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Father invites his daughter's bullies to her funeral

Tenebrae

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Mar 21, 2005
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Whenever I hear about this kind of stuff, it makes my heart hurt. A child taking her own life like that...

The father's idea surprised me all the more. I don't wanna judge, but it makes me think a lot. I thought maybe some of you would have something interesting to say on the matter.
 
Something interesting to say? No, it's too sad, and disgusting to those that did the bullying. A young life, full of potential, snuffed because.....? "Oh, she could have been tougher." Yeh, be there, in her shoes. I've kinda been there, I just ignored the jack-o-lanterns, or gave back what they gave. Not everyone can do that tho. Peace be to the young gal. And to hell with her bullies.
 
The only thing I can imagine what the dad was thinking was a look what your actions caused kinda thing
 
This is the kind of story that makes me question my faith in humanity. Beyond sad. &#55357;&#56866;
 
I read this story and my heart was filled with sadness, but also with rage.

The father said he did it to say "here, look what you all did to my little girl". I am a father and I don't think I would have been able to do that without my conscience wanting to beat the hell out of them.

Barbershopman
 
As a relatively new father, I can't even wrap my heart around the thought of losing my daughter.
That he's kept the clarity of mind to do something like invite her bullies to her funeral is a testament to his strength.

I don't even know what I'd do. Nothing good.
 
It's very brave, and shows amazing generosity to the people who killed his daughter; he's offering them a first step towards redemption.
Beating them to a pulp or gunning them down wouldn't bring his child back, but making them see what they've done might save someone else's in the future.
It takes a very strong person to try and make something positive come from this.
 
can't stand the whole bully thing i get making humor at people expense for kidding around purposes but to push people over the edge really sets the human race back
 
I'm of the opinion that forgiveness is supposed to be earned and not given freely.
 
I'm of the opinion that forgiveness is supposed to be earned and not given freely.

In this case, I totally agree.

Bullies are little better than gangsters. Hell, they are gangsters. They should be treated like any other common thug. This girl's father let her tormentors off far too easy.
 
In this case, I totally agree.

Bullies are little better than gangsters. Hell, they are gangsters. They should be treated like any other common thug. This girl's father let her tormentors off far too easy.

Not to take the side of the perpetrator but I can at least understand why bullies do what they do. Before I underwent a major growth spurt, I was bullied by one kid almost constantly in Middle School (so much that they had to take the bully and put him in entirely different classes). I hated his guts with a passion up until I graduated from high school and found out why this kid was trying to make my life a living hell. His father was getting drunk and going to town on both him and his mother almost every single day. I can only imagine the hell that he was going through and the only way he could vent his pain was on me.

He wrote me and every single other kid he bullied an apology letter and now works for a nonprofit to prevent domestic abuse. I feel he's earned my forgiveness. Bullies may be in the wrong but remember to consider why their taking their anger out on others. I of course know that this is no excuse as this time it cost a little girl her life so I hope those bullies try their best to repent and earn that girl's soul's forgiveness.
 
My observation has been that bullies are not tough people. They break down to the point of tears when confronted, so there is often something going on behind the scenes that is a factor in their bullying. That does not excuse it, but it may explain it.
 
Forgiveness - no, it is not earned. It is something that I (or you) decide to do, no matter what the other yokel does. Think of the various religious teachings....along that line of thought, mainly the Christian teachings. Forgiveness is not earned, it is freely given. A poor example: Joeblo likes to kick me in the shins. Hurts like hell, and I hate him for it. Why he does it, I don't know. But for whatever reason, I forgive him of his behavior, and tell him so. Does his behavior stop? Who knows. The other option other than forgiving him is to go out, buy a gun, and end whatever misery he harbors. Think I'll go with the voluntary forgiving idea myself, even if Joeblo hasn't earned it.
 
Forgiveness - no, it is not earned. It is something that I (or you) decide to do, no matter what the other yokel does. Think of the various religious teachings....along that line of thought, mainly the Christian teachings. Forgiveness is not earned, it is freely given. A poor example: Joeblo likes to kick me in the shins. Hurts like hell, and I hate him for it. Why he does it, I don't know. But for whatever reason, I forgive him of his behavior, and tell him so. Does his behavior stop? Who knows. The other option other than forgiving him is to go out, buy a gun, and end whatever misery he harbors. Think I'll go with the voluntary forgiving idea myself, even if Joeblo hasn't earned it.

If that's your belief then that's fine. My belief is that forgiveness is EARNED (either in this life or the next).

I'm not a believer in any Abrahamic religion nor do I believe in any other organized religion.
 
If that's your belief then that's fine. My belief is that forgiveness is EARNED (either in this life or the next).
I'm not a believer in any Abrahamic religion nor do I believe in any other organized religion.

When you lose someone as this father did, you can make that decision.
The ones who are wronged are the ones who make that decision.
 
When you lose someone as this father did, you can make that decision.
The ones who are wronged are the ones who make that decision.

The wronged can't always tell the person who wronged them that they are forgiven. Do you assume that the soul of a person killed, raped and murdered, tortured to death, or even bullied to suicide automatically forgiveness the pain others caused them? If so then that's your belief, not mine.
 
The wronged can't always tell the person who wronged them that they are forgiven. Do you assume that the soul of a person killed, raped and murdered, tortured to death, or even bullied to suicide automatically forgiveness the pain others caused them? If so then that's your belief, not mine.

The hyperbole is meaningless in this argument, and it doesn't give your opinion any more weight than anyone else's.
The kid's dead; that's awful enough. You don't have to embellish it with "what if"s.
How do you earn forgiveness if the wronged party has no say in the matter? Is it a point system? Penance?
And what good is forgiveness if given by someone who's not been affected by the bad act? You could just buy it, then, couldn't you (it's been done)?
Forgiveness is up to the person offering it. Even if it's only to themselves.
 
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