If you're still lurking Tampatklr, I don't if you have; but you might want to attend a NEST, i been on this site since 2001 under different names. As a lurker, being an activate member, then lurking again. One thing I have learnt is women are very curious when it comes to males they don't know. They tend to lean on word of month from other female members. By attending a NEST, munch, gathering (if they still have any) once or twice, you can get your name out there.
The most popular females lees runs in a small group and only play with lers they know of. Not too many pay session can be found on this site. You might also want to try Fetlife.com and join a couple of S&M groups.