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Tickling without tying / Realistic tickle fantasies

TicklishGigglee

1st Level Red Feather
Joined
Mar 2, 2014
Messages
1,080
Points
36
So, after having been active in the forum for a fairly long time now (I'm guessing it's almost 3 years), this is going to be the first thread that I am starting.

So far during my interactions with most ticklers, I have noticed the following:

i) They want the ticklee to be submissive
ii) They want to tie her up as immobile as possible
iii) They want to tickle her for hours together
iv) Their fantasies are mostly non-consensual.

Now these expectations and fantasies are perfectly normal, and nothing to negatively judge a tickler for. We all have our share of weirdness, for some people, tickling fetish itself would seem weird. But then I would like responses from ticklers on the following:

i) Is the idea of tickling a confident ticklee who acts as an equal in bed not exciting enough?
ii) Is tying really a compulsion? Would you not want to experience the reaction of the ticklee to your tickling in its entirety?
iii) Can you seriously tickle a truly ticklish person for hours without causing some real harm to them? I guess a tickler would want to tickle a ticklee for fun, not to cause any harm.
iv) Non-consensual tickle fantasies such as interrogation and kidnapping are similar to rape fantasies -- people have them, but acting on them isn't possible without violating the law in most countries, and it being a really bad thing to do in general. Would be interesting to know if ticklers would share any actionable, realistic, consensual tickle fantasies?
 
For me I prefer consensual tickling. I myself have to be restrained becacuse my feet are so ticklish. I dont eish to kick my tickler. But if a person can take and enjoys hours long tickling like I do, then its ok

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This is something I've thought about often so I'm going to give my perspective on it.
First off, from personal experience I believe that all the readily-available tickle pornography (yes, it is porn) has helped make it so a regular, less intense, unrestrained tickle session is no longer enough to satisfy or even arouse a person who is too conditioned to seeking pleasure primarily from tickle videos etc. I believe this is why you're noticing these types of fantasies being so common. Another major problem with this is that if you aren't careful, you will start to objectify a 'lee as "just a person to tickle," and not a real person. This may seem slightly off topic but it's something to watch out for within yourself. But like I said this is all just my opinion.
To answer your questions,
i. I don't always prefer a lee to be submissive necessarily, as long as they are at least consenting or it isn't violating in any way. There is something about tickling a girl who is resisting that is much more exciting than a girl who will just lay there and take it.
ii. This changes for me as a got older. For one I feel that girls complain about being tickled too roughly, and I believe having them tied up can help you be more gentle without the added element of wrestling around with them etc. Not to mention less chance of the lee hurting the ler, or hurting themselves. I always feel bad when I tickle someone and she bangs her elbow or something accidentally. But I also train jiu-jitsu so at the same time it is fun for me to tickle-wrestle because I can have the control enough to keep it gentle as well. Again, I think the compulsion for bondage comes from how common it is in our videos etc
iii. This comes down to consent for me I think. As long as no harm is being done, physically or emotionally, I could probably tickle someone forever lol
iv. I haven't had many personal tickling experiences myself really, but I have been learning too keep my fantasies more realistic. I don't necessarily have any to share but I appreciate this post a lot and I think it should give some of the more self-reflective people here something to examine.
 
This is something I've thought about often so I'm going to give my perspective on it.
First off, from personal experience I believe that all the readily-available tickle pornography (yes, it is porn) has helped make it so a regular, less intense, unrestrained tickle session is no longer enough to satisfy or even arouse a person who is too conditioned to seeking pleasure primarily from tickle videos etc. I believe this is why you're noticing these types of fantasies being so common. Another major problem with this is that if you aren't careful, you will start to objectify a 'lee as "just a person to tickle," and not a real person. This may seem slightly off topic but it's something to watch out for within yourself. But like I said this is all just my opinion.
To answer your questions,
i. I don't always prefer a lee to be submissive necessarily, as long as they are at least consenting or it isn't violating in any way. There is something about tickling a girl who is resisting that is much more exciting than a girl who will just lay there and take it.
ii. This changes for me as a got older. For one I feel that girls complain about being tickled too roughly, and I believe having them tied up can help you be more gentle without the added element of wrestling around with them etc. Not to mention less chance of the lee hurting the ler, or hurting themselves. I always feel bad when I tickle someone and she bangs her elbow or something accidentally. But I also train jiu-jitsu so at the same time it is fun for me to tickle-wrestle because I can have the control enough to keep it gentle as well. Again, I think the compulsion for bondage comes from how common it is in our videos etc
iii. This comes down to consent for me I think. As long as no harm is being done, physically or emotionally, I could probably tickle someone forever lol
iv. I haven't had many personal tickling experiences myself really, but I have been learning too keep my fantasies more realistic. I don't necessarily have any to share but I appreciate this post a lot and I think it should give some of the more self-reflective people here something to examine.

Thanks for the sensible response :)
 
So, after having been active in the forum for a fairly long time now (I'm guessing it's almost 3 years), this is going to be the first thread that I am starting.

So far during my interactions with most ticklers, I have noticed the following:

i) They want the ticklee to be submissive
Submissive is ok, but as I recently told a friend from the community, there's nothing hotter than tickle wrecking a beautiful badass chick. I was fortunate enough to get to do that multiple times at NEST.

ii) They want to tie her up as immobile as possible
Yes!!! To better access those sensitive spots lol.

iii) They want to tickle her for hours together
Depends on the lee and the situation. Usually I'm tickling women who aren't from this community and it's more about foreplay and making sexy time more fun.

iv) Their fantasies are mostly non-consensual.
Maybe for some people, but I'm not sure if it's most people or most fantasies.

Now these expectations and fantasies are perfectly normal, and nothing to negatively judge a tickler for. We all have our share of weirdness, for some people, tickling fetish itself would seem weird. But then I would like responses from ticklers on the following:

i) Is the idea of tickling a confident ticklee who acts as an equal in bed not exciting enough?
Actually, that's my favorite. I was lucky enough to top a former professional Domme recently and it was amazing!

ii) Is tying really a compulsion? Would you not want to experience the reaction of the ticklee to your tickling in its entirety?
The tying allows me to more effectively focus on the tickling, not use half of my concentration (and body) on the rasslin.

iii) Can you seriously tickle a truly ticklish person for hours without causing some real harm to them? I guess a tickler would want to tickle a ticklee for fun, not to cause any harm.
Tickling someone for hours may sound like fun, but in practice it can be pretty exhausting. My poor hands were quite sore after NEST. And I most definitely don't want to harm my lees. That's what safe words are for.

iv) Non-consensual tickle fantasies such as interrogation and kidnapping are similar to rape fantasies -- people have them, but acting on them isn't possible without violating the law in most countries, and it being a really bad thing to do in general. Would be interesting to know if ticklers would share any actionable, realistic, consensual tickle fantasies?
Personally not into the non con. The idea of someone being actually frightened of me or repulsed by me is a rather large turn off. Maybe a friend who's been a little overly sassy and finds herself in a compromising position...
 
So, after having been active in the forum for a fairly long time now (I'm guessing it's almost 3 years), this is going to be the first thread that I am starting.

So far during my interactions with most ticklers, I have noticed the following:

i) They want the ticklee to be submissive
ii) They want to tie her up as immobile as possible
iii) They want to tickle her for hours together
iv) Their fantasies are mostly non-consensual.

Congrats on your first post - it's a great one!
I've been fairly active in the community since the 90's and interestingly enough - in regards to your above-stated interactions, I've noticed myself about lady lees:
They have been primarily ANYTHING BUT submissive, even though they truly love or love/hate being tickled senseless;
Roughly 50% want immobile restraint and 50% REALLY want to be pinned down by their 'ler;
Sometimes they want extended tickling (hours) and sometimes they want a quicker super intense tickling, often to the point of tears;
Non-con has a definite appeal, but the logistics of practical application really preclude it from happening.
Just my 2 cents of what I've noticed personally.

i) Is the idea of tickling a confident ticklee who acts as an equal in bed not exciting enough?
ii) Is tying really a compulsion? Would you not want to experience the reaction of the ticklee to your tickling in its entirety?
iii) Can you seriously tickle a truly ticklish person for hours without causing some real harm to them? I guess a tickler would want to tickle a ticklee for fun, not to cause any harm.
iv) Non-consensual tickle fantasies such as interrogation and kidnapping are similar to rape fantasies -- people have them, but acting on them isn't possible without violating the law in most countries, and it being a really bad thing to do in general. Would be interesting to know if ticklers would share any actionable, realistic, consensual tickle fantasies?

In the tickling sense, I've never thought in terms of dom/sub. It's all about whether they have that 'lee "crave to be tickled";
I adore tickling without restraint. Of course I love tickling with restraint. Some 'lees, it's non-negotiable because of reactions;
There are many different degrees of tickle - it's not too difficult to tickle the extremely ticklish for multiple hours, so long as vitals are watched;
I think interrogation and punishment (funishment) scenarios are super exciting because they play into the same kinda love/hate dynamic of tickling period, i.e. you love being tickled, but while being tickled, you try and stop it. True non-con on the other hand has never appealed to me.
 
i) Is the idea of tickling a confident ticklee who acts as an equal in bed not exciting enough?

To each his own.

ii) Is tying really a compulsion? Would you not want to experience the reaction of the ticklee to your tickling in its entirety?

It's not really a compulsion, unless you want to get kicked on the face out of involuntarily reaction.


iii) Can you seriously tickle a truly ticklish person for hours without causing some real harm to them? I guess a tickler would want to tickle a ticklee for fun, not to cause any harm.

No is my answer.

iv) Non-consensual tickle fantasies such as interrogation and kidnapping are similar to rape fantasies -- people have them, but acting on them isn't possible without violating the law in most countries, and it being a really bad thing to do in general. Would be interesting to know if ticklers would share any actionable, realistic, consensual tickle fantasies?

Practically, no matter what you do, a fantasy remains a fantasy. There is only some intimate acceptance of simulated fantasies. There is a barrier to keep up with life (legally) as it is. No matter how proud you claim to have crossed the line, ignorance backed up by arrogance simply won't save the day. If you can still walk freely down the road, it means, you did not wrong anyone so bad just yet.
 
I have noticed the following [about lers...]
...
I would like responses from ticklers on the following:
I wouldn't expect a ler to come up and serve as the ambassador for their half of the tickling scene.

Expect a variety of answers.

i) Is the idea of tickling a confident ticklee who acts as an equal in bed not exciting enough?
If you replace "tickling" with sex here, it's basically the difference between vanilla sex or sex incorporating power exchange. Some people like it. Some don't. Different lers and lees are come at the kink from different angles.

Also, different people respond more favorably to different personality traits, even outside the context of tickling. Some lers like an easy time and someone who happily takes it; others like a bit of fight; yet others like the sense of taking someone down a peg, and specifically have fantasies about tickling someone sexually dominant or otherwise in a position of power.


ii) Is tying really a compulsion? Would you not want to experience the reaction of the ticklee to your tickling in its entirety?
It's not an inherent compulsion. It's a secondary kink for some, but pragmatism for others.

Tying has uses, even for people who don't have bondage as a kink:
  • It can help keep both the lee and ler safe, especially during intense stimulation.
  • It can prevent the lee from depriving themselves of certain sensations.
  • It lends to a sense of helplessness, which some people enjoy.
  • It can make it easier for a lee or ler to stay in a certain position, depending on the bondage setup.
  • As sensualswitch10 mentioned, it can free up ler concentration and limbs.


iii) Can you seriously tickle a truly ticklish person for hours without causing some real harm to them? I guess a tickler would want to tickle a ticklee for fun, not to cause any harm.
Depends on how you play. I've done sessions running for a few hours. It wasn't a specific goal—we just had fun and lost track of time: we included breaks, periods of lower intensity stimulation, and mixed in different types of play. The duration just sort of extended organically, as a natural result of our pace.

I suppose that for some, the sense of tickling being overwhelming for a long time and overloading/burning the lee out might be a source of appeal, but that's not how I tick, and I'm not sure how realistic it is. As a ler, the thought of a lee kind of burning out and losing consciousness or variation in reaction isn't really appealing. But, that said, not all extended play necessarily produces that effect or has a strong link to that form of predicament.

Also, I want to come back to "a truly ticklish person." There are people who really enjoy being tickled, but who aren't necessarily exceedingly ticklish. They get to have fun too. (Some lees are even insecure about their levels of sensitivity being too low.)


iv) Non-consensual tickle fantasies such as interrogation and kidnapping are similar to rape fantasies -- people have them, but acting on them isn't possible without violating the law in most countries, and it being a really bad thing to do in general. Would be interesting to know if ticklers would share any actionable, realistic, consensual tickle fantasies?
I'm not personally interested in true non-con.

I can see the appeal of a lee offering some resistance (if only a token amount) provided they enjoy themselves. It's especially fun if they get aroused despite themselves. Mentioning this as related to non-con, in that it shares the core component of resistance, while not violating consent itself.

It's not a specific fantasy of mine, but it's something I figured you might find interesting due to similarity, and I've seen it pop up as a theme in tickling media.
 
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i) Is the idea of tickling a confident ticklee who acts as an equal in bed not exciting enough?
First, great post and questions! To answer your first, no. There are many kinds of exciting lees!

ii) Is tying really a compulsion? Would you not want to experience the reaction of the ticklee to your tickling in its entirety?
For me, tying is not really a compulsion at all. It's mainly about tickling! My wife and I sometimes use bondage, but often not.

iii) Can you seriously tickle a truly ticklish person for hours without causing some real harm to them? I guess a tickler would want to tickle a ticklee for fun, not to cause any harm.
For me, that's not realistic. She gets tired! For me it's only exciting as long as we're BOTH having fun.

iv) Non-consensual tickle fantasies such as interrogation and kidnapping are similar to rape fantasies -- people have them, but acting on them isn't possible without violating the law in most countries, and it being a really bad thing to do in general. Would be interesting to know if ticklers would share any actionable, realistic, consensual tickle fantasies?
Think I get this, but also disagree. For me it's not about power or domination, it's all about the lee's reactions. When a light touch makes her giggle or moan it's incredibly sexy. When she gets super ticklish and goes crazy, it gets even hotter, plus extremely fun! That her reactions surprise and excite her is even better. Our play is all about letting her reactions guide us to the best fit for our moods each time. That said, sometimes she's initially feeling bad or not playful, for various reasons (like we all do). Yet trying to tickle anyway sometimes works. It can be magical. If I try anyway, suddenly the right tickle can change her from negative to giggling, cute, and sooo irresistible! I can totally understand wanting to have that effect on someone who was initially non-consenting.
 
Immobile bondage is the most important thing to me. I hate videos with bad or no bondage.
 
My responses below.

So, after having been active in the forum for a fairly long time now (I'm guessing it's almost 3 years), this is going to be the first thread that I am starting.

So far during my interactions with most ticklers, I have noticed the following:

i) They want the ticklee to be submissive
ii) They want to tie her up as immobile as possible
iii) They want to tickle her for hours together
iv) Their fantasies are mostly non-consensual.

Now these expectations and fantasies are perfectly normal, and nothing to negatively judge a tickler for. We all have our share of weirdness, for some people, tickling fetish itself would seem weird. But then I would like responses from ticklers on the following:

i) Is the idea of tickling a confident ticklee who acts as an equal in bed not exciting enough?---Lers that I've been with or chatted with mostly have wanted me to be submissive/consensual. I think it's because truly most lers don't often get to tickle someone who wants it.

ii) Is tying really a compulsion? Would you not want to experience the reaction of the ticklee to your tickling in its entirety?---For me, being tied or restrained is of course a fun aspect and more wickedly thrilling, but Im so short Im easy to pin down, etc. I like the idea of a guy using his body or strength to pin me down or sit on me, seems realistic too.

iii) Can you seriously tickle a truly ticklish person for hours without causing some real harm to them? I guess a tickler would want to tickle a ticklee for fun, not to cause any harm.----Never been tickled for hours but I lose it pretty quickly lol. So I can imagine what being tickled for hours would do. Not sure about harm but I'd be exhausted for sure.

iv) Non-consensual tickle fantasies such as interrogation and kidnapping are similar to rape fantasies -- people have them, but acting on them isn't possible without violating the law in most countries, and it being a really bad thing to do in general. Would be interesting to know if ticklers would share any actionable, realistic, consensual tickle fantasies?---I think most real life, non fetish tickling (meaning tickling done by siblings, friends, etc is non consent anyway. I was tickled nonconsentually for over a year in a relationship and while it was torture for me it also gave birth to the fetish/thrill for me. Most lers that I've talked to have easily said if they could tickle someone against their will and not be held accountable for it, they'd do it in a heartbeat.
 
Maybe its just from fun tickles as a kid but i dont need tie downs or bondage. Heck I never knew about any of that stuff until the day I found the TMF. Id still rather it still be fun and consensual. a fun experience for both lee and ler.
 
Well, tying helps you physically maintain a position you otherwise cannot under tickling pressure. I would imagine a 'lee can find this appealing as well. It's the only way a 'lee can endure that much tickling. How else could you keep your armpits exposed for so long (for example)? Otherwise I don't think it's a must and I understand and respect one rather would not want it. Trust is also a big factor here, but that's also the case (though less so) without bondage. Then there's always physical strength and overpowering the 'lee. ;)

Otherwise I'm also for realism in tickling and especially consent. This is why I find some tickling drawings where a 'lee gets tormented for many hours a turnoff due to not realistic. I'm neither a fan of very harsh tickling from the start. Rather have 'lee 'ease into it', preferably in such a way she can endure it longer and then drive up the pressure. Gently push a 'lee to her limits, make her lose her mind, but never to the point she's in pain. Rather that she's secretly proud of enduring so much tickling and wanting to last. That's the situation I want to reach.
 
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Haven't tied anyone, always did it unrestrained. Thought it would be cool tho.
 
Maybe its just from fun tickles as a kid but i dont need tie downs or bondage. Heck I never knew about any of that stuff until the day I found the TMF. Id still rather it still be fun and consensual. a fun experience for both lee and ler.

My sentiments exactly.
 
My experiences being tickled have almost always been without any bondage or formal restraints, and that's my favorite kind of scenario -- yes, I try like hell to get away, and it's a chaotic scene, but if the tickler succeeds in besting me (and she often does) just through a combination of her persistence, her ingenuity, and the severity of my ticklishness, that's more fun -- and, ultimately, more humbling, I think, than if someone drives you to fits of begging when you're already tied up and helpless. In a sense, the unbound experience renders me at least as submissive, in a sense, as the alternative, and with my desperate efforts to evade and escape it's got a real edge of non-consensuality.

Plus, it's usually playful, and often funny, and frequently different in how it plays out than all the other times I've been tickled silly. I highly recommend it.
 
Another great post from you! I always enjoy reading your perspective. It's so refreshing to see someone write about tickling in a realistic way.
 
Tying up is still great, but with leaving room to squirm about. But the also like the idea if a ridicilously ticklish lee to be rendered unable to close her armpits. But there are trick to render a non-tied-up lee unable to make the tickling stop even after closing armpits.

Either way, one should know a lee's limits and without bondage one can get make the tickling an intense experience the same. Still, even if you were tied down and at my mercy, I would respect limit. But oh god, it would be intense indeed.
 
I've (almost) never been tied up, though I've been rendered helpless via tickling countless times. And I think there's something about the untied scenario I prefer -- the fact that I could get away (and occasionally I do, though it's hard to elude a truly persistent tickler) but she manages to defeat me through the sheer power of my own ticklishness.
 
But there are trick to render a non-tied-up lee unable to make the tickling stop even after closing armpits.
I love it when the lee closes her armpits with my fingers already there tickling them and she can't do anything about it :) This renders them totally helpless and powerless.
 
Does trapping the lee's ankles under one arm like a headlock count?
 
Yeah, I guess I was classifying temporary immobilization under a separate category from being tied up. I've had my feet immobilized, or my arm pinned over my head, or someone sitting on me with unfettered access to my sides and stomach, and that sense of helplessness does create a giddy madness that's nearly intolerable. But it's a condition that lasts only as long as the person is pinning or holding or sitting on you, which is a little different I think from being tied up and just unconditionally at a tickler's mercy (which, like I said, is not a big part of my experience, but it seems like it would drive me insane).
 
Indeed, a great first post. First, I would disagree that most people here are into nonconsensual, at least publicly, and I've been on here since 2002. As for the bondage and submission aspects, it can be a very delicate balance. Some lers and lees are big on "the scene" and need certain aspects to be in place. For instance, I prefer tickling women on couches, with her clothed and barefoot, likely because many of my earliest encounters involved this. I don't require bondage to "get off," but prefer it with upper-body. However, I like watching F-F tickling bondage videos with the lee naked, for the more chaotic aspects, i.e., the "scene." However, sometimes I prefer more spontaneity, or surprise tickles, like feet grabbing on a couch, or "sleepy" tickles. Also, "submissive" is relative. The lee can "submit" willingly if she gets turned on by submitting and wants to be "dominated" through tickling, wants the feeling of sensations that drive her crazy. I think most lers get off on the lee's reactions, so in that sense, the lee has much more power than one might think.
 
I) As one of the old posts said, there are many kinds of exciting lees. And that's plenty for me.
II) Restraint makes tickling more fun, but it's not a necessity. Though if the lee has a kicking reflex or something, it's best to have them tied so you don't get hurt either.
III) Depends what their limit is, but it's definitely possible to cause harm eventually. I've seen a few people say that seeing a distressed lee turns them on, but it's certainly not a turn-on for me. I want for both of us to enjoy the experience.
IV) I have a few realistic fantasies, but my favorite one is the idea of breaking a "tough guy" kind of person. They'll do something like insist they're not ticklish or try really hard not to laugh, but fail to hold it in. By "breaking", I don't mean pushing them past the breaking point, just getting a satisfying reaction out of them.
 
So, after having been active in the forum for a fairly long time now (I'm guessing it's almost 3 years), this is going to be the first thread that I am starting.

So far during my interactions with most ticklers, I have noticed the following:

i) They want the ticklee to be submissive
ii) They want to tie her up as immobile as possible
iii) They want to tickle her for hours together
iv) Their fantasies are mostly non-consensual.

I think it's worth mentioning that every community has a Vocal, Extreme Minority - you see it in politics, religion, identity-groups, and here. Your premise lines up with the contents of the Stories and Discussion boards, but is probably misrepresentative of the overall population.

I've been to play parties, public dungeons, talked with plenty of ticklers and ticklees personally, and have been involved in the scene since about 2000. To give you a different point of view, my experience shows a predictable bell curve with the narrow ends being deeply sadistic or entirely playful and the thick center being shorter scenes with playful, bratty, consensual-but-intense, positive-vibe ticklees with both submissive and dominant streaks.

(Also, "confident" is not the opposite of "submissive" - there are plenty of confident submissives and insecure dominant in the community).
 
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