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Safewords

As a lee, I don't use them. I only want the person to stop if I am in pain or actually can't breathe, in which case I'll signal that to them. As a ler, I allow my lees to have a safeword if they really think they'll need it. My husband doesn't need one but some of my friends do.
 
I prefer playing without. It's the whole control and respect thing for me. She respects and trusts me to take good care of her, even Im torturing the living shit out of her and I pay good attention to her during play and read her signals.
But I always respect if someone I play with want to use safewords.

Remeber....communication is the key to kinky happiness! 🙂
 
Cavum said:
I prefer playing without. It's the whole control and respect thing for me. She respects and trusts me to take good care of her, even Im torturing the living shit out of her and I pay good attention to her during play and read her signals.
But I always respect if someone I play with want to use safewords.

Remember....communication is the key to kinky happiness! 🙂
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Absolutely!
 
I'm not a fan of them normally. I like to think the people tickling me can tell when I need a break and when I don't.
 
I have one just in case, mostly for playing with new people, but most stop before the safeword point anyway.
 
I do not like them, I like to just tickle and have my way, however my girl is soooooo ticklish that she has to have them and this far has never lasted pass 60 seconds without using it. But bless her heart she is so competitive and wants to please me she does her best. I have made her into a ler, she loves to get revenge and I don't need one
 
We have a safeword for other activities than tickling, used as a safety measure only. When we first met- we had the safeword for tickling because he didnt know my limits.... we removed it after the first meeting. I love not having a safeword... it brings something more - intense- to the table I think... knowing you cant stop it... he's loves to tease me when he's attacking one of my worst spots by saying "bet you wish you had a safeword now, huh?" I wouldnt change it for the world 🙂
 
iloveddub said:
Who uses them, and are there rules? I personally don't like them.
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Well I think I have expressed my opinion on this subject many times...*lol. I don't mind a lee using a safeword. I would disappointed from a tickler's point of view when she uses it but its more for her then me. What kind of a tool would I be if I said "No, I have no control over myself and I really could care less that you are a person." If you can't control yourself...then you have no right to control others. From a ler point of view I wouldn't trust anyone that doesn't give the option of using them at least. Most of the time if a lee likes being pushed beyond their limits they won't say it anyway. But at least its there to say you can trust me so we both can enjoy this.
 
If I know someone really well, then I don't need one. But if I am playing with someone who doesn't know me, I want to have one because I can't be sure the person can read my signals right. More often than not the ler will be too careful if there is no safeword instead of overdoing it.
 
When fetishes are put above feelings...that's when it is time to quit and seek therapy.
 
My opinion on the matter is usually made clear. I am a ler though have only playfully with my female friends been a lee (the only difference is playful doesn't last very long i most cases- it is more for being silly to me than a more serious long term session). When either I or a friend are having a short play tickle no safe word is used. Neither is one if my lee feels comfortable with a long session, though I give one anyway just in case (don't want to misread a situation). Whenever someone asks I give a safe word and I usually follow 99% of the time. Even if they only use it to stop for a breath then want tickling to continue.
 
ticklemepls said:
We have a safeword for other activities than tickling, used as a safety measure only. When we first met- we had the safeword for tickling because he didnt know my limits.... we removed it after the first meeting. I love not having a safeword... it brings something more - intense- to the table I think... knowing you cant stop it... he's loves to tease me when he's attacking one of my worst spots by saying "bet you wish you had a safeword now, huh?" I wouldnt change it for the world 🙂
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It is almost the same for me and my girlfriend. In the beginning of our relationship she had a safeword when I tickled her. But after a while we decided not to use one, cause we also think it makes the tickling experience more intense and exciting when she has absolutely no control, and that I'm the only one who decide when the tickling stops. Also she obvioulsy knows that she can trust me and that I will stop when I see that she really can't take anymore.
 
I dont use them any more as long as I trust my ler (which I do). I like being completely out of control. 😉
 
I do like the idea of having one for rests....then the mayhem begins again. Everything is always consensual, no real misery. 🙂
 
ticklemepls said:
We have a safeword for other activities than tickling, used as a safety measure only. When we first met- we had the safeword for tickling because he didnt know my limits.... we removed it after the first meeting. I love not having a safeword... it brings something more - intense- to the table I think... knowing you cant stop it... he's loves to tease me when he's attacking one of my worst spots by saying "bet you wish you had a safeword now, huh?" I wouldnt change it for the world 🙂
Click to expand...

I feel the same way. It makes the tickling session more intense. The experience is magnified when the session is followed by intense sex. ...mmm sexxxx.

The only reason I can think of ever needing to use one is if the person doing the tickling either does not know when to ease up (at least with certain lees) or is too inexperienced as a ler. Thankfully, this hasn't been a problem for me in any sessions I've had as a lee or a ler.
 
RdmNm said:
I feel the same way. It makes the tickling session more intense. The experience is magnified when the session is followed by intense sex. ...mmm sexxxx.

The only reason I can think of ever needing to use one is if the person doing the tickling either does not know when to ease up (at least with certain lees) or is too inexperienced as a ler. Thankfully, this hasn't been a problem for me in any sessions I've had as a lee or a ler.
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I just think its the lee's call whether one should exists. I only have a problem with lers that think its their call to have one or not.
 
Ticklerguy4u said:
I just think its the lee's call whether one should exists. I only have a problem with lers that think its their call to have one or not.
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I agree, it should obviously be the 'lee alone who decide if he/she wants to have a safeword or not. No doubt about that!
 
I prefer playing without safewords, but it's a good idea to have one, especially with new lees, so they can go absolutely crazy with tears and begging and you don't have to guess whether they're actually past their limit or not.
 
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