I think the idea of Tantric Sex pisses me off

Ok, so I got in sort of an argument on another site with a proponent of Tantra (tantric sex) saying that in his practices, clittoral orgasm is considered the 'worst' kind of orgasm for a woman, and encouraging cervical orgasm, which everything I have read describes as painful and only enjoyable if you push past that. Meanwhile... in my own experience and the majority of women on this page... Clittoral orgasm is the most comparable to male ejaculation and gives an intense release. So the idea of directing focus away from that for couples who want to try tantric sex seems pretty much like just taking the most intense orgasm for a woman away.

But I read into tantric sex, and it also takes the man's ejaculation away. Tantric Sex is basically, have sex for hours with minimal movement, lest he get too aroused and cum, or she (but doubtful that the 'orgasm control/stopping ejaculation' is something women are taught rather than men.). Then after you've like, become one sexually aware mass of spiritual oneness or some junk like that, you and your partner get to cum... After hours of that. I would be dry as the Sahara and would probably rather do laundry for hours than try to cum after something that sounds so hokey, unfulfilling, and most of all, the complete opposite of what mentally and physically does it for me.

I guess part of Tantra is awakening the sexual energy in different parts of the body, parts not connected to genitals. Well... As a tickling fetishist, how does one even determine that the sexual energy in my other body parts is not already awakened? . If I can get super turned on being tickled on my feet or armpits or other traditionally nonsexual areas, then I am pretty aware of the touch response in my full body... But I won't likely have much excitement from snail-like caresses while staring in each other's eyes and breathing in unison... The whole idea just sounds so patently stupid to me.

Here's the thing... The internet at large seems to have almost nothing but praise for tantric sex, with people claiming the most intense, hours-long mental/physical/spiritual transcendent orgasms that can go on and on. Very few places seem to lay the bare truth out there.... That these "transcendent orgasms" for men are often the equivalent of extreme edging.... Denying himself ejaculation while getting close for a long time.... While the women's are often vaginal orgasms... Which are weaker and (I.m o .) not as satisfying, and also which are harder for many women to achieve at all!

The parallels between what happens with the male orgasm, and edging play, were fairly easy to see... Yet, this is like edging while taking away what makes edging hot in the first place. Most edging porn is somewhat similar to our kink, it's just the physical contact is usually sexual stimulation, to a point of closeness to orgasm, then taking it away just before, as a sort of form of torture by pleasure . Tantric, the orgasm is denied not cause it's mega hot to make him beg for it, but bc he's supposed to transcend the need for it and have some sort of spiritual mind/body orgasm with no ejaculation that builds for hours. Yeahh... Hokey. And not going to claim it couldn't happen... But my first instinct is to want to call bullshit on this

So everything I read in the positive about tantric sex, says that "good sex is about orgasm, great sex is about mind/body/spirit" or something to that effect. It essentially paints the idea that sex with orgasm in mind as the end goal is "shallow" and doesn't have any deeper mind, body and spirit connection at work. But while it can be shallow, there's no reason it has to be either. Tantric seems to forget that really sexy, orgasm-driven sexual activity often starts mentally, and with a great partner, has quite a bit of mental buildup going on through the day, leading up to it... And then the sex itself is usually intensely passionate but generally doesn't take long... But then, in a close relationship anyway, there's the spiritual growth and connection. Tantric forgets that after hot orgasm driven sex where you're unable to tear yourselves off each other, there's often this whole long period after of either snuggling, or smiling knowingly and joking with one another about the freaky hot stuff you just did, and it can just make both your days brighter and happier, because it's fun. Tantric sounds like work, quasi-religious hokey, and not fun. ... I want a guy to barely be able to control his lust with me, especially after tickling play, not a Zen pretention master who has transcended the need to tear my clothes off and hump me

If you like Tantra and it is enjoyable for you, I apologize if this offended you, I just don't understand the preference for it. Has anyone here ever tried it, and is my view of it similar to what you experienced, or am I completely missing something?

Was always interested in the idea, but never researched thoroughly or tried it myself. Hearing this though, I'm kinda not really interested as far as ignoring the clit goes like wtf lol

Yeah, it sounds like "Tantric Sex" is enjoyable only for the man and not at all for the woman. Not something I would try.

I am gonna uncharacteristically troll this thread:

New Age = . Stay clear, people.

My teachings come from The Kevin Sutra.

Sounds a bit time-consuming to me. Maybe I could be persuaded to give it a go if I were facing the TV set. Are crossword books allowed? lol

Idk, doesn't sound good to either to me. I think it'd be easier as the woman actually cuz once its in, even if I dry up, like its in. On the other hand, staying hard with just laying in there seems like a challenge. Also, not into being sweat on for that long, and I get gassy.

Urstruely said:

Idk, doesn't sound good to either to me. I think it'd be easier as the woman actually cuz once its in, even if I dry up, like its in. On the other hand, staying hard with just laying in there seems like a challenge. Also, not into being sweat on for that long, and I get gassy.

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Lol once it's in, it's in. Until it turns into a noodle lol

chicago said:

Lol once it's in, it's in. Until it turns into a noodle lol

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Tries really hard not to make a stupid joke: "Nghhhhhh!". Fails.

It sure gets really hot in there Now that's a new kind of pressure cooking

Thanks for the "noodle" image Chicago I'll have a thought for you when I cook some for my wife tonight

siamese dream said:

While the women's are often vaginal orgasms... Which are weaker and (I.m o .) not as satisfying...

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Trust me, some have cl!ts in the cervix and further. I'd say, it is not weak at all. No it's not... In fact for some, it is the great Atlantis.

chicago said:

Lol once it's in, it's in. Until it turns into a noodle lol

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Bwahahahahaha! It's the next hilarious post after the "Top that Mr.Fr..." Still can remember (vividly). One got noodled and pwned.

Oh I know that for some the g-spot/cervical orgasms are the best, sometimes the only kind they can have too... I'm not saying it wouldn't be awesome for some women. Just not for me ... And from what I have seen discussed about women and orgasm, it appears that the ability to have g-spot orgasms is not as common as clittoral orgasm, and women who can do both often describe the clittoral orgasm as stronger. But I know there are definitely exceptions to this and everyone is different.

To each their own, right? Sounds like Tantra is less about the carnal pleasure of sex, and more about using something everyone likes to help get to a higher state of consciousness. So I'd say sex is the vehicle, but not the destination. Not having done it myself, though, I can't say for sure.