Lonely Extremist

So...
I am still very lonely in my style of our fetish.
I found no one who like the same things I do, and i'm not talking about someone to tickle.
I'm talking about someone to talk about it and share ideas, a friend with the same desires.

In a way, maybe, I do not have a Tickling Fetish. Maybe, for me, Tickling Fetish is just a Tool to get what I "need".
I desire the laughing body. The extreme laughter where the body of the 'lee succumbs to the reflexes of nothing but laughter.
And in a very few words, that is all. ofcourse it's much more complex than that, but that is the essence of what I enjoy most.

I envy others with much more simpler take of it. those who tickle feet and love the screaming.
I do like armpits as the best ticklish spot, but that too, as a way to the means.

on top of that, it's all so dark, in my mind, that I sometimes scare myself.

What are your thoughts ?

B.n.

Hi mch5

I think there are a few "variations" of this fetish, and everyone experiences it in a different way. Some like the laughter part most, some like to exercise control, to dominate. For others it's just seeing the 'lee break etc. etc.

So I don't believe that it's just you that has this particular take on the fetish. There probably are a few in the forum like you!

I bet you'll find people who - if they don't have the "same desires" - at least understand you. And even if it sounds stupid, I think it's legitimate to say: Be a bit more patient

Regards

after 25 years of being aware to what this fetish means to me (my take of it)... Patience is running low

I think of sometimes like a drug, the "high" comes from a successful session. And addicts were crave different things, we do different things out of desperation. The real question is what kind of ideas do you want to share? We all have darkness, but each is specific

There's a line I always use, when I'm about to do a session, as a joke, but it's a very Dark joke that sum up my desires quite well.
"I'm going to tickle you to death!... just... without the dying part."

And it scares me because I am, usually, a very gentle man.
Even in sessions, I'm very careful in what I do to the woman, even if she is willing to go further beyond some limits. I don't want to hurt anyone [and frankly, i don't trust her ability to say the safe word] And in my mind, I want her to Die Laughing!... ofcourse, without the death thing

All this psychological stupid, it's a mess.
I am embarrassed to admit, I almost ordered a custom made video with all the smallest details of my take om the fetish, in full understanding, and comfort, that it'll be just an act! "A clip went wrong" I called it.
I felt like a psychopath.

Did u really want the clip to include mock death?

It's an expression millions have people have used in context with sex, laughter, and life in general.

A lot of us say or write things like what you just did. You're not a psychopath! It just means the lee is going to experience an overload of sensations. Notice no one ever says... "I've going to tickle you to birth." Though some might say: "You'll be reborn". Meaning you will understand a bliss or higher ground. An awakening. They call orgasms "the little death". Sex and death have been intertwined forever. Here are some quotes throughout history. I think you have heard Laughter, Sex, Orgasms, and everyday life/feelings: all be related in some way to death over the years. And general quotes that people say every day. And ultimately what so many of us has said MEANS: You will be happier (or laugh) more than you have ever experienced in your entire LIFE. You might even "See God". Or: "Meet the Devil". The mind and body get taken to such a pleaurable (or torturous) place with Tickling. Or BDSM pain. (Whippings, spankings etc) It is a journey the body and mind go through towards orgasm. Or head space. Or even meditation.

"If you become silent after your laughter, one day you will hear God also laughing, you will hear the whole existence laughing — trees and stones and stars with you."— Osho

My family loves my boyfriend as much as I do, so they were just tickled to death to hear that we're getting married."

" Your mother is really tickled to death that you've decided to go to her alma mater."

“And is death not the ultimate orgasm, a return to that otherworldly ether, whose very origins were indeed a Big Bang, the ultimate explosion, the supreme chaos, whose resonance is the vibration we constantly seek to reproduce in everything we do.”
― Lydia Lunch


These next 2 quotes from Osho I post here because not everyone believes death is the end. But the beginning...

"Death is the most misunderstood phenomenon. People have thought of death as the end of life. That is the first, basic misunderstanding." Osho

“Death is not the end, but the beginning of a new life. Yes, it is an end of something that is already dead. It is also a crescendo of what we call life, although very few know what life is. They live, but they live in such ignorance that they never encounter their own life. And it is impossible for these people to know their own death, because death is the ultimate experience of this life, and the beginning experience of another. Death is the door between two lives; one is left behind, one is waiting ahead." Osho

BDSM quotes:

"Lust's passion will be served; it demands, it militates, it tyrannizes." -Marquis De Sade

"Your body is the church where Nature asks to be reverenced."- Marquis De Sade

"Crime is the soul of lust. What would pleasure be if it were not accompanied by crime? It is not the object of debauchery that excites us, rather the idea of evil."- Marquis De Sade

“Fear can be a potent aphrodisiac.”
― Kele Moon, Beyond Eden

"Right on the edge of fear, is where trust would grow". - Cherise Sinclair

"S&M is as psychological as it is physical and sexual, Zach. Imagine being as deep inside a woman’s mind as you are inside her body.”- Tiffany Reisz

“I do not want to be the leader. I refuse to be the leader. I want to live darkly and richly in my femaleness. I want a man lying over me, always over me. His will, his pleasure, his desire, his life, his work, his sexuality the touchstone, the command, my pivot. I don’t mind working, holding my ground intellectually, artistically; but as a woman, oh, God, as a woman I want to be dominated. I don’t mind being told to stand on my own feet, not to cling, be all that I am capable of doing, but I am going to be pursued, fucked, possessed by the will of a male at his time, his bidding.”
― Anaïs Nin


Read this:

https://writingexplained.org/idiom-dictionary/tickled-to-death

And this- "La Petite Mort"

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/La_petite_mort

Also check this out:
http://www.thesaurus.com/browse/tickled to death


If you truly want someone to die through tickling. Yes get counseling. But... if you don't (which is pretty obvious in what you have written here) and you understand what I have shown you here.... you are FINE. Please stop overthinking this. lol

Palad said:

Did u really want the clip to include mock death?

Click to expand...

as I wrote: ofcourse, without the death thing

Unless you are saying something that I am missing, mch5, you are describing very well my own tickling impulse. Some of us - quite a lot of us - are fascinated by the way tickling - and sex - can be used to go to the abyss and back. But for some reason I have never felt that it is a sign of a mixed-up mind. We are playing with something potentially dangerous, just like electricity is dangerous, but we want to use it creatively. We don't actually want to do harm, but we do want to flirt with the boundaries. It's a personality style - some of us are more that way than others. But I think it is a real aspect of existence, not something to be ashamed of being drawn to. It won't go away. It is part of being alive.

Captured Doll made a lot of sense in her post above. She knows what you and I are talking about.

Just for Grins and Giggles I'm not sure that the Marquis decide is the best person to quote as being OK...

matt62 said:

Unless you are saying something that I am missing, mch5, you are describing very well my own tickling impulse. Some of us - quite a lot of us - are fascinated by the way tickling - and sex - can be used to go to the abyss and back. But for some reason I have never felt that it is a sign of a mixed-up mind. We are playing with something potentially dangerous, just like electricity is dangerous, but we want to use it creatively. We don't actually want to do harm, but we do want to flirt with the boundaries. It's a personality style - some of us are more that way than others. But I think it is a real aspect of existence, not something to be ashamed of being drawn to. It won't go away. It is part of being alive.

Captured Doll made a lot of sense in her post above. She knows what you and I are talking about.

Click to expand...

Thank you I really do understand

Palad said:

Just for Grins and Giggles I'm not sure that the Marquis decide is the best person to quote as being OK...

Click to expand...

I was on the fence too but it's for the quotes. And irony. Though as I am not a Marquis De Sade Historian... let's keep to the thread topic lol.

I don't suppose you're as alone as you feel, mch5.

In retrospect, the way I describe my own erotic interests – particularly the essence or roots of them – resembles almost nothing else I've found. But when I wrote stories to encapsulate the precise dynamics I found most interesting, people have tended to respond and resonate. Describing and openly exploring sexual concepts with words is not everyday culture on this planet right now, so loneliness and discrepancies should be expected even when a lot of people are thinking and feeling similarly.

Secondly, I've found people online make surprisingly little effort to introspect and unpack their feelings. This is less rare (you decided to start this thread, for example). It's fun to post things and watch people enjoy them, but I've done rather little interacting with people in any medium; I think largely because anyone whose company I would enjoy would be almost more enraptured by that process of unpacking, comparing, gawking at a little implication here, rejoicing at finding an incidental shared abstract thought there. It seems odd since I find that impulse as fulfilling as any erotic experience; or rather, it seems almost like part of any erotic experience worth having.

And don't forget that a large contingent is always too shy to post – essentially invisible and inaudible for now – and the shiest can be the loudest and richest thinkers and dreamers.

If you are genuinely concerned for your mental well being, look for a kink friendly therapist to talk things out. They do exist.

I think you just have to accept yourself. You are a nice person, and everyone was light and darkness inside, and the best thing is to accept and use your dark side to serve for the good. And tickling is one of the coolest things to do that. Making people smile and laugh is really a gift.