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Laugher Says Goodbye

The_Laugher

TMF Expert
Joined
Aug 4, 2001
Messages
502
Points
16
Hello To All My Tickling Friends,

This letter is very hard for me to write. Many of you by now have noticed that my site is gone. The reason is that after 16 years of maggage, my wife is becomming really upset by my activities in tickling. All these years I was under the impression she was OK with it but she said that it has always bothered her but she didn't want to be the kind of wife to restrict me and hold me back.

This was quite a shock but the bottom line is I have to abandon all my tickling activities and work on repairing my relationship with her. Family comes first.

This was a very hard decesion to make. I have turned over all my information to the 2 remaining buddies of mine at TK3 and I think they will be setting up a new site and carrying on with more videos. They will most likely also continue with the Motown Tickling Parties. So keep watching for announcements.

To all my friends and customers who have supported me since I opened the site in 1996, Thank You So Much.

To everyone in the community, I will miss you all and wish you all the best in life and much happiness.

Your Friend In Tickling,

The Laugher
 
The Laugher,

I am sorry to see you leave, though we have talked a few times..You
will be missed trust me!!...by me and also by others I am sure..
I wish you all the best,happiness and my sympathies go out to you as well...
I myself am going through transition but seperating from my hubby after 6 years because he doesn;t understand the yearning,craving I
have to be tickled,..We do have love but I guess thinking more about
it ,sometimes love may not be enough..
 
Very,very sad to hear that you're leaving the tickling culture,Laugher,for you've done a lot for the tickling community with your parties and videos,as well as with your sadly gone site.

Always remember all of your friends(who you've helped widely open the doors for) here whenever you think about the tickling times,because we'll always be thinking about you.

:( :( :( :( So long,Laugher,for you'll be highly missed here(and in the tickling community).
 
You'd think she'd have gotten a clue by year 12 or something....
 
Yeah i'm sorry to hear that The Laugher. hope everything goes well for you in the near further and that God blesses your Life big time.

Take Care
 
soory to see you go, but...

this abso-freaking-lutely sucks!
folks, why is it, that it is us tickle lovers that have to change, or give up our sport?
why is it the folks we marry can't get it through their narrow minded heads that this isn't a "phase" or "passing fancy".
laugher, no offense mant to you, and yes there are times when marriage comes first, but you seem to be totally caving in. so i take it you are no longer going to be a tickphile ,huh? sad, truely sad...

steve
 
Laugher's statement that family comes first is correct, IMO. Tickling is only one aspect of our lives...however ingrained it may be. There IS more to life than what we do here. This just happens to be more fun than most things.

I wish you all the best, Laugher. You'll be missed.

Ann
 
You have been around for a long time Laughter...best of luck with your family!
Hopefully we will see you again.
 
TklDuo-Ann said:
Laugher's statement that family comes first is correct, IMO. Tickling is only one aspect of our lives...however ingrained it may be. There IS more to life than what we do here. This just happens to be more fun than most things.

I wish you all the best, Laugher. You'll be missed.

Ann

ann, that's easy to say when YOUR spouse is a fellow tickphile!
laugher also said it was over his tickle activities. see, he's expected to change. that is why i posted my earlier response.
people are unrealistic in their expectations. his wife should have spoken up earlier, or better yet learn to love it her self!

steve
 
Goodbye Laugher!

Good Luck and God speed.

I've been in your shoes and the family always comes first! Be well.

~ toyou
 
TklDuo-Ann said:
Tickling is only one aspect of our lives... There IS more to life than what we do here.
Ann

so true. a sobering thought for most of us including me.
 
It is unfortunate....

That those of us who enjoy things that are not deemed "normal" by most people's standards, must "change" or give it up, because those we are with don't like it, or it's weird, or whatever.

My ex-wife, when we had first met, allowed me to indulge in my tickling, and never had any qualms whatsoever about it...after a few years of marriage, she pretty much did her best to "break me" of my love and passion for tickling....

Well, for that and many other reasons, THANK GOD we divorced and I had moved on, and found the PERFECT woman in Meems....

Beauty, brains, brawn, and tickling....

She WOULD NOT make me change anything; she loves me for me, and I her for her....

It is unfortunate that there are those who are all too willing to give up what they love or enjoy, because of another person's opinion....

I am not flaming, just stating an honest opinion....

I wish we could live in a world where everyone could accept everyone for who they are, and we all loved what we loved, without fear of rejection or fear of what others think....

'Nuff said.
 
areenactor said:
ann, that's easy to say when YOUR spouse is a fellow tickphile!

Yes, Steve, Drew IS a fellow tickle lover. But, that doesn't change the facts. If we based our relationship purely on the physical (tickling or otherwise) we would likely not have one at all. Believe it or not, there ARE things related to this that we don't agree on and have learned to compromise about. It's not that big a deal because that's not all that we're about. No matter how much import people put on that stuff, there truly IS more to life. I personally choose to live a full life rather than a one-sided and potentially selfish one. If there's something wrong with that, oh well. I guess I'll just have to live with it. :p

Ann
 
Laugher

I wish both you and your wife nothing but the Best luck in repairing your relatiohship! I am sure by your actions and attitude, that all will work out just fine. You are doing the right thing here bro and what you have done for the community has been appreciated. Be well be safe be happy! That is all that really matters.
Family DOES come frist.
Amazing and unfortunat that it took her 16 years to tell you. Good luck and take care.

TTD
 
hope all works out for you Laugher,,,

what's the ol saying,,, "women... can't live with em,,can't,,,,damn I can never remember the last part of that saying:)
 
Re: soory to see you go, but...

areenactor said:
this abso-freaking-lutely sucks!
folks, why is it, that it is us tickle lovers that have to change, or give up our sport?

steve

Praise Jehovah someone brought this up. A family member betrayed you! She gave you a false sense of security in your life. Made you feel like you were accepted as you are - for a LONG time - and then after a big chunk of your lives spent together, demands that you A.) change, and B.) leave your old friends behind. Knowing all along who you were, and, quite frankly, while you were giving joy to the planet and giving people a place to go who had no other place for them to be themselves. That's not a family situation worth saving. No doubt there were good times, but can't see how this should be saved. Other members of this board have gone through this same thing. It NEVER turns out well and gets "saved".
 
good luck

I don't envy Laugher, and I wish him well.

In my case, tickling and women's feet aren't something I do as a hobby (like building model airplanes or collecting stamps)... it's an integral part of who I am.

I could never share a meaningful relationship with any woman who couldn't accept my passions for feet and tickling. It simply wouldn't be worth it -- at least not for me.

For the moment, I'm living in a sparsely populated area where social opportunities are few. However, the last time I was in a socially active community, I always made sure anyone I dated knew my preferences early on.

Again, my best to Laugher.
 
Relationships and tickling....

I've been in a relationship for 15 years, and only "came out" to my partner about my tickling obsession about 2 years ago. (The circumstances were unusual: I had just had a novel about tickling accepted for publication.)

My partner is a kind and understanding person with an open mind. He "accepts" my tickling fetish without really understanding it. He has worked some tickling into our lovemaking activities (I'm a lee) and I really appreciate it.

At the same time, I feel I have to have some tickling experiences outside of the relationship, with others who are as much into tickling as I am. He was a bit shocked when I told him, this spring, that I wanted to go to the Midwest Regional Ticklefest in Chicago. But he did not complain, and I went. It was the first time in several years that I had taken a trip by myself.

Now I'm actually going to be giving a talk on tickling, and a "demo," at an S&M gathering next month. Again my partner is doing his best to wrap his mind around that fact.

HOWEVER, I am very conscious that my partner, like the Laugher's spouse, might "pull the plug" on my tickling activities at any time. He could say, "Wayne, stop it. All of it. Right now." And I don't know if I could do it.

What I really want--perhaps what we all really want--is someone who loves ALL of me. I can't stand the feeling that I'm being "tolerated" or "put up with."

That's all I want to say. I'm sorry I'm not making more of a point here. I wish I were less confused about tickling and relationships and what either partner has to "put up with."
 
I think Laugher is doing the right thing.

To think that his wife is doing him ill is ludicrous. It could be that she married him and after finding out about his kink, she did her best to make it hers too. No one can say what goes on in the mind and heart of another person. After all, she did let it go on for 16 years! SIXTEEN YEARS of watching her partner in life do something that she didn't understand, and yet loved him in spite of it. THAT says something.

Let's give her the benefit of the doubt and assume that she really DOES love her husband, and respects him, and TRIED to understand. Then, let's assume that tickling and all that goes with it is something that she just cannot embrace, yet she sees her husband filling his life with it.

Hmmm...I'd dare say that she might be feeling a bit like a failure herself. She may very well be scared to death that she may soon lose her love if she can't "come around" to his ways. She may think that it's plain idiocy that TICKLING would threaten their marriage. Good lord, what if she were in a horrible car crash and lost mobility!! I suppose if she embraced tickling and THAT happened, her marriage would be over too.

To think that someone's sexuality should carry such weight in a relationship is devastatingly sad. It is a huge part...but sheesh. C'mon! Let's see how many of you feel this way when old age, or poor health hit and you have ZERO sex drive or desire to tickle.

If Laugher is willing to say, "If it hurts her that much, I can do without it," I say it's a bold move. That is called sacrificing for love. I'd like to think that she was doing the same for him all those years. If only everyone were so lucky.

Good luck, Laugher. It sounds like you have a good foundation, so keep that structure of your marriage strong. It's obvious that you love you wife and are committed to doing whatever it takes to make things work. I'm sure she sees and appreciates that. I wish you a happy future whatever path it takes.

Jo
 
jobelle this is the first time i disagree with you.

i'm suprised too, you're always so insightfull.
ah well, back to the topic. i am going to go on record here, i am predicting that the laughers marriage doesn't last. he'll give up tickling, and it still won't be enoght to save the marriage. i received a flash of inspiration, she's upset about something else, and just picked tickling to fight about, and demand he give up, to punish him. she knows this will be hard, and will hurt him.

in the end, she's still going to leave him, and he'll be bitter, confused, and lonely. ontop of it all, he'll have the guilt that he betrade himself.

steve
 
Re: jobelle this is the first time i disagree with you.

areenactor said:
in the end, she's still going to leave him, and he'll be bitter, confused, and lonely. ontop of it all, he'll have the guilt that he betrade himself.

Wow, Steve. I'm so glad to see that you have such faith in the man's choice to try to stay with his family and wife and to do something unselfish in order to make it happen.:rolleyes: At least HE seems to think marriage and family are worthy of effort.

If she were the "bitch from hell" that you've assumed her to be, then I would think that sometime in the past sixteen years, that she would have nagged and threatened him to get out the tickling world.

This community is so full of whiners! What makes you think that you don't have to sacrifice for a marriage? Why is it that your partner HAS to love tickling to prove they love you and support you??!?! There are plenty of couples on this planet who have what they consider to be a seuxally deviant partner. If you marry someone fully knowing that they do not feel the same way about your kink, then YOU are to blame...not your partner. You're expecting them to become something you aren't as well! What non-tker on the planet thinks to themselves, "Gee, I sure hope he doesn't love tickling enough to put our marriage in jeopardy over it!" MORONIC!!! Other people don't "get it." It doesn't register. How can that be so easily forgotten? No wonder so many people come onto this site crying and whining about how lonely they are.

You have choices in life...one of them could be to put your needs and desires behind you for a while to see life through your partners eyes. If you're nto willing to do that...then you're not a partner worth having. Seems to me, 16 years is a long time to watch someone you love do something erotic and seuxal that you don't understand. That takes a lot of trust and a lot of hope. Minimizing that is something that I can't understand a person doing.

Jo
 
I wish you well Laughter as I've seen your stuff through the years and you will be missed here. I've never written with you or been in conversation with you but you were definately known in this "small" community. :)

Family is first, tickling will always be about but sometimes you only get the love of your life once. Be happy my friend.

DK
 
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