JamesBondage86
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Just curious about it.
And if so, how did it change your life?
And if so, how did it change your life?
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Did You “Come Out” As Tickle-Enthusiasts?
- Thread starter JamesBondage86
- Start date
Haven’t had any issues or embarrassment with being open to individuals yet. I’m not outed to everyone, just a select few women who I shared the fetish with.
brotherted
Verified
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- Sep 19, 2002
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There have been debates about this before, and I understand that some people disagree....
I've never found any value in advertising this kink to people who have no reason or need to know.
Maybe this is selfish on my part, because if it were more fully understood by the world, I think that would be a good thing for us.
And I was pretty dismayed at how the documentary Tickld treated it, when they did a segment on the consensual side of it -- the tone was mocking and shaming.
But I have more to lose than gain by having all my friends know about this. And it's not so much about my real friends -- who wouldn't care. It's more about the peripheral people who'd end up hearing about it; who don't really know me, and wouldn't understand. It could produce a barrier to being taken seriously in those settings, which is a problem we can all easily avoid with a little privacy.
It's a little like a girl who loves some kind of strange dildos. She could tell everyone, sure. But there are probably more downsides to upsides for this kind of transparency.
I've never found any value in advertising this kink to people who have no reason or need to know.
Maybe this is selfish on my part, because if it were more fully understood by the world, I think that would be a good thing for us.
And I was pretty dismayed at how the documentary Tickld treated it, when they did a segment on the consensual side of it -- the tone was mocking and shaming.
But I have more to lose than gain by having all my friends know about this. And it's not so much about my real friends -- who wouldn't care. It's more about the peripheral people who'd end up hearing about it; who don't really know me, and wouldn't understand. It could produce a barrier to being taken seriously in those settings, which is a problem we can all easily avoid with a little privacy.
It's a little like a girl who loves some kind of strange dildos. She could tell everyone, sure. But there are probably more downsides to upsides for this kind of transparency.
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Like to the world? No of course not why would they need to know? Tickling is a kink, not an identity or sexuality. I see it like telling people you're into spanking or getting choked. Nothing wrong with liking it obviously you shouldn't repress it, but the only people who need to know are people you wish to spank/choke you. Your mom doesn't need to know about that. I have told romantic/sexual partners if I trust them enough or I get the vibe that they'd be into it. Not friends or family though.
I think "coming out" is the wrong word. There's nothing to come out about it's a kink.
I think "coming out" is the wrong word. There's nothing to come out about it's a kink.
AdamSterling
TMF Expert
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- Apr 22, 2001
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I agree with everyone who has commented on this thread so far. Being a tickler is a PART of me... it's not ALL of me. It's not appropriate to tell family or (vanilla) friends -- many of them wouldn't know what to do with that kind of information, and some of them might react negatively... and I am completely uninterested in taking that chance. There is much to be said for privacy and discretion on this topic.
I am "out" about my kinks only on the appropriate places online -- here on TMF, on FetLife, and a handful of other websites.
I am "out" about my kinks only on the appropriate places online -- here on TMF, on FetLife, and a handful of other websites.
Comfort Eagle
Level of Cherry Feather
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- Apr 21, 2003
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- 10,217
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I've only ever talked about it to people who I intend to bring into it to some extent. I've never understood why people would ever tell family members.
It 's gone fine. Though one lady in particular needs me to explain "But what is it though?!" over and over again despite having actually seen video of material I've actually shot. Most everyone else responds with anywhere from vague-interest to complete apathy.
It 's gone fine. Though one lady in particular needs me to explain "But what is it though?!" over and over again despite having actually seen video of material I've actually shot. Most everyone else responds with anywhere from vague-interest to complete apathy.
So I have some friends who were discussing their kinks one night and they were pressing me because I kept saying I really don't think I have one. I beat around the bush and played along to them trying to figure out what it might be for me so they asked me what kind of things I'm into and I said I love it when a woman is happy/laughing and I like touch. The one guy said "You know what you might like, tickling." I was just like "Maybe so!" And that was it.
In my younger days, I never really talked about it to anyone. I just acted on it. The girls that liked me would more or less accept it and not get mad if I tickled them. The ones that didn't like being tickled I would end up leaving them in the dust. But the fun ones were the ones who wanted to be with me and would do anything for me, especially when they saw how it affected me (if you know what I mean). Girls can be just like guys as far as going for what they want, even if it means being tickled half to death! 
Just as with a number of other fetishes, there's a different dynamic when coming out with a fetish involving same-sex attraction. I am out with it and am very comfortable discussing it and have actually done so a number of times.
One of the keys is to be ready and informed. An excellent book to start with is "Perv," which makes the well-grounded case that everyone has a fetish. With that base argument, it's easier to talk with others concerning tickling (or most other fetishes).
I disagree with the idea that "Tickled" made the community look bad. The filmmakers were in great contact with the m/m tickling community regarding the film. I went to several screenings and talked with audience members about the film afterward. No one I spoke with and no one, save for a few posters here and another board, had negative experiences regarding the movie. The filmmakers were very clear about the intent of the film, who was the perpetrator and who were the victims.
I've also posted many times here about many men, and especially straight-identified men, who have a genuine urge for m/m tickling and fear being open about it. I still get contacted by men who feel they can't tell anyone.
Thus, a couple of years ago, when I was asked if I would give my thoughts and tell my experiences regarding men's feet and tickling for a podcast, I agreed. You can find that interview located here:
https://lnns.co/Kw1P6ln2ke0
It's now been almost 2 years since I've given that interview and I still get messages from men thanking me. So, how has it changed my life? It's made me pleased that I might have helped other men's lives.
One of the keys is to be ready and informed. An excellent book to start with is "Perv," which makes the well-grounded case that everyone has a fetish. With that base argument, it's easier to talk with others concerning tickling (or most other fetishes).
I disagree with the idea that "Tickled" made the community look bad. The filmmakers were in great contact with the m/m tickling community regarding the film. I went to several screenings and talked with audience members about the film afterward. No one I spoke with and no one, save for a few posters here and another board, had negative experiences regarding the movie. The filmmakers were very clear about the intent of the film, who was the perpetrator and who were the victims.
I've also posted many times here about many men, and especially straight-identified men, who have a genuine urge for m/m tickling and fear being open about it. I still get contacted by men who feel they can't tell anyone.
Thus, a couple of years ago, when I was asked if I would give my thoughts and tell my experiences regarding men's feet and tickling for a podcast, I agreed. You can find that interview located here:
https://lnns.co/Kw1P6ln2ke0
It's now been almost 2 years since I've given that interview and I still get messages from men thanking me. So, how has it changed my life? It's made me pleased that I might have helped other men's lives.
Tickleclown13
TMF Novice
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Ive only come out with it to my ex wife (almost dumped me because of it hence EX), a girl i was talking too (she was a sub), and my fiance. 2 out of three accepted and didnt judge me like my ex, and the first girl who i told after my divorce said never to kink shame, and that helped me be more confident with it. my Finace's reaction when i told her was "really? thats it?". That comment alone from her made my damn day because my ex treated me like i was a monster for having a fetish and she despised it. other than that i keep my privacy and never tell anyone even my friends dont know, and i like to keep it that way. I loved Tickle Theater back when i first found out about them was because i was in a community that shared something in common, and was a little support group in a way getting to understand things especially when i was 18 and a virgin.
While all my exes and a few of my friends know about my foot fetish I've only ever came out to two people about my tickle fetish, my wife and and one ex(although I'm sure a couple of my exes suspected I was into tickling). My wife isn't bothered about it in the slightest. My ex though was fascinated by it. She always asked lots of questions about it, which was really good as it was questions I never considered myself, I found it really cathartic to discuss my tickle fetish in depth with someone, especially after so many years of keeping it to myself. There was no judging just genuine interest on her part which made me feel much more comfortable about discussing it with her. Also she was off the scale ticklish as well and enjoyed it, she was surprised when I told her not everyone likes being tickled, she just assumed everyone did. But she allowed me to explore things with her and she really got into it, I was very lucky to have such a positive experience like that.
Its something I'd never want my family to know about though. I'm slightly more open about my foot fetish as Its a common fetish and easy to explain, but I'd never want to shout about my fetishes from the rooftops, its a personal thing for me.
Its something I'd never want my family to know about though. I'm slightly more open about my foot fetish as Its a common fetish and easy to explain, but I'd never want to shout about my fetishes from the rooftops, its a personal thing for me.
I didn't come out as a "Tickle-Enthusiast" (tickling isn't an interest to me like music or movies)...I simply came out to a lady I was having a fling with back in the mid 90's as "i have this strange fetish, and this is what gets me off" more or less.
She was very supportive of it, fulfilled it to the max (possibly the hottest tickle experience I ever had to date...a real trooper taking the torture for my pleasure) and she told me something that changed my life moving forward from that point on. And that was to more or less to be proud of who I am, what I like, what I do in everything, not just sexually, and if someone can't accept it then I don't need them in my life.
Change for no one was the moral of the story here...and I can not stress how right she was! I owe a lot to her as to the person i've been the last 25 years or so. It changed my life for the better. And to think, it was all because of coming out to this odd fetish that gets me off lol.
Ever since then, i've come out to anyone that i'm close to getting into something with. And if they didn't accept it, then I knew we were not sexually compatible and I either just remained friends with them and not went any further than that, or just simply cut ties with them all together if we didn't have anything in common to remain "pals".
She was very supportive of it, fulfilled it to the max (possibly the hottest tickle experience I ever had to date...a real trooper taking the torture for my pleasure) and she told me something that changed my life moving forward from that point on. And that was to more or less to be proud of who I am, what I like, what I do in everything, not just sexually, and if someone can't accept it then I don't need them in my life.
Change for no one was the moral of the story here...and I can not stress how right she was! I owe a lot to her as to the person i've been the last 25 years or so. It changed my life for the better. And to think, it was all because of coming out to this odd fetish that gets me off lol.
Ever since then, i've come out to anyone that i'm close to getting into something with. And if they didn't accept it, then I knew we were not sexually compatible and I either just remained friends with them and not went any further than that, or just simply cut ties with them all together if we didn't have anything in common to remain "pals".
I've "come-out" to several women in my life. My "thing" is half nylons, half tickling. Either one is great, but put them both together...
It started out with my first wife, kind of by accident/serendipity. She noticed that I got aroused when we would "tickle fight", and she at first thought it was because I was being tickled. I had to tell her, no, tickling you turns me on. She was cool with it, but she was such a control freak that we only ever did it on her terms.
I came out to three other women I was dating. One was very into it, although she wasn't that ticklish. But she enjoyed making up stories about her friends and sisters for me. The other two were cool with it, but didn't play into it. In the end, that may have killed our relationship, because it pissed me off that they wouldn't play into it, just a little bit. I shared with them, probably more than once, that nylons turned me ON. But still, I almost never saw them wear them. (ARGH!)
My current wife...is totally into it. Her nylons/stockings drawer is FULL. She is not overly ticklish...just enough (and 'just enough' might actually be the perfect level, but that's a discussion for another time). But we wouldn't have this if I hadn't shared my interests with her.
I've never had a truly bad experience in "coming out". I didn't do it right away, I made sure the timing was right, and I only did it with women who I was already in a fairly solid relationship with.
Hope that helps a bit...
It started out with my first wife, kind of by accident/serendipity. She noticed that I got aroused when we would "tickle fight", and she at first thought it was because I was being tickled. I had to tell her, no, tickling you turns me on. She was cool with it, but she was such a control freak that we only ever did it on her terms.
I came out to three other women I was dating. One was very into it, although she wasn't that ticklish. But she enjoyed making up stories about her friends and sisters for me. The other two were cool with it, but didn't play into it. In the end, that may have killed our relationship, because it pissed me off that they wouldn't play into it, just a little bit. I shared with them, probably more than once, that nylons turned me ON. But still, I almost never saw them wear them. (ARGH!)
My current wife...is totally into it. Her nylons/stockings drawer is FULL. She is not overly ticklish...just enough (and 'just enough' might actually be the perfect level, but that's a discussion for another time). But we wouldn't have this if I hadn't shared my interests with her.
I've never had a truly bad experience in "coming out". I didn't do it right away, I made sure the timing was right, and I only did it with women who I was already in a fairly solid relationship with.
Hope that helps a bit...
I’ve confided to a few of my closest female friends about my nylon feet fetish, which in turn lead to me talking about my tickling fetish. This actually turned out well for me, as they were all curious about it and indulged me. It’s not exactly something I’d shout from the rooftops, though - I like having some things remaining a secret.
Cheers, everybody,
SmashTV
Cheers, everybody,
SmashTV
I'm also a believer in that sharing your kinks shouldn't be a requirement, unless it's with a partner/potential one (be it romantic partner, playmate who doesn't know, etc.). In that case, you'll want to bring it up eventually. That way, you'll know whether or not you're sexually compatible with someone.
I've never brought up my tickle kink to anyone outside of fetish websites and I hope to keep it that way.
I've never brought up my tickle kink to anyone outside of fetish websites and I hope to keep it that way.
