Snail Shell
Verified
- Joined
- Jun 24, 2001
- Messages
- 7,878
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To: All Underworld Staff
Re: Employees of the Month
Greetings to all. As you are all aware, we here in The Underworld strive to make the lives of the mortals above us as miserable, horrifying and chaotic as we possibly can. Traditionally, the best way to accomplish this has been to keep you, our valued employees, also, as miserable as possible. Lately, however, this has caused a lack in productivity to some of our valued team members. Some of you have even resorted to using such horrible words around the office place as "morale", "worker's rights" and other such hogwash.
In an effort to appease this pithy little demands from you, our valued mindless, clock-punching horde, we have decided to implement an Employee of the Month system. Those of you who perform above and beyond will be rewarded as is befitting of your specific role in our company. Failure to be awarded Employee of the Month will be of course be punished with all the severity and humiliation of that F$@#ING raccoon who keeps getting into my garbage every other night.
Anyways, this month's Employees of the Month are Morrigan Aensland from the Darkstalkers video game series and Catherine from the game of the same name. If you see them in the hallways, congratulate them. Morrigan and Catherine, please report to room A113 for the physical pleasure of your choosing as a reward.
Thank you and may you continue to enjoy your menial little tasks. This IS The Underworld after all.
With Regards,
The Management.
Re: Employees of the Month
Greetings to all. As you are all aware, we here in The Underworld strive to make the lives of the mortals above us as miserable, horrifying and chaotic as we possibly can. Traditionally, the best way to accomplish this has been to keep you, our valued employees, also, as miserable as possible. Lately, however, this has caused a lack in productivity to some of our valued team members. Some of you have even resorted to using such horrible words around the office place as "morale", "worker's rights" and other such hogwash.
In an effort to appease this pithy little demands from you, our valued mindless, clock-punching horde, we have decided to implement an Employee of the Month system. Those of you who perform above and beyond will be rewarded as is befitting of your specific role in our company. Failure to be awarded Employee of the Month will be of course be punished with all the severity and humiliation of that F$@#ING raccoon who keeps getting into my garbage every other night.
Anyways, this month's Employees of the Month are Morrigan Aensland from the Darkstalkers video game series and Catherine from the game of the same name. If you see them in the hallways, congratulate them. Morrigan and Catherine, please report to room A113 for the physical pleasure of your choosing as a reward.
Thank you and may you continue to enjoy your menial little tasks. This IS The Underworld after all.
With Regards,
The Management.
