LADIES - what will make an app for this community useful, safe, and desired by you?

Hi all,

I am a software developer, and I am looking into taking on a project for us – the tickling community.

However – in order for such an app / platform to have any merit - it should first and foremost be useful,
inviting, and safe for the ladies in the bunch. I am therefore asking for your thoughts and input, as to what
should the attributes of such an app be, and how we can make using such an app feel (and be) as safe,
worthwhile, and rewarding as possible. (I have a few ideas – but I am in no way “locked on” any of them,
and new ideas will also be welcome).

Objective
There are quite a few objectives people have for being active members of this community.
Discussions with like minded people – for example – seem to be well served by the forums themselves.
However, a complementing application may serve us further, in another form of fulfillment of our tickling
fascination / kink / fetish: finding a meaningful connection with another person – who is also mutually
compatible when it comes to tickling.

Ideas raised so far (they are preliminary and limited – your own ideas are welcome!):

1. Helping ticklephiles recognize each other in everyday life. This idea was raised in the past –
   but not in a technological context to the best of my knowledge. One concept I thought of is an app that
   accesses the events you marked as “interested” or “going” on Facebook, and shows a list of other users
   of the app planning to go to that event. What information shows on the list? That should be discussed,
   and be only that which you are comfortable with. All in all, it seems like an opportunity to interact, and arrange
   to meet during the event next to the coffee machine, in a public setting.
   
2. An app to arrange local meet ups / munches. I am told that in some locations, there were
   times of great successes of local communities gathering for munches. Will that be the preferable concept for you
   to meet others? Such an app may be composed of a map with pins representing each user, possibly with some
   info about them (gender, preference, etc), and the option to organize a local event which all users in the area
   are notified about, can RSVP, etc.
   
3. A “dating” app. Though this may be the trivial concept to choose, it is also the one with proven failures.
   In 1999, when I was still a hobbyist, I launched a basic dating site for the tickling community named “Ticklematch”.
   Several years later, in 2003, there was another dating site launched by a member of the community
   (not me, I was not involved with the development of that site and only learned of it retroactively).
   Both survived a few months, among other reasons – because of a terrible male to female ratio.
   This option is still worth discussion, as maybe there are ways to make it more friendly.
   However, I suspect we really need to come up with something radically different in order for the fate of such
   a dating site to be different than its predecessors.

Questions: (Feel free to answer only some of them)

1. Each idea in the "ideas" section above corresponds to a different scenario of meeting with other community members:
   a. Meeting up in an event you both go to while having an indication that the other person is also into tickling,
   b. Going to local munches and meeting in a group, or
   c. Meeting online in a designated dating app
   
   which would you choose? Is there another scenario you prefer? Can you share why? Can you share your objections?
   
2. What level of “exposure” would you be comfortable with using such an app?
   It is possible, for example, to allow female users to be invisible - and let them (you) make some action towards someone they see
   and like - in which case they become visible to that individual specifically.
   Would you require such “invisibility” option? Will you be willing to be the one to initiate contact if such invisibility is implemented?
   Would you expect user photos to be available? If so – would you be willing to have your photo visible, and if so, to who and
   under what conditions?
   
3. Anonymity and privacy.
   Signing in to an app using Facebook has its advantages:
   It's simple, and at least for the first concept listed – required. It also allows better credibility of users, because one cannot
   just register with a different email address and pretend to be a different person. Having that said, would be willing to sign
   in using Facebook? None of the apps is intended to post to your timeline or even ask for the required permissions to do so
   (and if posting permission is not given specifically, it cannot do it anyway) – but still, will there be any hesitation to use the
   app if signing in is done using Facebook?
   
4. What other functionalities can make an app of any of the types listed safer and make you more likely to use it?
   
5. Do you have any other remarks, requirements, or suggestions?

YOUR INPUT IS WELCOME!!
and if you rather give this input privately – you are invited to use the messaging system or use my email address:
erotickle(At)posteo.net
(Substitute (At) with @ -- also note, that in the email address it is erotickle in single form, not erotickles in plural)

Also, if you find this topic of value, please share this thread actively with potential respondents. It is important to get as many
view points on this issues before making any decisions...

Thank you!
Erotickles

Doesnt the site already have those features?

Thank you for considering doing this!

I think that simplying the app will be what will make it stand out and keep people coming back. From what I have seen here over the years... shyness/shadyness/fear/ ageism(judgement on looks and everything and anything people will find to make excuses...) /catfishing/ fear of being outed... etc etc. All this still prevails as to why people refuse to meet up with each other. Already we have sites and options to post our pictures and self information. (Like here and Fetlife.) But its all played out and quite frankly has been done in overkill. Tons of sites- tons of apps. Its too much. Too confusing. Too many options for people. Like a candy store people eat it all. Or none. Or only some eating little.

Really the results vary from person to person. But every person has similiar threads of stories. Like: 1- I have no issues meeting women. 2- I have zero luck meeting women. 3- I can't meet anyone close by: everyone is too far away. 4- I can't afford it. 5- I want to remain anonymous. 6- I don't want to meet men just other women. 7- Dating has changed- I don't use apps. I just go to bars or events. Etc etc etc.

In a way I think we kind of have to take things back old school. To take away the instant gratification...and put back in the mystery...

The map idea I have had and I think it's the most important key to this. Like a good and easy weather map... I imagine opening it and seeing the map with the newest pins. Kinda like radar on the go. For models this would be great I assume. A one stop shop to see whats new for everyone on a daily basis, any time of day or night. And not have to (if they don't want to but probably will) and not have to update the 10 diff sites they are on to update people. Again, a one stop shop for whats happening out there with a really good map.

For people who intend to say host events, or for tickle models to post where they will be... they get different and special emoticons to help people differentiate the diff events and such. But... when an event is new... that event will be put on the map highlighted in RED. (Blinking to get you to look at it.) And after a while... or when the date is reached... the color fades to another color... and then is gone off the map. Different countries play into this as well.

When you click on the event/munch/ whatever... you will be taken to the info about that event. The cost- the address- the rules- and what will be happening. I suggest a video option so that hosts/ models can talk about what to expect but.... even that is not necessary. Simplification can not be understated.

Most people skip most of the steps anyway in posting about themselves. (Look at any given profile here.) (Even models don't discuss prices publicly usually. But models move... and may have specials and such. Producers when new videos are available. etc.

Following directions is almost treated like a "nah". For whatever reasons people have... (staying anonymous/ shy/ not feeling attractive/trolling whatever) it is too easy to do now just to skip most options. So... if most people want to skip... let them! Most people have their fav sites like Instagram/ Fetlife and such to showcase themselves. We need an interactive "Whats happening TODAY, and THIS WEEK/THIS MONTH type of app. it's like the world/internet has 10 billion newspapers to read. So most go unread because of the saturation.

People can click an "attending"... but their info won't be applicable- it won't even be available. It's just for going to be for what the hosts can expect in way of attendance. If you charge for this- maybe keep it small for the first year so everyone can get get a chance to use it. And if need be... up the charge a dollar or two the next year. Just to help you keep this active. Course free will always draw people in to try it.

To drive my point home of the saturation of dating sites and apps. Some work some don't. But no matter which site or app we are talking about.. most people skip most of the features. Its been said time and time again people skip reading profiles and message willy nilly in hopes of just casting the net and see what sticks. I think this should be done away with entirely. You have to bring back the excitement of meeting people... and of the events itself... and just simplify it... (don't let hosts and such make super huge pages like what Myspace became before its demise. ) Simple. People can google most places, and be given links for direct access for more info on the people and places. Meetup should be simplified. But... none of my business- I don't use it nor like it. Nothing of interest to me is ever done around where I live anyway.

Ok... I will stop here I am truly hungover today lol. I hope this helps. Good luck! And I will totally download this app to see what you do with it. Good luck!

If the people are too lazy then they are too lazy to use an app.

Thank you for taking the time and putting your thoughts on screen, especially being hungover.
This is truly appreciated!

Your thoughts of the "map" concept are interesting. The idea of role based pin colors is great,
though I am wondering about what you wrote about its use for models and - basically - setting up sessions.
Not for having anything bad towards models, of course, but I wonder if this is the kind of use
for an app that may make it feel "sleazy" in the eyes of other female members...
So what do other people think about this?

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We need an interactive "Whats happening TODAY, and THIS WEEK/THIS MONTH type of app.

Click to expand...

I think you put it perfectly. I did not quite understand what you wrote about "following directions".

I tend to believe that an app aimed to bridge a gap between the online and the real -
there should be some incentives or requirements not to have an empty profile.
It doesn't have to be long and exhausting - but it seems only reasonable that in an app aimed to facilitate
interaction - people would tell SOMETHING about themselves. Am I wrong?
So How do we strike the balance? What info should be required for such an app?

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

One note about dating apps - and the online in general:

ts been said time and time again people skip reading profiles and message willy nilly in hopes of just casting the net and see what sticks.

Click to expand...

I agree it is the situation, and I think it is a problem, because indeed, it often impedes any
meaningful interactions from happening. How would you think this could be mitigated, though?

I am currently actually working on a demonstration of the "Facebook events" idea, and hope to upload it
and offer to you all to download and feedback about it in a few hours.

Thanks again,
And I'd love to hear more - from you and others!

I'm a guy but having met countless women via dating sites/apps over the years, I can say that the invisible idea would be awesome. So many of the ones I've met have complaints about overflowing inboxes and asshole guys. Like you said, there are fewer women anyways so let them do the picking.

Another good idea could be to let the women rate their interactions with guys. Say a woman messages a guy and things start off pretty good but fizzle for whatever reason and she decides to move on. After telling him, he acts like an immature asshole and insults her and yells and screams. She could rate him poorly for that alerting other women that he's an asshole. It would also keep guys on their best behavior since they know they are being rated. Just an idea.

Erotickles said:

Thank you for taking the time and putting your thoughts on screen, especially being hungover.
This is truly appreciated!

Your thoughts of the "map" concept are interesting. The idea of role based pin colors is great,
though I am wondering about what you wrote about its use for models and - basically - setting up sessions.
Not for having anything bad towards models, of course, but I wonder if this is the kind of use
for an app that may make it feel "sleazy" in the eyes of other female members...
So what do other people think about this?

Click to expand...

Hmmm... maybe as you're signing up... allow certain features to be checked/unchecked- an opt out of option. Like people are able to check mark what they are interested in only. The rest won't show up on the map. Kinda like what they use on dating sites: "I am interested in:" Except the list available here would go beyond genders/singles/married. And only show the groups they want to see.
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I think you put it perfectly. I did not quite understand what you wrote about "following directions".

Click to expand...

I just meant that for... like here: not everyone fills out their profiles. Not to say they HAVE to... but... they should lol. And dating sites have options people don't fill out. It should be a requirement that they do. Especially birth date.

I tend to believe that an app aimed to bridge a gap between the online and the real -
there should be some incentives or requirements not to have an empty profile.
It doesn't have to be long and exhausting - but it seems only reasonable that in an app aimed to facilitate
interaction - people would tell SOMETHING about themselves. Am I wrong?
So How do we strike the balance? What info should be required for such an app?

Click to expand...

Well, just have the fields be a requirement. No one can get in until they are filled in.

Sex
Age
Ler/lee/both
Straight/Bi/Gay/Lesbian/Gender Fluid
Married/Single/Divorced
Dominant/Submissive
100 words about themselves or more. The more people are required to write about themselves the better a woman or men can see the personality and or thought process.
Not sure what else at this moment.


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One note about dating apps - and the online in general:


I agree it is the situation, and I think it is a problem, because indeed, it often impedes any
meaningful interactions from happening. How would you think this could be mitigated, though?

Sometimes i think that a good way would be (besides munches)- is to have other kinds of nights held around the country to help people feel more comfortable. Anything from a wine tasting to beach outtings- concerts to bowling night lol. Everyone has something they enjoy that gets people interested in going out. But all I see is play parties, dungeons, and munches. (Which is great but... its not covering the spectrum for comfort activities. Activites where part of the evening is the activity itself. Opening up the door for friendly communication first. Friends first. I think planning support groups would also be something that would be nice for people and can go where its more to talk out the problems that come with this fetish. Even to get in touch with say online counselors. Support groups I feel would be a great feature to have.

Maybe even a 30 second video introduction feature would help. Like "Hi, my name is doll and I like... etc etc" Very old school 80's but maybe that would help the women get a feel for the person they are looking at FIRST. "no porn allowed- just an introduction video...)

I am currently actually working on a demonstration of the "Facebook events" idea, and hope to upload it
and offer to you all to download and feedback about it in a few hours.

Thanks again,
And I'd love to hear more - from you and others!

Click to expand...

Happy to help!

Click to expand...

FootballGuy said:

I'm a guy but having met countless women via dating sites/apps over the years, I can say that the invisible idea would be awesome. So many of the ones I've met have complaints about overflowing inboxes and asshole guys. Like you said, there are fewer women anyways so let them do the picking.

Another good idea could be to let the women rate their interactions with guys. Say a woman messages a guy and things start off pretty good but fizzle for whatever reason and she decides to move on. After telling him, he acts like an immature asshole and insults her and yells and screams. She could rate him poorly for that alerting other women that he's an asshole. It would also keep guys on their best behavior since they know they are being rated. Just an idea.

Click to expand...

I like the idea but see so many problems. People can lie... Idk about that one... But... instead of ratings there could be a review section- where the person in question can respond to what is being said. And the responses can't be deleted. (Well Admin could delete them.) Just so the viewer gets both sides of the story. To keep it fair.

Useful, safe, and desired? Honestly...females only. The unfortunate irony of such an app is that, without proper capabilities, guys would be on it like stink on a monkey.

As far as the profile bit and age - kinda useless to have someone enter how old they are. I'm, say, 30 when I enter the info; the site continues for 20 years, but my profile still says I'm 30 (assuming I don't correct it). Sure, the proposed site may state when the member joined, but how many are going to stop and do that math? For that data bit, better to have one enter their birth year (not the full birthdate, for obvious reasons). Viewers still have to do the math, but they won't be deceived by a dubious age, unless they are...well, let's not go there.

Ohh Kay. Lol. I think, initially, there won't be much of a way to confirm that everyone is who they say they are.

But I would say that maybe use of the app as a "hook up tool" for tickling could help us women feel safe, and guys feel that the truth about gender and such will be known prior to anything getting too serious.

I would suggest an app that the person using has to sign or check mark a rules for use list, with being barred or suspended from searching profiles or contacting members as a result of violation of rules. It would include obvious things like no harassment, threats, trolling, catfishing and so on.

I think also, and I know this would be really tricky... But that it should require that if 2 members want to meet for sessions, then they should have to send one another some type of proof they are who they claim to be prior to meeting. (this would be enforced by catfishes who cannot produce this being barred). I don't mean any sensitive information, but screenshots of their Facebook profile, the requirement that they send said proofs to a trusted 3rd party overseeing the app, or that they Skype chat, etc prior to any plan to meet. If they didn't want to disclose info like last names, their friends names, these could be edited out prior to sending. If there was still a question of the validity of proof, they would have to request a 3rd party for the app investigate the proof and confirm if it is legit.

And if you are driving or flying to meet. .. even if you are lucky enough to meet someone a few blocks away... I don't know if this could be required but I think it should at least be highly encouraged, that members share with trusted 3rd party the exact physical location the meeting will take place, and possibly identifying info such as driver's license numbers. Just in case anything criminal should happen and the police are involved or the person is in danger. I also think it should be highly encouraged that both, but in particular the one traveling, to look up and save to their phones the numbers of local authorities of wherever they are traveling.

I also think the suspension or banning penalty should be enforced for anyone trying to arrange meetings outside of the apps rules and without sending proofs to the other person or disclosing identifying info to 3rd party for safety reasons prior to a real meeting. The only exception would be if the members already knew and had trusted each other from being in contact before talking on the app, and in that case they should both have to confirm to the 3rd parties overseeing the rules that this is the case and they are already known to each other.

I know all this may be unrealistic. But eBay has a feature where u cannot write and send yours or anyone's email address thru the eBay messaging system; if u try the message will automatically censor it. Maybe something like that could be required for sending street addresses and phone numbers to other members until the rules for exchanging proofs to each other & 3rd party have been met?

Ohh Kay. Lol. I think, initially, there won't be much of a way to confirm that everyone is who they say they are.

But I would say that maybe use of the app as a "hook up tool" for tickling could help us women feel safe, and guys feel that the truth about gender and such will be known prior to anything getting too serious.

I would suggest an app that the person using has to sign or check mark a rules for use list, with being barred or suspended from searching profiles or contacting members as a result of violation of rules. It would include obvious things like no harassment, threats, trolling, catfishing and so on.

I think also, and I know this would be really tricky... But that it should require that if 2 members want to meet for sessions, then they should have to send one another some type of proof they are who they claim to be prior to meeting. (this would be enforced by catfishes who cannot produce this being barred). I don't mean any sensitive information, but screenshots of their Facebook profile, the requirement that they send said proofs to a trusted 3rd party overseeing the app, or that they Skype chat, etc prior to any plan to meet. If they didn't want to disclose info like last names, their friends names, these could be edited out prior to sending. If there was still a question of the validity of proof, they would have to request a 3rd party for the app investigate the proof and confirm if it is legit.

And if you are driving or flying to meet. .. even if you are lucky enough to meet someone a few blocks away... I don't know if this could be required but I think it should at least be highly encouraged, that members share with trusted 3rd party the exact physical location the meeting will take place, and possibly identifying info such as driver's license numbers. Just in case anything criminal should happen and the police are involved or the person is in danger. I also think it should be highly encouraged that both, but in particular the one traveling, to look up and save to their phones the numbers of local authorities of wherever they are traveling.

I also think the suspension or banning penalty should be enforced for anyone trying to arrange meetings outside of the apps rules and without sending proofs to the other person or disclosing identifying info to 3rd party for safety reasons prior to a real meeting. The only exception would be if the members already knew and had trusted each other from being in contact before talking on the app, and in that case they should both have to confirm to the 3rd parties overseeing the rules that this is the case and they are already known to each other.

I know all this may be unrealistic. But eBay has a feature where u cannot write and send yours or anyone's email address thru the eBay messaging system; if u try the message will automatically censor it. Maybe something like that could be required for sending street addresses and phone numbers to other members until the rules for exchanging proofs to each other & 3rd party have been met?

GirlMeetsTickle said:

Useful, safe, and desired? Honestly...females only. The unfortunate irony of such an app is that, without proper capabilities, guys would be on it like stink on a monkey.

Click to expand...

Fair enough, so what are these "proper capabilities" you think it should include?

rdhd said:

As far as the profile bit and age - kinda useless to have someone enter how old they are. I'm, say, 30 when I enter the info; the site continues for 20 years, but my profile still says I'm 30 (assuming I don't correct it). Sure, the proposed site may state when the member joined, but how many are going to stop and do that math? For that data bit, better to have one enter their birth year (not the full birthdate, for obvious reasons). Viewers still have to do the math, but they won't be deceived by a dubious age, unless they are...well, let's not go there.

Click to expand...

You are right, of course. Age will be calculated. For an app the uses Facebook - and this specific one requires that It is possible, as an app developer, to ask the user for permission to use the birth date they gave Facebook.

This way, it is also more likely to be true.

siamese dream said:

Ohh Kay. Lol. I think, initially, there won't be much of a way to confirm that everyone is who they say they are.

Click to expand...

Well, if people are willing to log in by Facebook - it gives some more credibility for this. Question is how many people, given the app is not going to post anything for you, are willing to do so.

siamese dream said:

But I would say that maybe use of the app as a "hook up tool" for tickling could help us women feel safe, and guys feel that the truth about gender and such will be known prior to anything getting too serious.

Click to expand...

I am a bit surprised with a request for a "hookup tool" on the ladies side. Is this what others rather too..? I actually was under the impression that it is other types of connections that are missing in the community - and that the TMF and Fetlife are tools serving for that already. Am I wrong?

siamese dream said:

I would suggest an app that the person using has to sign or check mark a rules for use list, with being barred or suspended from searching profiles or contacting members as a result of violation of rules. It would include obvious things like no harassment, threats, trolling, catfishing and so on.

Click to expand...

siamese dream said:

I also think the suspension or banning penalty should be enforced for anyone trying to arrange meetings outside of the apps rules and without sending proofs to the other person or disclosing identifying info to 3rd party for safety reasons prior to a real meeting. The only exception would be if the members already knew and had trusted each other from being in contact before talking on the app, and in that case they should both have to confirm to the 3rd parties overseeing the rules that this is the case and they are already known to each other.

Click to expand...

Ok, let's just put it under a general point of "law enforcement". I think this can be under the terms of service, and like all platforms - people can be blocked. There should be some mechanism of blocking - be it moderated, or based on a voting / rating system - as suggested elsewhere.

siamese dream said:

I think also, and I know this would be really tricky... But that it should require that if 2 members want to meet for sessions, then they should have to send one another some type of proof they are who they claim to be prior to meeting. (this would be enforced by catfishes who cannot produce this being barred). I don't mean any sensitive information, but screenshots of their Facebook profile, the requirement that they send said proofs to a trusted 3rd party overseeing the app, or that they Skype chat, etc prior to any plan to meet. If they didn't want to disclose info like last names, their friends names, these could be edited out prior to sending. If there was still a question of the validity of proof, they would have to request a 3rd party for the app investigate the proof and confirm if it is legit.

Click to expand...

I am afraid that manual identity verification by a person (me, for example) cannot be the go to solution. but again I have to raise the option of Facebook login. It is true, that people can use a secondary fake profile (it is possible, though for concept no#1 would be mostly useless) but this will probably be an extreme exception. In case of real foul play, there is still a possible way of getting to the person perpetrating it with the proper court order to Facebook - which is a lot more difficult with regular email/password login.

siamese dream said:

And if you are driving or flying to meet. .. even if you are lucky enough to meet someone a few blocks away... I don't know if this could be required but I think it should at least be highly encouraged, that members share with trusted 3rd party the exact physical location the meeting will take place, and possibly identifying info such as driver's license numbers. Just in case anything criminal should happen and the police are involved or the person is in danger. I also think it should be highly encouraged that both, but in particular the one traveling, to look up and save to their phones the numbers of local authorities of wherever they are traveling.

Click to expand...

How do you think such a feature shoulld be implemented in an app? We can think of ideas as to how to implement something like this int he app, though unless most ladies point it as a highly desired feature - it is probably not going to be a core feature which the app will have at first.
Technically, for example, an app can log one's location - if given the proper permissions. The trade off here may be again that of privacy concerns, as well as bypassing such mechanisms by users.
From the top of my head: There could, for example, be a "follow me" mode, in which the app tracks the user location, and if given an expected meetup - even be aware that the to individuals are in the same location.
The question is - what do people think? Is something like this making one feel more secure and safe, or that their privacy is infringed?

siamese dream said:

I know all this may be unrealistic. But eBay has a feature where u cannot write and send yours or anyone's email address thru the eBay messaging system; if u try the message will automatically censor it. Maybe something like that could be required for sending street addresses and phone numbers to other members until the rules for exchanging proofs to each other & 3rd party have been met?

Click to expand...

It is technically possible, at least to some level of success, but in order to do it properly it may require development work too large for the scope of the first versions of the app. So I am writing this down, and it could be reconsidered at some point, but regardless of the app type eventually developed - this will be a feature added later in its life cycle if at all. For now, people will just have to be cautious as they always should: meet in a public place, and not go anywhere alone with someone they don't know at all...

These are a lot of valuable ideas!
Forgive me for not responding in detail to them right now. Depending on the direction the app will take, and other people's responses - At least some will be raised again and/or considered.

CapturedDoll said:

I like the idea but see so many problems. People can lie... Idk about that one... But... instead of ratings there could be a review section- where the person in question can respond to what is being said. And the responses can't be deleted. (Well Admin could delete them.) Just so the viewer gets both sides of the story. To keep it fair.

Click to expand...

I guess it could work a lot like airbnb, could it?

Erotickles said:

Fair enough, so what are these "proper capabilities" you think it should include?

Click to expand...

By "without proper capabilities", I meant it more like "since I don't currently see a solution for ensuring a person is who they say they are while maintaining anonymity".

CapturedDoll said:

I like the idea but see so many problems. People can lie... Idk about that one...

Click to expand...

What if leaving negative feedback on a guy required you to upload a simple screenshot of what he said?

I'm not sure it's best to involve Facebook at all. I can't speak for everyone but I want to keep my Facebook account a trillion miles away from anything even remotely tickling related.

FootballGuy said:

What if leaving negative feedback on a guy required you to upload a simple screenshot of what he said?

Click to expand...

The issue with this is the veil of anonymity. You could certainly take the screenshot of what one anonymous user with his name said. It's not that hard to clear app data out, make a new account, and continue a trend of predation with it. There's a lot of red flags with any specific fetish-oriented app. Which is why it's good another user suggested something to verify identity to hold an individual really liable. But that takes away from the anonymity (albeit it could be granted initially); I'm not sure people ultimately want a third party involved. It would be nice to have a female-empowered app that lets them sort of screen the situation, but you're going to have pretenders/catfishers in that scenario. A lot of these questions simply have no easy answers. It's trying to essentially force people to behave with anonymity attached---a problem not solved in any media, for sure.

You can also track IP addresses too. I know you can hide/mask them but it's something.

The other thing to remember is that, as a guy, you wouldn't even be able to make first contact. So if you were going to keep wrecking your account by being a dickhead, you'd have to go through the whole process of creating an enticing account (one that women would actually be interested in - one that includes photos) and then waiting for a woman to message you. That could be a long wait.

Getting ahead of things here but if the app were big enough, the company could employ fake female accounts to contact new guys and screen them for bad behavior.

FootballGuy said:

You can also track IP addresses too. I know you can hide/mask them but it's something.

The other thing to remember is that, as a guy, you wouldn't even be able to make first contact. So if you were going to keep wrecking your account by being a dickhead, you'd have to go through the whole process of creating an enticing account (one that women would actually be interested in - one that includes photos) and then waiting for a woman to message you. That could be a long wait.

Getting ahead of things here but if the app were big enough, the company could employ fake female accounts to contact new guys and screen them for bad behavior.

Click to expand...

I'm largely just going through the thought process of negatives with such an app. So, I know it certainly sounds like it's pure negativity, but I'm trying to think of it in a way to hopefully raise a better result. With the matter of IP, as it's going on the Google play store, isn't it out of hands more for IP tracking? I imagine you could put in a complaint to Google, but I wasn't sure what follow-up one could expect there. Similarly, I'm not sure if that's a developer intention to really follow up versus just release this as a test. As for hiding/masking, I don't really put it behind people to exploit loopholes, but I don't want to go too far into negative space.

The enticing aspect is a good point, certainly. I'm a bit more concerned about the immediate backlash since the exploiters go in day-one to usually tank such things (whether for trolling/predation). There was a suggestion about the ability to hide photos for both genders. So, I was considering where there's probably not going to be a huge amount shared at least innately.

In that case, well, if it's purely based off the female member initiating---it may just be quiet for a time. So trolling rewards might be low since I can't imagine this community's membership is too thirsty with that scenario.

I guess I'm struggling with the idea if this app is in anyway better than going through the more established fetlife/other slow social hang-ups. I can't imagine it'd get big enough to the point that it'd be able to employ fake accounts reliably. But on the other hand, it might be possible to do in the initial run as an event-tied app seems like it'd be more useful in bigger cities whereas the likelihood of supporters being around is more likely.

Just my thoughts on it. I tend to be rather interested in these topics since I've dealt with some issues with cosplayers/convention creeping already.

I'm just going to add a bit of my thoughts here:

So... this year in July will be my 40th birthday. And I have been thinking for a couple years now how fun and great it would be to host my own monthly meet up at a Dungeon. And munches on the beach as a supplement so people can meet up before hand. And as a ragtag support group. But, for my birthday I really want to have a night at a dungeon and have been thinking about how to get the money for it. Whether to gofund it or raise it myself through a job. I mean... 40 only comes around once... and I really want to make it special.

So... I was talking about it with my Bf and he said... "I don't want to upset you but... you realize there's a good possibility no one will show up right? Not because people woulden't want to come necessarily... but... between shyness and finances (no matter where I would host this... hotels, food, transportation, clothing budget etc all come into calculating one's finances) "You have to be realistic about that possibility." And I have been but.... hearing him say it though outloud... It didn't kill the idea entirely but it certainly deflated it for the time being.

I also have seen quite a few hosted parties fall apart on Fetlife because no one showed up. Or only one person does.

This is why I am saying I think a map to help people see how many people are in each state/ city- might help these parties come together. Ive been to many fetish parties in the south... and plenty of women came out for those. I guess because they can still blend in with their fetish- aka not say anything about their kink if they don't want to. So... imho... at this point... I think we need an app that people can pull up and see where parties/ munches/ the whole gambit will be happening at a glance. And can see the info with just a click. People don't want pressure of any kind. They want anonymity to keep their fetish quiet if they feel they need to. This shyness has been inside most of us for SO LONG...(including me up until these past few years...) There is no app, website or anything that can coax people out of that if they don't want to. So... the less pressure... the better. Let people be somewhat anonymous. (SOMEWHAT.) That way if they see an event... they may finally decide... for that ONE event.... they might come out for it. Just to see... and maybe... just MAYBE... they'll consider coming out for another... and another... and luck be with the stars... find their soulmate or tickle buddy(ies).

I've been a huge advocate of trying to find ways to help bring everyone together. But... when I had that discussion with my Bf... and realized most might not even come out for ME ( A woman. Forget whether I'm known or not around here. Unless someone upsets me or creeps me out... I'm a fairly guranteed lee and Ler every night out for a Tickle event.) But... I've had to do some reevaluating on all of this. And so... its better to face the realities of this.... work with what can be.... then go in blind and waste money, time, and experience unneccessary dissappointment and heartache. There's been enough of that to go around the planet and back 3 times over within this Community of ours. So... let's try to stay realistic and figure out what might work best for all of us.

That's how I feel. I don't have a Facebook account at all and don't want one. If I did have one I would never want it even remotely connected to tickling.