fun.
Kudos for posting your first btw.
LvsTicklingFeet
TMF Expert
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So far so good. I am very interested to see how this whole story plays out
Miss Sassy
TMF Expert
- Joined
- Mar 20, 2010
- Messages
- 364
- Points
- 16
Seems like a rather unique idea but...I really don't understand the need for the celebrities. Yet. Will this be cleared up later? I don't get it.
Unless you're inserting them in the story for personal reasons, as mentioned IN the story itself...
Also, if this is some alternate reality, perhaps mention why the Twin Towers still stand. Or if possible, change the location altogether. As a side note, the Twin Towers might be a touchy subject for some here (The General Discussion board you see here today is a result of that event), New Yorkers in particular, and it might take them out of the story and...someplace else. Someplace probably not very happy.
Just a suggestion.
As for the writing itself, I like your narrative. It's easy, conversational, lil' witty and fun.
Kudos for posting your first btw.
Thanks for the advice Marquis (sp?). Ok, I've changed the place and the names of the predators or whatever you call them. What do you guys think of this story now? Oh, I'm still taking suggestions. I need some names to use for the anti-crusaders if you guys are interested.
Miss Sassy
TMF Expert
- Joined
- Mar 20, 2010
- Messages
- 364
- Points
- 16
Hmm, thanks Audrey. I think I might revise the stories....just don't know when -_- haven't had any muse lately, lol.
