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Tickle fetish resulting from fear of sex/intimacy?

K

kevinhart

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Someone commented on this possibility in another thread, so I thought I'd bring it up in its own thread.

Is there any evidence that the tickle fetish could exist in conjunction with, or perhaps be the result of, a fear of intimacy? I would be curious if anyone who has the fetish self-reports a fear of intimacy, or if anyone has heard this theory before.

I hadn't ever made this connection myself before I read about this possibility on another thread, but ever since I started thinking about it, I could see how tickling almost could symbolize a forced pleasure, i.e., one person taking control of another's body and making them feel the pleasure that they otherwise try to avoid due to fears of getting close to another person or whatever.

Any thoughts?
 
Power and control aspects can tie into all 'action fetishes' (paraphilia) and play a part in how they work for a specific individual.

Your specific question boils down to "Can tickling become a replacement behavior for someone who lacks the skills to pursue normal intimacy channels with another" This is form of displacement in behavior that can certainly develop for some folks, and become the pathway they can only interact thru. The control and power aspects then become yet another layer on top of the behavior that cause their own arousals and such.

So yes. It's possible, but then so are almost any set of conditions when it comes to human sexuality. The system where we learn what arouses us is fundamentally shoddy, and produces all sorts of odd things. Yours above is not common, but nor is it rare either.

Most of the people that hold an attraction to tickling tend to key on the power aspect in some way, either taking control of another, or loosing it to another. This power aspect is a deep and common thread in sexualities, and you'll see it mapped onto fetish after fetish with variations tuned to the behaviors specific needs/aspects.

Myriads
 
I think its more of a precursor. Before we think about intercourse or playing with naughty bits the first flirtatious/intimate interactions we have is horseplay and tickling etc. I think its more chicken and egg etc.
 
I can only speak for myself here, but I find this question rather odd :confused: I have a massive tickling (and foot) fetish, along with some other domination and sadistic torture fantasies, but it's not for fear of sex. Quite the opposite, in fact, these fantasies turn me on so much! I could say that if anything, tickling triggers a desire for sex, which is why my wife tends to get a bit jealous when I playfully tickle a female friend. In fact, each session with my wife is quasi-systematically concluded with passionate lovemaking. And I have a normal sexual life otherwise; I don't need to tickle my partner to function normally, although when I get very aroused, it tends to happen :devil:

The only thing that might approach what you described is that I have zero vanilla porn on 100+gb porn stash. None. At. All. It does not turn me on to see a man and a woman engaged in raw sex, especially since porn stars tend to be so unattractive and vulgar to begin with. I'm always like: "When the hell is he gonna start to torture her? :laughhard: Plus, I find penises rather ugly; it's kind of a turnoff for me to see another man naked. I wouldn't call that fear of sex though, thank Heavens!
 
It may depend on when it manifests. I began becoming "excited" at the sight of women's bare feet at the age of 7 or 8, then tickling them, and by puberty, it was the only thing that sexually aroused me. Eventually, other ticklish body parts were added. I've never had the urge for intercourse, or any other sexual act that involves genitalia. Thus, I don't consider myself a true deviant because you can't deviate from the norm when you were never in the "norm zone" in the first place. So no, I never feared genital action. I simply never wanted to do it. I have done intercourse and never becamse aroused. I neither know nor care why. I simply developed differently. My point here is not to assume that everyone begins in the "norm zone," then deviates, either out of fear or whatever. I realize most on this forum use tickling merely as foreplay. Whatever floats your boat between consenting adults is fine by me.
 
It can be. It can also be an alleviation of such thoughts; I think in dating everyone kind of pussyfoots around their sexual interests before both parties decide to go for it. But tickling I also developed an interest in when I found it was like a violation and the thought kind of aroused me; having a secret like sensitivity be discovered or discovering it, it's like something different that just works.

The only thing that might approach what you described is that I have zero vanilla porn on 100+gb porn stash. None.
Click to expand...

I'm the same way here unless I'm looking from a different fetish angle; I think the concept of sex (probably from even as early as the classroom) is it's "serious", "religiously forbidden" (there's tons of religious panic spread about about spiritual purity, heaven/hell, waiting till marriage, Allah, thousands of virgins), explicit, and only appropriate when having families. After a while one portion of people listened way too closely, potentially stunted themselves and one portion passively listened and likely broke every concern listed above on the way. So it suddenly becomes normal for us (while compared to vanilla people we're mental)

Tickling or my other fetishes just take that edge entirely off and make things feel more appropriate.
 
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I don’t understand the logic at all. Why would it follow that a person with a fear of intimacy would develop a tickling fetish which, to you, symbolizes forced pleasure? Isn’t THAT what you are figuring is characteristic of the intimacy fear? I could understand if you surmised that a person who fears sexual intimacy would shy away from intimate behaviors (e.g. tickle power play). Why would one lead to the other, though?
 
GirlMeetsTickle said:
I don’t understand the logic at all. Why would it follow that a person with a fear of intimacy would develop a tickling fetish which, to you, symbolizes forced pleasure? Isn’t THAT what you are figuring is characteristic of the intimacy fear? I could understand if you surmised that a person who fears sexual intimacy would shy away from intimate behaviors (e.g. tickle power play). Why would one lead to the other, though?
Click to expand...

I can't speak for OP —*as an aside, pretty wild that Kevin Hart posts under his real name here — but the way I interpreted it, the idea is that if you fear intimacy on, like, an emotional level, you can't imagine engaging in it unless you're physically forced to. Like, there's some kind of mental block there, and tickling somehow obliterates it, if that makes any sense.

For what it's worth, I have the fetish (duh doy), and while I wouldn't necessarily say I **fear** intimacy (emotional or physical), I have a pronounced disinclination towards it. Which, when you get down to it, I suppose is basically the same thing.
 
No fear of intimacy here! I can be a bit much for my boyfriends with my demands for their attention when they're around lol. But tickling and my love life don't mix at all. I don't tickle boys and they don't tickle me or they get a good smack or punch on the arm! Tickling for me is yes about control and almost always it's about other girls.

I did have one bf that I tickled on the reg to get him to obey I guess. But he was the only one. He was very sensitive and kind of subby and it was just so fun to be the dominant one with him lol.
 
You guys are a bunch of jerks. LOL.

Anyway, yeah, someone clarified upthread what I was getting at I guess, which is that maybe tickling could be viewed as forced intimacy and thus the mental barrier to intimacy that some people have is forced to be broken when they are tickled. Not sure if this is getting too deep, sort of like a 3 am conversation when you're stoned, or if I'm just weird. Maybe a little of each. At least I wrote a couple of good tickling stories. Ah well.
 
I think sharing my tickling fetish is a way that I show my trust and desire FOR intimacy!
 
Who can you rely on to be a bunch of jerks, kev, more than us featherbrains, I ask ya?<p>
But, seriously (?)...<br>
I wouldn't presume to try to explain someone else's interest in tickling, but I do know that anything is possible, even using tickling to compensate for a fear of intimacy or to overcome a partner's fear.<br> I find Myriad's reference to displacement plausible and Palad's mention of precursor as either creepy or charming (and probably both).<p>For myself, tickling has been an on-ramp to the freeway of intimacy, rather than a detour--and if that seems at all profound, it may be because you're an infrastructure engineer as well as a ticklephile.
 
"Featherbrains"? I like that :laughhard: It looks like one of those terms one can see in William Gibson's novels.
 
I relate to this. I've always felt somewhat uncomfortable with sex and could only have it with somebody I really know. And it is kind of out of fear of intimacy. And tickling is such a big part of sex for me, I can't separate the two.
 
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