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A Smart Man

JoBelle

3rd Level Orange Feather
Joined
Aug 31, 2001
Messages
2,586
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I always thought this one was funny! :D

I was riding to work yesterday when I observed a female driver cut right in front of a pickup truck causing him to have to drive on to the shoulder to avoid hitting her. This evidently angered the driver enough that he hung his arm out his window and flipped the woman off. "Man, that guy is stupid" I thought to myself.

I ALWAYS smile nicely and wave in a sheepish manner whenever a female
does anything to me in traffic and here's why: I drive 48 miles each way every day to work, that's 96 miles each day. Of these, 16 miles each way is bumper-to-bumper. Most of the bumper-to-bumper is on an 8 lane highway so if you just look at the 7 lanes I am not in, that means I pass something like a new car every 40 feet per lane.

That's 7 cars every 40 feet for 32 miles. That works out to be 982 cars every mile, or 31,424 cars. Even though the rest of the 32 miles is not bumper to bumper, I figure I pass at least another 4000 cars. That brings the number to something like 36,000 cars I pass every day.

Statistically, half of these are driven by females, that's 18,000. In
any given group of females, 1 in 28 has PMS.That's 642. According to
Cosmopolitan, 70% describe their love life as dissatisfying or
unrewarding. That's 449. According to the National Institute of Health, 22% of all females have seriously considered suicide or homicide. That's 98. And 34% describe men as their biggest problem. That's 33. According to the National Rifle Association 5% of all females carry weapons and this number is increasing.

That means that EVERY SINGLE DAY I drive past at least one female that has...

a lousy love life, thinks men are her biggest problem, has seriously
considered suicide or homicide, has PMS, and is ARMED!

FLIP ONE OFF???
I THINK NOT!!!
 
Speaking of PMS, many times when I'm cranky...kind of like the little man at the end of this message...my wife accuses me of having SRS...Sperm Retention Syndrome.
 
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