The Fallen Angel
3rd Level Red Feather
- Joined
- Jan 24, 2009
- Messages
- 1,587
- Points
- 0
What do the Dallas Cowboys and Billy Graham have in common?
They both can make 70,000 people stand up and yell "Jesus Christ".
woman in Dallas calls 911. When the officer answers the phone the woman is hysterical and tells the cop that a man has just broken into her home and she thinks he intends to rape her. The officer explain that they are just extremely busy at the moment and tells her "Just get the guy's jersey number and we'll get back to you.".
Wade Philips, clearly upset after the Cowboys lost a game, decides to find out from Bill Belichick what his secret is. So, he travels up to a Patriot practice and asks Belichick, "Coach, how is it that your team is so good? What's your secret?"
Belichick responds by calling Tom Brady over. "Tom, who's your father's brother's nephew?" Tom answers, "Why coach, that's easy. It's me." Belichick turns to Philips and says, "That's the secret, Bill. A smart quarterback. You've got to have a smart quarterback."
Thinking he's finally got all the tools he needs, Philips returns to Texas and the Cowboy work-out. He promptly calls over Tony Romo. "Tony! Who's your father's brother's nephew?" Tony looks perplexed, thinks a minute and says, "Coach, can I get back to you after practice on that one?" Philips (disgusted) says, OK.
During practice, Romo calls over Marion Barber. "Coach just asked me the weirdest question. Who's your father's brother's nephew?" Barber: "Duh! That's easy. It's me!" After practice, Romo catches up with Philips: "Coach, I think I've got it. My father's brother's nephew is Marion Barber." Philips (angry): "No, No, NO! You idiot!! It's Tom Brady!!!"
I understand Chicago is trying to sign Michael Irvin. They got rid of the refrigerator, so now they want a coke machine.
Why is Tony Romo unable to answer a telephone?
He can't find the receiver.
What do you call the cowboys being on vacation?
the playoffs
A Redskins fan, a Cowboys fan, a Giants fan, and an Eagles fan were all mountain climbing together one day. When they finally reach the top of the mountain, all four are standing around when the Redskins fan inexplicably says, "This one is for the Skins" and jumps off the mountain. The Eagles fan, not wanting to be out done, says "This one is for the Eagles," and jumps off the mountain. The Giants fan then says, "This one is for everybody" and pushes the Cowboys fan off the cliff.
Q: What do you call 47 people sitting around a TV watching the Playoffs?
A: The Dallas Cowboys
Q: What’s the difference between a Cowboys fan and a baby?
A: Eventually the baby stops whining
Did you hear that Jerry Jones is thinking about renaming the Cowboys the Tampons?
Because they are only good for one period and they have no second string.
Did you hear that Jerry Jones is thinking about singing Tera Patrick as his new head coach?
She might blow a few but she wont choke on the big one
i have bad news.. tony romo just attempted sucide...it didn't work the bullet got intercepted
They both can make 70,000 people stand up and yell "Jesus Christ".
woman in Dallas calls 911. When the officer answers the phone the woman is hysterical and tells the cop that a man has just broken into her home and she thinks he intends to rape her. The officer explain that they are just extremely busy at the moment and tells her "Just get the guy's jersey number and we'll get back to you.".
Wade Philips, clearly upset after the Cowboys lost a game, decides to find out from Bill Belichick what his secret is. So, he travels up to a Patriot practice and asks Belichick, "Coach, how is it that your team is so good? What's your secret?"
Belichick responds by calling Tom Brady over. "Tom, who's your father's brother's nephew?" Tom answers, "Why coach, that's easy. It's me." Belichick turns to Philips and says, "That's the secret, Bill. A smart quarterback. You've got to have a smart quarterback."
Thinking he's finally got all the tools he needs, Philips returns to Texas and the Cowboy work-out. He promptly calls over Tony Romo. "Tony! Who's your father's brother's nephew?" Tony looks perplexed, thinks a minute and says, "Coach, can I get back to you after practice on that one?" Philips (disgusted) says, OK.
During practice, Romo calls over Marion Barber. "Coach just asked me the weirdest question. Who's your father's brother's nephew?" Barber: "Duh! That's easy. It's me!" After practice, Romo catches up with Philips: "Coach, I think I've got it. My father's brother's nephew is Marion Barber." Philips (angry): "No, No, NO! You idiot!! It's Tom Brady!!!"
I understand Chicago is trying to sign Michael Irvin. They got rid of the refrigerator, so now they want a coke machine.
Why is Tony Romo unable to answer a telephone?
He can't find the receiver.
What do you call the cowboys being on vacation?
the playoffs
A Redskins fan, a Cowboys fan, a Giants fan, and an Eagles fan were all mountain climbing together one day. When they finally reach the top of the mountain, all four are standing around when the Redskins fan inexplicably says, "This one is for the Skins" and jumps off the mountain. The Eagles fan, not wanting to be out done, says "This one is for the Eagles," and jumps off the mountain. The Giants fan then says, "This one is for everybody" and pushes the Cowboys fan off the cliff.
Q: What do you call 47 people sitting around a TV watching the Playoffs?
A: The Dallas Cowboys
Q: What’s the difference between a Cowboys fan and a baby?
A: Eventually the baby stops whining
Did you hear that Jerry Jones is thinking about renaming the Cowboys the Tampons?
Because they are only good for one period and they have no second string.
Did you hear that Jerry Jones is thinking about singing Tera Patrick as his new head coach?
She might blow a few but she wont choke on the big one
i have bad news.. tony romo just attempted sucide...it didn't work the bullet got intercepted
Last edited:
