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Punished Student Advisor (FF/F Tickling & Adult Content) Feel Free To Comment

woooooooooooow ... it's great. but it more terrific if it become 3rd person POV story eheheheh

but this one is the besssttt
 
Not bad, not bad at all, though I have a couple critiques. Don't take them personally; I'm a writer too and I'm only trying to help.

As others have stated, this might have played better as a 3rd person POV rather than a 1st person, though it's fine the way it is. My biggest issue is the run-on sentences and punctuation errors throughout. That has nothing to do with the quality of your writing (which is quite good), but more the quality of your editing and proofreading. A little bit of polish will turn your stories from merely good to great, and I'm personally looking forward to more!

Thanks for an enjoyable story, and hope my comments don't annoy you too much.
 
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