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dating a girl who hates being tickled

C

cmm21241

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Aug 23, 2003
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So here this issue. Anyone ever date someone who hates being tickled and gets turned off while having sex. I've been seeing this girl and thats exactly what happened. We're both thinking it's not going to work out. But I really like this girl. Is it worth pursuing? Anyone ever have this problem?
 
I have had this happen it but not to the point where we were going to break up over it. My ex did not like it when I would ask her to do that for me during sex but because she loved me she would do it anyway. I supposed the real trick is not to force her to do it and work it in slowly. A light tickle here and there followed by a deep hug [not during sex] so she can assosiate the feelings with the love you have for her. It may still not work depending on how much she dislikes the tickle feeling.

I imagine the real question to ask yourself is whether or not the main reason you are with her is so you can tickle her during sex. If you really like her and can get by the fact she doesn't like it you can still be happy. Don't let her go over one or two small details, you will be sorry about it later. If you can make the relationship workout she may eventually want to explore things that make you happy during sex and you can bring it back up. I feel your best bet is to back off the tickling a little right now and try to work it in slow and easy to give her a chance to decide if she is going to do what makes the person in her life happy.

Best of fortune to you.
 
Sorry if this is me pushing too much "advice"

If the feelings are strong and mutual, difficulties can be overcome, and small matters such as wanting to tickle the (hypothetical) girlfriend senseless tend to disappear, for me at least.

There will always be arguments, dissagrements and issues in relationships. So long as people are not expecting it to be argument free, it can work.

Sexual incompatibilities can be overcome, worked around etc. But, if there is a lack of emotional connection during sex, then there can be a real problem there.
 
ditch the b*tch of course!!!

ok, ok maybe "b*tch" was a lil harsh 🙂 but OBVIOUSLY she has serious issues that...well, maybe we do, but anyway, you'll have to weigh the other positives in the blooming relationship that...ok I can't type that with a straight face...just run while you still can! Best of luck seriously, it's not an easy issue to deal with.
 
Can you have a fulfilling sex life without tickling? If so, and you are connecting on all other levels besides the tickling, of course it is worth pursuing! Sex, especially a special preferrence during sex, is not the most important thing in the world! There is so much more about a relationship!
 
Do what the other topics here suggested...chloroform her or knock her out with a lead pipe and then tie her up. Then you can have sex and tickle as much as you want.
 
The hating being tickled: I've heard of this problem many times. The getting turned off while having sex, that to me seems like a serious problem.

Of course, the old saying of "What do you do the other 23 hours and 45 minutes of the day, even if you have a good sex life" is often true. That being said, it would seem very difficult to be with someone in a physical relationship, who gets completely turned off while having sex.

Suggestion: Talk to her about this, while fully clothed, and not getting ready for sex. Put all the issues on the table, and discuss techniques that might aid her in getting turned on. Try it, and see if it works. If it doesnt, after a time, then I hate to say you might have to consider moving on.

Good Luck. I hope you can settle this with her.

Mitch
 
cmm21241 said:
So here this issue. Anyone ever date someone who hates being tickled and gets turned off while having sex. I've been seeing this girl and thats exactly what happened. We're both thinking it's not going to work out. But I really like this girl. Is it worth pursuing? Anyone ever have this problem?
Click to expand...

This describes every girl from my life. If she doesn't like it/isn't into it, she never will be. Dump her now and move on. You'll both be happier in the long run.
 
i gotta say..is she strongly dislikes what is a part of who you are then i gotta think that in the long run its not going to work out so i would move on now before it gets more difficult.Sure you can TRY to stop ur tickling urges but thats just going to make you miserable and in the long run resent her.....Never compromise who you are!
 
First you need to think about how much tickling means for you. if it is a important part of your life, then you should move on and find a girl that you can play with as well. Before I opened up about my fetish I was with "vanilla girls" that I couldn't play with and it was frustrating as hell. Today I would never be together with a girl that wasn't into BDSM or didn't accept tickle play.

good luck 🙂
 
Like chewing and swallowing

It sounds as though tickling and sex are like chewing and swallowing for you,cmm21241. So if her refusal to allow the tickling is like refusing to kiss you, it sounds like a dead end.

However, if this woman is otherwise eager to please you, I'd suggest seeking out tickle action on the side, if you can live without your tickle action ending in sexual climax. Try a dominatrix who does tickling sessions as a submissive. Otherwise, there's always a chance of finding a platonic female tickle buddy here.
 
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Sorry to say, but having been in your boat for the last 5 years, DO NOT do it. Unless you are willing to give up what you hold dear for this young lady, then you are in for a long life missing what many might consider a part of who you are.

Just my 2 cents.

The Tickleshow
 
I still think it all depends on how much you guys like each other apart from the tickling and how important tickling is to you. If you don't need it to have sex and if she seems like the perfect partner otherwise, I wouldn't dump her!

Keep in mind that you might never find someone who is into tickling, and then maybe you passed on the person who was your true love!
 
My previous girlfriend was initially receptive to tickling but then grew to hate it. The gradual shift in her feelings about tickling made for some awkward moments in bed. Although that by itself wasn't a deal-breaker, it did create tension that, along with everything else, eventually caused us to split. Had she hated it from the beginning, I probably wouldn't have dated her in the first place (save us both the trouble). I'd say our relationship was more confusing than anything. If you know she hates it and if it's important to you, get the hell out of Dodge. If you can get by without, then by all means proceed as you wish.
 
I think the problem is most people not into the fetish of tickling associate it with something done by their parents, older relatives. something she doesnt want in her mind when shes having sex. what you can do, and i hope this works since i havent tried it myself, but its worth giving a go, is to talk to her nonchalantly about experiences shes had being tickled by friends, ex boyfriends even. people who are outside of her, "ew thats gross" zone(sorry im tired, ill try to think of a better name). then start using it as foreplay. you need to gently ease her into this, remember. i hate saying it like this, but on some level its the same thing as trying to get her to enjoy being peed on, except tickling isnt reprehensible to most people(unless shes the most ticklish girl on the planet, in which case DO WHAT YOU MUST) lol. and you cant get your finished product in one day, you gonna have to start with something like light tickles only giving her the chills down up and down her body with your fingers, dont start digging into her ribs and pits, thats not sensual. and sensual is key. just take it gradually and im sure you'll turn her into one of us by the end of the year. 🙂
 
Now don't get me wrong... I'll all about some tickling as foreplay... but I surely couldn't imagine tickling someone while having sex. I think that would turn ME off. 😛 They just don't seem like two things you would do together...
 
For me, so far, so good!

I met a girl a few weeks ago on a dating site. We've just begun sleeping together and am delighted to report that i have tickled her sides and feet a few times in sexual situations. Not only does she not object, but she moans when i stroke her feet and suck her toes. I'm not sure her feet are super ticklish, BUT they are definitely very, very sensitive.

Love the reaction. Her lower stomach is very ticklish though and she giggles, which is fun. What I really like is that the more i tickle her feet, the more excited she gets.

No, never discussed tickling with her, we're just doing it. Last night she tickle-scratched my sides and back as we fooled around, and yea, it felt awesome.

For me, tickling is essential.
 
If you feel that you will always be looking over your shoulder saying to yourself, what if the next girl or what if x years from now I meet that special girl that is all I wanted and is extremely ticklish and loves it or will endure it... what if what if what if.......if you are going to forever live asking what if.... therein lies your answer.
 
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