Hey yall. Hope you all have a happy Christmas. 2020 has been a challenging year for us all that's for sure. I know that with vaccines coming hopefully 2021 will be looking up. For me down the line hopefully I can try dating. but honestly there is still some intimidation, lack of confidence and apprehensiveness around that.
I was very socially awkward up until the last couple of years(Asperger's Syndrome is a bitch). So I've had few friends and no dates/relationships. I tried a cold approach like 2 times in the past but while nothing bad happened it also wasn't fruitful, and [girls don't seem to like it.](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskWomen/comments/jtbsdp/what_are_automatic_turn_offs_when_being/) Plus there is all this different advice down out there like on this [Youtube channel](https://www.youtube.com/c/SkillofAttraction/videos)
What makes it more confusing is hearing stories like [these](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/..._how_did_you_meet_your_girlfriend/?limit=1500) where getting into a relationship isn't a big deal. I still have some nervous feelings with social interactions, and generally this makes me feel anxious about having a relationship because there's advice with these do's and don'ts(which I get the basic ones and such) but then there's people who are casual with their partner, and I guess past insecurities from previous social failures factor in.
I guess what I'm trying to say is, my mind keeps making up scenarios where things go wrong or painting things as if everyone else is doing just fine relationship wise or it's so easy. I mean, I did recall after graduating high school that many of my classmates were in relationships. And I mean I have been wrestling with holding myself to the idealized life script(stable two parent home, first kiss/date in your teens, childhood friends etc) which I already don't follow(nerdy black guy, autism, dysfunctional family) and it's part of why I feel inadequate. The pandemic has slowed my plans sure but I still don't really have friends save for maybe one, can't do much hobby wise and of course am still single at 20. It's not like I want a girlfriend as the only sense of happiness but I it'd be nice to have the emotional/physical intimacy.
What do I do?
I was very socially awkward up until the last couple of years(Asperger's Syndrome is a bitch). So I've had few friends and no dates/relationships. I tried a cold approach like 2 times in the past but while nothing bad happened it also wasn't fruitful, and [girls don't seem to like it.](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskWomen/comments/jtbsdp/what_are_automatic_turn_offs_when_being/) Plus there is all this different advice down out there like on this [Youtube channel](https://www.youtube.com/c/SkillofAttraction/videos)
What makes it more confusing is hearing stories like [these](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/..._how_did_you_meet_your_girlfriend/?limit=1500) where getting into a relationship isn't a big deal. I still have some nervous feelings with social interactions, and generally this makes me feel anxious about having a relationship because there's advice with these do's and don'ts(which I get the basic ones and such) but then there's people who are casual with their partner, and I guess past insecurities from previous social failures factor in.
I guess what I'm trying to say is, my mind keeps making up scenarios where things go wrong or painting things as if everyone else is doing just fine relationship wise or it's so easy. I mean, I did recall after graduating high school that many of my classmates were in relationships. And I mean I have been wrestling with holding myself to the idealized life script(stable two parent home, first kiss/date in your teens, childhood friends etc) which I already don't follow(nerdy black guy, autism, dysfunctional family) and it's part of why I feel inadequate. The pandemic has slowed my plans sure but I still don't really have friends save for maybe one, can't do much hobby wise and of course am still single at 20. It's not like I want a girlfriend as the only sense of happiness but I it'd be nice to have the emotional/physical intimacy.
What do I do?