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Tickling a must in a relationship?

Ita24

TMF Regular
Joined
Oct 10, 2017
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The only girl I ever dated was big time into tickling. Not being tied down and stuff like that. More stuff like wrestling would turn into tickle fights and we'd play games where one of us has to lay down and the other one can try to make them move by tickling them. It would also be incorporated into making out and what not. We would tease each other with it and also it was a great way to get physically closer. It was always so enjoyable. In an overall flawed relationship, it was one of the best parts of it.

I'd like my next relationship to be with someone who also enjoys tickling like that. I'm not hardcore like a lot of the people in here. Not big on bondage, humiliation, torture etc. I like it to be light hearted. I'm sure if I found someone great I could get past the fact they aren't into it but it would be a struggle. Whenever I start talking to someone I may be interested in I'll try to weave the topic into the conversation once were more comfortable with each other. Like I may bring up weaknesses and mention that a big weakness of mine is how ticklish I am or something like that. Usually I'll know by their response. They'll either have an open ended response which leaves the door open to continuing the topic or they will immediately shut it down with something like "Omg I HATE being tickled! It's the worst thing ever." At that point I'll drop that subject because I'd never want to force it on someone.

What are your thoughts? How important is tickling in a relationship? How would you bring up the topic of tickling to someone you're interested in to get a feel for where they stand on it?
 
I bring it up early, in a confident non-chalant way avoiding the word fetish. If they're not into it, on to the next one.

Luckily, I have a great ler/bf so no need to worry about that now.

Best of luck
 
I bring it up early, in a confident non-chalant way avoiding the word fetish. If they're not into it, on to the next one.

Luckily, I have a great ler/bf so no need to worry about that now.

Best of luck

I hope it lasts for you guys. If not... :facepalm: It's back to square one!
 
I agree XD I use too find out by bringing it up in ask a silly question game :p

But with my gf she was never into tickling at first in fact she hated been tickled (cuz she was not a very touchie touchie person) but thankfully she had an open mind and once she was confident around me and trusted me plus she came to understand how tickling was a part of me aswell. She gave it a tried and now.. She loves it XD and in fact it even surprised her how much she has grown too enjoy it. So we never looked back since.

It just goes too show how the perspective of tickling can change if someone has an open minded :)
 
Wish my wife was even slightly interested in tickling (as a ler or a lee). Been with her now for 38 years. Yeh, there's other things to consider with your mate.
 
I'll do the thing where after a certain level of familiarity has already happened, i.e. we've already dated and at least made out, I'll just tickle her in a light moment where I'm verbally "getting her back" after she said something to make fun of me. So it's introduced very harmlessly.

I think it would be bordering on self-sabotage to roll out words like "fetish" and "bondage" right away. Basically because there are a lot of people who would be okay with more intense practices if they were introduced to them gradually, and after they'd already decided they liked you.
 
I would certainly express your wants and desires at the beginning. As time goes on, people do change. So you’ll have to decide what is more important if you’re faced with that situation. Tickling isn’t prevalent in my marriage anymore, the interest on her part just waned. But that’s not grounds for divorce. So I’ve accepted it. I love her way more than I love tickling.
 
It's not at all important to me. There are more important things I value in a relationship and a woman than tickling. Companionship, love, affection, trust, etc ..

About the one thing that I would somewhat consider a deal breaker is if she never wants to have sex.
 
What if I told you...


You can find someone to love and trust WITHOUT settling for a dissatisfying kink life?

JS
 
About the one thing that I would somewhat consider a deal breaker is if she never wants to have sex.

But it won't be nearly as satisfying if you can't indulge you kinky side when you do so.

For me, I'm not expecting them to let me indulge my fetish 24/7, but I feel that romantic relationships have to be "give and take" on certain matters, which means that I should be able to indulge in my fetish with my romantic partner reasonably, because I'm sure in life there's going to be something she expects me to do (inside or outside of the bedroom) that I may not share the same passion she does for.
 
Tickling was very much a must for me. I only ever dated people off of here and FetLife. My now husband/Dom I met at a local play party and he was on FetLife. It wasn't easy and I had wade through a lot of B.S., but I eventually found the person of my dreams and you can too! Best advice I can give is stop having a defeatist attitude and never give up.
 
Huge must for me now. Wasn't as much when I got married (young lol) now it has but my SO is not really into it so I'm pretty much sol lol not really sure what to do but continue on.
 
I hope it will be a big part of future relationships for me. I don't really think it is a deal-breaker if it isn't... I was married a long time to someone who knew about my fetish but only indulged it a little during the first couple years of our relationship, and not at all later... But for a while, I was still happy, and still had an enjoyable sex life; I did miss it but there were other sexually satisfying things he did for me, so I was ok with that and just enjoyed my own private fantasies but didn't feel any huge need to enact those fantasies in real life. The reasons for my marriage ending had nothing to do with my tickling fetish but more like the way I was being treated :(. However now that I am single & free to do as I want, I definitely find it a big plus if the person I am with either loves tickling as much as me, or at least is willing to give it a chance ;)
 
Its a must for me but echoing the sentiments of other girls here, you do have to wade through some BS too i.e just because someone shares the fetish it doesn't mean they will enjoy the same sort of tickling as you, or even be good at tickling. My other half and I do it a lot, through tickle fights that leads to make out sessions, tied up sessions, and its a way of showing affection, he doesn't have the fetish but loves to do it because it makes me happy, and he loves to see how I react. Its wonderful to find the one I love, and not have to compromise what I enjoy. Its an added bonus.
 
I mean, as long as they're happy to indulge my fetish or if they cannot stand it, allow me to indulge with other people, I'm fine.

I of course extend that same courtesy to whomever I'm dating as well. For me, it's important enough to be a dealbreaker but for others, probably not. Actually sharing the fetish with me is a plus!
 
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