can;t stand Over-protective,controlling parents!!

tickleshotel · Jul 27, 2006

As many of you know I live with my folks,I am working full time and yesterday was my 41st birthday..I thank all who have responded to my Happy Birthday thread ,this is an account of how my birthday actually went..I hope next year is alot better.. :shock:

I didn;t get to celebrate my birthday much as I had to work 2pm to 10pm and I received no presents,just a card from my folks and a happy birthday card from my work..
After work I had a co-worker that took me out for a few drinks and she had bought a room for me for the night at the Resort I work at,my friend at work is a Concierge..I had a few drinks and I knew I wasn;t going to drive so being the mature responsible person I am,I called home to my folks and told them that I was fine,that I wasn;t coming home and I was staying the night at the Resort..OMG,what a disaster!,they demanded that I was not going to stay out all night,and I was coming home and they were going to come pick me up ..My friend who is a Concierge got her feelings hurt as she did this surprise for me which I knew nothing about,and I feel I am maturing,being the responsible one while my parents are wayyy over proective and controlling! Geeze,I just turned 41 years old and I am treated like I am 16?! :sowrong:

I;d like to get some thoughts on this,isn;t the right thing to do is what I did?by knowing that I was *not* going to drive,that in my mind I was in the company of friends who were showing me a good time,making sure that I was in good hands,safe..I feel sad,angry that my parents had no concern of how my friend who is a Concierge at work felt,how my parents in their mind prob thought they were doing the right thing but they ruined my birthday for me! My friends at hearing how my parents reacted were all in agreement that my parents are like no parents they have known before,and they are using their control over me because I still live at home..Now,my next step is adding to the account I already have to move on having my own place which I will be looking for that is within my budget

milagros317 · Jul 27, 2006

You did the responsible thing by calling them to tell them you wouldn't be home, so that they wouldn't worry. Their reaction was not appropriate for parents of an adult. Sigh.

My only advice is to save you money now as fast as you can, and move into your own place (alone or with a roommate to save expenses) when you can. :cuddle:

Deadsea7777 · Jul 27, 2006

Is very difficult to give an opinion, if you are still with your parents they could not be that bad.
I advice you next time you leave, do not say when are you going to be back, do not call. Get them used to it.
If they scream for that put wax in your ears.
Do not menace to move out unless you really mean it. That will weaken your position.

DannyMc · Jul 27, 2006

Hi Laurie , by you saying folks , I took that as an affectionate feeling , I dont know you or your parents but I take it you being 41 and still at home that there's good family unity ...... " She'll always be our little girl"......... can sometimes play a part and not to be meant disrespectfully . Parents will look out for their childs safety and the age factor sometimes isn't considered . Your parents know your a responsible person , I guess they can sometimes forget that aspect . You know your parents , talk with them and let them know your feelings . If your really happy there , stay . Happiness for all of you will be the result

kered · Jul 27, 2006

milagros317 said:
You did the responsible thing by calling them to tell them you wouldn't be home, so that they wouldn't worry. Their reaction was not appropriate for parents of an adult. Sigh.

My only advice is to save you money now as fast as you can, and move into your own place (alone or with a roommate to save expenses) when you can.

I whole heartedly agree with Mils and I would add one thing. However much money you think you will need to move out right now....double it!! Tough it out until you reach that goal. There are a lot of expenses you don't think about until they sneak up on you.

TicklishLurker · Jul 28, 2006

I feel your pain, TH. I'm going to be 30 in September and I just mentioned to my mom that a friend up in LA is having a birthday party next month - and you'd think I just said I planned on hiking through Europe (or possibly Iraq) wearing nothing but a string bikini! It's ridiuclous. My brother Todd who's an alcoholic and is known for drinking when not kept under strict watch is allowed to do whatever he wants, but me, who's never done anything bad is treated like I'm going to go out and rampage.

It's so frustrating. Especially since I just don't make enough to move out.

Hey, I know what, we could freak both our sets of parental units out. Let's run off to Vermont and get married. LOL :twohugs: