CapturedDoll
Verified
- Joined
- Jul 27, 2014
- Messages
- 4,923
- Points
- 48
I think at this point, we as women have to understand that… there are people who just won’t take no for an answer. It doesn’t matter how many times we repeat ourselves. Some people are just not going to conduct themselves, at the very least, in accordance with the rules. Chicago stated multiple times here that this was at least in part funny to her. And part serious. This thread really should have died by now. But 9 pages and over 6,000 views later… here we are. Why? I think a lot of people view the regulars as characters on the tickle equivalent of a soap opera.
Early on when I started posting regularly, I saw a man state that the only reason he ever came in to the chat was to watch drama unfold. He REALLY enjoyed that. Still does I’m sure. I think it could be said that the reason some guys keep doing things like this is because they know it bothers us. Not all certainly. There are wonderful people who go into the chat room. But, there’s also a segment whose sole intent is for drama. Or to make women uncomfortable. Or whatever reasons they have.
There’s a site I started going to last year. And it’s for women only. (mostly.) Sex Workers in every single part of the Industry talking about their experiences. And to help each other out with advice as per whichever job they have. (If any women would like the link, just write me at my inbox.) A lot us know already what is going on in these jobs. But OH there is so much more going on. I’m woke now, so to speak. lol
You don’t understand harassment until you’ve seen it through their eyes. (Even I didn’t. I knew a lot but… holy f!) Which has made me realize our problems are small in comparison. And so, I’ve just had to rethink how I use the chat room.
To be fair to men here. Yes I understand that this IS a sexual fetish site. And yes I do understand people ask mostly the same questions. I have multiple accounts dedicated to Tickling. So I had to stop being occasionally irritated at something that can’t really be helped. But… If this was the only issue… maybe we wouldn't be so standoffish sometimes. Or start threads like this. Like I have also. (Man...I was PISSED that day!) But this goes beyond just asking questions. We get harrassed. Repeatedly. Trolls, Catfish, and outright assholes ruin what should be a fun time. They don’t ruin it all the time. Just sometimes. And it has helped me keep my sanity by doing things that alleviate the issues.
What I have had to do is limit my time in the chat room altogether. And before I go in, I look at the names of who’s in there. If I see people who have harassed me… I don't go in. (And that’s usually if it’s multiple people who have harassed me. One or 2 I feel I can deal with. Depends on the user(s).) If I see mostly names I don’t recognize… I don’t go in. (I have no choice but to assume there are trolls or catfish sitting in there under new names.) If I see people who I KNOW are going to pm me like they have multiple times -every single time I go in there- (After 4 years of this, mind you.) I don’t go in. And when I DO go in… I don’t go in for long usually anymore. I also had to learn to ignore pm’s altogether. Sometimes i’ll answer one but if I do that… usually I can count on the pm being a ruse for any number of reasons the person may have. So I can’t do it anymore.
Boundaries are a myth for a lot of people. There are none as far as some are concerned. If they can’t be bothered to adhere to the rules here, or probably ANYWHERE in life… Idk why we keep expecting them to adhere to our boundaries. It's not going to happen. (It took me until just a couple months ago to realize this.) So unfortunately, we women, are the ones who have to adjust how we use the chat room. There really is no way around it that I can see. Except to screenshot the really nasty pm’s we receive and send them to Jeff or Myriads.
Early on when I started posting regularly, I saw a man state that the only reason he ever came in to the chat was to watch drama unfold. He REALLY enjoyed that. Still does I’m sure. I think it could be said that the reason some guys keep doing things like this is because they know it bothers us. Not all certainly. There are wonderful people who go into the chat room. But, there’s also a segment whose sole intent is for drama. Or to make women uncomfortable. Or whatever reasons they have.
There’s a site I started going to last year. And it’s for women only. (mostly.) Sex Workers in every single part of the Industry talking about their experiences. And to help each other out with advice as per whichever job they have. (If any women would like the link, just write me at my inbox.) A lot us know already what is going on in these jobs. But OH there is so much more going on. I’m woke now, so to speak. lol
You don’t understand harassment until you’ve seen it through their eyes. (Even I didn’t. I knew a lot but… holy f!) Which has made me realize our problems are small in comparison. And so, I’ve just had to rethink how I use the chat room.
To be fair to men here. Yes I understand that this IS a sexual fetish site. And yes I do understand people ask mostly the same questions. I have multiple accounts dedicated to Tickling. So I had to stop being occasionally irritated at something that can’t really be helped. But… If this was the only issue… maybe we wouldn't be so standoffish sometimes. Or start threads like this. Like I have also. (Man...I was PISSED that day!) But this goes beyond just asking questions. We get harrassed. Repeatedly. Trolls, Catfish, and outright assholes ruin what should be a fun time. They don’t ruin it all the time. Just sometimes. And it has helped me keep my sanity by doing things that alleviate the issues.
What I have had to do is limit my time in the chat room altogether. And before I go in, I look at the names of who’s in there. If I see people who have harassed me… I don't go in. (And that’s usually if it’s multiple people who have harassed me. One or 2 I feel I can deal with. Depends on the user(s).) If I see mostly names I don’t recognize… I don’t go in. (I have no choice but to assume there are trolls or catfish sitting in there under new names.) If I see people who I KNOW are going to pm me like they have multiple times -every single time I go in there- (After 4 years of this, mind you.) I don’t go in. And when I DO go in… I don’t go in for long usually anymore. I also had to learn to ignore pm’s altogether. Sometimes i’ll answer one but if I do that… usually I can count on the pm being a ruse for any number of reasons the person may have. So I can’t do it anymore.
Boundaries are a myth for a lot of people. There are none as far as some are concerned. If they can’t be bothered to adhere to the rules here, or probably ANYWHERE in life… Idk why we keep expecting them to adhere to our boundaries. It's not going to happen. (It took me until just a couple months ago to realize this.) So unfortunately, we women, are the ones who have to adjust how we use the chat room. There really is no way around it that I can see. Except to screenshot the really nasty pm’s we receive and send them to Jeff or Myriads.
