Disclaimer for those with no sense of humor: This is a satire of a certain tendency among people about a certain cultural taboo. All this election stuff has me in a fevered political mood. The story is actually of a fairly intense nature, I know you shouldn’t apologize or explain a joke in advance, but I know how touchy some people can be so I thought this might avoid some hard feelings. If you don’t like that kind of thing, don’t read anymore. Otherwise enjoy some non-consensual (and intense) M/F tickling, and comments are completely welcome. And remember, everything in here is ment to be funny PLEASE don’t be offended, its just a joke.
PS: I am not trying to criticize the moderators. Just the culture that creates the laws. Hope you enjoy. (Also a little inspired by Kloey from Tickle Central, and obviously the recent MK&A celeb stories)
Eighteen and One Minute
He sat in the darkness, the glow of a cigarette all that illuminated his face. He had not been this ready for anything since he was a schoolboy, and it had been awhile. He had almost made a fatal mistake, he had tried to get inside five minutes earlier… his watch was five minutes fast. Almost such a huge mistake. Thank God he saw the clock on the wall before it was too late. Now the time had come. He moved into the bedroom and surveyed the reward of his patience.
She was so beautiful laying there, her long hair across her pillow, silk skin caressed by satin sheets. She was the kind of beauty that filled a mans dreams, that filled his mind day in and day out. As he leaned down with the rope he smelled the soft scent of strawberry body wash and shampoo, and in that single moment he was happy. She let out a scream as he took hold of her, and fought violently out of her slumber, but the fight was short lived, and in few moments she laid tied to her bed completely awake and eyes filled with abject fear.
“Wh… what are you doing here?” She ask he lips slightly quavering as she tried to gain control of her fear.
A slow smile made its way over his lips. “Well, Its your birthday. I’ve waited so long for this day… the day I could torture you to my hearts content. Have my way with you in any way I pleased.”
She looked back at him now almost as confused as she was afraid, “On my birthday, I mean don’t you think that’s kinnda mean?”
He shook his head in frustration, “You don’t understand. Five minutes ago you were a sweet precious child, protected from the sexual gaze of men and there heinous but now… now your fully a woman. I saw you a while back and I wanted to approach you, but obviously I couldn’t do that. I mean it would have been a terrible crime against nature… a man, trying to have a real relationship with a child of only 17 years and 11 months. What an atrocity it would have been. So I decided to go this route instead.”
“But… this is kidnapping…” Her senece cut short as he ran a finger down the smooth hollow of her armpit. Her whole body spazamed against the tight bondage that held her in place. “Oh no. no no no no no…. I am SO ticklish, you absolutely cant do that. I mean that’s torture. Your obviously a guy with some morals, all worried about me being 18... You don’t wanna resort to kidnapping AND torture.”
He scoffed with a sadistic smile, “Oh that’s where your wrong…were in the internet world. That means that torture, kidnapping… heck even brutal rape (though not my torment of choice) are completely acceptable. Just be sure its not before they are 18. I mean would you want to see our nice story followed by hundreds of flames reading something like “I have kids, and you’re an abomination… just for thinking about kids id wanna kill you KILL YOU.” cause killing is also acceptable because the author of the story is also over 18. Or even worse, you and I are both wiped out of existence by a righteous mod who wants to protect people from that kind of abhorrent filth”
“But.. But…” She relxed slightly as the obvious infallibility of this powerful moral argument sank in. “I guess your riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii” again her sentence trailed into an incomprehensible squeal as fingers dug into her ribcage thrashing side to side in helpless agony. “no more please…. Please”
He was relentless in his torture. Her body shaking violently anything to avoid the tickling. The sounds of her sweet laughter filling the room. “It is a shame… I really was just going to ask you out but I didn’t wanna corrupt innocence of course.”
She looked up at him her hair matted to her face from laughing and struggling.. Her face full of indignation “Look buddy, this is America, I’ve been sexually active for 3 YEARS.”
“but you weren’t 15776 hours and…” he looks at his watch “five minutes old. I even took into account extra days for leap year.”
“Damn iiiiiiiiiiiit” her argument loosing a lot of validity as she desolved into helpless giggles as tickling fingers found her soft tummy, wiggling franticly under them.
He continued his droning lecture as he continued tickling, “I mean its not just cowtowing to a ridiculous law based on an absolutely arbitrary age range that actualy dates back to ancient times and draws its validity from the idea of parents owning their children. This is about fundemental morality. What do you think I am some kind of sick twisted creature that preys on children…. Leave me some dignity.”
“Ok ok ok…. But um .. Trying to distract him from the tickling as her strength was failing her and her voice became horse from the screaming, but all arguments failed her. Now that she was 18 obviously there was no one who would come to her aid… they would delight in her suffering, her mind ached with the effort of trying to endure the agony. Despite her throws of agony and her aching stomach muscles she realized something, he had waited for her… and she had to offer him something if she wanted to find mercy… she thought desperately and then she knew what she could offer.
“My.. My best friend Heather… shes more ticklish than me, has a compleate phobia of it … and shes an exotic dancer. You like young girls, if I take you to her will you spare me?”
“How young” he looked at her suspiciously.
“17, but she’s British.”
“YES age of consent in Britain is 16… wait… were still in the internet world…. “
“So what do we do… I mean shes 18 in a week”
He slumped down tired and a bit defeated into his chair “We wait.”
Her screams echoed off the wall as he slowly pulled off her thin ruffled sock… “no no not the feet… please.. Please”
“We have a whole week to kill."
PS: I am not trying to criticize the moderators. Just the culture that creates the laws. Hope you enjoy. (Also a little inspired by Kloey from Tickle Central, and obviously the recent MK&A celeb stories)
Eighteen and One Minute
He sat in the darkness, the glow of a cigarette all that illuminated his face. He had not been this ready for anything since he was a schoolboy, and it had been awhile. He had almost made a fatal mistake, he had tried to get inside five minutes earlier… his watch was five minutes fast. Almost such a huge mistake. Thank God he saw the clock on the wall before it was too late. Now the time had come. He moved into the bedroom and surveyed the reward of his patience.
She was so beautiful laying there, her long hair across her pillow, silk skin caressed by satin sheets. She was the kind of beauty that filled a mans dreams, that filled his mind day in and day out. As he leaned down with the rope he smelled the soft scent of strawberry body wash and shampoo, and in that single moment he was happy. She let out a scream as he took hold of her, and fought violently out of her slumber, but the fight was short lived, and in few moments she laid tied to her bed completely awake and eyes filled with abject fear.
“Wh… what are you doing here?” She ask he lips slightly quavering as she tried to gain control of her fear.
A slow smile made its way over his lips. “Well, Its your birthday. I’ve waited so long for this day… the day I could torture you to my hearts content. Have my way with you in any way I pleased.”
She looked back at him now almost as confused as she was afraid, “On my birthday, I mean don’t you think that’s kinnda mean?”
He shook his head in frustration, “You don’t understand. Five minutes ago you were a sweet precious child, protected from the sexual gaze of men and there heinous but now… now your fully a woman. I saw you a while back and I wanted to approach you, but obviously I couldn’t do that. I mean it would have been a terrible crime against nature… a man, trying to have a real relationship with a child of only 17 years and 11 months. What an atrocity it would have been. So I decided to go this route instead.”
“But… this is kidnapping…” Her senece cut short as he ran a finger down the smooth hollow of her armpit. Her whole body spazamed against the tight bondage that held her in place. “Oh no. no no no no no…. I am SO ticklish, you absolutely cant do that. I mean that’s torture. Your obviously a guy with some morals, all worried about me being 18... You don’t wanna resort to kidnapping AND torture.”
He scoffed with a sadistic smile, “Oh that’s where your wrong…were in the internet world. That means that torture, kidnapping… heck even brutal rape (though not my torment of choice) are completely acceptable. Just be sure its not before they are 18. I mean would you want to see our nice story followed by hundreds of flames reading something like “I have kids, and you’re an abomination… just for thinking about kids id wanna kill you KILL YOU.” cause killing is also acceptable because the author of the story is also over 18. Or even worse, you and I are both wiped out of existence by a righteous mod who wants to protect people from that kind of abhorrent filth”
“But.. But…” She relxed slightly as the obvious infallibility of this powerful moral argument sank in. “I guess your riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii” again her sentence trailed into an incomprehensible squeal as fingers dug into her ribcage thrashing side to side in helpless agony. “no more please…. Please”
He was relentless in his torture. Her body shaking violently anything to avoid the tickling. The sounds of her sweet laughter filling the room. “It is a shame… I really was just going to ask you out but I didn’t wanna corrupt innocence of course.”
She looked up at him her hair matted to her face from laughing and struggling.. Her face full of indignation “Look buddy, this is America, I’ve been sexually active for 3 YEARS.”
“but you weren’t 15776 hours and…” he looks at his watch “five minutes old. I even took into account extra days for leap year.”
“Damn iiiiiiiiiiiit” her argument loosing a lot of validity as she desolved into helpless giggles as tickling fingers found her soft tummy, wiggling franticly under them.
He continued his droning lecture as he continued tickling, “I mean its not just cowtowing to a ridiculous law based on an absolutely arbitrary age range that actualy dates back to ancient times and draws its validity from the idea of parents owning their children. This is about fundemental morality. What do you think I am some kind of sick twisted creature that preys on children…. Leave me some dignity.”
“Ok ok ok…. But um .. Trying to distract him from the tickling as her strength was failing her and her voice became horse from the screaming, but all arguments failed her. Now that she was 18 obviously there was no one who would come to her aid… they would delight in her suffering, her mind ached with the effort of trying to endure the agony. Despite her throws of agony and her aching stomach muscles she realized something, he had waited for her… and she had to offer him something if she wanted to find mercy… she thought desperately and then she knew what she could offer.
“My.. My best friend Heather… shes more ticklish than me, has a compleate phobia of it … and shes an exotic dancer. You like young girls, if I take you to her will you spare me?”
“How young” he looked at her suspiciously.
“17, but she’s British.”
“YES age of consent in Britain is 16… wait… were still in the internet world…. “
“So what do we do… I mean shes 18 in a week”
He slumped down tired and a bit defeated into his chair “We wait.”
Her screams echoed off the wall as he slowly pulled off her thin ruffled sock… “no no not the feet… please.. Please”
“We have a whole week to kill."
