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Advice on bringing tickling into a relationship.

Psycho

TMF Expert
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Mar 1, 2003
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I met this girl last November and we started out as friends and gradually moved into a more ummmm...close relationship. Anyways I would like to tickle her or for her to tickle me or both, but how do I bring that up. I mean i dont know if she would be into it or not or anything. Advice please. If I never get to tickle her its ok becuase I think I love her, but it would be some extra icing on the cake.

Psycho
 
If you have a good relationship where communication is solid, talk about it. Explain why you like it, and stress that it's something that is a bonus to you, and not the object of an encounter.

Basically be honest.

Myriads
 
no worries..

Hey Psycho,
I had the same exact problem the first time I had my first serious relationship. I don't know how long you been going out with her but it sounds like to me that you have a pretty good thing going and I'm sure by this point you have a lot of trust for one another. I'm sure you have exchanged a lot of secerts with each other by now. Even though to you this may seem like the biggest most darkest evil thing in the world (that's how I felt) most girls really don't think that much of it, and trust me if she really likes you like the way it sounds like she does, it will not be a problem at all. Like just mention it to her casually and just tell her about it little bit at a time. Even though she may never like tickling the way we like it, you would be suprised to how accepting girls can be with this sort of thing. When I told my first girlfriend who was pretty conservative and stuff, she had no problem with it at all and she would let me tickle her quite often even though she was really ticklish and didn't exaclty love to be tickled. So just give it a shot! I'm positive she won't think less of you...
-Chris
 
It sounds like you have a good thing going with this girl and if you have exchanged secrets it sounds like there has been alot of trust built. The tickling is part of who you are and what makes you tick. It's important to tell her early on so everything is out in the open. As far as her reaction, I wouldn't worry about it too much.
 
I think you should tell her, I doubt you have anything to worry about she would more than likely except it as a part of you and as apart of the person she likes so much, good luck though...I bit the bullet and told my boyfriend who is now my fiancee and now apart of this forum, i was scared but i knew if he liked me for me he had to like everything about me and i couldnt keep a big secret like that from him
 
Hi. For what it's worth, my suggestion is to be straightforward and polite. In a good, trusting relationship, you shouldn't have to be afraid of suggesting something relatively innocent like tickling. And, if you're honest about it and respectful in the way the tickling is expressed, I bet it'll go over well.

In my case, I eventually just told my wife that I found it sexually stimulating. She is extremely ticklish and I wouldn't say particularly likes being tickled, but if I just do it a little and stop (more or less) when she asks, it goes over pretty well. She's even had some bad tickling experiences (not from me), and can tolerate it, so I think this is a good approach.

Heck, I just got a good round of belly, side and foot tickling in this morning!

Good luck!
 
Thanx yall. Ill bring it up one day and see how it goes. Ill let yall know. LOL, hey is this is the first time five people on the TMF have agreed on something.:D :D .

Psycho
 
the bottom line is tell her the truth and see what happens, if you both truly like each other then there wont be any problems. Sinner told me about her likes and then she showed me the site.
 
personally, id never get into a serious relationship with a girl unless i knew ahead of time if she was ok with tickling. but how do you find that out? thats the hard part!
 
Sometimes the simple and common sense answers are the hardest for some folks.

I simply told my husband one day, "You know I REALLY like tickling." His response was "Well, DUH?" We'd been tickling since our first few dates, just never talked about it. Sometimes the WORDS are the hard part. Nothing changed...we tickled just as much as before, but now there became the spoken knowledge that it was a true kink, not just a silly discovery we stumbled into.

I'd say....just tell her and see how she repsonds. What's the worst that can happen?

Not like your spleen will shut down. :p
Jo
 
Well, Psycho...Have you ever tickled her?
How does she react to that?
Make your feelings known! It can be awkward at first but just get it out...esp. if you explain it is simply a part of you, not all of you!

Best of luck!
 
the bottom line is tell her the truth and see what happens, if you both truly like each other then there wont be any problems.


I have to agree.. the best way is to go out on a limb.. but as ive said in another post, you have nothing to be ashamed of.. its just the same as telling your partner of more 'mainstream' likes.

You dont need to make a big deal out of it.. even if it feels like it.

My partner.. bless his socks :) took 2yrs to tell me.. and although it was.. unusual if only slightly.. it wasnt a problem for me.. until he fixated on that and the sex wasnt happening :p but.. that was only related to it in the fact.. that.. he'd found someone who was fine with his fetish :)
 
skip all that wait wait wait bullshit. im a girl so i know how we think. if we like a guy enough we like them no matter what. after a date sit down and tell her either shell leave your or she wont. and if you care about her too much dont tell her at all:)
 
LOL f/f you do know how to crush someones spirit dont you. Shell leave you or she wont. Anyways I was thinking about it and JoBelle is right. The worst case is that she isnt into it and we dont ever do it, and even that is unlikely.

No Tommy I haven't ever tickled her in any way.

I have only seen her once since I started this thread because we have both been very busy. I have talked to her every day though. I think maybe the next time that I see her I will tell her. Unless I lose all my balls going in. She has said something about using handcuffs during sex so she probably has some freak in her. I don't think it will bother her at all. Thank you for all of your support.

BTW Jester, you Sinner's hubby?

Psycho
 
Thank you all for your advice. Today me and Liza where sitting on the couch. (I just realized I didn't tell you her name when I first posted its Elizabeth, but everyone calls her Liza) Anyways I asked if she would mind if I tickled her during well....you know...whatever. She smiled and said oh I guess you have some freek in you too. It was so simple. I can't believe I made such a big deal about it.

Psycho
 
On my first date with my current girlfriend I told her I enjoy tickling as part of sexual foreplay. She looked at me strange for a second. Then she jumped on her bed and took off tennis shoes. Exposing her tenderly soft soles for me to tickle and lick, the rest is history.
 
One of the things I found to be such a gift in these on-line tickle fora is how common our experiences sometimes are. That said, I may be the worst of them all in suggesting how to introduce tickling into a relationship.

I've concluded in just the last couple of years that I could never have had a long term relationship with any woman unless she would at least allow me to indulge my passion for tickling even if it were not her favorite activity. Yet I can't say out loud anything with the word "tickle" in it if there is another human within hearing distance. I bet you could count on one hand the number of times I've said the word "tickle" even to my own tickle babe. The very thought of it (unless I sneak up on it) causes my tongue to go berserk. It just won't work. So I could never expalin it to a woman.

So, for me, the only thing that ever worked was simply to tickle whenever the context is right. I think over the years our (my) main boy-girl passtime for the evening has been dinner and a movie. Yet, we (I've) done lots of other stuff as well. My favorite sport is baseball and we've been to many many baseball games. We've been on bike hikes, camping trips, basketball games, drives in the country. We have tried to play tennis together and have bowled often. I love archeological and science museums and even occasionally go dancing although I may be the worst dancer in North America. I've tickled the wife to death perhaps a thousand times.

There may not be much in life more rewarding than getting to know, really know, another person. I found that when we do stuff together, there was always time for tickling. For one of we tickle people, it must start with that glorious tiny rib tickle while standing in line somewhere, or that pinch of the knee while waiting at a red light or that foot tickle while lying in the sun at the beach. From there it WILL escalate.

It has been my experience that women aren't as dumb as I look most of the time, and JoBelle I can surely relate to your tickle partner's eloquence. I carry my own personal "pop-up" wherever I go. Once we were sitting about our den, dressed down to the occasion, and I was painting the wife's toe nails, bright red of course. She started to giggle and said, "You have a foot fetish, don't you?" I'm sure I started to stutter and stammer and my ears started to burn. I managed to say, "Actually, I have sort of a tickle fetish." She replied, and I quote, "Duh!"

I will never be able to use the word "tickle" in public.
 
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