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Being bipolar and have a foot fetish

hotchytick

TMF Expert
Joined
Sep 2, 2002
Messages
393
Points
16
I am bipolar. You don't know me, so I don't worry about your judgement. But being this way, I also have stronger emotions that most. I don't know why I like tickling women's feet so much, but when I do, my emotions are so strong I can't stop thinking about the scenario for years. Being bipolar means ups and downs that just come and go with out your control and not necessarily related to anything that is happening at that moment. It's a bitch because you can be walking down the street and depression hits you out of nowhere. Bipolar people have a lot of other complicated symptoms like obsessive compulsive disorder. I have OCD and it is challenging. When I was younger all I could think when I saw girls I liked was tickling their feet. It was bad, because I ONLY wanted this. Not sex or intimacy . When I got the opportunity to tickle a girls feet, my emotions would be so strong, that I would shake and my heart would pound out of my chest. I had memories racing through my head over and over again. I had a hard time having normal relationships with women, because despite the fact that they wanted to have sex, I was addicted to their feet. At 16 no less. My thoughts were often erratic and fixat on one thing. Depression was always there. I take lithium and an assortment of other medications that I will be on for the rest of my life. I am well in control now, but i don't wish this disease on my worst enemy. Please understand that bipolar humans are suffering. Many people are very smart. If fact, some of the greatest historical figures where bipolar, such as Winston Churchhill, Van Gogh, Earnest Hemminghway and many, many more. I don't know if my fetish is related to my situation, but that part of my sexuality is what it is. I may be warped, but it is who I am. I love women, I love my girlfriend, but I suffer a lot. Please take the time to understand people who suffer with bipolar disorder.
 
My belief in life is.

"Dont judge other people unless you are standing in their shoes"

Your being bipolar and fixating on women's feet, is your business, and really not anyone else's business to judge.

In regard to you mentioning about having a "hard time having normal relationships with women".

I honestly think that, as the case with any fetish, difficulties in relationships can occur just due to the fetish itself.

I dont know if you've ever read any of my posts.

I have Epilepsy, and the doctors also think I have at least mild ADD.

I take medication for the seizures, although sometimes I still get them.

A couple of geniuses in my life, who know I have ADD are like.

"You don't listen to what I say"

Er.. that's not intentional.

I have a medical condition, that sometimes causes my mind to wander, especially if I;m bored, upset, or my mind is on something else.

I wish you well with managing your medical condition.

I hope one day that you meet someone, who will understand you as a person, and also about your fetish.

Best wishes,
Mitch
 
Thank You for sharing, we all carry our own luggage, but by sharing we can lighten the load. Someday maybe I'll be strong enough to share mine with you...
 
I'm not bipolar (I do have clinical depression), but a lot of this resonates. I was obsessed with tickling when I was younger (still am, obviously, but it's different now). I wanted to tickle pretty much everyone I knew or saw, or at least watch them be tickled. I'd daydream about it, mentally insert tickle scenes into books or movies, etc. If I saw a someone get tickled, in real life or on TV, I'd replay that scene in my mind for ages. And I developed an interest in seeing people barefoot because I associated feet with tickling. If I saw a bare foot, I wanted to tickle it.

Puberty changed my obsession in several ways. It became sexual, so my interests in who I wanted to tickle or whose feet I wanted to see narrowed to people I generally found sexually attractive (which, being bisexual, was/is still a lot of people). Strangely enough, I found that having these obsessions become sexualized helped me deal with them. It gave me a context to them that I didn't have before ("what the fuck is wrong with me?" became "oh, I have a fetish. People have those"). And the intrusive thoughts and such became more bearable somehow when they were now mixed with other, "normal" intrusive sexual thoughts. And as I got older and my hormones calmed down, it got better and easier to live with. I still think about tickling on an almost daily basis and have a very active fantasy life, but it all seems... I don't know how to phrase it. Less urgent, somehow.

So, anyway, good of you to open up like this. Awareness of mental health issues in all walks of life, including the kink world, is a good and necessary thing.
 
This thread really got me because it sooo applies to my own story :( Not bipolar but Aspergers and OCD. You really did the right thing, accepting that some of the things are a part of you and intertwined with your sexuality. I feel the same. I also have a hard time with potential partners and I've been single for my entire life until now. I am obsessed with feet and and it kinda interrupts intimate relationships with potential girlfriends. If I find a girl attractive I always start thinking about how her feet look and if they are ticklish! My heart starts racing!! Gosh I hate going to the beach with all the beautiful girls and their exposed soles :O I too have no interest in "sex" but only tickling. But I believe I learned how to make it work anyway!

Thanks for sharing your story!:bubbleheart: I really hope you will find your way and utilize all the things you have learned up til now. I wish you the best!!:bubbleheart:
 
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