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Relationship issues [emoji853]

cjjericho84

TMF Poster
Joined
Feb 5, 2013
Messages
106
Points
16
Hi,

I think you guys are the only people in the world I can talk to about this stuff....

I have been with my partner for 8 years, we have a perfect family life, 2 incredible children a nice house, good social Ives and go on great family holidays together etc...

However the past year has been sexually difficult for us both as my gf if fed up with my feet and tickling fetish. It has been off limit for about a year.

I have been honest with her and we have had mature conversations about it, but it seems like it will be off limits for the foreseeable future.

She absolutely hates both fetishes and has grown tired of it over the years.

I spend way too much time on c4s and every tickling related website. I have almost dried up the entire web of content!!!!!

Has anyone else been through this? Am I making any sense?

Has anyone else been through



Sent from my Moto G (5) using Tapatalk
 
As with everything, moderation is key. If you are tickle-obsessed, and bugging her about it, it's only going to make things worse. On the other hand, her ignoring a fundamental part of who you are is creating a negative feedback loop. The more she ignores your needs, the stronger your needs feel. Communication is everything, and while you said you have talked about it, the solution to the problem cannot be your fetish being 'off limits'. It's a part of you, and it's a part of your sexual nature, and that is key to any relationship. You must have your needs met, and so must she. I strongly suggest you go to couple's counselling. If you truly love one another, you will have to find a way to make it work. I hope everything turns out well for y'all.
 
I understand your pain and I know its sucks but you need to decide which is more tickling or your wife. Don't just answer now think long and hard weigh the pros and cons.either way your happiness is in your court now my friend
 
Been married 37 yrs. Wife knows I'm into tickling, but she isn't (and I'm on the sites....I'm here, no?) . I try every now and then, but don't get very far. Even try to get her to tickle me, to no avail. So which is more important to me?
 
Been married 37 yrs. Wife knows I'm into tickling, but she isn't (and I'm on the sites....I'm here, no?) . I try every now and then, but don't get very far. Even try to get her to tickle me, to no avail. So which is more important to me?

See that's what I don't understand. I get that most people aren't into being tickled, or outright hate it. But why would someone not be willing to tickle their partner, if they knew their SO enjoyed it.
For example I'm not into spanking but I dated a woman who got aroused by being spanked. So I whipped her cute little butt until it was raw, because I knew she was into it. People who refuse to accomodate their SO's kink(as long as it doesn't cause pain or discomfort to the first person) are selfish partners.
 
I can only scratch maybe 5% of the issue. But: Do you know of any "unusual" things your wife likes? If you have never thought about that question, then question yourself why not. Have you tried to find out but she wouldn't answer? If so, maybe she has something, but she is so embarassed about it to even admit it to herself. Golden shower, humiliation, anal, face sit, feeding, whatever!

I think putting your needs - just for a while - in the background and focus on what she needs might help a lot. If you find something she has been dreaming about and make her happy in a totally new way she might come back and give you what you would love to have from her.

I hope it will work out for both of you.
 
Thanks for the replies peeps, I don't want to have an off limits fetish for the rest of my life, she is very vanilla not into anything out of the norm. I don't want to end up doing anything stupid [emoji53]

Sent from my Moto G (5) using Tapatalk
 
This is why sexual compatibility is important when choosing a partner. It saves a lot of hurt feelings.
 
If she is tired of being tickled maybe let her strap u down and tickle the bejeebers out of you. She might like that.

Sent from my LG-H910 using Tapatalk
 
I'm in a similar situation to a lot of folks here. I am married, my wife is extremely ticklish, and hates tickling in all its forms. Of course, it doesn't mean I don't think about it....
 
I have to wonder if there are other relationship issues at play here. To suddenly become fed up with your fetishes after 8 years doesn't pass the "smell test" in my opinion. Oftentimes sexual rejection is the first thing to go wrong when a relationship goes off track. I would suggest reflecting on how your relationship as a whole has been going lately and then circle back to the specific issue of fetish indulgence. Good luck to you!
 
Been married 37 yrs. Wife knows I'm into tickling, but she isn't (and I'm on the sites....I'm here, no?) . I try every now and then, but don't get very far. Even try to get her to tickle me, to no avail. So which is more important to me?

You put a ring on it too soon I'm afraid.

These issues lead to people cheating. I think people here need to find out within the first year if they can indulge their fetish at least sometimes. If it is an absolute no-go, then in my opinion (this is just me) but I would never stay in that relationship. I told my girlfriend after a few months. I waited until we got close, dropped the bombshell and waited to see how she would react. If she was going to cut me off from what I love then I was fully prepared to walk away. She didn't and now I know I would never cheat/leave because I get what I need sexually and emotionally too of course. If I didn't, I would be frustrated and leave eventually.

I have one life, it shall be full of tickles.
 
I have to wonder if there are other relationship issues at play here. To suddenly become fed up with your fetishes after 8 years doesn't pass the "smell test" in my opinion. Oftentimes sexual rejection is the first thing to go wrong when a relationship goes off track. I would suggest reflecting on how your relationship as a whole has been going lately and then circle back to the specific issue of fetish indulgence. Good luck to you!

Well since she was never really into tickling in the first place, it's not a real stretch for the OP's wife to shut him down completely. People change during marriages and long term relationships. If they didn't nobody would ever get divorced.
 
It's too important to me not to bring up within the first few weeks with a romantic interest. I guage their reaction and figure out if I wanna stay or not.

Luckily, I've no longer had to deal with this since finding the best bf ever on this very site. Took some effort as the relationship was long distance for a time, but the moral of the story is no one should feel like they have to settle. Better to be unhappy by yourself and trying to find something than stuck in an unsatisfying relationship.
 
You put a ring on it too soon I'm afraid.
These issues lead to people cheating. I think people here need to find out within the first year if they can indulge their fetish at least sometimes. If it is an absolute no-go, then in my opinion (this is just me) but I would never stay in that relationship. I told my girlfriend after a few months. I waited until we got close, dropped the bombshell and waited to see how she would react. If she was going to cut me off from what I love then I was fully prepared to walk away. She didn't and now I know I would never cheat/leave because I get what I need sexually and emotionally too of course. If I didn't, I would be frustrated and leave eventually.
I have one life, it shall be full of tickles.

I think it's a bit unfair to say someone "put a ring on it too soon"; it's not like there was a lot of normalization of fetishes in 1980, or very many ways to find out that it wasn't nearly as weird as one might think.
 
Thanks Wolf, I was gonna reply with pretty much the same thing.
 
I would have to agree with Sensualswitch. If she didn't have a problem with it before, but she does now, then there is another issue involved. Even if she really wasn't in to it before but let you tickle her, it was because she wanted to make you happy. Now she doesn't want to make you happy and that says there is an underlying problem. I suggest you figure out what it is. It may not and probably does not involve play time or bedroom activities. Look at everything else.
 
You will always be miserable without indulging in your tickle fetish. She's wrong to cut you off and not help you with ideas on how to satisfy your needs. It's a recipe for disaster. She needs to know that the family unit is in peril.
 
You will always be miserable without indulging in your tickle fetish. She's wrong to cut you off and not help you with ideas on how to satisfy your needs. It's a recipe for disaster. She needs to know that the family unit is in peril.

To be fair, we're only getting one side of the story, as we usually do when someone posts about a partner not having an interest, or losing interest in the fetish.
So far, I haven't heard any mention of her needs. Maybe that's part of the problem.
 
It's too important to me not to bring up within the first few weeks with a romantic interest. I guage their reaction and figure out if I wanna stay or not.

Yep. These days, I'll bring it up before things get too serious.

Tough situation, OP
 
Like Sensual said, its probably another underlying issue, if she didn't mind the fetish first and then decided now she hates it, maybe its something else that is stopping her/preventing her wanting to indulge/get intimate.

dated a few guys from here, on and off but it never worked out but am now with a wonderful guy, within the first month I told him I liked it and I asked him if it was a problem, and he said he was totally up for trying it and now we do it so often. Its a wonderful way to bond, but if he suddenly decided he didn't want to, i'd think its more an issue with me than the tickling.
 
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