Body Image Support

This may seem like a little bit of an ironic thing to look for support for on here since most everyone is probably into the beautiful stick thin model types, but I figured if I could get support here of all places, it would give me sooo much more confidence.

I'm female, 24, 5'4" and am definitely curvy. I weigh about 170 (I went up a little bit during this whole quarantine thing.) I have some stretch marks mostly on my hips and thighs from growing so quickly when I was younger. I guess my main question is if there are any guys who are into girls who are on the short and curvy side. I'm a hopeless romantic and always dreamed of finding a guy who loves me for me, but having him be in love with my body too would he amazing 💕

What do you guys think? Is there any hope for that?

You bet there's hope. You sound awesome, anyone should be happy to have you.

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Don't write people off as all liking the same thing. There are all kinds of people into all kinds of bodies.

Ya there are def guys out there that like that,you will find someone ..but don't rush ��

I hate the whole "body image" phenomenon, because it creates shame and unnecessary victims where it simply doesn't exist.

As Adam Carolla said about it, "You ain't controlling my dick," and I not only agree, but I agree in all instances - men like what they like, and the same goes for women.

The general narrative of it seems to be, "all guys only like stick thin magazine models, and everyone else is screwed."

Hopefully the facts I will tell you brings you a new perspective on life and actual hope and a better view of yourself, because that's the intent.

SOME guys like the super thin magazine models, MANY don't. Maybe MOST.

I'm a guy. I don't care for the super thin model look, unless I knew one and we just clicked personality wise. I like women with big boobs, but... what's on the inside REALLY does count.

I've had two girls in my life circle for a while who had big boobs, one I had no attraction to, even though she could have been a model, the other I would have been attracted to her, if she had a full personality replacement,
...because they were both horrible people. Screwed many people over, destroyed relationships, talked shit behind people's backs, just horrible people. For me, the good looks vanish when that becomes apparent.

I've known several short, pudgy girls who met a guy, got married, had more than five kids, and are still married 20 years later. They're wonderful people, and obviously they're keeping their men happy, because they got a bunch
of kids and the men are always smiling when I see them!

I've seen every body shape out there, women and men, meet, date, get married, and stay married for decades.

People are attracted to who they're attracted to! I know women who like the athletic type of guys, who like Dwayne The Rock Johnson types, who like the Jeffrey Dean Morgan type, who like the overweight guy, the thin guy....

But you absolutely can't leave personality, intelligence, skills, sexual aspects, religious beliefs, interests, on and on, out of the equation. That adds a whole other aspect to everyone's love journey.

A person may find someone who is the physical type they're looking for, but doesn't match the personality type, the sexual type, the religious type, etc. at all.

You may want someone who has a tickle fetish, or who's a certain way in bed, or who is loud, or quiet, or thoughtful, or silly, or serious, or sexy, or a combination of many things.

Are common interests shared? Also, bonds form under hardships, so you may be in a situation with someone and grow close to them that you never expected.
You help someone through a health scare. (Trust me, some people make those things worse, or walk away.) You may get through a tough time at work, or just be a good worker over a long period
of time and they notice you. Work bonds often times are strong and lasting. You may go volunteer for a church BBQ or event, and work all day, and when it's all over with, someone noticed you, or you
make new friends through that hard ship, and as you enter that new world of their friendship, you meet someone they know, or someone they work with, and you guys just hit it off.

They're just SO much people are looking for life is so gray, there's no black and white. But the more you get out into the world and meet people, the better chances you have.

Most people I know met their significant others through work, at events, at weddings, through church. I've known very few people who met online, but even for them, the relationship grew off the internet
in the real world, so that would be my biggest suggestion. Go take walks in the park, join a gym (I had a friend who worked out a lot who pestered me to join a gym or cross fit, because that's where he met all his dates!)
go to comic book conventions when they open up again, go to plays, get on Facebook, and when people have events, go to them! I had a friend who played in a band....sometimes none of his Facebook friends would go to his shows.
I try to go to friend's art shows when I'm not working. One time I was this guy's only Facebook friend who showed up, even though he invited hundreds of people. But people who don't live online DO go to those events, and
that just opens a whole world of new opportunities to meet people.

Learn to talk to people, and listen to people, because as you aim to meet a new love, you're going to gain a lot of new friends on the way...

I hope some of the responses here helped. Let us know how you're doing when you get a chance, yeah?

TickleMeSilly7 said:

This may seem like a little bit of an ironic thing to look for support for on here since most everyone is probably into the beautiful stick thin model types, but I figured if I could get support here of all places, it would give me sooo much more confidence.

I'm female, 24, 5'4" and am definitely curvy. I weigh about 170 (I went up a little bit during this whole quarantine thing.) I have some stretch marks mostly on my hips and thighs from growing so quickly when I was younger. I guess my main question is if there are any guys who are into girls who are on the short and curvy side. I'm a hopeless romantic and always dreamed of finding a guy who loves me for me, but having him be in love with my body too would he amazing 💕

What do you guys think? Is there any hope for that?

Click to expand...

Let me put things in perspective for you:

I myself am extremely physically fit. I am a powerlifter and bodybuilder, very muscular etc. And I have dated:

A woman who was almost a full foot taller than me, women who were shorter than me.

Women who were aspiring fitness models with very low body fat percentage, and women with big ol' bellies and some extra weight.

A women who had an amazing body but her teeth were green and rotting from a condition she had no control over, and a woman who had stretch marks SO BAD her stomach literally looked like she was a burn victim.

I was equally, wildly, sexually attracted to all of them. I'm a "features" kind of guy -- I don't care so much if someone is tall or short or skinny or a little overweight, or has messed up teeth or stretch marks or is missing an eyeball LOL -- I'm personally attracted to things like certain shaped feet and hands, the shape of the nose, certain shaped lips etc -- stuff like weight or stretch marks really had no bearing on my attraction.

The chick with the stretch Mark's on her belly that were so bad it looked like Freddy Kreuger's skin -- I couldn't keep my hands off her. I was so infatuated with her face and her hands and her feet and the shape of her that these extreme stretch marks were so in the background for me that they were a NON FACTOR.

I honestly think you women have a real skewed perception on what is actually attractive. One of my exes never wore makeup or fake cosmetic stuff, never wore dresses or girly things -- she had a bit of a belly and was out of shape, and would walk through the door wearing Jean shorts and a flannel, unkempt and sweaty after a long day and a bullet couldn't have kept me away from her. And then I had an ex that was an instagram model that was fit and had definition in her stomach and obliques and would come over wearing tons of lipstick and makeup and I would be turned off because it was so synthetic. I would tell her to come over with no makeup in a tshirt and pajama pants and when she did, I was way more turned on. And if you ask me honestly who I was more attracted to, the honest answer is both -- the overweight chick had such raw, visceral beauty in her features that knocked me as head over heels as I was for the fitness model.

Attraction is a funny thing. Any brashness or abrasiveness in my terminology or descriptions were just to prove a point -- you can have flaws THAT BAD and there are still going to be people who are so crazy about you that they don't see them.

One finally thing, cliche as it is -- the body is nothing, without the soul. No physical flaw has ever repulsed me as much as a toxic spirit.

We all struggle with our body image from time to time. Sadly society has taught us to value a narrow, superficial idea of what constitutes beauty. I sincerely hope you meet the person or people who find you attractive as you are and also respect you for other traits as well

The first thing you must stop doing is assuming you know what's in the hearts of those you don't know.
You don't know what these men are into. They could want to ravish you, but you believe they like stick thin model-types, and so you'll write them off by accident.

So, what you're asking for is, "A man who likes me for me, and adores my body."

Most men will like you for your personality/spirit if you appeal to them.
Most men would love your body because that's actually a rather normal body type for this day and age.

https://app.mybodygallery.com/#/?height=163&weight=77&age=21

You are what is considered "THICC" I assume?

If so, that is quite sought after.

But then comes the next question. Do these men appeal to you?
For instance, I see black and latino men all the time with this type of woman where I live.
Skinny women are often times the ones who are the odd one out.
Do the men who approach you have any appeal to you?

Then comes the next question, which is in my mind very apparent.
How well do you value yourself? Do you overvalue yourself, have a healthy sense of value, or undervalue yourself?

Men and women value different things. Do you have the things that Men value?

It seems to me that you undervalue yourself because you don't know what men value, but you know what women in our global society are taught men value. Men don't value your body completely. It's a factor, not the end all be all.

And men don't often know what women value either.

A good place for you to start would be asking men you know what attracted them to their spouse/girlfriend/etc.

Ask yo daddeh, ask yo brotha, ask yo uncle and grandfatha.
ask yo parson ask yo priest, ask tha dude out on tha street


Let's look at what we hear a woman/man values.

Here's stuff I hear often.
"I want a guy who's rich."
"I want a guy with a good job."
"I want a guy to respect me."
"I want a guy who's got it together."

Here's what I hear when I hear those statements."
"I want someone who is stable enough to provide safety, comfort and defend the home."
At the basic level we are all animals. That's why there's a phrase called "Creature Comforts".

That's why I say do your research. Ask what people like.
Don't assume.
Ask.

That is all.

TickleMeSilly7 said:

This may seem like a little bit of an ironic thing to look for support for on here since most everyone is probably into the beautiful stick thin model types, but I figured if I could get support here of all places, it would give me sooo much more confidence.

I'm female, 24, 5'4" and am definitely curvy. I weigh about 170 (I went up a little bit during this whole quarantine thing.) I have some stretch marks mostly on my hips and thighs from growing so quickly when I was younger. I guess my main question is if there are any guys who are into girls who are on the short and curvy side. I'm a hopeless romantic and always dreamed of finding a guy who loves me for me, but having him be in love with my body too would he amazing ��

What do you guys think? Is there any hope for that?

Click to expand...

170 is a hot size. Throw on some pantyhose and a nice dress and really show off your figure. My significant other is trying to get back to 170. In fact, I still masturbate to her photos from when she was around your age and was between 170 and 180ish. She is about your height too. She's 5'5"

I remember years ago when Maxim Magazine would rate the 100 sexiest female celebrities every year. 100 being the least sexy and 1 being the most. They had guys from all walks of life rate who they thought was the sexiest, most beautiful woman in the public eye and then tallied the results. I don't remember the exact numbers but Anna Kournikova was rated somewhere in the 80s whereas Kelly Clarkson was in the 60s. Yes, curvy little Kelly Clarkson was rated higher than the tall, skinny tennis phenom. I know Kelly's weight goes up and down but at the time she definitely weighed more than Anna. So not only is it not true that all men like skinny little blondes but it seems like certain curvy women are generally preferred over certain skinny women.

Late again to another thread...

I happen to be the kind of heterosexual male who is attracted to many kinds of women. I have a foot fetish and a foot-tickling fetish, and so I do glance at a woman's feet more than the rest of her body. But generally speaking, the number of traits I'm looking for in a long-term partner is not very long:

• must be born female
• must be turned on by being tickled on her feet (and perhaps other body parts)
• must have nice-looking feet, and must be willing to get pedicures (or give herself pedicures) regularly
• must be a good, kind, understanding person
• must be of average intelligence or higher
• must have a full-time job, or in search of one, or in school to get a (better) full-time job
• must like me for me, despite all my differences and quirks (for instance, I have some Aspie traits) (don't worry, I'm harmless)

Please note that body shape, body size, body weight, body height, etc., are NOT LISTED. The only thing I mentioned about a woman's body was her feet, and that's only because my two fetishes are specific to a woman's feet. (I can't help it! To quote Lady Gaga, I was born this way!) I'm not asking for much...

Certainly, if you have other positive attributes, those are just added bonuses in my book.
Involved with a civic group? Socially aware? Politically active? Charitable? That's all kinds of awesome.
None of those? No worries. You don't have to be.