Dave2112
Level of Cherry Feather
- Joined
- Apr 17, 2001
- Messages
- 10,298
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Well, I just got back from my "vacation" weekend, and all I can say is I wished I'd stayed put!
For anyone out there who actually cares about these sort of things...
My uncle and I started out four hours late looking forward to a 7 hour drive. Usually 5, but we were towing a camper that was a wee to heavy for his 3/4 ton truck. We made a few stops along the way to check the transmission fluid, and topped it off a little as needed. There were a lot of hills and mountains, so the tranny wasn't too happy to begin with.
So we get to where we're about an hour or so away and the transmission just pukes. 7 quarts of tranny fluid shoots out from overheating. Plus we are going uphill through a mountain road. My uncle decides to try to slowly back down to a pull-off so we can at least get off the road. No such luck, as we start to jacknife. We get out of the truck and find that we are right across the road, blocking both lanes. If a car came along, they'd be pissed because it's a long way to turn around and go back around the mountain. But if it's a semi-truck coming around the bend and down the hill.....there was no way they'd be able to stop.
Luckily, it was about 2:30 in the morning and the first car to come along was a State Trooper car. They blocked the road while we put in the last two quarts of ATF we had. It was just enough to allow us to straighten out and be in at least one lane. The cops wait about a half-hour to see if the truck will go after it cools down. No dice. They call for a wrecker, clearly specifying that we had a 4000 lb. truck and a 4000 lb. camper.
This guy shows up with a flat-bed, no hitch. Now, it turns out that this is the guy the county calls when no one else will go on a 3 a.m. call. Long story short, he tells us that he'll tow the truck back to his house, get his truck with a hitch, and tow the camper to where we're going. Then he'll bring the truck to us the next morning. Now, this moron brings his girlfriend along, so we have to ride in the truck....on top of the flat bed!! Totally illegal, but we decide, what the fuck? Wanna do a bowl? So here we are smoking a bowl, on top of a flat bed. Then the guy goes down a dirt road to his "house" doing about 70. I swore the truck was going to fall off.
We get there (there were cars everywhere and I swear there was a goat tied to a stick) and he grabs his other truck. Of course the girlfriend has to go along, so there are four of us in the front seat of this dilapidated truck, towing our camper for the next 80 miles. The girl has to have the heat on full blast, and we're in our winter gear. And let me tell you...both of those guys were retarded, I swear. Or related, one or the other. If one of them pulled out a banjo, it wouldn't have surprised me one bit. She kept talking very openly about how she had to go to the bathroom and regaled us with and hour and a half of things that make her crap. I swear to God, I couldn't make that up.
He had the wrong hook-up for the trailer, so we were towing with no lights. He assures us that he gets away with it all the time because all the cops know he does late-night towing. He even said, twice no less, that he "gets away with murder" around here. So I'm thinking... When was the last time you got away with this...Murder? Sure as shit, we get stopped 3 times, once I thought for sure we were going to get searched because this girl was getting mouthy with the Tropers. Oh, and I had a half an ounce on me, so that would have been cute.
We finally get there, and we have to pull the camper up an incline to get it onto my uncle's land. It is here that the guy informs us that the 4-wheel drive doesn't work. He guns it up the hill.
And stalls. Sliding back, he panics and tries to hit the brakes, which he proceeded to lock up. Sliding down toward the blind curve road, the camper starts to sharply jacknife and the truck ain't stopping. There was a culvert running along the road, and if the tires hit that, it would have flipped it, and taken the truck with it due to the stabilizer bars. That didn't happen, but he pinched his bumper into one of the propane tanks, which started leaking. We unhooked it, praying the whole time, and tossed it down the embankement. If it blew, it blew and we'd deal with it then. It didn't, so there was one thing. The trailer actually wound up settling pretty level, so we decided fuck it, we'll leave it by the road and get some sleep. About three hours. Before he showed up with the truck and charged us 350 freakin' dollars!
The truck turned out to just be dry of fluid, so at least the torque converter wasn't gone, which would have had us dropping a tranny outside in the winter.
We got the camper up to the field the next day, and then the water wouldn't work, so suffice it to say, we smelled pretty ripe after three days.
But we did have a couple of good campfires, smoked some good weed and I found a long turkey feather which I placed over the door to the camper as kind of a personal symbolic gesture.
I am so glad to be back.....
For anyone out there who actually cares about these sort of things...
My uncle and I started out four hours late looking forward to a 7 hour drive. Usually 5, but we were towing a camper that was a wee to heavy for his 3/4 ton truck. We made a few stops along the way to check the transmission fluid, and topped it off a little as needed. There were a lot of hills and mountains, so the tranny wasn't too happy to begin with.
So we get to where we're about an hour or so away and the transmission just pukes. 7 quarts of tranny fluid shoots out from overheating. Plus we are going uphill through a mountain road. My uncle decides to try to slowly back down to a pull-off so we can at least get off the road. No such luck, as we start to jacknife. We get out of the truck and find that we are right across the road, blocking both lanes. If a car came along, they'd be pissed because it's a long way to turn around and go back around the mountain. But if it's a semi-truck coming around the bend and down the hill.....there was no way they'd be able to stop.
Luckily, it was about 2:30 in the morning and the first car to come along was a State Trooper car. They blocked the road while we put in the last two quarts of ATF we had. It was just enough to allow us to straighten out and be in at least one lane. The cops wait about a half-hour to see if the truck will go after it cools down. No dice. They call for a wrecker, clearly specifying that we had a 4000 lb. truck and a 4000 lb. camper.
This guy shows up with a flat-bed, no hitch. Now, it turns out that this is the guy the county calls when no one else will go on a 3 a.m. call. Long story short, he tells us that he'll tow the truck back to his house, get his truck with a hitch, and tow the camper to where we're going. Then he'll bring the truck to us the next morning. Now, this moron brings his girlfriend along, so we have to ride in the truck....on top of the flat bed!! Totally illegal, but we decide, what the fuck? Wanna do a bowl? So here we are smoking a bowl, on top of a flat bed. Then the guy goes down a dirt road to his "house" doing about 70. I swore the truck was going to fall off.
We get there (there were cars everywhere and I swear there was a goat tied to a stick) and he grabs his other truck. Of course the girlfriend has to go along, so there are four of us in the front seat of this dilapidated truck, towing our camper for the next 80 miles. The girl has to have the heat on full blast, and we're in our winter gear. And let me tell you...both of those guys were retarded, I swear. Or related, one or the other. If one of them pulled out a banjo, it wouldn't have surprised me one bit. She kept talking very openly about how she had to go to the bathroom and regaled us with and hour and a half of things that make her crap. I swear to God, I couldn't make that up.
He had the wrong hook-up for the trailer, so we were towing with no lights. He assures us that he gets away with it all the time because all the cops know he does late-night towing. He even said, twice no less, that he "gets away with murder" around here. So I'm thinking... When was the last time you got away with this...Murder? Sure as shit, we get stopped 3 times, once I thought for sure we were going to get searched because this girl was getting mouthy with the Tropers. Oh, and I had a half an ounce on me, so that would have been cute.
We finally get there, and we have to pull the camper up an incline to get it onto my uncle's land. It is here that the guy informs us that the 4-wheel drive doesn't work. He guns it up the hill.
And stalls. Sliding back, he panics and tries to hit the brakes, which he proceeded to lock up. Sliding down toward the blind curve road, the camper starts to sharply jacknife and the truck ain't stopping. There was a culvert running along the road, and if the tires hit that, it would have flipped it, and taken the truck with it due to the stabilizer bars. That didn't happen, but he pinched his bumper into one of the propane tanks, which started leaking. We unhooked it, praying the whole time, and tossed it down the embankement. If it blew, it blew and we'd deal with it then. It didn't, so there was one thing. The trailer actually wound up settling pretty level, so we decided fuck it, we'll leave it by the road and get some sleep. About three hours. Before he showed up with the truck and charged us 350 freakin' dollars!
The truck turned out to just be dry of fluid, so at least the torque converter wasn't gone, which would have had us dropping a tranny outside in the winter.
We got the camper up to the field the next day, and then the water wouldn't work, so suffice it to say, we smelled pretty ripe after three days.
But we did have a couple of good campfires, smoked some good weed and I found a long turkey feather which I placed over the door to the camper as kind of a personal symbolic gesture.
I am so glad to be back.....
