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It hit my facebook, and then bored into all of my friends' profiles. DON'T OPEN IT!!

My laptop just insulted me! It keeps closing down windows, I restarted it, it asked me what my password was. I remembered that my uncle (who fixed it recently) said my password is "banana". I typed in "banana" and the computer wrote: "Your mind is not just twisted, it is actively sprained."...

Part 1: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rOH4KRdsLuw Part 2: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jHt_wV3RkvM Part 3: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2Fl1nbUFOls I'm sorry, I haven't worked out how to put actual videos up yet.

What happens if you play country and western albums backwards? You get your house back, your wife back and your dog comes back to life.

I was diagnosed with Asperger's syndrome when I was 11, I found this on the internet: http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Asperger's syndrome It made me depressed that other people felt that way about us, but then (after a few drinks) I realized that almost every minority that there is has...

I KNEW IT! I tuned in to watch my childhood hero Stone Cold Steve Austin return for one night as guest host of RAW, and the bastards cut out integral parts of his dialogue! "Open up a can of . . . ." I'm bloody sick of this! If you don't want your kids to hear swearing then you should know...

A blonde is sitting in the audience of a ventriloquist act. The act unfortunately consists of blonde jokes. The blonde lady stands up and shouts: "I'm sick of all the fucking blonde jokes, we do have feelings, you know!" "I'm sorry love, I won't say anymore." Said the ventriloquist. "I'm not...

I already posted one of these, thought I'd give it another try. Any women out there want to be tickled? I live in Blackburn. In all honesty I'm just posting this because I'm bored. . .Not much happening at the moment . . . . yep. . . blah blah blah blah :ermm:

What our MPs are really thinking: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pTC7sDcVrqM

I'll try to be as forthcoming as I can.

There's something about this Santa Clause thing that really gets up my arse. The real Saint Nicholas was an alcoholic wife beater. He was a toymaker who used to wait till the end of the night to make toys for his kids then he'd get pissed and go to the wrong house. That's why everyone loved...

Scientists in Liverpool have established all 7 variations of fart: A rip, a rap, a bubble and a squeak, a wet one, a dry one and one that doesn't speak.

Seriously running out of titles . . .

I'm running out of titles . . .

People really seem to be enjoying these . . .

Don't know about copyright, but I checked for writing on them.

Here we go, second upload attempt . . .

Probably already been done. 1987 Jaws: The Revenge (massive flop)

First off, I'm a ler, not a lee. Being tickled myself does not turn me on, it makes me frantic. I thought this might amuse you: About two years ago, I met a girl in the local pub and we hit it off. She was very nice and had that tomboy look. Her name was Julie, but she called herself...

Recently I have been conversing with a few female members, and at one point or another I told them I would like to tickle them. It was just explained to me by one of them that this is inappropriate. Hindsight is always 20.20, it WAS inappropriate, I should have known better, even though I was...