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A little bit of carelessness can end up in disaster

Joined
Nov 2, 2010
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Call it a midlife crisis, senility, or simply the allure that comes naturally to those who play musical instruments socially, but after 30 years of being (mostly) on the wagon, I've started smoking reefer again. Although it's not yet legal here in Austin, TX, there is a large campus here and that means plenty of availability. They also have head shops here, although nobody seems to call them that any more.

For the most part, I'm a weekend warrior, but I recently made an exception when I spent a couple of days up in Dallas on business. While there, I actually got to meet and hang out with fellow TMF member Coldneck. We partied at his spread which I have to admit was pretty impressive. It's in a gated community. He's got a workout room on the ground floor. We pumped some iron, although for me it had been a while and I did considerably fewer reps at lower weight than Coldneck, who is a freaking machine. I have to say that in person, Coldneck is quite an interesting character. He's an upbeat energetic dude who seems to be in a perpetual good mood that is rather infectuous.

Then we poured some liquor and went upstairs to his music room. He's got lots of instruments, mostly guitars. We jammed on acoustics. I played an Ovation while he played a Taylor. Coldneck is a lot younger than me of course, and his repetoire of songs is considerably more modern, while I know mostly the old stuff. But we found some common ground and jammed on tunes like Pinball Wizard, some Beatles, and some Stones. But I think our best jam was Venus by Shocking Blue. We also got stoned on some kind bud I brought up from Austin, smoking it out of a recently purchased brass chamber pipe I also brought.

When I got back to Austin at about 6:30 pm the next day, the rental car place was closed, so I grabbed my stuff, tossed the keys into the night deposit slot, hopped into my own car and drove home. About an hour later I realized to my horror, that I had left my cool brass pipe in the console of the rental car. That pipe actually has a little attachment for stash which contained a nice little bud. I was in big trouble, and I knew it.

After a brief period of self-admonishment ("DAJT, you are one stupid motherfucker!"), I started considering what should be done. Should I just let it be, and hope for the best? Should I try and retrieve it in the morning? What if I get there and the cops are waiting?! I mulled it over throughout the evening and ultimately decided on a plan.

The next morning I got up early and showed up at the rental car place a half hour before they were scheduled to open. As I pulled into the parking lot, I saw a police car standing there with it's red and blue lights flashing. "That's not good," I thought. Then I saw that the policeman was dealing with somebody. Whether the guy had bad plates or drugs, I had no clue. I was just relieved it wasn't about my rental car and the questionable item within. A few minutes later, a man and a woman showed up to open the car rental office.

"Good morning," I said to them. The woman was the one who had hooked me up with the car to begin with.

"Good morning," she said. "How was your trip?"

"It was fine," I answered. "But I'm afraid I left something in the car and didn't realize it until after I'd already returned the keys."

She laughed, "Oh don't sweat it. We get that a lot. And people usually remember right after they drop the keys in the slot!"

"Yeah!" I laughed nervously. "Been there, done that! heh. Well if I could just get those keys, I'll run out there and...."

"Oh I'll go out there with you," she interrupted. "I need to check the vehicle anyway."

"Of course."

I followed her out to the car. She unlocked it and opened the driver's door. She turned to me and asked, "Where exactly did you leave it?"

As you can imagine, this was a tense moment. However, when push comes to shove, I can usually think on my feet when I have to.

"I'm not certain," I lied. "Can I look for it?"

"Sure," she said. She stepped aside and watched me for a moment as I looked around the dashboard and the door pocket. Then she opened the driver's side back door and started looking on the seat and the floor.

This was my moment. I opened the console compartment between the driver and passenger seat. The console lid blocked her view, but she was no longer looking in my direction anyway. My left hand darted in and snagged the brass pipe and whisked it into my left pants pocket, while simultaneously my right hand pulled a little USB flash drive out of my right pants pocket that I made sure to bring with me. This happened in the space of one second, and she saw none of it.

"I got it!" I pronounced, holding up the thumb drive.

"Oh good," she said, looking up. Then she finished checking the vehicle.

I got my receipt and we said our good-byes. I drove off and headed into the office. I pulled into a space in the parking garage, and just sat for a few moments and let the tension and anxiety drain out of me.

That was a little TOO close!

brass bowl.jpg
 
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That was a close call. :yowzer: And quick thinking to bring the thumb drive with you, something that you could pretend to find that might have been very important to you.
 
Awesome story! I've been there under different curcumstances...Unfortunately, more than once. I hate being a burnout sometimes.

So far as I'm concerned, you made off like a bandit! Wicked-slick thinking on your part!
 
I hear you! Had a few close calls myself once upon a time... there are few feelings worse than uncertain, impending doom :)
 
The closest call of a similar nature that I ever had was many years ago last century on a three-day weekend when I was traveling by train from London to Germany to see a friend. The journey of necessity included a channel crossing by boat, since this was decades before the Channel Tunnel had opened and many years before the EU had abolished customs checks. I was a student and wearing my nice Harris tweed jacket which only came out for special occasions. The ship docked in Belgium and as I was waiting to be examined by the Border Guards I got my passport out and realized I had a huge chunk of hash in my pocket that I'd misplaced last time I'd worn that garment.

I noticed some people being searched and carefully did not panic though doing so was foremost in my fevered mind- but this was one of the rare occasions when for once my wits didn't desert me. I suppose I could have surreptitiously just dropped the stuff on the floor and walked away from it but it had cost me a fair bit on a student's meager budget and I couldn't bring myself to waste it. So in a fit of youthful confidence/madness I stuffed the foil-wrapped hash into the bottom of the long padded envelope containing my passport, tickets and wads of other travel receipts, pulled passport and ticket halfway out, and handed the whole thing to the Immigration Officer. He cursorily examined my ticket and passport as the other was checking my duty-free champagne and me, then my passport was stamped with an entry clearance, the officials handed everything back, gave me the usual thin smile common to all men in all countries who hold that position and told me to proceed.

Thus while one was patting me down the other had helpfully albeit unknowingly held my drugs on my behalf. I correctly predicted they wouldn't search one another.

And while boarding the train afterwards for the European portion of the journey, practically dead with the relief, a pretty Austrian girl with very red lips and longish ash-blonde hair who I'd noticed on the boat smiled at me, so I invited her into my compartment (Continental trains used to be designed that way) where we drank champagne and smoked hash all the way to the German border. And kissed a bit, etc... she had sensitive sides and a lovely laugh.

I never saw her again though we wrote to one another for a while.

Spring of 1980.... I was 24.
 
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Just what Austin needs, another stoner. :p

Just kidding of course, glad you dodged that bullet. ;)
 
Brilliant!

What a fantastic story w/ a happy ending! (Not the kind you get at the massage parlor, but still)

So glad you were cunning enough to retrieve your little friend ... I don't know if I would have been able to pull that off, so kuddos to you for level-headed thinking under max duress, bra.

And thanks for all the kind words, but the pleasure to meet you in person was all mine.

To anyone foolish enough to lock horns with DAJuT, I have a slice of advice: If you like to eat solid foods than don't even think about it.
This beast was toying with 2 plates on an Olympic incline and full-depth squatted 3 w/o a spotter. That's some pretty serious poundage. He throws down in the sound studio just as well.

That was a really fun night on the spur of the moment. We'll have to do it again, sir.

And bring your magic little friend along too, but this time ... well, you know.
 
My God, DAJT,.... that was a truly suspenseful little tale,.. I was on the edge of my seat. Good job....
 
...
And while boarding the train afterwards for the European portion of the journey, practically dead with the relief, a pretty Austrian girl with very red lips and longish ash-blonde hair who I'd noticed on the boat smiled at me, so I invited her into my compartment (Continental trains used to be designed that way) where we drank champagne and smoked hash all the way to the German border. And kissed a bit, etc... she had sensitive sides and a lovely laugh.

I never saw her again though we wrote to one another for a while.

Spring of 1980.... I was 24.

Ah, those were the days, when stuff like that could and often did happen spontaneously! I've been involved in somewhat similar occurrences myself, back in the day (albeit minus the tickling...) !
 
Wow, great story, DAJT. This is why I should probably stay in the dark about the joys of pot, even though so many of my friends and acquaintances in the theatre world enjoy it: That's exactly the kind of thing that would happen to me, and I wouldn't have the smoothness to pull off that recovery. The most I could do would be try to snatch it up fast so she wouldn't see what it was, and hope that she was of the see-no-evil mindset in the event that she did get a glimpse of it. Well done.

(Now when you see me at TMF at all, it will be mainly in this section. I'll leave it to others to draw their own conclusions as to why that is, but I make no complaints of it. "You can get just so much of a good thing, you can linger too long in your dreams...")
 
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