My Recent Activity on TMF

Hi All! I know a lot of you saw my latest back-and-forth with Wolf. Well, I thought I would give an explanation as to why I did that [this is not an excuse for it, but].

Now, I know that nobody HAS to believe this, but I swear on my live it's true.

Do any of you know what it's like to be the glue trying to hold your family together?

Like of a morning [every morning], I don't know what I'll be waking up to. In truth, I have woke up to my parents not saying a word to each other, snipping at each other or just full blown world war 3'ing each other.

And, It often falls to me to play mediator.

They [my parents] were split-up once [before I was born], but my grand-parents [being big christens] HAD to get them back together. I wish I could go back in time, and tell my grand-parents what a mistake that was.

And, I don't have a lot of ways to vent my stress. So, I guess it finally hit melt-down level.

In-fact. You know that music video to “Firework” by Katy Perry? I like the song, but I can't watch the vid. Hit's to close to home for me.

That is where video games come into play. Oftentimes, more-or-less, I am playing trying to escape my real life. But, they can only do so much in terms of stress relieve.

Since I “went-off”, I have felt some better.

I am NOT looking for sympathy or pity. Just thought I would put the explanation to what I did on record.

Tickle-gamer... I GUARANTEE you no one is thinking about that anymore. And I'm also sure no one thought that much about it to begin with. To reduce your stress you can ask (within the same thread the perceived drama is happening.) "Have I made anyone uncomfortable?" Or... "Are we all on the same page or should I explain further what I meant."

I understand the pressing need to make sure everyone is comfortable with you. But in the future it will always mean more to write the people directly at their mail. Or ask questions like I wrote above. And ACCEPT the answers you are given. Then let it go. There is so much going on in this world already... you only need to clarify and tune your questions better so you don't have to feel so in the dark about how you are being perceived. Less stress for you and everyone around you!

When I say tune... you know how a parent would talk to a child? The most basic questions to receive the most basic answers. Just simplify as much as you can to get the simple responses you are looking for. By doing these threads over and over again... you're actually in danger of making people feel uncomfortable. You are putting them in the spotlight so to speak rather than ask them in private. Help people feel actually comfortable with you by trusting that you are a person that can handle situations as more of a helpful person would. Its easier than you are letting yourself believe.

Oh and if you need some understanding of what writing someone about a problem is like: (I'll use Wolf as an example...)

To Wolf's private TMF mailbox:

Hi Wolf,

I just wanted to make sure I didn't cross any lines with you. And that you understand what I was trying to say. I feel I may have upset you and I want to fix it. Did I upset you? Ask me anything! I will certainly try and clarify my words to help make things right between us again.

Sincerly,

Tickle-Gamer

Whatever his response is... go from there. Respectfully. And once again, accept his answer. In life not everything can be fixed. But if you act like a Gentleman about issues... then you will be treated like a Gentleman. (Usually.)

Hope this helps!

~Doll

I suggest utilizing the blog section of this forum.

All these posts you make about yourself seem incredibly self absorbed and dramatic. And it opens yourself up to criticism from the entire forum of which you are not equipped to handle well. Not to mention, they can be read by anyone on the internet. Mitchell can tell you the dangers of posting too many personal threads.

Like I said, rather than using the forum for your diary, maybe blog section is better.

I grew up having to provide for my family because my parents were divorced addicts. I lived with my mom and took care of her, my grandma, and my siblings. Had to drop out of school when i found my homeless dad in a hospital. Took care of him as well, put him through rehab and got him a place while continuing to care for the rest of the fam.

Everyone has a past. Everyone has problems. They just dont all shout them from the rooftops.

I will say, the more independence you gain, the better things get.

All the best,

chicago said:

Everyone has a past. Everyone has problems. They just dont all shout them from the rooftops.

Click to expand...

I'll shout on top of my lungs: "Folks, adopt meeeeeeee....pleeeassee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *&^$#@!"

Ooops.

CapturedDoll said:

Tickle-gamer... I GUARANTEE you no one is thinking about that anymore. And I'm also sure no one thought that much about it to begin with. To reduce your stress you can ask (within the same thread the perceived drama is happening.) "Have I made anyone uncomfortable?" Or... "Are we all on the same page or should I explain further what I meant."

I understand the pressing need to make sure everyone is comfortable with you. But in the future it will always mean more to write the people directly at their mail. Or ask questions like I wrote above. And ACCEPT the answers you are given. Then let it go. There is so much going on in this world already... you only need to clarify and tune your questions better so you don't have to feel so in the dark about how you are being perceived. Less stress for you and everyone around you!

When I say tune... you know how a parent would talk to a child? The most basic questions to receive the most basic answers. Just simplify as much as you can to get the simple responses you are looking for. By doing these threads over and over again... you're actually in danger of making people feel uncomfortable. You are putting them in the spotlight so to speak rather than ask them in private. Help people feel actually comfortable with you by trusting that you are a person that can handle situations as more of a helpful person would. Its easier than you are letting yourself believe.

Click to expand...

I would have wrote Wolf directly, but more people than Wolf and I saw my blow-up. I was just trying to get it out to all that might have saw it [and judging but the view count on Mitch's thread, a lot did see it.].

and, are you saying you have never had so much stress build up that you just exploded?

And, another thing, about my posts being "Self-Absorbed", Don't worry. After this, I plan to take a break from TMF for a while.

I was trying to avoid responding, because my name has been in this thread enough as it is,
but would it help if I said I don't have a problem with you, I'd already forgotten about this incident, and I really don't think anyone else thinks much about it either?

tickle gamer said:

I would have wrote Wolf directly, but more people than Wolf and I saw my blow-up. I was just trying to get it out to all that might have saw it [and judging but the view count on Mitch's thread, a lot did see it.].

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Oh I KNOW why and what you were doing. I was saying these things for the future. So this doesn't become a habit or yours.

and, are you saying you have never had so much stress build up that you just exploded?

Click to expand...

Nope. I've exploded more times than I can count. Which is why I am telling you these things. From experience I speaketh. The difference here is you have time to think before you post. Rebringing this up is in FACT creating drama. Whether you understand that or not. So... I'm giving you tips to avoid doing this again. As others are and will be I'm sure for the rest of the day...

And, another thing, about my posts being "Self-Absorbed", Don't worry. After this, I plan to take a break from TMF for a while.

Click to expand...

I'm sure you meant this directed at Chicago. But... I can read for myself what Chicago wrote:

All these posts you make about yourself seem incredibly self absorbed and dramatic. And it opens yourself up to criticism from the entire forum of which you are not equipped to handle well.

Click to expand...

I will high light the word SEEM. She never said IS. I think you might have an issue with misreading people's words and interpreting them to mean something menacing when they are in fact not meant that way. Rather than take a break from the board... work on reading and rereading what someone has written. It will benefit you immensely. Rather than run from the problem. Or think you are being driven away. You are not being driven away.

If you stop and think about it... Haters are very aggressive in how they write. Nasty wording and volatile. Chicago was trying to point out what your post appears to be. And in that way she was trying to help. Believe me... if she was being hateful I would be the first person to say something. But she isn't being that way and never is. And please remember you might understand better if what she was saying was spoken to you in person. But she cant she's having to write them. So... a lot gets lost in translation on the internet. Before you ASSUME someone is being angry or nasty... ask for clarification please. It will save you a lot of time, stress, and wasted energy.

Wolf said:

I was trying to avoid responding, because my name has been in this thread enough as it is,
but would it help if I said I don't have a problem with you, I'd already forgotten about this incident, and I really don't think anyone else thinks much about it either?

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It cracked me up that you were trying to avoid posting on this thread and then accidentally double posted
Missed you on P&R buddy.

Tickle gamer, it's human nature to assume other people are thinking about us more than they actually are. It happens to most people, myself included. Just try to remember that people aren't losing sleep over posts you make on here, and try not to lose sleep yourself over what other people post about you.

I think everyone can most definitely relate to being overwhelmed with stress. I just think you will recieve the support you need in the blogs section and avoid more of the negative responses.

Sensualswitch10 said:

It cracked me up that you were trying to avoid posting on this thread and then accidentally double posted
Missed you on P&R buddy.

Tickle gamer, it's human nature to assume other people are thinking about us more than they actually are. It happens to most people, myself included. Just try to remember that people aren't losing sleep over posts you make on here, and try not to lose sleep yourself over what other people post about you.

Click to expand...

Exactly. Thanks to the internet people's mind's move on the next topic or news so fast these days. Which is not exactly a good thing in a lot of ways... but... this is part of the good aspect- No one really likes to stay focused on drama or even miscommunication's. They like to move PAST dramas as quickly as possible. Unless they're a hater and those people are fairly easy to spot. No one that's contributed to this thread has that nature.

The only time I hope someone's losing sleep over my posts is that they are too turned on to fall asleep... but that's another topic.

Wolf said:

I was trying to avoid responding, because my name has been in this thread enough as it is,
but would it help if I said I don't have a problem with you, I'd already forgotten about this incident, and I really don't think anyone else thinks much about it either?

Click to expand...

and, I don't have a problem with you ether, Wolf. It's like I tried to explain in the first post on this thread [maybe I didn't get it across well].

It was simply a wrong place, wrong time thing. It was more about me having a stress melt-down than it was about you, and for that, I am sorry .

CapturedDoll said:

I'm sure you meant this directed at Chicago. But... I can read for myself what Chicago wrote:

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oh, My bad. I read all the replies before posting that, I guess they kind of blinded together in my head.

and, about the TMF break deal. I didn't explain myself fully. I meant I'm taking a break to work on some stuff in my personal life, and, maybe, myself. Sorry if it come off like I was mad.

I will still be on some, just not as often.

tickle gamer said:

oh, My bad. I read all the replies before posting that, I guess they kind of blinded together in my head.

and, about the TMF break deal. I didn't explain myself fully. I meant I'm taking a break to work on some stuff in my personal life, and, maybe, myself. Sorry if it come off like I was mad.

I will still be on some, just not as often.

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Ah alright. I understand everything that you wrote. Thank you for the clarications.

I have no clue as to what you are apologizing for. I simply say what I think and feel at the time. I don't bother looking back, no do-overs once it's out there as far as I'm concerned. If you say something, mean it and be willing to defend you stance should the need arise. I don't say anything on here that I wouldn't say to anyone's face. That's the entire problem with texting. it lacks the humanity, physicality and emotion of having a proper discussion in person and reduces everything to just words on a white page that can be taken out of context or interpreted in a myriad of ways. And if you did need to blow off some steam, that's fine as well, we've all been there more than once

Feel sad for you man thepiratebays.so .

tickle gamer said:

Hi All! I know a lot of you saw my latest back-and-forth with Wolf. Well, I thought I would give an explanation as to why I did that [this is not an excuse for it, but].

Now, I know that nobody HAS to believe this, but I swear on my live it's true.

Do any of you know what it's like to be the glue trying to hold your family together?

Like of a morning [every morning], I don't know what I'll be waking up to. In truth, I have woke up to my parents not saying a word to each other, snipping at each other or just full blown world war 3'ing each other.

And, It often falls to me to play mediator.

They [my parents] were split-up once [before I was born], but my grand-parents [being big christens] HAD to get them back together. I wish I could go back in time, and tell my grand-parents what a mistake that was.

And, I don't have a lot of ways to vent my stress. So, I guess it finally hit melt-down level.

In-fact. You know that music video to “Firework” by Katy Perry? I like the song, but I can't watch the vid. Hit's to close to home for me.

That is where video games come into play. Oftentimes, more-or-less, I am playing trying to escape my real life. But, they can only do so much in terms of stress relieve.

Since I “went-off”, I have felt some better.

I am NOT looking for sympathy or pity. Just thought I would put the explanation to what I did on record.

Click to expand...

That being said, everyone has shit, guaranteed, 100% sure, so here's a few guidelines I try to follow now.
1. If you're pissed, it'll come through clearest in writing, you probably won't reach people how you want to, so there's no point in getting wrapped up.

2. People tend to get a lot more pissy with the internet because things that are typically stuck on the internet, in text, are taken more literally than in a conversation. I'll give an example. I got a friend. The guy is OK when he's offline; not the best, but able to make nice and is someone to shoot the shit with (A lot of my "friends" are musicians...sometimes I wish it were gamers, for the record) that I've done for over a decade now. Online? I've never hated facebook messenger much more, because there's always some snippet, some joke posted attempting to trigger, some shitty voice message of some show that's being watched (the humor being that whatever gets produced will inevitably sound like garbage), something that's simply posted in boredom. When trying to filter through the shit....it's infuriating.

3. Real life should be posted in real life. That is to say, what's the human obsession these days with "letting it all hang out"? The easiest thing for me to do, that shouldn't be, is simply disconnect. Shut the wifi off on the phone. Mute the sound on the PC. Hell, take a nap. Or funnily enough, I like listening to the sound of the microwave lately when I'm cooking one of those steamed birdseye meals. And realistically, it's better than creating a new entry in the entertainment series that is most of stuff on the internet.

Nobody thinks about it anymore, but every site is prettymuch connected to a giant fucking chain of servers with dozens of hard-drives stuffed inside in RAID configurations (that is, data that is backed up, that's backing itself up over and over again for redundancy), monitoring everybody and providing "the cloud"...do we really want to know what people on the other end see about what we post? Just an alternate way of thinking. It's too exhausting to be angry with people on a forum.