Pulp Tickle Fiction
By Max Speer
I was sitting in my dining room practicing my favorite hobby: cleaning and oiling my switchblade collection. I inserted the tiny straw into the nozzle of my WD40 can and sprayed into my 13" Italian Stiletto. A back-up of lubricant shot back at face and lubricated my eyeballs.
"Son of a @#%$!!!" I yelled, grabbing my eyes and dancing around the room. The knife fell out of my hand and hit the floor, springing into open position.
I grasped for the cold water tap and threw handfuls of water into my eyes soaking my entire jacket and shirt.
The Phone rang.
"Damn it!" I yelled. "Who the @#%$ can THAT be?"
Eyes still closed, I reached my hand out and tried to find the phone through my new blindness.
"Yeah! Who the hell is it?" I croaked.
"Tony," a voice whispered from the other end.
I sobered quickly.
"Yeah, is that how you answer the freakin' phone, you moron?"
"Sorry," I said like a puppy that had just laid a turd on the rug. "I had a little accident here..."
"I don't care about your fuckin' accidents. I'm not payin' you to have accidents. I'm payin' you to cause them."
Boy, he was tense!
"What can I do for you, Boss?"
"I got a little problem, Tony, it's my wife. I got whipped into takin' her out tonight. Somethin' like our anniversary or somethin' like that. I need you to take care of Mia."
This was good. Very good. The fact that the Boss trusted me enough to watch over his main squeeze could only help me in the Organization.
"Whatya want me to do with her, Boss?"
What the @#%$'s that supposed to mean?" he barked.
"I mean, take her out, show her a good time?" I was sweating.
Yeah," he said calmly. "Show her a good time. Not too good," he added.
"You can count on me, Boss."
"Good," he said, pleased with his little soldier. "You do this right, Tony, and I have plans for you."
He gave me her address and instructed me to pick her up at 6:00, take her out to a good dinner (the restaurant had an unlimited 'tab' for the Boss) and take her home.
I was elated as I hung up the phone. The Boss, being 75 years old, went for younger women, so I figured Mia to be somewhere around 50-55 years. I'd get the bag a great dinner, pull out the 'charm', dance a little, make her feel young again. He would be so happy with the way I treated his girlfriend that I might be allowed into the Inner Circle.
Putting on my best suit and tie, I checked my breath in my hands and sprayed my mouth with Ultra Mint; then I ran out the door.
I must've smoked a pack of Viceroys in the car before I pulled up to her house at 5:55. It was a beautiful stone house with sculptured hedges. The Boss treated his women right.
The air was warm and balmy on that Summer night, as I walked to the front door and rang the bell, flowers in hand.
The door opened and I gasped. The woman at the door must've been 23-24, tops. She was gorgeous, with straight black hair and sparkling blue eyes.
"Uh...is Mia here?" I choked.
"I'm Mia," she said as I could die there on the spot and she wouldn't give a @#%$.
I nearly fainted. I re-checked the address of the match book that I wrote it on, stumbling through my pockets.
"Are you, Tony?" she said.
It WAS her. And she was a vision of loveliness. My heart began to pound.
"Come in and have a drink," she said softly. Then she turned and walked into the house as I followed. Her shape was so perfect that I couldn't move for a second. I had to watch her shapely body shimmy as she moved like a snake in her silk, sleeveless mini-dress. My mouth went dry.
She poured me a Martini and one for herself, then sat on the overstuffed couch and put one hand up on the back of it.
Her long, thin, shapely arm was milky white and looked soft. My eyes followed her hand up to her smooth, hairless underarm; then up her long neck and back to her sweet face. Then I saw her long, shapely legs, one crossed over the other bobbing and scanned my eyes down to her petite feet slipped so delicately into her pumps.
She smiled and I felt an erection begin to press against my pants.
To say she was a Babe-and-a-half was an understatement. She stared at me and smiled.
"You're handsome," she said finally. I blushed. "I'm glad. Vito always sends me ugly, greaseballs. You look nice. I like you."
"I lick...uh..like you too," I stammered, hand shaking as I held the martini to my lips and dribbled a little onto the crotch of my pants letting the olive roll to the plush carpet.
I excused my self and stumbled to the bathroom to throw water on my face. Looking in the mirror, I saw Mia in the room behind me sniffing coke. She threw her head back and closed her eyes, wiping her nose.
This was gonna be difficult.
* * *
When we got to the restaurant, I held the chair for her and she slipped in. As she slid her jacket off of her shoulders, I saw a perfect view of those sexy shoulders revealed so teasingly from her sleeveless dress. Looking further I was able to easily see down the front of that dress at her firm breasts unencumbered by a bra.
The waiter was so nervous waiting on us, once he saw Mia and realized that she was Vito's girl. We were smothered with good intentions. Isn't Hell paved with that? Mia smoked a cigarette and stared at me. I was shifted, uneasily in my chair.
We ate and our conversation slobbered on many things. I made her laugh many times. She laughed so easily, and held her hand over her mouth, giggling like a school girl.
"You have a great laugh," I said boldly, the champagne relaxing my inhibitions.
"I love to laugh," she confessed. "I laugh all the time. Vito is such a sour puss so much of the time and he never cracks me up like you do."
I suddenly got very nervous. "Yeah, but, the Boss is a great guy," I said trying not to agree.
"He never does what I want in bed," she said, causing me to choke on my drink.
"Are you alright?"
"Yes, yes," I choked, wiping my shirt and jacket. "What...what do you mean?"
Mia leaned forward so close that I thought she was going to kiss me. I got nervous, thinking that any moment my head would be blown away. "Can I tell you a secret?' she whispered.
"Give a head...I mean go ahead," I stuttered.
"I'd LOVE to be tied up so I can't move an inch, then tickled until I peed myself."
I could have sworn that the entire restaurant heard my erection slam against the underside of the table.
"For some reason," she continued, "I'm a real tickle freak. My Daddy and brothers used to hold me down and tickle me until I screamed. It made me hot. Real hot!"
"Your father and brothers?" I stammered.
"Yeah," she continued. "And my uncle my cousins, oh, and my aunt. Even my grandmother."
"Your...grandmother?" I said getting up from the floor.
I could have sworn I felt steam shooting out from my collar.
"It really gets me off," she said in a thick mock-English accent. "But Vito never wanted to do that to me. I'm so frustrated."
Then, as I was still digesting her words, Mia slipped one pump off and placed her bare foot directly on my swollen bulge and massaged me with her toes.
I suddenly realized that my mouth was dry since it had been hung open so long and I forgot how to swallow. Mia continued to dig and rub my crotch.
"Ooh. Looks like you already got up from the table. Tickle me," she said smiling.
"Tickle my foot."
I reached down, hands shaking, looking around, and held her delicate ankle in my hand. I didn't feel a trace of stubble on her ankle and realized that she must have had all her extra hair removed through electrolysis or waxing or something. Her leg was so smooth.
Looking around self-conscientiously, I used my other hand to softly stroke the extremely soft sole of her foot.
Mia suddenly threw her head back and cackled, pulling back at her foot somewhat. I held it tightly and let my fingers climb up and down the soft, creases of her sole. She wrinkled her toes inward and began to giggle, grasping at the edge of the table and hunching her shoulders.
"Whoo.....hee hee hee hee hee aah ha ha ha!!! Okay hee hee hee!! Okay You can stah ha ha ha hop now hee hee hee hee hee!!!!!!"
Reluctantly, I stopped, but instead of pulling her foot back, she ground it into my bulge even more.
"My my, you have some snake there in your pants," Mia said giggling.
"Seems like you like tickling me as much as I like being tickled."
My mind raced. I saw an image of myself towering over her spread-eagled body, tickling her into hysterics and then plunging deep into her (probably) hairless wetness and pumping gleefully as I tickled.
Then I saw Vito and the Boys burst in the door and shoot both of us 100 times. I pulled her foot off my crotch and straightened up.
"We better go," I said. The band began to play loud rock & roll, Chuck Berry's 'You Never Can Tell', and Mia got up and took me by the hand.
"Not before we have one quick dance."
She pulled me onto the dance floor and began to shimmy and sway, raising her bare arms over her head and 'tickling' the air with her fingers. I watched like a puppy dog, amazed at her sexiness. I saw her smooth underarms again and imagined how utterly ticklish they must be. I also thought of how she would get off on my tickling her there.
Mia realized that I was looking under her arms and she smiled a smile that went directly down and caused me to throb again. She leaned her head to me and in a mocking voice that could have come out of a teenaged girl, she said, "tickle tickle tickle tickle" over and over again; grabbing at my ribs and trying to tickle me.
I was horny!
I began to dance in earnest and repeated the "tickle" chant back to her, creating dance steps that I didn't know my shoes could even muster.
We were in Rock & Roll Tickle Heaven as we danced back to the table and grabbed her jacket. The waiters bowed to us quickly as if we were the freakin' King & Queen of England.
In the car I managed to steer with great difficulty as Mia bent down and took my...ahem...snake between her soft lips. I tickled her ribs with my free hand and she began to giggle and rolled over on her back, trying to avoid my tickling fingers. I saw her very short dress hike up and reveal her belly button.
Taking advantage of the new found territory, I crawled my squirming fingers over her soft belly and around her belly button. The back of her head was now rolling back and forth, massaging my crotch as she squealed and curled up, giggling.
"Oooooh!" she giggled. "Heeee hee hee hee hee it tickles!!!!"
She reached her two arms up over her head to grab at my newly exposed manliness and I tickled her newly exposed underarm.
Mia screamed and her body shot to an upright position so fast that it startled me.
"No no no no no," she giggled. "Not the underarms. Much too ticklish there. No no no no!"
Wow. This girl was incredibly ticklish!
My car screeched up her driveway and we ran out of the car; I was barely dressed. As she fumbled with her key in the lock I started wriggling my fingers up and down her ribs and sides. Mia squirmed this way and that giggling and begging me to stop tickling her until she got the door open.
Finally, it opened and we burst into the house, flopping on the couch as I dug my fingers into her sensitive sides and belly. Mia screeched and giggled, again twisting this way and that. She reached up to tickle me back but her reaching was answered by a quick entry of fingers under her arm.
The poor girl screamed and flew backward. "No no no no!" was all she could say as she laughed.
We took a moment to catch our breath and I saw Mia search through her purse. She pulled out a small bag with white powder and set up a line on a Glamour magazine.
"You don't need that stuff,' I said.
"Coke makes me insanely ticklish," was her reply.
I didn't even wait a beat. "Snort away!" I said.
After Mia snorted the coke she ran into the bedroom, leaving a small trail of her pumps in the hallway. I caught up with her and found her lying on the bed. She giggled. Then she threw her arms out to the sides and said the three words that all lovers wait to hear.
"Tie me up!"
I stared at her and she looked at me. There was a moment of 'comfortable' silence. Then I ran to her drawers and looked frantically for something to tie her up with. She giggled, lying there on the bed with her arms over her head as she certainly thought I looked insanely funny, pulling out her little tops and underwear in search of....? there it was, several pairs of pantyhose.
"Those pantyhose are $50 a pair." she said giggling.
"Fifty dollars? My god!"
Who gave a @#%$ at that point.
She giggled as I ran to her, sliding on my knees. I tied her left wrist high over her head at a slight angle to the headboard and repeated the same with her other wrist.
She started to kick her legs, playfully as I grabbed at her ankle, like a game of "catch me if you can" but a quick tickle on her side caused her to throw her head back and laugh. She gave in.
When she was tied to four corners I stepped back and observed the lovely Mia. She was giggling slightly.
"You know," she said seductively. "Vito would have you shot for this." My erection began to wane. "But he'd probably shoot me too."
"I wouldn't count on it," I said as I walked towards her. The sight of her was magnificent. She was tied, not too tight/not too loose, spread for me to tickle. Then I realized that in my haste I'd forgotten to undress her and she lay there in her sexy sleeveless dress.
"I forgot to take your clothes off," I said.
"That's alright,' she said with a smile. "I'm sure you'll find ways to get to my tickle spots." I started to approach when she added, "And a few other places as well." Boing! The snake had risen again like some great phoenix rising from its ashes.
I was going to go all hell fury on her but decided on a playful game. I knelt down on the floor just below the bed so she couldn't see me.
"Where are you?" she said giggling.
Then, slowly reaching my hand up, I crawled my index finger over the sheets like some weird worm. Mia began to giggle when she saw it.
"Hello, little worm," she said giggling.
I let the 'worm' crawl up and approach her exposed underarm.
"No noooo!!!" she began to shriek through her giggling. "Not there!"
Ignoring her, I let Wormy crawl over to her warm, soft underarm and I let him 'feed'.
"Yum yum yum!" I said from the floor as my index finger began to stroke up and down the extremely soft skin of her hairless underarm.
Her shrieks were explosive! She laughed and tugged at the hose that bound her wrist up high. She was extraordinarily ticklish on her armpit so I let Wormy slide up and down, then round and round in circles. She laughed hysterically and I was getting off on the softness of her baby-like underarm skin. Then I let the finger slide up, up, up her long arm on that soft, fleshy underside, right to her palm which tried to grab my finger desperately. Then down, down, down like a sliding board into her ticklish armpit.
I jumped on the bed. "Ta-da!" I shouted. Mia was beside herself (which would have been cool had she really been beside herself. That way, I'd tickle both of her) and laughed. I made airplane sounds and 'dive bombed' into both of her exposed armpits.
Mia was laughing so hard that tears began to well up in her eyes. She had that helpless look on her face which grimaced into laughter although it was sheer torture for her.
Her armpits hollowed, pulling inward as if to avoid my fingers which I let wriggle and wiggle inside those two warm and amazingly dry, tickle spots.
As I tickled her armpits I lowered my head and began to kiss her nipples which were very hard and erect beneath her thin dress.
Mia was laughing too hard to coo but I knew it was all turning her on. I lowered my head even more and began biting at her firm belly. This caused another explosion of giggling and I let my firm, Roman nose poke and rub back and forth over her extremely sensitive torso.
"What have we here?" I said as I began to unbutton her dress right at the belly area. "A belly button?"
"No no nooo," Mia protested through her giggles. There it was, so soft and delicate, like an inverted rose. No belly button ring. I liked that. Tender, untouched. Virgin skin.
I began to kiss and lick that area and Mia giggle and cooed. I reached up and caressed her breasts, tickling her erect nipples.
Mia giggled, laughed and cooed all in the space of 2 seconds. Then she began to giggle harder and her hips rose up to press against me.
"Getting horny?" I asked mockingly.
"Yes," she said, still giggling. Mia was the most ticklish and sensitive girl I had ever met.
I began to finger her delicate ribcage and Mia exploded again to a rash of hysterics. Her body shimmied this way and that as I tickled her sensitive sides, still licking and kissing her soft belly button and the area around it. Then I tickled down into her belly area again and she bucked like a flopping fish out of water, laughing that cute girlish laughter of hers.
I let my body slip down to her feet until my knees touched the floor. Her legs were exquisite and I kissed her inner thighs. I caught a scent of some body oil on her legs, it was rose or lavender. Some damn flower. Her legs were unbelievably soft and smooth.
My kissing moved downward and as they neared her tender feet, her cooing began to turn to giggling.
"Please," she began to plead. "Not my feet. Not like this!"
"Oh yes, "I retorted trying to sound smart and poetic. "If your legs are an ice cream sundae, your feet are the whipped cream." It was the best I could do at such a moment. Then I burped. Damn meal is repeating on me again. Never should have danced so soon after eating.
I took her big toe in my mouth like a giant lollipop and Mia laughed and pleaded. She was horribly ticklish there as I licked beneath her toes. Her head went back and her eyes squeezed shut as I began to run my fingers lightly up and down the length of her soft soles. Tears began to stream down her face and she screamed and squealed.
Her head flew back and forth and I saw her bound hands clawing at the air. Her laughter was almost silent until it settled down into a musical giggle.
"Ticklish?" I said mockingly.
Mia was laughing too hard to answer.
"I'm gonna keep tickling until you answer me. Ticklish?"
"Ye........hee hee hee hee hee hee!!!" was all she could muster up as she squealed. I had begun to apply more pressure on her ticklish soles and even let my nails begin scrapping the extremely sensitive skin.
"Yes!! Yes I'm ticklish!!! Too ticklish!!!!"
"Does it feel good?"
Yes, Mia. Does it feel good?" came from a deep husky, all too familiar voice.
"Huh?" Mia said as if her tickle button had been instantly turned off.
I couldn't bear to look. My dinner started to rise and I could almost taste it. I quickly ascertained the situation. Mia was completely dressed. I was on the floor no where near her. That was good. She was tied, spread-eagle to the bed. Bad. Very bad.
"Hi honey," Mia said to Vito like a little girl. "Tony was just giving me a foot massage."
"A foot massage?" he said with a voice that could've come out of Jabba the Hut. "Why are you tied up?"
Now I always thought a foot massage was nothing. I mean, as Samuel Jackson put it, "It's only a foot massage". But then John Travolta had to say, "Yeah, well would you give a foot massage to a man?"
Vito didn't throw me out the window like he planned. Mia protested and said that I was a gentleman. She said that she needed it and the only way that she could stand it was being tied up so she wouldn't kick me. Vito didn't buy it at all but he did let me live.
In fact the "plans" he had for me involved tickling his girlfriend. So I made it to his inner circle.
But that's another story.
You are Unique - just like everybody else.
ok one more post although i promised myself i wouldnt post on every Max story. i never laughed so hard from a story for a long time, and i needed a good laugh. Max your humour is outstanding. lol@the bag. i knew she wouldnt be some bag. and it just progressed from there. the tickling scenes were great, but in this story the humour was what struck home to me. loved it and just had to bump it up.
Ain't got no damn signature.