Great Female Comebacks

Man: "Haven't we met before?"
Woman: "Yes, I'm the receptionist at the VD Clinic."

Man: "Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Woman: "Yeah, that's why I don't go there anymore."

Man: "Is this seat empty?"
Woman: "Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down."

Man: "So, wanna go back to my place ?"
Woman: "Well, I don't know. Will two people fit under a rock?"

Man: "Your place or mine?"
Woman: "Both. You go to yours and I'll go to mine."

Man: "I'd like to call you. What's your number?"
Woman: "It's in the phone book."

Man: "But I don't know your name."
Woman: "That's in the phone book too."

Man: "So what do you do for a living?"
Woman: "I'm a female impersonator."

Man: "What sign were you born under?"
Woman: "No Parking."

Man: "Hey, baby, what's your sign?"
Woman: "Do not Enter"

Man: "How do you like your eggs in the morning?"
Woman: "Unfertilized"

Man: "Hey, come on, we're both here at this bar for the same reason"
Woman: "Yeah! Let's pick up some chicks!"

Man: "I'm here to fulfill your every sexual fantasy."
Woman: "You mean you've got both a donkey and a Great Dane?"

Man: "I know how to please a woman."
Woman: "Then please leave me alone."

Man: "I want to give myself to you."
Woman: "Sorry, I don't accept cheap gifts."

Man: "I can tell that you want me."
Woman: "Ohhhh. You're so right. I want you to leave."

Man: "If I could see you naked, I'd die happy
Woman: "Yeah, but if I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing."

Man: "Hey cutie, how 'bout you and I hitting the hot spots?"
Woman: "Sorry, I don't date outside my species.."

Man: "Your body is like a temple."
Woman: "Sorry, there are no services today."

Man: "I'd go through anything for you."
Woman: "Good! Let's start with your bank account."

Man: "I would go to the end of the world for you."
Woman: "Yes, but would you stay there?

LOL
Very funny.

Man: "So, wanna go back to my place ?"
Woman: "Well, I don't know. Will two people fit under a rock?"

Man: "Hey cutie, how 'bout you and I hitting the hot spots?"
Woman: "Sorry, I don't date outside my species.."

Click to expand...

ROFFLMFAO!!! Damn! Funny Shit! These can be used with almost every single guy in this area! Thanks... I'll definitely keep these in mind for future reference and use!

A couple more, actually overheard.

A lady friend of mine who tended bar in NYC, after shooting down the tenth come on line from the same persistant fool.
Peristant fool; "What are you, a lesbian?"
Bartender; "If you're the alternative, yes!"

In a NYC restaurant, a gorgeous young woman's date has gone to the men's room. A boor at the next table tries to hit on her, she shoots him down several times. Finally;
Boor at next table; "Aw, come on, what has he got that I haven't got?"
Beauty on date; "He has five things, actually, none of which you'll ever have."
Boor; "Oh, yeah? What are they?"
Beauty; "Intelligence, looks, a personality, a sense of humor, and me."

Mastertank1

We who play and dance are thought mad by they who hear no music.

Nice ones heavenly, Mastertank those were too funny.

Now why do I get the feeling that this is gonna spawn a thread of "Great Male Comebacks?"

Oh... wait... pardon me... my mistake... it was wrong of me to assume the weaker witted of the species would have great comebacks.

But for a moment there... didn't you actually believe they could?

LMAO!!!!! I should try some of these! WOnder if they would work!