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Is tickling cheating

Swertz

Swertz

TMF Poster
Joined
Sep 9, 2004
Messages
144
Points
18
As a married man with a tickling fetish if you tickle another female is that cheating?

I've always been into tickling especially a female's feet but does any of you guys on here who are married do you consider tickling another female cheating?

Just wanted to start a conversation.
 
wertzsteven said:
As a married man with a tickling fetish if you tickle another female is that cheating?

I've always been into tickling especially a female's feet but does any of you guys on here who are married do you consider tickling another female cheating?

Just wanted to start a conversation.
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Depends on the situation. Flirting isn't cheating.
But if you have a tickling fetish, some things that are just flirty to vanillas can be pretty close to cheating, if not blatantly so.
Every relationship has it own boundaries, and every situation is different.
 
If you’re asking, it probably is… if you have to hide it, or are worried about it, then you already know your answer. This is something to discuss with your partner, not try to justify it here :)
 
Regrettably it isn't our call. The definition is made by the wife or girlfriend, and unfortunately for those whose fingertips want to wander elsewhere, it's up to her how she reacts.
 
I mean, I honestly don't think there is a black and white answer here. There are a lot of factors at play. One of the main factors would be how your significant other would feel about you getting hands on with another woman. I guess it would also depend on your relationship with the ticklee and to what extent are you tickling her.

Is it a long-term female best friend? Someone you've known since your early school days? A co-worker? Or is it some completely random woman you met in public or online somewhere? I have tickled one of my female best friends before in front of my fiancee (attempted to, she's not ticklish AT ALL) and she was whatever about it due to our long-standing friendship since freshman year of high school.

However if I walked up to a random pretty girl in public and started tickling and touching her, my fiancee would definitely leave me or there would be Hell to pay.

Also to what extent is the tickling? Is it a quick little poke in the side? Quickly dragging your finger up and down her foot? Or are you tying her up, stripping her down to her bra and panties, and having a full on session?

At the end of the day though, like Libertine said, it isn't up to you or us to decide if what you did is cheating. That's up to your partner and whether or not she feels she has been cheated on and if she can still trust you. That's up to the openness and honesty between the two of you, and if any agreements are in place.

Think about it and ask yourself. How would your wife feel or react if she caught you tickling the hell out of a woman? How would you feel if you caught her tickling a man all over?

Also in regard to Wolf's comment, my fiancee would strongly disagree with you about flirting, and many other women probably would as well. If you have a girlfriend, fiancee, wife, and you're flirting with someone else, that could be grounds for cheating.

#source: life experience. I have been discovered by my girlfriend once or twice before having a conversation about tickling and ticklishness between myself and another woman or two. While I never acted on it and the conversations never took a sexual turn, she treated the conversation as cheating and we almost broke up. To this day I am still making it up to her and I feel bad about it. I used to think flirting isn't cheating if it's just words but many people disagree. Same for tickling conversations.
 
BlueLine7045 said:
Also in regard to Wolf's comment, my fiancee would strongly disagree with you about flirting, and many other women probably would as well. If you have a girlfriend, fiancee, wife, and you're flirting with someone else, that could be grounds for cheating.

#source: life experience. I have been discovered by my girlfriend once or twice before having a conversation about tickling and ticklishness between myself and another woman or two. While I never acted on it and the conversations never took a sexual turn, she treated the conversation as cheating and we almost broke up. To this day I am still making it up to her and I feel bad about it. I used to think flirting isn't cheating if it's just words but many people disagree. Same for tickling conversations.
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As I said, every relationship has its own boundaries, and every relationship is different.
#source: mutual respect and honesty, with your partner and yourself.
My wife and I are very clear on what's acceptable, and what's not. That's how you avoid situations like the one you've described.
 
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For me, it would be cheating. That is because for me tickling or being tickled is an erotic act. :devil:
You and your wife should come to an understanding about what is erotic for you and for her.
 
It depends on the person.

A playful tickle for someone who considers it just that, playful, and does not have a fetish or get turned on by tickling another person, then no it is not cheating.

For someone of this forum, if they find tickling erotic, or a sexual turn on, and said person has a partner, who either does let that person tickle them or even if the partner does not let the partner tickle them, it is cheating unless the person's partner gives them consent to tickle another person.

If I had a gf, whether I tickled her, never,, rarely,. sometimes, or often, to me, tickling would be cheating, because I find tickling a sexual turn on, and I am getting sexual excitement from tickling another person besides my partner.
 
4Pawz said:
If you’re asking, it probably is… if you have to hide it, or are worried about it, then you already know your answer. This is something to discuss with your partner, not try to justify it here :)
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Exactly this
 
Cheating of any kind is defined by your individual relationship. If you have to hide it or your partner wouldn’t be ok with it, it’s cheating. If you have a partner that says it’s ok to tickle someone else or get tickled, it’s not.
 
I used to have a dear friend who would give advice like this…

“If you think you’re drinking too much, you’re probably drinking too much.”

I think that same philosophy is true here.

If you are in a committed relationship, and you think tickling someone else is cheating, it probably is.

I was approached several months back to have a session with one of the best all time “MILF”s in the tickling business. I adore this model. I tried to rationalize a million different ways to have this session. At the end of the day, all I could see was the hurt heart and sad face of my beautiful (and volatilely ticklish) wife. And I knew it was cheating.

There is no right justification for wrong action.
 
Yes, because you are intentionally acting on something that gives you sexual pleasure with another person.
 
Idk guys. I think I disagree with the general consensus of yes. Let me preface this: I agree every relationship is different. I agree there should be boundaries. I agree that, obviously, tickling can be sexual at times for me.
Here's my rationale for playing devils advocate: are you guys not able to differentiate between just being playful or friendly/having fun from a sexual act or venture? Are you incapable of tickling a foot without being sexually aroused or thinking of further spots to attack?
Let me be clear, obviously your relationship with the lee in this scenario matters. Obviously, if I started tickling a girl's inner thighs or breast area my fiancee would be upset at the touching of an overall sexual region. Having said that, I don't think she would be upset if I tickled a friend's armpit or foot or poked at her belly, and think as a vanilla she would just join in for fun.
As I complete writing this, I will also add that maybe I am just not as strong of a tickle fetishist, as I can be a ruthless ler and have fun as a struggling lee, but I can dissociate from that whenever I want. Maybe my thoughts on this are due to my feelings for tickling maybe not being as strong as others
 
Technically id say it is. maybe on a smaller level. im in a 4 year relationship, but once a year i do a paid tickling session to get my fix. no harm done in my mind. im not proud of it, but a man has his needs. :shrug:
 
maniactickler said:
Technically id say it is. maybe on a smaller level. im in a 4 year relationship, but once a year i do a paid tickling session to get my fix. no harm done in my mind. im not proud of it, but a man has his needs. :shrug:
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How did maniactickler end up with someone who isn't ticklish?!!!
SMH
 
Just to move the conversation forward a bit, let me pose a question to you....

What would your spouse say if you had an open, calm conversation about their views on the boundaries of harmless flirting, as compared to crossing-the-line cheating? You could even include tickling in the list of possible flirtations, without presenting the entire conversation as tickling-related.

It might diffuse defensiveness from the conversation by starting with harmless flirting that you saw your partner do, which you could explain that you did consider harmless. And you're seeking clarity and openness.

Framing a higher minded conversation about the naturalness and fun of harmless flirting as a principle, seems to me, would be a much better approach than you asking for permission to tickle other women.
 
brotherted said:
Just to move the conversation forward a bit, let me pose a question to you....

What would your spouse say if you had an open, calm conversation about their views on the boundaries of harmless flirting, as compared to crossing-the-line cheating? You could even include tickling in the list of possible flirtations, without presenting the entire conversation as tickling-related.

It might diffuse defensiveness from the conversation by starting with harmless flirting that you saw your partner do, which you could explain that you did consider harmless. And you're seeking clarity and openness.

Framing a higher minded conversation about the naturalness and fun of harmless flirting as a principle, seems to me, would be a much better approach than you asking for permission to tickle other women.
Click to expand...

Aside from the tactic of "you do this, so it's okay for me to do this" opening salvo, I'm not sure framing it that way would be effective, unless the spouse also had a kink that is easily dismissed/disguised as "harmless flirting".

My wife knows I love to flirt. I love to make women feel good about themselves, regardless of whether I find them attractive. She also knows I can tickle someone playfully without it being sexually charged, and she also knows what kind of tickling is sexually charged for me.
It all comes down to context and intent.
 
4Pawz said:
If you’re asking, it probably is… if you have to hide it, or are worried about it, then you already know your answer. This is something to discuss with your partner, not try to justify it here :)
Click to expand...

This is a really straightforward and thorough answer OP
 
Not in my opinion. If you aren’t catching feelings, kissing or having sex then I would say you’re in the clear.
 
Wolf said:
Aside from the tactic of "you do this, so it's okay for me to do this" opening salvo, I'm not sure framing it that way would be effective, unless the spouse also had a kink that is easily dismissed/disguised as "harmless flirting".

My wife knows I love to flirt. I love to make women feel good about themselves, regardless of whether I find them attractive. She also knows I can tickle someone playfully without it being sexually charged, and she also knows what kind of tickling is sexually charged for me.
It all comes down to context and intent.
Click to expand...

Your wife sounds very patient, accepting, and understanding. I am generally the same way as you in that I love to make a woman, or anyone honestly, feel good about themselves. I've given men compliments before and women as well. But really what it is for me is the playfulness of flirting. The back and forth banter. I don't need to be attracted to a woman or like her to flirt. It's more like a fun, teasing game for me. Again, I agree. Not all tickling is sexual for me. Sometimes I am just genuinely curious about whether or not someone is ticklish and want to try it for fun. I tried doing the sit and talk with my fiancee, prior to any incidents, and she basically lost her marbles.

I love her to death and I would never do anything to hurt her again, but I won't lie I am slightly envious of some of you on here who's wives are so understanding and don't just jump off the deep end at first chance.

Also for those of you whose wives help you tickle others or do it intentionally I'm front of you. Sexy.
 
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