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Loving it v. hating it

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matt62

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When it comes to getting tickled, some people love it and some people hate it.

The strange thing is, you can be a tickle fetishist, or at least very attracted to tickling, even if you are one of the people who hate it. I am very ticklish and can't bear to be tickled, but I have been fascinated by tickling and found it arousing all my life, maybe for that very reason. I am just grateful that I am a Ler and so can still indulge the fascination without having to get tickled.

But I wonder why some of us find getting tickled pleasurable while others of us find the exact same experience unbearable? I don't mean the people who have no interest in tickling and just find it annoying or unpleasant or juvenile and something to be avoided and forgotten about; I mean people like us who are stimulated by the idea and can't leave it alone even if we hate it.

I would be interested to hear how both types of ticklephile experience it. Presumably we are all experiencing the same basic physical sensations? Is the brain just interpreting them differently? Do you think the difference is neurological, or is it more to do with temperament, personality, or conditioning...? As someone who avoids getting tickled at all costs, I am always fascinated by the ones who seek it out and can't get enough of it.
 
Interesting thread. I think it is really hard to pin point what exactly makes a person tick. Hell, I am 48 years old and still find myself amazed at the things, scenarios, etc that I enjoy. But the best way I know to answer your question is to relate how I feel about the topic.

I love being tickled. And I love to hate it. In other words, I love how vulnerable it makes me feel. I love how it brings me down a few pegs. I love giving up control, a an urge that is not natural for me as I am in a position of power with significant responsibility at work. I love to imagine situations I might hate a bit. Maybe some of the young interns at work gang up on me and tickle me, taking away my authority. The sensation might be too much or too intense, but I need that feeling of helplessness. I need it so badly, even if it humiliates me. Better yet, I like being humiliated as well.

Wow, I am rambling now and feeling kind of well....fill in the blank. Anyway, I guess my point is, that sometimes the tickling can be intense and overwhelming, which I hate. But that need to be helpless, overpowered, and completely giving up control. I NEED that and I LOVE it. And nothing quite gets me there like being tickled. Hopefully that makes sense
 
It seems clear enough that fetishes (unique erotic interests or turn-ons, if you like) are psychological, not physiological. The physical sensation probably is about the same for everyone – what it means to someone that it's happening can vary as much as personalities can.

I sometimes refer to sneezing as an example of a less common but clearly real interest. To most people, sneezing is a slight inconvenience or a refreshing thing; certainly unique in its nature, but a natural and everyday experience we essentially take for granted once we've learned it happens. To a few, undergoing or watching someone else undergo it carries that same deep fascination. When writers write about these things, they make attempts to share by dismantling some internal logic they feel to exist about the situation – discrete from allusions to plain sensation or biological attraction.

For that reason I think just about anything interpersonal could potentially be an erotic interest, which it what makes them so interesting. To explore and play with all of that has always felt to me not like minds exploring bodies, but minds exploring minds.
 
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"Minds exploring minds". Yes, it feels like that is what we are doing, and that is why it is so fascinating and fruitful for us. Interesting thought, Coda.

And Alliekat, your description of how you experience being tickled on the psychological level is also fascinating to me. I don't think I am like that at all, but I have come to realise that a lot of other people are, and it blows my mind. Dare I ask whether you think that your need to experience giving up control might resonate with female sexuality, and my reluctance to give up control is stereotypically male? I know it is more complicated than that because there are plenty of male heterosexual Lees and female heterosexual Lers - but still each of those categories seems to be in a minority for their sex.
 
Good question. I love getting tickled, especially on my feet, even though I can barely stand it. I guess you can say I have a love/hate relationship with it lol
 
sheerfootgrl said:
Good question. I love getting tickled, especially on my feet, even though I can barely stand it. I guess you can say I have a love/hate relationship with it lol
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You see, it fascinates me that you love something that you can "barely stand"! Do you think maybe the part of it that you love is the psychological aspect of loss of control and being dominated, rather than the actual tickling sensation, and the psychological part of it sort of compensates for the physical distress? And if that's the case, do you only get that kick from being tickled, or does it extend to other forms of domination as well?
 
There are documented cases of people who can climax from the sensation of being tickled alone. There are also people who have a less giggly and more sensual response in general to the external stimuli that we describe as tickling. So in that sense, some nervous systems are wired with a sensory predisposition to finding tickling pleasurable in general.

We also know that there is a psychological phenomenon of people who enjoy torment domination discipline submission possibly humiliation or loss of control reversal of roles (yes you Allie kat). This is what we call masochism


Each lee has a blend of the above. Some in the extreme find tickling absolute torture, but love the torture. Others find it absolute pleasure and top from the bottom to maximize pleasurable input. Most exist somewhere in the continuum.
 
Palad said:
There are documented cases of people who can climax from the sensation of being tickled alone. There are also people who have a less giggly and more sensual response in general to the external stimuli that we describe as tickling. So in that sense, some nervous systems are wired with a sensory predisposition to finding tickling pleasurable in general.

We also know that there is a psychological phenomenon of people who enjoy torment domination discipline submission possibly humiliation or loss of control reversal of roles (yes you Allie kat). This is what we call masochism


Each lee has a blend of the above. Some in the extreme find tickling absolute torture, but love the torture. Others find it absolute pleasure and top from the bottom to maximize pleasurable input. Most exist somewhere in the continuum.
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Thanks Palad, that sounds very plausible, and it clarifies my thoughts on the subject.
 
i don't care if they love it or hate it as long as they are laughing
 
I'm a little more towards the other end of the spectrum, in that I'm a lee who genuinely loves the sensation of (some kinds) of tickling. I'm hooked on the unique tingly sensations and the rush of dopamine and my partner will often give me light tickles on my back or feet to relax me after a hard day. I am quite ticklish and more intense tickling can definitely take me to a point of panic and perceived loss of control but even at that point I wouldn't say that I hate it, it's more like pleasurable touch to the point of overstimulation.
So for me anyway, the psychological part of enjoying tickling is less to do with dominance and more to do with attention. It turns me on that someone would want to be careful and deliberate enough with my body to figure out what makes me tick and follow through on it. I love the loss of control that comes with being tickled too but I'm personally turned off/shut down by the idea of pain or humiliation. I think tickling is actually pretty unique in that sense, you can kind of give someone that rush of complete helplessness that's still removed from a lot of the other stuff usually associated with bondage/masochism. (Obviously that varies individual to individual, I know there are plenty of people out there for whom tickling is painful and/or a hard limit, I'm just relating how I experience it).
 
Haptic said:
I'm a little more towards the other end of the spectrum, in that I'm a lee who genuinely loves the sensation of (some kinds) of tickling. I'm hooked on the unique tingly sensations and the rush of dopamine and my partner will often give me light tickles on my back or feet to relax me after a hard day. I am quite ticklish and more intense tickling can definitely take me to a point of panic and perceived loss of control but even at that point I wouldn't say that I hate it, it's more like pleasurable touch to the point of overstimulation.
So for me anyway, the psychological part of enjoying tickling is less to do with dominance and more to do with attention. It turns me on that someone would want to be careful and deliberate enough with my body to figure out what makes me tick and follow through on it. I love the loss of control that comes with being tickled too but I'm personally turned off/shut down by the idea of pain or humiliation. I think tickling is actually pretty unique in that sense, you can kind of give someone that rush of complete helplessness that's still removed from a lot of the other stuff usually associated with bondage/masochism. (Obviously that varies individual to individual, I know there are plenty of people out there for whom tickling is painful and/or a hard limit, I'm just relating how I experience it).
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Interesting to get your experience from the "other end of the spectrum", which in a way further confirms the existence of the spectrum and that we have the two ends of the spectrum worked out right! Also interesting that you mention the "attention" aspect. That is a bit of a theme that has sometimes come through in other threads too.
 
I'm a mix of loving and loving to hate it. I love how being tickled feels (physical and the chemical release) and I love to hate the helplessness of it. (But it's not to where I actually hate any aspect of being tickled. It kind of reminds me of hating characters on a tv show or a book. Like I'm annoyed at them, but not enough to stop reading/watching, and that's part of the fun because I've got that emotional connection).
 
laughstorelax said:
I'm a mix of loving and loving to hate it. I love how being tickled feels (physical and the chemical release) and I love to hate the helplessness of it. (But it's not to where I actually hate any aspect of being tickled. It kind of reminds me of hating characters on a tv show or a book. Like I'm annoyed at them, but not enough to stop reading/watching, and that's part of the fun because I've got that emotional connection).
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I am intrigued when people say they love the feeling of being tickled. They must be so much more laid-back and relaxed than I am. I can imagine how it could be perceived as pleasurable, but in my case the strength of my psychological response to being overpowered is so overwhelming and resistant that it swamps any physical enjoyment from the tickling sensation itself.
 
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