Kind of Scared That Tickling Will Ruin My Career

Sketcher92 · Sep 29, 2017

Hi. Anyone who reads this, hope you're well. Also, sincere apologies for going on a tangent.

I'm an artist, hoping to "make it" and begin a career out in Los Angeles (so, in other words, I'm a total dumbass). Of course, I'm not having much luck - God knows how difficult it is to break into the entertainment industries. So for the past few months, in order to supplement my income, I thought I would try coming on this website for the first time and offering my services as a fetish artist. Besides, I'd had a tickle fetish for as long as I could remember, and was aching for a way to express it with other people, not just be trapped alone with it.

Thankfully, it's gone very well. But possibly too well.

Tons of generous people have paid me to draw tickling stuff for them, especially once I was dragged into the FurAffinity community (that last part either makes complete sense or is deeply unfortunate, depending on who you ask. I'm not a furry, but I've somehow gotten pretty popular over there, and relatively quickly. Hey, go where you get opportunities, right?) Now, I love drawing tickling, I'm very thankful for the business, and I've made some genuine online friends and met great people in the past few months because of all this. But make no mistake: I initially started doing this because I was desperate for money. And it's worked. It's helped me survive out here. However, this also concerns me.

See, as you might reasonably guess, this place is my double life. I keep my fetish as locked-away from my everyday living as possible. No one can know about this. Many of you can understand. And the more popular my tickling art gets, the closer I come to my two lives colliding. Sooner or later, a fan of my tickling work is bound to come across my portfolio, or the webcomic that I'm attempting to get off the ground, or anything else like that, and realize who I am. And that terrifies me. My career could be ruined before it starts. The shame and embarrassment of being "outed" would be unbearable.

And here's the other thing - I know that this is stupid and selfish, but I don't want to be some nobody artist working on storyboards for other people for the rest of his life. I want to be somebody. I want to be another Tim Burton or Frank Miller and create something that leaves a mark on the world. And I typically don't think very highly of myself, but some delusional part of me really believes that I could be a successful and well-known artist if given the chance to prove it. I'm ambitious, not an egomaniac.
On the slim off-chance that this ever happens, it's extremely likely that a client will recognize my work. And the longer this goes on, the more likely that becomes.

On the one hand, I'm desperate and need to support myself financially in any way possible. But on the other, this just becomes more and more of a risk every single day. I feel trapped, nervous, and unsure of what to do. I guess what I'm trying to ask is...have I already gone too far? Was this a mistake? Should I be ashamed of this? Should I stop?
You can nuke your webpages out of existence as hard as you want, but nothing on the internet disappears forever.

Although, Rebecca Sugar drew blatant child pornography, and she still miraculously has a job/created Stephen Universe, so perhaps I have nothing to worry about.

(As a side note, this fear is also why I haven't uploaded any pictures of myself or other info to this website. Which is really hindering my ability to meet up with other people who share my fetish. I'd love the opportunity to openly share this important part of my life with someone, but I'm terrified of what will happen if I post my face here. And that's kind of an important step when proving to other people that you're not a creep. Attempts to use FetLife have been unsuccessful. Not that any of this is relevant.)

What do you guys think I should do?

...Sorry. I'm such a selfish dickhead.

The Tickle Room · Sep 29, 2017

I used to be worried about my career and wore a mask while producing I also realize this would creep out my models and kind of hurt my audience. Eventually I took the mask off and decided to just live life and do what I have to do you should never be judged on the decisions you make as a person and what you decide to do. So if I were you I would just do what you have to do and keep it to yourself in the people that you trust and if someone finds out about it and your professional career simply State this is what I do on my private time under a different Alias it doesn't connect to me and it shouldn't

Myriads · Sep 29, 2017

There have been a long list of artists that have done adult oriented material over the years and had no issues. A fair number of named comic book artists have their little secrets.

You use a pseudo when you draw porn, and that is more then enough of a cover for anyone who thinks they recognize you. You can deny.

Don't worry over it much. You need the income, and its there. And in the realm of what people have done in Hollywood to tread water til they make it, drawing Furry-tickling porn (Applejack! no!) is small potatoes.

Just don't get too cute with your duel identity. You can't come out to play in public and take credit. You are either anon, or out.

Myriads

Tenebrae · Sep 29, 2017

I really understand your concern. In the course of my studies I met some people who wanted to pursue political careers, and were afraid that their fantasies would somehow turn them into laughing stocks, destroy their credibility. I really see where you're coming from, but I would like to respectfully suggest that you may be overthinking this. Any L.A. historian will be able to tell you that being into tickling is really the LEAST thing that will get noticed among the collection of perversions, dirty secrets and other drug-fueled, abusive and cheating-laden life a lot of Hollywood professionals live. And I am not even talking about the stars; producers, actors, even the goddamn props guy might be doing stuff that will make you feel like you're the only sane person in the room.

Besides, whether you're found out or not, it does not matter. If someone wants to take you down, they'll make something up anyway. I mean, have you read the gutter press, the kind of shit they write? If you throw tickling and furries in the lot, people may smirk, but they'll quickly skip to the abductions, mafia ties, murders and drug-use, regardless of their veracity. Just do what you do best and keep working hard, that would be my advice.

I hope this helps...

EDIT: I also do not think that success comes in a one-off, once-in-a-lifetime kind of opportunity. It is undeniable that some stars got lucky on first attempt (not to mention the offspring of stars who used their famous parents' connections in the milieu), but it took the others many attempts. It is like looking for a job, in a way: keep trying until you strike gold. In the course of your life, you'll miss opportunities for various reasons, but that should not deter you from keeping trying.

BTW, I had a look at your gallery and found out that you are quite talented :goodjob:

I love your art, and I can see how it can sustain your dreams.

Erotickles · Sep 29, 2017

We should talk about SHAME

Thank you so much, Sketcher, for sharing so frankly! :grouphug:

I cannot advise you to come out - since I, myself, did not have the courage yet to fully do so. It would be the kind of advice "Do as I say and not as I do". I know that I should come out, though, I know that I need to come out, and that all arguments of reason suggest the sky will not fall once I do. I mean, it's a tickling fetish. It is only, a tickling fetish....

Other commenters have made excellent points, so I will just try to add my two cents:

My first cent is - any of the talks given by Brene Brown, who studies shame and vulnerability. She is a great, engaging, speaker, that consistently brings a tear to my eye.
Though she does not talk about shame in the context of having a fetish - she takes shame on in a way which easily is projected onto specific aspects of shame - such as this. Shame is the fear of social disconnection - of being rejected, and not wanted, and denied company, belonging and acceptance - and regardless of what the thing is that causes it - the mechanism is the same. What does it say about coming out? I am still trying to find out for myself, though I am pretty sure that I SHOULD come out - I am just not sure how to do it.

[video]https://www.ted.com/talks/brene_brown_listening_to_shame#t-279375[/video]

The other cent is: don't beat yourself up.
You are not "selfish" for aspiring to fulfil yourself - professionally, personally, or sexually. The word "dickhead" is also pejorative - and what for, man? what for?!
Let me point out a quote of the above video, where Brene Brown explains the difference between guilt and shame:

Shame is a focus on self, guilt is a focus on behavior.
Shame is "I am bad." Guilt is "I did something bad."

[...]
Guilt: I'm sorry. I made a mistake.
Shame: I'm sorry. I am a mistake.

What you wrote sounds like shame, and we need to fight it like hell, my brother!
You are an honest, talented, motivated individual, who aspires to be a part of the world, personally, professionally, and spiritually - in a the way art is spiritual. It is amazing!

It is sooo understandable why derogatory responses we witnessed of experience to our fetish - make us ashamed and hide.
However, on the objective level - why should we internalize this shame and unworthiness so much?! For wanting to tickle or be tickled? For being different?

Comfort Eagle · Sep 29, 2017

Nobody's going to care. I ask old co-workers to shoot videos with me all the time. People greatly exaggerate the threat of being "outed" being into tickle fetish stuff, nobody cares.

TheMasterTouch · Sep 30, 2017

I was outed by my now ex-wife during my divorce, to the point where her sisters knew that I found some of their feet attractive. Talk about your feared fantasy! I was really angry and embarrassed when it happened, but in the end it was ... nothing. I still see many of my ex in-laws because we had a child together, and everything is still fine. I swear that one of them loves to tease me by standing around barefoot when I come to her house to pick up my kid.

If that wasn't enough, my current girlfriend told one of our mutual friends about our tickling activities. Again, I freaked out a little because we all worked together at the time. But again, it really wasn't a big deal. By this time, I'm sure the knowledge about my fetishes is out in the wilderness and I have no way of knowing who knows and who doesn't any more. Nobody really cares about what you're doing with another consenting adult.

Now if you're going out in public and engaging in criminal behavior to satisfy your fetish, that's a whole new ball game. But even then, it's not the FETISH that would be getting you into trouble. It's the fact that you don't respect boundaries and are doing illegal things to indulge your fetish.

Delay · Sep 30, 2017

There are already plenty of excellent answers on this thread, so I'm not sure I can add that much, but I just wanted to let you know I can relate. I'm not an artist (though occasionally I do think about trying to publish some of of my original writing), but I also don't want my fetish life and my professional life to overlap too much. So I tend to be very private online, don't post pictures of myself, etc.

There continue to be cases of blackmailing in the industry I'm in. So I do sometimes wonder what I would do if someone tried to blackmail *me* with some of my stuff they found online (tickling may be the least of my problems in that case though). This used to make me pretty nervous, but I've gradually come to care less. I still don't have an answer for what I would do, but I'd like to think that in the end, I'd welcome the opportunity to talk about female sexuality, femdom, fetishes, and the distinction between reality and sexual fantasy *outside* of the traditional fetish world if someone really ever did feel they had to confront me about what they found.

So I do think part of the answer to your question is that in the long run, the best way to deal with this is probably to become more accepting of your fetishes, to accept them as part of yourself, and to worry less about being outed, because, in the end, as several people have stated, it's probably much less of a deal than you think. But I do understand that's not easy.

scarredknuckles · Sep 30, 2017

get big and get found out on purpose and then OWN it completely. Make tickling the new gay. force acceptance and rub it in as many faces as possible

Comfort Eagle · Sep 30, 2017

scarredknuckles said:
Make tickling the new gay. force acceptance and rub it in as many faces as possible

Sketcher92 · Oct 1, 2017

The Tickle Room said:
I used to be worried about my career and wore a mask while producing I also realize this would creep out my models and kind of hurt my audience. Eventually I took the mask off and decided to just live life and do what I have to do you should never be judged on the decisions you make as a person and what you decide to do. So if I were you I would just do what you have to do and keep it to yourself in the people that you trust and if someone finds out about it and your professional career simply State this is what I do on my private time under a different Alias it doesn't connect to me and it shouldn't

I suppose that's fair. Glad that it works for you. I may just have to accept this.

Myriads said:
There have been a long list of artists that have done adult oriented material over the years and had no issues. A fair number of named comic book artists have their little secrets.

You use a pseudo when you draw porn, and that is more then enough of a cover for anyone who thinks they recognize you. You can deny.

Don't worry over it much. You need the income, and its there. And in the realm of what people have done in Hollywood to tread water til they make it, drawing Furry-tickling porn (Applejack! no!) is small potatoes.

Just don't get too cute with your duel identity. You can't come out to play in public and take credit. You are either anon, or out.

Myriads

This is very true. Steve Ditko drew porn comics, among others. But though it works for some, that doesn't mean it will always work for others.

Ok, the Applejack comment genuinely made me laugh. XD Thanks for that.

So, if I understand, your advice would be to keep this part of my life entirely online? No attempts at meetups or hooking up through FetLife? I'm inclined to agree, though not particularly enthusiastic about that.

Sketcher92 · Oct 1, 2017

Tenebrae said:
I really understand your concern. In the course of my studies I met some people who wanted to pursue political careers, and were afraid that their fantasies would somehow turn them into laughing stocks, destroy their credibility. I really see where you're coming from, but I would like to respectfully suggest that you may be overthinking this. Any L.A. historian will be able to tell you that being into tickling is really the LEAST thing that will get noticed among the collection of perversions, dirty secrets and other drug-fueled, abusive and cheating-laden life a lot of Hollywood professionals live. And I am not even talking about the stars; producers, actors, even the goddamn props guy might be doing stuff that will make you feel like you're the only sane person in the room.

Besides, whether you're found out or not, it does not matter. If someone wants to take you down, they'll make something up anyway. I mean, have you read the gutter press, the kind of shit they write? If you throw tickling and furries in the lot, people may smirk, but they'll quickly skip to the abductions, mafia ties, murders and drug-use, regardless of their veracity. Just do what you do best and keep working hard, that would be my advice.

I hope this helps...

EDIT: I also do not think that success comes in a one-off, once-in-a-lifetime kind of opportunity. It is undeniable that some stars got lucky on first attempt (not to mention the offspring of stars who used their famous parents' connections in the milieu), but it took the others many attempts. It is like looking for a job, in a way: keep trying until you strike gold. In the course of your life, you'll miss opportunities for various reasons, but that should not deter you from keeping trying.

BTW, I had a look at your gallery and found out that you are quite talented I love your art, and I can see how it can sustain your dreams.

You're very right about that, especially in Los Angeles, but it's not so much the supposed immorality of this kind of thing that bothers me. It's what you said about your friends - they were afraid of being "laughing stocks." You can be a terrible person and still have a successful career. People do it all the time (just look at Woody Allen. Or Rebecca Sugar). But if people make fun of you...THAT'S where your career ends. A person can survive scandal, but not mockery.
If I were just into S&M shit, I wouldn't think twice. My concern is that if people discover the fact that I have a tickling fetish and have created work around it, that they'll make fun of me. I mean, let's be honest...it's kind of a silly fetish that's easy to make fun of. Hell, there are times when I'VE thought it was silly and childish. And in our society, as ridiculous as it sounds, that can potentially be more destructive to your image than a history of crime. I don't know if it WILL be in this case...I could be very wrong...but I think it's a justified fear.

It did help, thank you. And I'm painfully aware that it will take me a lot of failed attempts if I'm going to succeed at anything. Haha XD

Thank you so much.

Erotickles said:
Thank you so much, Sketcher, for sharing so frankly!

I cannot advise you to come out - since I, myself, did not have the courage yet to fully do so. It would be the kind of advice "Do as I say and not as I do". I know that I should come out, though, I know that I need to come out, and that all arguments of reason suggest the sky will not fall once I do. I mean, it's a tickling fetish. It is only, a tickling fetish....

Other commenters have made excellent points, so I will just try to add my two cents:

My first cent is - any of the talks given by Brene Brown, who studies shame and vulnerability. She is a great, engaging, speaker, that consistently brings a tear to my eye.
Though she does not talk about shame in the context of having a fetish - she takes shame on in a way which easily is projected onto specific aspects of shame - such as this. Shame is the fear of social disconnection - of being rejected, and not wanted, and denied company, belonging and acceptance - and regardless of what the thing is that causes it - the mechanism is the same. What does it say about coming out? I am still trying to find out for myself, though I am pretty sure that I SHOULD come out - I am just not sure how to do it.

[video]https://www.ted.com/talks/brene_brown_listening_to_shame#t-279375[/video]

The other cent is: don't beat yourself up.
You are not "selfish" for aspiring to fulfil yourself - professionally, personally, or sexually. The word "dickhead" is also pejorative - and what for, man? what for?!
Let me point out a quote of the above video, where Brene Brown explains the difference between guilt and shame:

What you wrote sounds like shame, and we need to fight it like hell, my brother!
You are an honest, talented, motivated individual, who aspires to be a part of the world, personally, professionally, and spiritually - in a the way art is spiritual. It is amazing!

It is sooo understandable why derogatory responses we witnessed of experience to our fetish - make us ashamed and hide.
However, on the objective level - why should we internalize this shame and unworthiness so much?! For wanting to tickle or be tickled? For being different?

I see what you're saying about shame. And I don't think this is, really, much to be ashamed of. But I can't help that I am. This is just a fetish that seems so primed for mocking and scorn. Thank you for sharing that.

meangry · Oct 1, 2017

You can mock peoplefor practically anything though.

Sketcher92 · Oct 1, 2017

Comfort Eagle said:
Nobody's going to care. I ask old co-workers to shoot videos with me all the time. People greatly exaggerate the threat of being "outed" being into tickle fetish stuff, nobody cares.

Well, I think you might be right and that I might be overthinking this, but with respect - this is part of your livelihood. That's something you want, and it isn't something that I want. Our situation is different.
As I said above, I'm not afraid of people morally judging me. I'm afraid of being laughed at, which is much worse.

TheMasterTouch said:
I was outed by my now ex-wife during my divorce, to the point where her sisters knew that I found some of their feet attractive. Talk about your feared fantasy! I was really angry and embarrassed when it happened, but in the end it was ... nothing. I still see many of my ex in-laws because we had a child together, and everything is still fine. I swear that one of them loves to tease me by standing around barefoot when I come to her house to pick up my kid.

If that wasn't enough, my current girlfriend told one of our mutual friends about our tickling activities. Again, I freaked out a little because we all worked together at the time. But again, it really wasn't a big deal. By this time, I'm sure the knowledge about my fetishes is out in the wilderness and I have no way of knowing who knows and who doesn't any more. Nobody really cares about what you're doing with another consenting adult.

Now if you're going out in public and engaging in criminal behavior to satisfy your fetish, that's a whole new ball game. But even then, it's not the FETISH that would be getting you into trouble. It's the fact that you don't respect boundaries and are doing illegal things to indulge your fetish.

Holy shit, I'm sorry that happened. I'm glad it worked itself out though. I suppose deep down most people don't care, but it's just always concerned me because I've never really been able to talk to anybody about it.
Oh no no, I'd never do anything ethically questionable with this. XD

Delay said:
There are already plenty of excellent answers on this thread, so I'm not sure I can add that much, but I just wanted to let you know I can relate. I'm not an artist (though occasionally I do think about trying to publish some of of my original writing), but I also don't want my fetish life and my professional life to overlap too much. So I tend to be very private online, don't post pictures of myself, etc.

There continue to be cases of blackmailing in the industry I'm in. So I do sometimes wonder what I would do if someone tried to blackmail *me* with some of my stuff they found online (tickling may be the least of my problems in that case though). This used to make me pretty nervous, but I've gradually come to care less. I still don't have an answer for what I would do, but I'd like to think that in the end, I'd welcome the opportunity to talk about female sexuality, femdom, fetishes, and the distinction between reality and sexual fantasy *outside* of the traditional fetish world if someone really ever did feel they had to confront me about what they found.

So I do think part of the answer to your question is that in the long run, the best way to deal with this is probably to become more accepting of your fetishes, to accept them as part of yourself, and to worry less about being outed, because, in the end, as several people have stated, it's probably much less of a deal than you think. But I do understand that's not easy.

You're probably right. This is something I've always had difficulty accepting about myself...not because I believe it's wrong, but just because I believe it's...well, silly. I hope nothing happens, but if it does, you seem to have a really healthy attitude about how to handle it.
Thanks for sharing.

scarredknuckles said:
get big and get found out on purpose and then OWN it completely. Make tickling the new gay. force acceptance and rub it in as many faces as possible

I'm sorry, but that is horrible advice. I can't tell if you're joking or not.

ManInDistress · Oct 4, 2017

So if you become successful doing your own projects, someone could find out you used to draw fetish material to pay the bills? That doesn't sound different from most artist, they may not of done fetish but they start doing whatever a client requests in order to make a living while they dream up or construct their own personal projects. What kind of ostentatious snob would look down on you for that?

magic fingers · Oct 5, 2017

Sketcher92 said:
Hi. Anyone who reads this, hope you're well. Also, sincere apologies for going on a tangent.

I'm an artist, hoping to "make it" and begin a career out in Los Angeles (so, in other words, I'm a total dumbass). Of course, I'm not having much luck - God knows how difficult it is to break into the entertainment industries. So for the past few months, in order to supplement my income, I thought I would try coming on this website for the first time and offering my services as a fetish artist. Besides, I'd had a tickle fetish for as long as I could remember, and was aching for a way to express it with other people, not just be trapped alone with it.

Thankfully, it's gone very well. But possibly too well.

Tons of generous people have paid me to draw tickling stuff for them, especially once I was dragged into the FurAffinity community (that last part either makes complete sense or is deeply unfortunate, depending on who you ask. I'm not a furry, but I've somehow gotten pretty popular over there, and relatively quickly. Hey, go where you get opportunities, right?) Now, I love drawing tickling, I'm very thankful for the business, and I've made some genuine online friends and met great people in the past few months because of all this. But make no mistake: I initially started doing this because I was desperate for money. And it's worked. It's helped me survive out here. However, this also concerns me.

See, as you might reasonably guess, this place is my double life. I keep my fetish as locked-away from my everyday living as possible. No one can know about this. Many of you can understand. And the more popular my tickling art gets, the closer I come to my two lives colliding. Sooner or later, a fan of my tickling work is bound to come across my portfolio, or the webcomic that I'm attempting to get off the ground, or anything else like that, and realize who I am. And that terrifies me. My career could be ruined before it starts. The shame and embarrassment of being "outed" would be unbearable.

And here's the other thing - I know that this is stupid and selfish, but I don't want to be some nobody artist working on storyboards for other people for the rest of his life. I want to be somebody. I want to be another Tim Burton or Frank Miller and create something that leaves a mark on the world. And I typically don't think very highly of myself, but some delusional part of me really believes that I could be a successful and well-known artist if given the chance to prove it. I'm ambitious, not an egomaniac.
On the slim off-chance that this ever happens, it's extremely likely that a client will recognize my work. And the longer this goes on, the more likely that becomes.

On the one hand, I'm desperate and need to support myself financially in any way possible. But on the other, this just becomes more and more of a risk every single day. I feel trapped, nervous, and unsure of what to do. I guess what I'm trying to ask is...have I already gone too far? Was this a mistake? Should I be ashamed of this? Should I stop?
You can nuke your webpages out of existence as hard as you want, but nothing on the internet disappears forever.

Although, Rebecca Sugar drew blatant child pornography, and she still miraculously has a job/created Stephen Universe, so perhaps I have nothing to worry about.

(As a side note, this fear is also why I haven't uploaded any pictures of myself or other info to this website. Which is really hindering my ability to meet up with other people who share my fetish. I'd love the opportunity to openly share this important part of my life with someone, but I'm terrified of what will happen if I post my face here. And that's kind of an important step when proving to other people that you're not a creep. Attempts to use FetLife have been unsuccessful. Not that any of this is relevant.)

What do you guys think I should do?
...Sorry. I'm such a selfish dickhead.

I think it's a little easier to maintain anonymity if you want to be a special efx artist, or even a director, as opposed to an actor or entertainer. I mean hell I know absolutely nothing about Tim Burton's personal life, or even what he looks like. And I never even heard of Frank Miller. Being a fetish artist shouldn't bother too many people as long as children aren't involved

Tenebrae · Oct 6, 2017

Sketcher92 said:
You're very right about that, especially in Los Angeles, but it's not so much the supposed immorality of this kind of thing that bothers me. It's what you said about your friends - they were afraid of being "laughing stocks." You can be a terrible person and still have a successful career. People do it all the time (just look at Woody Allen. Or Rebecca Sugar). But if people make fun of you...THAT'S where your career ends. A person can survive scandal, but not mockery.
If I were just into S&M shit, I wouldn't think twice. My concern is that if people discover the fact that I have a tickling fetish and have created work around it, that they'll make fun of me. I mean, let's be honest...it's kind of a silly fetish that's easy to make fun of. Hell, there are times when I'VE thought it was silly and childish. And in our society, as ridiculous as it sounds, that can potentially be more destructive to your image than a history of crime. I don't know if it WILL be in this case...I could be very wrong...but I think it's a justified fear.

It did help, thank you. And I'm painfully aware that it will take me a lot of failed attempts if I'm going to succeed at anything. Haha XD

Thank you so much.

You're welcome! I always try my best to support the good artists in our community, and there are plenty of them :xpulcy:

I am glad I apparently nailed the core of the problem. I really see what you mean about people making fun of you and stuff. It may happen, but I do not think it will ever reach a point where you'll be unable to work or anything. I do not think there is such a thing as a "socially acceptable kink"; anyway if some ill-intentioned people wanna make fun of you, they will just make something up, regardless if you have a kink or not.

Look what happened to Tarantino. Starting from his second film, Pulp Fiction, his foot fetish was already showing. In Jackie Brown, it was even more obvious; the close ups on Bridget Fonda's perfect peds in the trailer were actually the reason I watched the film in the first place. A French journalist even asked him in Cannes: "Are you a foot fetishist?". He gave this awesomely cute reply: "I wouldn't go as far as calling it a fetish..." I guess he was feeling the same as you: fearing people were gonna make fun of him, etc... Yet nothing happened. Literally nothing. And he kept pushing his own limits until Death Proof, which could qualify as a fetish movie of its own (it even has a brief tickling scene), and still no one is around making fun of him. Conversely, handsome actor Jon Hamm has been ridiculed by some idiots because... he allegedly has a big dick, which you'll agree is no laughing matter among people who have more than two brain cells. Neither of them saw their career suffering because of it.

I guess what I am trying to say is: don't worry so much. You can own it. The stuff you're into, it's you private garden: people can peek into it, and idiots are gonna laugh about it, but to the vast majority of people out there it is just gonna be a "meh" reaction. And to us here on the TMF, you'll always be "one of us". :grouphug:

Once again, I hear what you say. It hurts if people use that against you. Haters gonna hate, but you're not alone facing it, and more importantly you gotta be stronger than them. At least that's my take on it.

Wish you a long and successful life!

magic fingers said:
And I never even heard of Frank Miller.

This is literally the face I made when I read this sentence: :yowzer:

Oddjob0226 · Oct 6, 2017

I haven’t outed myself, nor been discovered, but I wrote tickle-porn as a way to make $ in college, pre-Internet. Now I have local and national writing awards. Although I have no desire to be found out, in the cyber-age likelihood that I do get found out, im just going to be all. “This what I like and a part of who I am.”

I’m also older than you and nearly died twice in my life. People not liking you for a certain thing becomes far less scary after you reach a certain threshold of existence.

3xPIN · Oct 13, 2017

Eh don’t worry about the vanillas and their fetish phobias. Unless you get hired by some uptight church, I think you are in the clear.

As a client, I can tell you have talent. You will make it. Just give it time and do whatcha gotta do to get by.

Laughthirsty Lr · Nov 2, 2017

Don't sweat it, man! You're being to hard on yourself! You aren't the first of us to feel this way and you aren't the first of us to consider having your art work pulled from a forum or website. I even did it recently after thinking about other tickling fetish artists who had the same thing done or went through some type of change and just quit altogether. My own art skills have deteriorated since I stopped drawing and now I'm thinking about studying and starting again. On top of that I have a tremor that makes it sometimes difficult to hold my hand still when I turn my wrist certain ways. You clearly have a gift for drawing and if it lines your pockets with money until you can find some other kind of job that you're more interested in and do this kind of art on the side then, why not? Don't be worried about putting your picture online. I was the same way for years. It's just fear of rejection and paranoia. Nothing more. Just anxiety. Calm down. It's all good. Just relax and live your life to the fullest. Stop trying to be perfect. None of us are nor were we meant to be. I may not do so hot myself after I get my skills back up to par but, I'm going to try. That's really all you CAN do. Just let it go. It'll be okay. You'll see.

Druidici · Nov 2, 2017

I agree with Myriads..as long as you have a pen name as a cover I wouldn't sweat the small stuff. Keep on keepin on.

brotherted · Nov 3, 2017

I have this frame shift that's helped me a lot: If anyone asks, I say "Well sure, tickling can be fun, but I'm into lots of experimental, creative, non-standard things."

On the one hand, it may seem like a fear-based dodge -- after all, I am more turned on by tickling than anything else. On the other hand, it is actually true -- I do enjoy other sexual and non-sexual creative activities. And by framing it as "that's just one of the many creative things I explore -- aren't you creative too?" it flips the script a bit, and almost implies that the other person is boring for not including tickling as a form of foreplay. Instead of "weird, dark, creepy fetish" I re-brand it as "I'm open-minded, aren't you?"

That said, it's only revealed on a strictly need-to-know basis.

Kind of Scared That Tickling Will Ruin My Career

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