I'm so happy to have stumbled on this post! I'm flattered. Retirement or not, I will always KNOW that my fan are the reason for my success.
I feel comfortable being open and honest with my dearest fans and I will let you all in on my story.
So to address the "porker" comments... my entire life and even through high school I've always had a thicker and very much so ATHLETIC build. When I started into fetish modelng I got into a car accident which resulted in needing reconstructive surgery in my wrist. I took this time as an opportunity to get "skinny" so that I could have more success in the biz. I couldnt work out as I was recovering so I went to a diet clinic and as a result I became very addicted to phetrimetrazine diet pills and stuck to a VERY restrictive low cal diet. I lost an ungodly amount of weight dropping from 160 to 112 lbs. It was far too skinny. Thankfully my partner was into partying and being the innocent Baptist rebel that I was I hadn't experienced partying yet... this led me into a life of indulgence of all the forms. So when I wasn't binge drinking and "partying" I was recovering with 3 fast food meals a day. (omg it makes me nauseous thinking back on it) I gained a little weight back and held steady at 135-140 which was comfortable and fit my body much better. I ended the toxic partnership going into 2013 and began my radical transformation, adding tattoos which expressed myself and feautured my body as a work of art, and playing with different hair styles. In 2014 I had spine surgery, fusing c3-4-5. This of course assisted in a little weight gain too. But what happened mainly from it all is that I experienced a huge spiritual awakening. I began my path to enlightenment especially after galavanting around festivals, even in my neck brace!!
This is when I lost my passion for producing and staring in videos. I tried to hire a friend to take over the business so I could continue to travel to festivals and the business would still run, but alas, it didn't work out. I realized quickly that no one will treat your business like you do. I traveled to Thailand 2014 into 2015 and realized that I was missing out on SO MUCH of life by dedicating it fully to this business which I had once been SO passionate about. That is when I decided to sell EVERYTING (I only kept what I could carry with me on board a plane besides a few childhood memories that I kept at my sisters house... and a few epic portraits that were gifted to me by fans) and leave for my round the world travels. I went to South Africa, Thailand, Cambodia, Malaysia, Indonesia, Mexico, Costa Rica, Guatemala, Nicaragua... this lasted almost 2 years when I realized my greatest joy and passion had morphed into my art of fire dancing. I then returned to the states and bought a van, converted it into my tiny home, and started on a US tour for fire performance. During this 2 year span I really dove deep into the expansion of my mind a cultivation of my evolutionary consciousness. I even studied for a year at a metaphysical meditation school in Guatemala. I believe when you open yourself to the spirit realm the body naturally puts on a layer of protection and in some humans in manifests in the form of weight. Perhaps that happened to me, though I at a comfortable 145 currently, where I was in the beginning of 2014. While on my travels I decided to indulge in many retreats in order to grow and experience as much as possible. Well... I blew through all my savings! I realized you definitely do not need a plethora of money to be happy... BUT you do need money to survive.
Since I hadn't updated my sites in years, the income from c4s was obviously going down. I spoke to Neil, the owner of c4s about selling my business. He helped me calculate the figure for which my company and all my content was worth. But I couldn't find a buyer. However, i had someone offer to do some things to help rally in some more income so that I could start paying my bills comfortably again. Some of those ideas involved re-releasing content and starting new stores. This is awesome because think of how many more people turned 18 since i started producing in 2011!!? And how many more people realized they had these fetishes?! AND since I was realeasing SO MUCH content at such a fast pace, how many of YOU missed out on some juicy ones that you simply couldn't afford at that time and then forgot about it?!
I really believe we can all benefit from what's happening here.
I'm totally open to new ideas on how to generate more income besides producing again. It would be difficult to do from inside my van anyways.
What do you guys want to see? Compilations? Package Videos?
Thank you for your support and feedback and mostly for holding space for me to share my story.
Feel free to email me. I rarely check this forum so email is best. xoTay