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Dilbert's Rules of Order

TKpervert

1st Level Yellow Feather
Joined
Sep 21, 2002
Messages
3,166
Points
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1. I can only please one person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow is not looking good either.

2. I love deadlines. I especially like the whooshing sound they make as they go flying by.

3. Tell me what you need, and I'll tell you how to get along without it.

4. Accept that some days you are the pigeon and some days the statue.

5. Needing someone is like needing a parachute. If he isn't there the first time, chances are you won't need him again.

6. I don't have an attitude problem, you have a perception problem.

7. Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky, and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling!!!???

8. Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, because you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup.

9. Everybody is somebody else's weirdo.

10. Never argue with an idiot. They drag you down to their level, and then beat you with experience.

11. A pat on the back is only a few centimeters from a kick in the butt.

12. Don't be irreplaceable - if you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.

13 .After any salary raise, you will have less money at the end of the month than you did before.

14. The more crap you put up with, the more crap you are going to get.

15. You can go anywhere you want if you look serious and carry a clipboard.

16. Eat one live toad the first thing in the morning and nothing worse will happen to you the rest of the day.

17. If it wasn't for the last minute, nothing would get done.

18. When you don't know what to do, walk fast and look worried.

19. Following the rules will not get the job done.
 
LOL, especially at number 8. 😛
Very funny list. 😀
 
Re; #'s 16 and 18;

Regarding # 16, nothing worse will happen to the toad that day either. :woot:

Regarding # 18, When in trouble or in doubt, run in circles, scream and shout! 😕

And never forget number 20; There are few business problems that can not be solved by the judicious application of high explosives! :angel:
 
loved them all especially this one..



7. Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky, and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling!!!???
 
LOL - some new one's there I hadn't heard before.

Love that "crunchy and taste good with catsup" line!
 
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