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Bellas New Life - "You lose….i win" FF/F F/F

Excellent story! Loved the opening, and the way that the brutal tactics were initiated and escalated really enhanced the enjoyment of reading it as the story continued to unfold. Definitely another story where you find yourself rooting for the bad guys.
 
this is still January, and we've already got the Golden Feather Award winner for Fiction Story

So lets get this stright ... your story is just wipe the floor of most story in the story section. in fact, the reader get all of it! climax, description, amazing plot, perfect details, and its just masterpiece. really really state of art! which is great! this one is sharper than any other story in this section!

this is trully trully trully brilliant story! every word, every line, every paragraph are perfect, and as a reader you need to read one by one to reach its climax. i remember my fav writer three years ago, he had a great writing skill just like you. he won the golden feather award, and i hope you'll get that one.

its a wonderful story! awesome!
 
It has bussiness and legal aspect in the story makes this one is trully masterpiece.

i just read for the first time and feel thats not enough, now i read it for the second time.

its trully decent ... no ... trully terrific story.

"tell and show" element is in here, and not forget to honorable mention superb characterization
makes the reader knows and familiar with every character from the beginning to the end
 
Thankyou for your kind words….when i read back over it now theres parts that i want to improve on. But this was my first stab at it….im writing P2 as we speak…titled "Bella - brought to heel"
 
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