I'm not anti-natalist, but I'm absolutely anti-people having children who aren't ready to be or really shouldn't be parents. Realistically, most people come up from compromised circumstances, but everybody comes into this world innocent and deserves no less than a chance to become a good, strong person and succeed. And if you look in the mirror and realize that you can't provide those things in some form, and rather expect the child to do something for YOU or YOUR emotional needs, then starting a family is just an act of selfishness, if not cruelty. I take no shame in admitting because I see no reason why I could give the life and childhood I would want for them, I am not going to take that leap and start a family unless I do.
For some people, religion, faith in politics and community is enough for them. I think that a lot of them, including my parents were mistaken. Some people apologize to their children for those failures and tell them not to be like them. Others stand by their toxicity and foolishness and punish, even attempt to control a child and literally discourage and set them up for failure, just for challenging their ways or their self-view. IT IS A FACT that nature and life can be brutal and unforgiving. But there are people who if born with the right circumstances and help can have a really good life. But that's NEVER a guarantee, and a lot of people are wrong about who they think they are and what they can do.
Religion and media have told people for centuries that people SHOULD procreate, so most parents, especially Americans despite their education, are coerced into it by societal pressure. As long as they admitted what they were wrong about and don't abuse their child, a halfcocked pregnancy can still have good results.
And YES, if people didn't procreate, society would crumble. But is that worth so many innocent children going through very adult problems because their parent were pressured to contribute a person for society? On a planet grossly overpopulated by humans already?
I would make sure before doing anything that this person is going to be a good parent.
In a way, I actually PREFER the way you're doing it, as opposed to 100% in-vitro fertilization. But not because it's safe for you. It absolutely isn't. She could still get you for child support or even charge you with sexual assault if she's THAT kind of screwed up person. And the truth is, she's not your partner or your friend, you don't know her or what she's capable of. If she likes your attributes so much (which again I find a sign of a potentially bad parent), and wants to make such an investment, I'd say she should have no problem get to know you first.
People's ability to be good in spite of life struggles is not very good. there aren't many truly noble people, just people who like to be viewed that way. Trusting people at face value is not possible anymore, most of them are not above the influence of other people's evil. When I was younger, some relationships of mine ended with women doing things I NEVER imagined they were capable of, to ME. Then again, I was blinded by love in the past. You seem to be blinded by libido.
Even if this were a good friend of yours, you don't know somebody until you fight them. Have a serious disagreement with somebody and stand your ground, watch how they react. That defines what kind of person they are far more than talking about what you believe in.
Get to know them, because if she demands your support one day, the State is NOT going to let YOUR child go without just because you two had a verbal agreement years ago. And if things end anything like it did for some fathers I've known who have been through this, when you're ordered you to pay child support, unless you're wealthy, you'll be living under the poverty level, giving most of your money, not even directly to your child necessarily, but to the mother who can do whatever she wants with it, like not work.
And on top of that, if you never even went to a custody hearing, she would reserve the right to even not let you see them until you get permission from the court. Just try doing that with a person who has come to a point that they decided they want nothing to do with you. Somewhere within that child's 18 years, you'll always be at risk of being called "dangerous" or "unfit" in court every time you two have an argument. And the child, who may love you unconditionally as their father, will be dragged into it, having lies put in their head. I'm not saying this for nothing, this is something I and many of my peers experienced growing up, some even being told to lie about their other parent in court.
So yeah, you really would benefit from getting to know this person. Because a fun weekend of tickling to share stories about may create a struggle for you and many people's lives for years to come.
As for the aspect of tickling, I thought about this recently. You haven't even told her that you're planning to tickle her. You haven't talked to her about tickling at all, so you have no idea if she's even ticklish. She could be a complete dud for what you're interested in.
Not that it's very important given the other things mentioned. But it's possible that all you'll get out of this is the opportunity to donate your sperm. Unless donating your sperm is REALLY important to you, you could just be agreeing to be screwed over, for no social or emotional investment whatsoever. You want to potentially be used like a dummy by the first person who throws themself at you, I mean that's a red flag that she doesn't respect your intelligence. She likely KNOWS that she can do all of this to you, but that if she offers you sex, a person like YOU won't think with your head, but with your genitals.
In the end, I hate to see harm come to children because they had a bad start. This woman's a stranger to you, you have no idea what HER childhood was like, how it influenced her, or what influence that would have on the kid. Or her family, if she has a relationship with them, what influence would they have.
We all have to deal with difficulties in the circumstances we're born into, and it's easy enough to tell a random kid "everybody has to deal with this", but when you're the one who made the decisions and actions that made their life possible, and the things one or both parents does turns out to serve as one of the worst enemies they'll struggle with in life, they're going to ask "why did you think it was okay to make me deal with this"? If it was all over you getting laid, they'll never trust you or your morality.
For various reasons, I hope that you reconsider what you're thinking about doing and at least get to know this person first. And in my opinion, if she cares about your wellbeing, she'll ask you for involvement in getting in-vitro fertilization. And she'll ONLY ask of it from you because she respects you and anybody involved in making a baby enough to offer the person they were making it with the closure that she would take good care of them. I hope that you reconsider.
