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Kurchlander (Part Three)

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*Ramirez has finished training Kurch in the ways of The Immortals. Kurch goes into town to shop and relax after all the ardous training as Ramirez stays at his home.*

*There is a knock at the door and Ramirez opens it. There he stands face to face with the evil Kurgan*

Ramirez: KURGAN!!! What brings you here!

The Kurgan: I am here to finish off that wimp Kurch.

Ramirez: Well you'll not find him here. He is doing some chity shopping

The Kurgan: Why would anyone be shopping for shit???????

Raimirez: He is not shopping for shit. He is chity shopping.

The Kurgan: Huh?

Ramirez: He is in the town shopping!!!

The Kurgan: Ahhhhhhhhhhhh where exactly is the Haggis Hatin Bastard then? Tell me and I might let you live.

Ramirez: I'll not be tlling anythin to the likes of you laddie.

The Kurgan: Then I suppose I should just off you then and collect your energy.

*The Kurgan kicks Ramirez in the nuts.*

Ramirez: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHG!!! Right in the pounderflockers!!!!!

*The Kurgan then quickly decapitates Ramirez and a swirling cloud of lightning ensues as The Kurgan collects Ramirez energy.*

*Kurch pauses in town at the instant of Ramirez's death.

Kurch: I sense a disturbance in the Force. No wait that is from Star Wars and its only the year 1518. Besides I dont wanna get sued by George Lucas. Let me try again. I sense a perturbtion in the natural life energy that is totally not Force related. I best head back home.*

*kurch quickly heads back home which takes about a day since its only 1518 and there really isnt any kind of mass transit system available but I digress. Kurch opens the door to his home to find the decaptied body of Ramirez. Ramirez's head is stuck on post in the middle of the house with a note *

Kurch: RAMIREZ!!!! NOoooooooooooooooooooo
I am so sorry my friend!!!!

*Kurch reads the note*

While you were out I killed your friend Ramirez who seems to have serious problems with pronouncing the word CITY. Anyway killing him seems to have cured this problem. No need to thank me. Also you might think about changing your name, Kurch and Kurgan are kinda close it could confuse the storyline. Just a thought. Till we meet again.

PS. You are low on milk.

your sworn enemy,
The Kurgan

Kurch: DAMN!!!! I forgot to get more milk. Oh yeah and DAMN!!! you Kurgan I will get you yet.

(When will the Kurgan and Kurch finally meet? Will he get more milk? When will the next Haggis joke appear? Stay tuned to the next blog entry to find out.)

Updated 04-01-2009 at 06:11 PM by kurchatovium

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    Very amusing. Keep it up.
    Glad to see part 3 my friend