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Results 1 to 10 of 10
  1. #1
    Join Date
    Apr 2004
    Posts
    49

    Best sites for online dating?

    Back in 2005 I used Plenty of Fish and there were lots of real people on there. I met 6 or 7 different ladies over the next couple of years. Fast forward to 2022. WTF? I am on Okcupid. I currently have 37 likes but nobody sending messages. I can't see who likes me without signing up for a paid plan so pretty pointless. Once you have gone through the list of people in your area you can only see about a dozen profiles per day before it says you are out of matches. I also signed up for Tinder. Seems to be full of fake profiles. Again you run out of searches quickly. How are people meeting nowadays? My cousin (female) used Bumble and met a guy. Does it work well at all for men? I'm at a dead end for meeting anyone for a session so going back to the method of finding someone using online dating and hoping for the best.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Mar 2017
    Location
    44333 ohio
    Posts
    355
    Ok cupid is a HUGE waste of time. I think Match.com and Hinge are decent, hinge over match in my opinion. And bumble.
    Please forgive any and all typos i dont catch. I have big hands and they dont play well with a touchscreen keyboard.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jul 2001
    Location
    USA
    Posts
    601
    I've had some great conversations with a bunch of women through Tinder (and also a bunch of not so great conversation), but I agree, Tinder seems to have a lot of fake profiles and also people fishing for Instagram and Snapchat followers. A friend of mine said it best that on Tinder people don't seem to know what they're looking g for, but on Hinge they do. So I plan on trying out Hinge sometime soon.

    In my opinion, unless you're in your low to mid 20s, Plenty of Fish and OK Cupid are a waste of time (they're also owned by the same company). And also in my opinion, the days of Match.com and E Haromony are dead. Unless you're in your 50s+.

    I've had a bunch of matches with Bumble, but the 24 hr limit until the match expires seems like a bait for guys to pay money and a dumb design. Like, why put a 24 limit until the match expires unless trying to milk guys for money? Shady it seems. Just give the girl time to respond, the 24 limit forces them to be on everyb24 hrs which is also shady.

    I did pay for a subscription for Tinder though, which I've found to be worth it. You can see who swipes right on you first instead of endlessly wasting time swiping, you get 5 Superlikes a day (most of my matches have been Superlikes), you get endless swipes per day vs the free version which caps how many swipes you can make in a 24 hr period, and you can get 1 Boost every month (the boosts seem worthless to me). The superlikes put you ahead of the line and if you have good photos and a good profile, they seem to really work well. The key is working on those photos and profile though for sure.

    That said, I do think there is still some bullshit shadyness on Tinder even with the subscription. Like it seems as though they'll occasionally "match" you with a fake profile to keep you paying. But I have also had plenty of good matches as well.

    Good luck.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Apr 2004
    Posts
    49
    For some reason I can't use the Hinge app on my android phone. It isn't available on PC either.

    I am having the worst success with Tinder. No real matches at all. Just 3 fake profiles that "liked" me. They never responded after that.

    I agree Okcupid sucks. 37 likes but I can't see a single one of them and nobody sends a message. Just a notice that I have the likes.

    Bumble actually seems to have the most "real" women with an actual location of where they live. Still the same crap with "likes" that I can't see.

    I really don't think online dating works at all. Any alternatives with success like fetlife or others that produce results. People have to be hooking up somehow?

    Even though I'm in my early 50's I am desperate enough to start asking out the 20 something year olds at the grocery store checkout. LOL.

    Jesus! I just created an account on adult friend finder. Can't so much as send a like without paying. I give up.

    Honestly, where the fuck do you meet women nowadays? So frustrated with the world we live in. I never meet single women through my job. I don't go out much. Not bar hopping at 50+ years old. Never had any luck with that anyways.
    Last edited by pinksocks; 11-23-2022 at 11:39 PM.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jul 2001
    Location
    USA
    Posts
    601
    Quote Originally Posted by pinksocks View Post

    Even though I'm in my early 50's I am desperate enough to start asking out the 20 something year olds at the grocery store checkout. LOL.
    Don't do this lol.

    Tinder is definitely for a younger crowd so that is probably a big part of why it isn't working out for you.

    Single women are out there. And they're livng their lives. And I think that is a big key part. Live your own life too. Interested people are typically interesting. Which means have interests. And be social. You mentioned you don't go out much, but that you're also frustrated with the way the world is. Your chances drop dramatically of meeting someone if you aren't taking up social interests and going out.

    Good luck friend.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Aug 2004
    Location
    Cambridgshire
    Posts
    2,402
    I've tried three sites mainly:

    Match: For me, the most productive in terms of dates and conversations, however the profile photo album usability has been poor for years - for some weird reason, you can only use certain photos from your profile as you main photo. If you upload a lovely new photo, you won't necessarily be able to use it as the main photo without deleting another one. It's very bizarre and inconsistent. I've had many rows with them about it. Infuriating and basic to resolve, but still it's poor. Actually, the whole website has had little upgrade in terms of the basic profiling/matching, but some new things have come along, such as live chat rooms with themes.
    I've also had many rows with them over their promotion of the paid membership stating that you get 'unlimited messaging'... my argument being that it is actually VERY limited, given that a user can only reply to you if they ALSO have a paid membership. What's the point in messaging someone if they can't reply? I might as well message a brick wall, or bribe another user to reply by covering their membership too. That is very limiting for a dating site.. hardly going to lead to a date is it?! So I've always bought the additional add-on to ensure anyone can reply.
    They often do deals and it's worth waiting for those (or complaining, like I did, and getting a deal offered to you by way of apology).

    POF: Recently, you can only send one message per day with a free account. Before this, it was worth using because it was entirely free, but I only ever really had a couple of meaningful exchanges, and unfortunately the only promising one was during the pandemic, which wasn't sustained long enough to make it real. I always got the impression there were lot more people on there looking for casual hookups, and also a lot more fake/spam profiles.

    Asexual Cupid: I'm on the Ace spectrum and this website is becoming quite significant. I'm paid up, it's reasonable and I've had more contact/dates from this than any other. Obviously it's limiting in terms of numbers registered and finding someone within proximity, but it's certainly gathering pace, and also useful for making friends who share the Ace thing. Weirdly, locations are abbreviated into three letters.. so DOR could mean Dorchester or Dorking or Dortmund..

    Pacattack touches upon a key point - there's no point continually seeking refuge online/behind a screen - get out there socialising! It's scarier.. and often later in life it will mean taking up a new hobby or trying somewhere/something outside of your comfort zone. I have plenty of hobbies, but none of them are yielding results.. so now I'm considering taking this advice myself and trying a gym class or new hobby.

    Wishing you the best of luck!

    TTG
    Fun Male ler in the UK. Sometimes a very ticklish and willing lee!

    feel free to say hello, pics & info in profile, I would be happy to talk to any of you about anything, especially fellow UK dwellers.


  7. #7
    Join Date
    Apr 2004
    Posts
    49
    Don't agree with the advice to get out there. I have not yet EVER met a woman I was attracted to who wasn't already married. At least with online dating you know the majority of people (if they are legit) are single and looking for someone.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Apr 2004
    Posts
    49
    Here is my experience with the following sites. Okcupid is actually pretty good. I have had conversations with 3 people who are actually real and not scammers or fake profiles. There is also an option to answer questions and see if you "agree" or "disagree" with a potential match. The fun part is some of the questions are "are you kinky", "are you fetish friendly" and "how do you feel about bondage in the bedroom".

    Tinder is for all intents and purposes absolutely useless. At least for me as a 52 year old. No contact with anyone on this site.

    Bumble is pretty decent. I have talked to 2 different ladies on here.

    Adult friend finder is a joke. I was dumb enough to pay for the premium service for 3 months. No contact here from anyone other than scammers. There is literally nobody online in my area even though there are hundreds of profiles in the area I live in. I also read hundreds of 1 star reviews about this site saying it is a huge scam and to stay away.

    Fetlife confuses me. No action here at all. I give up on that one.

    Back to the site that I have always had success with in the past. Plenty of Fish. I signed up yesterday and already have over 50 likes. I have already communicated with someone tonight but that seems to have fizzled out. I made a separate post on that looking for feedback from females only. I paid for the upgraded service to see who had liked me and to be honest, the majority of the profiles seem to be legit. Already received 5 or 6 messages from ladies making conversation. They are definitely not fake profiles as these are older, somewhat unattractive ladies.

    Online dating F'n sucks! LOL

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Feb 2002
    Location
    NC
    Posts
    13,834
    I haven't done this yet myself, but I have a friend who met his current girlfriend through Meetup. It's not specifically a dating site, but it's designed to meet people with similar interests. My friend used it for meeting people interested in hiking, camping, and other outdoors stuff. He ended up having good chemistry with a woman in that group.

    This seems like the most natural approach. Find people you have something in common with, and then if one of them happens to vibe well with you, then you can attempt to ask her out.

    This more closely resembles the "old fashioned" way of dating, which IMHO is the most reliable way to meet and relate to someone.

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Jul 2001
    Location
    USA
    Posts
    601
    Quote Originally Posted by MrMacphisto View Post
    I haven't done this yet myself, but I have a friend who met his current girlfriend through Meetup. It's not specifically a dating site, but it's designed to meet people with similar interests. My friend used it for meeting people interested in hiking, camping, and other outdoors stuff. He ended up having good chemistry with a woman in that group.

    This seems like the most natural approach. Find people you have something in common with, and then if one of them happens to vibe well with you, then you can attempt to ask her out.

    This more closely resembles the "old fashioned" way of dating, which IMHO is the most reliable way to meet and relate to someone.
    This is a great way to get out there and meet new people OP. Regardless of your past experience with "getting out there"...

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