Again, really nice work. I like your style. It's clean and simple, easy to understand and you build clearly from start to finish very well. You also have a knack for making it all seem really natural and playful, which is refreshing.
Do you all want me to update this story? I don't want to do it if no one is going to read it. Also, is there anything you would like me to add/remove/change from the story? Criticism is welcome though flaming will be ignored.