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10 Minutes In Heaven

CapturedDoll

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Jul 27, 2014
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10 minutes in Heaven

My Boyfriend and I have been through a LOT in the year and a half. I haven’t been tickled in that entire time. Except for once in awhile - a tickle in passing. 5-20 seconds. I know you are thinking…. WTH? But… it’s just been THAT ROUGH of a year for both of us. Life issues. Simply put.

We finally made love about 3 weeks ago. (without tickling which was fine- it was just wonderful to be close to him again). Our orgasms after all that time were just wonderful. *sigh* :) We planned for the next weekend to be a tickling session just for me. :)

But… 2 Saturdays ago when I was to FINALLY going to have a session: I accidentally smacked myself in the mouth with a leg spreader: (I was looking for our restraints.) ~So.. it didn’t happen. I was heartbroken. (And what a headache…) So by this past Saturday my sexual frustration was beyond belief. My body was literally, painfully... aching for it. I cried and fretted for most of the day wondering if it was going to happen. I had other reasons for being sad but… that was the top reason. But now in retrospect… I’m really happy it didn’t. What followed is much better. Idk how he would have approached the previous session. But… this was meant to be.

So this last Saturday night (May 12th) around midnight: we sat together and he began to talk about what to we should do as far how to begin with Tickling again. It’s like we are both coming from this place of not only newbs essentially…( lee newb mode for me…) but we are starting from scratch as Master and slave. He understand more noe of what I need now with the conversation we had below here. And is in full support of it. He does enjoy tickling me because it gets me so turned on. Which makes him happy. But he has his needs too. I think we both lost in each other this year with so many issues in the way. We became confused of each other. Even angry and upset. What DOES the other expect? So many questions… But after that first initial night together… we were ready to trust each other again. And explore where we go from here. This will be the first night in giving me what I need.

After some initial conversation about different aspects of our wants and desires. He suggested a time limit of 5-10 minutes. That way I didn’t expect SO much to only end up disappointed. If it wasn't long enough. Which was GREAT. Not only was I very tired after the day I had. But… I would fully know what to expect. And he wouldn't feel pressured to know if enough was enough for me. The pressure of being with a Fetishist such as I has been overwhelming to him and frustrating. I understand that. I have been been consumed with my needs. And he became consumed with his. Also its been a pressure on him that... he didn't think he COULD fulfill my fantasies. But we never really had this discussion below.

I from the beginning of our BDSM relationship relied on him to guide me in the BDSM practices. Now... he told me that night he takes responsibility for… never really discussing what it is WE should do with ME. He DID to an extent but I still relied on him to guide me. I trusted him implicitly. But I never had the chance to convey to him accurately what I needed. I really couldn't with Pain or even with Tickling: Yes I have tons of fantasies but telling someone them… that was difficult for me. It was like my brain turned to mush for years. AlI I knew was I wanted to explore my S&M fantasies of pain and non consent. To me that was to be left in the hands of my Dominant. And with barely a brief mention of Tickling… it was pretty much forgotten about. (I have talked about how one night he had me confront myself in the mirror about my fetish and that was freeing… that was talked about either in a vid in my dropbox (which is unaccessible at this time) or I wrote about it. Either way I won’t go into that again here. But as many times as he DID try to tickle me… I was usually always upset afterwards. I guess I expected him to just KNOW what to do. Or ask me questions. He never did. Well… as we all know tickling is far more complicated than that to the casual observer. Especially for us here. And especially when you (I ) had/have problems talking about these specific fanatasies: I realized a few things about myself… and I needed him to realize these things as well.

So after we discussed the time limit. I told him I’d like for him to ask me questions... that no posts of mine should be read at this point. (He really never did- this isn't his "thing". And again life issues drew us apart.) He himself needs to start to understand my tickling needs, desires, lack of lee experience, and headspace. For him he said at one point: “It’s kinda weird for me to.. after this length of time… nearly 10 years together… that we are starting from the beginning. But if that's what we have to do to be happy again… then I'm all for it.” I said in return: "Well... I’m lost now after everything we’ve been through. Maybe you could just ask me questions as if we are a new Master & slave couple?" He agreed.. with a nod and a smile. I could see the AHA thoughts begin to form in his mind. That seemed to be the catalyst to get the ball rolling. Also the time limit he set rang bells with me into how starting over again can be accomplished.

It’s funny in a way… the simple things like questions and even time limits never have entered the picture. For me, and I only speak for myself… when you think you know everything about something… maybe it's possible you jumped 10 squares ahead… when you should be starting at square one. Thats never been me to start at square one. Hell I never even read the directions usually. I just try to figure things out myself. But over these past few years… I know MUCH more about what it takes to start at square one with future lees as a Ler. But in lee mode… I AM a newb boob. (Yeah I just wrote that… cute huh? lolololol ) :)

This may be the key for a lot of struggling relationships. Going back to square one. Even in regular sex I am back to square one. I cannot say I understand my body or needs in OTHER sexual acts. I think for a long time I was lying to myself and certainly others about what made me feel good, or what I liked. I’ve been on my own since I was 15 ½. So… movies and bdsm porn, magazines, the rare tickle porn, then ASFT... shared stories with friends... these were my own clues for reference. And I only cared about giving others a good time. I was afraid to give up control. How I would look. What I would feel. I turned off my own feelings of pleasure. And focused my mind to find pleasure in making others sexually happy. It was the memories I would have always. I could always cum later by myself. Now that was certainly a disastrous plan that I didn’t realize would have such long term effects. One’s that I couldn't see how they would affect me so far away into the future. But here I am now. Those past effects have caught up with me. And now we have to untangle them together.

So, he began to ask me questions:

“What do you imagine your dream Tickler being like. What is it you want you want to feel like… And what does Tickling feel like for you. What does it actually make you feel… to be tickled” (He asked these all separately but I will splice them together and my answers.)

Me: *blushing* (Even though I had initiated the questions part… To be asked these questions practically blew my mind. A blushathon ensued.) “Well… I want to feel like I am with a rabid, Tickling obsessed person. Almost like an actual stalker or Villain. Whose sole purpose is to tickle me out of my mind. I want to be/feel captured. I want to be forced into being tickled. I don’t want to be asking for it or begging for it. I don’t like that. I want to be FORCED to endure it. I want to feel like I have actually been abducted.”

“Tickling makes me feel helpless, vulnerable. Tickled feels amazing.. it's a high… and feels so good to me. But…. it’s also very much an intense TORTURE for me. Heaven & Hell rolled into one. But I want to be held against my will… and zero choice in preventing it.

He smiled... very much seeming to understand me. I felt a sense of relief.

Him: What are some of the phrases you like hearing. I know some of the words that turn you on like Ticklish, tickling. But what is the context of how you see me approaching you?

Me: Anything that conveys how helpless I am. And how ticklish I am. Being held prisoner. What one would say to someone who might want to escape. Basically: I’m going to go through this whether I like it or not. If you’re a Villain… like the Joker… to get inside my head and use everything about me into the session to destroy me mentally and physically. (I differentiated that the latest incantation of the Joker is not what I have in mind. We laughed and agreed that yeah: he is just too much of a monster lololol) (It’s not the Joker I have in mind… it’s the embodiment itself of Villains in general.)

Him: What do you imagine happening tonight. We have this time limit. And I know how tired you are. I’m tired too. But.. what you like to happen or see happening?”

I realized at one point something that I already knew but had never asked for. I always wanted to… but it to me seemed silly to do so. And admitting I was starting from such a square one that… Idk. I just never asked any partner before. Like a lot of people here… saying the tickle words… I couldn’t. So to explain to anyone anything was practically non existent. What do I see happening tonight?

Me: “I would like an exploration of my tickle spots. Just to relax and let you explore me. I enjoy light tickling, medium and deep. So… if you could do a combination of all three… and mix it up so that… like… I’m always surprised? I tense up a lot.. almost to avoid succumbing to the feeling… it embarrasses me I think… to let go? So.. I just want to relax… without bondage… I’ll hold still… ( as much as I can…) and just let YOU explore my tickle spots.” ( I was out of breath like I had run up a flight of stairs just saying that.) He liked this idea. He nodded and smiled in agreement.

We then talked about safewords. And he started to say things like:

“So it embarrass’s you and turns you on…. when I say certain words… I know it turns you on but... how does it embarrass you… please explain that”.

Me: “Well not exactly it just… I couldn't grasp the word I was looking for. “I don’t know the word but it’s not embarrassment.”

Him: “It flusters you…”

Me: “YES. That’s IT!!”

(I forget now the other questions he asked me sadly.) One last thing was told to me. This would be a non sexual tickling session. Which I had wanted for some time. And want sometimes in the future.

We both felt GREAT about our conversation and both were smiling by the end. I was so turned on being asked those questions and having to answer them… I was flustered for sure. But so ready to get started. :) He told me to get up and let’s go into the bedroom. As I walked I heard him say behind me… “I’m going to tickle you…” That made me quicken my pace to the bedroom. (giggling nervously) Not because I wanted to get there faster for it to begin… but I felt like I was “running away”. (Part of my capture fantasies ya know?) But I didn’t do it intentionally… he just said it in the way that I had always wanted to hear it… with sadistic amusement and dark INTENT.

Inside the bedroom. (I think the total duration was 20 minutes actually)

He took my hands and placed them onto the top of the canopy. “I think I’m going to warm you up… warm up your nerves to make you more ticklish.” He grinned at me and looked at me out of the corner of his eyes. But first he took off my aqua spaghetti strap shirt. “You certainly won’t be needing this anymore.” His fingers then began to lightly trace and gently spider tickle down from my wrists to underarms.

“I wonder how ticklish you are.. HERE…” Down my arms into my underarms. He was smiling near the entire time. I knew he was going to have fun with this. He went to legs… making me shriek with laughter as he tickled them lightly.

“I see how ticklish your underarms are… let’s see if they are still ticklish… Hmmm…” He slowly worked his way back to them… lightly tickling them going deeper and deeper. For whatever reason in that moment I wasn't very ticklish there. I bit my lip and held my body up straight -almost defiantly.

He began to tickle lightly all over me… up and down my body. Here and there he would prod and sometimes tickle at light /medium deep. I was far more ticklish than I thought I would be. But I was determined not to laugh if I wasn’t actually ticklish in certain spots. (In the past I have laughed and giggled a lot out of pure nervousness. Not actual ticklishness. Like I said to… I would get embarrassed… and highly flustered. But this time I was determined to be the girl that meets an actual tickler… as if I didn’t have the fetish myself.

Out of nowhere he jumped to my waist and tickled me deeply. The laughter poured out of me loudly. I squirmed and lifting my knees, one at a time, trying to hunch over. Until finally I couldn't take it anymore and put my arms down to protect myself. “Bad girl… I can’t have that. Get onto the bed…”

I laid down on the bed. I was beaming. *^_^* To see his face smiling sadistically was one of the best thrills of the night. He leaned over me and spread my arms to either side of the beds. Then he spread my legs. (I had taken off my shoes before we began btw. I also was wearing little aqua booty shorts.) “Don’t move… you're mine now… and aren’t going ANYWHERE. I’ll catch you if you try to run away from me… and the tickling will far worse than you could have EVER imagined. (I could have cum to that sentence alone if he had let me.)

He sat on the edge of the bed. To the right of me. And he started tickling at my wrists. The ticklish feeling built up slowly and soon I was trying to move my wrist. He then clasped my fingers with his… and pulled my hand taut, back against the beds. He was taunting me wickedly the.. “A lot of people don’t know how ticklish the hands are… but you will now... Riiiiight HERE.” Between my thumb and first finger he lightly strayed his find over the web. I know hands can be ticklish but… the fact that HE knew that… I was getting shocked and getting nervous. The feeling was making me squirm… it was irritating in a way… in a good way. But then he started slowly tickling my palm. And I shocked myself by the laughter that rang out from my throat. My palms are quite ticklish! Omgoodness… *^_^* He would go back and forth.. taking his time… I can’t believe this was turning me on… And he noticed.

Mmmm… is this turning you on. I bet it is… He leaned over then to my legs… right at the edge of my booty shorts by my pussy. Right between my legs. He started wiggling his forefinger against the skin.. it was so close to pussy. I LAUGHED LIKE MAD. Eventually I lifted my legs…. and of course he ordered the back down. He went back to tickling that spot and I was dying from laughter. Eventually he went to the opposite spot, on the other side. I was just as ticklish there. Full throat laughter. ****^_^****

Then he darted for my waist again. AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAH NOAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!! My head was thrashing side to side. Then dug into my underarms. I was determined not to move and I didn’t really… But BOY was it HARD. I did squirm but did nothing to cover myself.

Suddenly he started tickling one of my knees. It made me lift my upper body up a bit from the very ticklish shock.

You are VERY ticklish here… I wonder where else… He stood up then and moved to the end of the bed.

“Oh no….”

I was thinking to myself… omg I don’t want to get turned on… sometimes I get so turned on so I’m not ticklish on my feet. And I tense them to to not feel it as I had always down. But… I relaxed my feet and soon… that damn spider tickling of one of my arches got me. AHAHAHAHAH!!! No NO!!!! AHAHAHA!! Not that was medium laughter… and soon it started to fade because I as getting turned on. But… then he went at my toes. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH ahaAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA! FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!!!! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

I knew my toes were ticklish… but DAMN. I couldn't even scrunch them. I had the thought I should but I didn’t. Which gave me the full onslaught of the torture. Omg it drove me into hysterics. Then he did the same to my other barefoot. Slowly tickling the arch… producing moderate giggling. And then straight for toes. AAAAAAAAHHHHH HAHAHAHAHHAHAHA!!!! The thrashing of my head began once again.

“Mmmmmmm…. your feet are very VERY ticklish… I LIKE THAT…” He walked around the bed and told me to flip over.

I laid myself into the same position and felt him sit on my lower back/butt. He had never done that like that before… *NERVOUS*

He lifted my hair and began tickling lightly at my neck. The ticklishness was slow to rise but I began to to try and twist my neck away a the giggles grew. And then he surprised me by tickling both of ears. “I KNOW how ticklish these are… AREN’T THEY…” My laughter was so intense and immediate. I laughed hard into my pillow. I would lift my head to breath and the laughter was just out of control. Back and forth between my neck and ears. Usually both are extremely ticklish but my ears were the winner that night between the two. O.M.G!!

Then he starts lightly tickling my back. OH MY GAAAAAAAahahahHHAHAHAHahAH AHHAHAHAHAHAH. I didn’t realize how ticklish my back could be. With light tickling I was hysterical. He loved that… taunting me how ticklish I was there. It went on and on. But then out of nowhere he jumped straight to my butt. AAAAAAAAAAAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA!!! NO NO NO N O PLEAEEHEHEHEHEH AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA!!! It’s just one of my worst spots. Unbelievable still to me. Right underneath my butt too at the tops of my legs. He worked his way down to my thighs producing the same amount of hysteria. It was AMAZING.

Finally he laid down on top of my back and kissed my neck making me giggle and squirm. Then laid there hugging me for a while. After he got off of me. I was in such a blissful state. We kissed passionately and I cuddled him so intimately. But I began to cry. “It’s ok… he told me calmly. I said something to him he couldn't hear and had me repeat. Through my tears I said:

“I feel beautiful…”

“You are beautiful”. He wrapped his arms around me as I cried. After a while I finally had to force myself to stop by going to the bathroom and splash cold water on my face. My emotions, my mind, my body was lit with a happiness and depth of heart that was hard to control. But I wanted to stop that and just feel the joy and the after effects of the tickling. So when I was ready I went back to the bed and laid with him. Calm and happy. (Thrilled)

I laid my head on his legs. I laid in his arms. And finally I had to lay myself on top of him. I was all over him kissing him and cuddling with him. We must have cuddled for at least an hour. I didn’t want to let go of him. The cuddling itself was so passionate. So warm and all consuming. Absolute bliss.

2 hours of talking. 20 minutes of tickling. An hour of cuddling.

I entitled this ten minutes but… as you can see.. it was anything but.

Thank you Master. I LOVE YOU.

What an amazing rebeginning… And the next day I floated all around the condo… feeling sexier, and happier than I have felt in a very long time.

I like square one. Don’t you? *^_^*

<3

Doll
 
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I saw this before going to sleep last night. Reading about your lovely and intimate experience was really fun and hot. The best part was the talking and connecting with your boyfriend about your needs. Tickling is connecting. Peace.
 
I put it back. Sometimes I just get really self conscience if no one says anything.

(Course now I'll have to go through it AGAIN for another edit because I still saw mistakes. *sigh* I'm drinking my coffee first lol).

Anyway, thank you both. :)
 
Wow. This must be one of the most personal things I've ever read on these forums. I love your writing and I'm happy for you that you've managed to reconnect like that. Thanks for sharing.
 
Wow. This must be one of the most personal things I've ever read on these forums. I love your writing and I'm happy for you that you've managed to reconnect like that. Thanks for sharing.

Thank you Dave. :) It is really personnal and thats why I became self conscious and took it down. Thinking maybe it was TOO personnal. But... its back and if this can help other couples then its worth staying up. Plus i'm proud of us being able to get back to this point. :) So thank you so much. *hugs*
 
That's an amazing thread! Evil dave is right, i don't think i've ever come across a more intimate, personal and romantic story on the TMF. I alway's love a happy ending...'sniff'.
 
That's an amazing thread! Evil dave is right, i don't think i've ever come across a more intimate, personal and romantic story on the TMF. I alway's love a happy ending...'sniff'.

:eek: Thank you draven. :)
 
I put it back. Sometimes I just get really self conscience if no one says anything.

(Course now I'll have to go through it AGAIN for another edit because I still saw mistakes. *sigh* I'm drinking my coffee first lol).

Anyway, thank you both. :)
I'm glad that you put it back because I missed it the first time. Amazing description of an incredible erotic experience! Thanks for sharing it with us. :D
 
This was a fantastic, honest outpouring - a fine example of how something so many of us struggle with (getting our partner to understand our headspace) can be achieved by simply having an honest conversation with one's partner. Thank you for writing it and especially for putting it back up!
 
This was a fantastic, honest outpouring - a fine example of how something so many of us struggle with (getting our partner to understand our headspace) can be achieved by simply having an honest conversation with one's partner. Thank you for writing it and especially for putting it back up!

I appreciate that so much Eddie! :)

Yes, I think the key is... having your partner ask questions instead of giving the answers FIRST. I guess it would be like.. giving the answers to a history test to someone... but... if the person doesn't have the questions... the answers are lost in translation. It seemed to open him up to get the understanding HE needed. Putting the control back in his hands. (And the frame to understand me through his eyes.) Whether a couple is in a BDSM relationship or not... I guess it could be said it might be time to go back to the days of Truth or Dare. (but saving the dares for later...)

Anyway, thank you I'm really happy you enjoyed reading my current life story. :) It wasn't easy posting this in the first place. I was really nervous. I'm always nervous though when I post something. It's just how I am. At least until the first comment then I can breath again lol. :)
 
Im glad you had a good time and could really enjoy yourself.
 
Last Saturday night?

We 2 ticklees may have been laughing at the same time.

My girlfriend mummified and tickled me last Saturday. We used saran wrap and it worked. I like to think she captured me. She kept me giggling for over 20 minutes. And she tickled me again the next morning, though we didn't use bondage. We get into tickle fights almost everyday. I'm way more ticklish than she is, and she definitely beats me.
 
Last Saturday night?

We 2 ticklees may have been laughing at the same time.

My girlfriend mummified and tickled me last Saturday. We used saran wrap and it worked. I like to think she captured me. She kept me giggling for over 20 minutes. And she tickled me again the next morning, though we didn't use bondage. We get into tickle fights almost everyday. I'm way more ticklish than she is, and she definitely beats me.

Ha! Thats awesome! :) Tickled in unison in other parts of the world. Let the laughter ring... ;)
 
Last Saturday night?

We 2 ticklees may have been laughing at the same time.

My girlfriend mummified and tickled me last Saturday. We used saran wrap and it worked. I like to think she captured me. She kept me giggling for over 20 minutes. And she tickled me again the next morning, though we didn't use bondage. We get into tickle fights almost everyday. I'm way more ticklish than she is, and she definitely beats me.

Thanks for sharing your experience.
 
It's already been said, but bares repeating, Captured Doll, you have both the amazing talent to risk much with your writing, and simply, to write beautifully and elegantly. Thank you for sharing this story here on the TMF! Helps me in so many ways today, and for that I am deeply grateful. There's a song by The Elders called 'Dear God', and one of the lyrics goes 'Three Minutes of Heaven, and then she'll be gone'

https://www.eldersmusic.com/track/590971/dear-god

Your story reminded me of this beautiful song.

Thank you again for sharing your beautiful writing talents with us all here. It is so appreciated!

Kindest regards,
John Smith, The Laughter Mechanic
 
It's already been said, but bares repeating, Captured Doll, you have both the amazing talent to risk much with your writing, and simply, to write beautifully and elegantly. Thank you for sharing this story here on the TMF! Helps me in so many ways today, and for that I am deeply grateful. There's a song by The Elders called 'Dear God', and one of the lyrics goes 'Three Minutes of Heaven, and then she'll be gone'

https://www.eldersmusic.com/track/590971/dear-god

Your story reminded me of this beautiful song.

Thank you again for sharing your beautiful writing talents with us all here. It is so appreciated!

Kindest regards,
John Smith, The Laughter Mechanic

Wow... I am so very, very touched. <3 Thank you John. :) What a wondeful post letter to receive. And what a beautiful and joyful song. Truly a gift back to me. I will replay this many times through out my life now. The fact that you thought of this in regards to my story makes me feel truly amazing inside. I wish I could give you a huge hug. But know I just did in my mind. :)

When I write... I think of what others should hear and see. What are the things people really want to talk about besides the exterior of sex in regards to Tickling. The things not being said publicly. I feel I have to use my own life and experiences to help show people they aren't alone. And can see simliar feelings or issues. Most times if I have a feeling or issue I think I should hide... I realize very quickly... those are the things I need to be posting. I venture to say a lot of poeple are hiding these feelings and issues. And that doesn't help anyone to grow within this fetish to become stronger.


I am completly vulnerable in doing so. Yes. But, being vulnerable is something I realized I must be here. Being open is meaningful to others. It certainly is to me. And the people like you who see me clearly for who I am and what I write about...and why... gives me the conviction to continue having the strength to do so. Its a give and take really. I lay bare my feelings, and experiences... And the responses become the gifts I never take for granted for doing these writings. A mirror of sorts, reflected back to me. So thoughtful, kind, and just as beautiful.

So thank you John. Your message really means a lot to me. :) *One more warm hug for you for the road* :)
 
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Thank you, Captured Doll, for your beautiful reply. &#55357;&#56911; A big hug right back to you! Thank you again for all you do! May you have many more wonderful experiences with your significant other like you shared with all of us! Have a great weekend, and enjoy that beautiful writing process you seem to have mastered :)

John, the Laughter Mechanic :)
 
The two ??s were from my iPhone and should have come through as two hands folded in prayer saying 'Thank you so much' lol. Sorry for the confusion.
 
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