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tactillianlover

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About a week ago, I was in a secluded area of the everglades amongst the alligators and snakes and mosquitoes. I was aranging a fire before dark and planning my yearly homage to the dead ceramony
as various indian tribes had done here for centuries.

After dark, I painted my body and began chanting old calusa
incantations to let the spirits know of my homage to them. But this
would be one of those strange nights to remember.Suddenly, seriously
strange...

I had my eyes closed at this point, just listening to the howl of the wind and whatever was carried in it. When I realized I was listening to a strange low pithed whirring sound it was already too late... a powerful blue light lit everything in sight! I immediately
new it was something abnormal- whether humans or aliens, the craft
hovering over me was definetly unidentified! I was moore startled than frightened. Probably because after a few hours of trancing, my
mind was clear, senses excellent. I assumed the worst and thought
that most important was to remember to keep breathing calmly.

I had often pondered just what I might do if aliens should ever
abduct me. Hey, always be prepared. The 'ship' hovered thirty or fourty feet above me and it was hard to tell the size because of the trees around me. A hundred feet across, I'd guess. I was caught in
some sort of tractor beam and I slowly floated up towards the ship
slowly. As I was about ten feet away I could sort of see a portal
at the end of the blue light. Here we go...

If the countless tales of alien abduction taught me anything it
was that almost immediately I would be physically helpless, not unlike a dear staring at a car's headlights. Next these aliens would
supposidly talk to me with their minds, hopefully in english...

I recalled my silly plan and made myself believe it...

When I saw the four or five aliens, fire burned up my spine.
I smiled at them on purpose. The kind of smile a movie hero would
smile right before he destroyed his enemies and himself in the
process! I was concentrating so hard I barely noticed the long fingered hands grasping my arms at either side.

I mentally heard one of these big eyed, big headed suckers speak.
"Do not be afraid... no harm will come to you." "Bring him to the lab." They started walking me foward and I had no resistance.

"Wait!!" "This one is dangerous!!!" "He has some sort of exploding
mechanism in his being!!!" "It will detonate as a result of mental anguish!!!" They released my arms in confusion.

"That's right, pal!" Wow! I could still speak aloud.




Don't bother comenting folks. I've a long ways to go! To be continued...
 
Imagining I had an explosive device and the power to destroy everyone worked. I figured if they were really smart then they wouldn't be wasting their time abducting yet another human.

"Release the specimen" said the bossy one.

"Why?" I asked. "You are of no use to us now." he said, flatly.

"How do you know?" "Perhaps if you spent a little more time communicating when you snatch people up, you would learn something!"

Silence... they did not know what to make of my statement.

" Tell me, you abduct us and do extensive tests on us, but what
do you offer in return?"

"In return?" one of them queeried.

"Yes, what's the trade off?!"

Again, silence.

"Nevermind!" "You foreigners don't want to learn anything new-
your right! Let the specimen go!" I stated with mock disgust.

" Wait! I wish to comprehend the trade off!" 0ne of the females thought.

" Do not speak out of turn!" said the bossy guy.

" I am bored to fatigue!I wish to comprehend the trade off!"
snapped the female.


"Well you go around scaring people with your probes and mindgames
but it never occurs to you to do something that gives us pleasure."

"Example?" The female thought. I had their undivided attention.

"Well... You could throw a party. Money's always pleasant. Give
a nice back rub-I mean your always feeling us up anyway- break out
with a back rub for crying out loud! People enjoy being touched in
many pleasant and exciting ways!"

"That's when I threw it on the table. "Tickling is exciting!"

"What is this...tickling?" asked another female.

" What is tickling?!" I smirked. "Who 'are' you people?

"Listen, I have to get back to my sacred ceromony." "Are you kids
going to be on earth a few more days?"

" It is certain" thought the bossy guy.

" Good. Meet me back here in five days and I will have a dialog with you and I will show you the art of tickling. And don't go scaring the natives until then. Okay?"

They agreed. Two minutes later I was back to giving homage to the dead...
 
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